I Hate Minnesota

Global warming my ass!

I'll take the freaking tornadoes they got in Florida over this schtick!

How Will Hugo Go?

An excellent article in The Economist how Hugo Chavez is spending his oil windfalls like a drunken duo sorority girl and trophy wife with daddy's credit card.



I like the chart because (well, I like charts) it shows you just how dependent he is on a high price of oil. It also shows you how much spending he's done bribing people with this temporary windfall.

But what I get a kick out of the most is that Chavez and all his supporters who clamour about socialism can only contribute their success to the high price of oil which has been driven up in price by largely our growing capitalist economy here in the US and the capitalist free market reforms that have bolstered China's and India's growth thereby boosting the demand for oil

That reality is really a bitch isn't it?

Operation Ireland

I had this cunning plan that I'd move to Ireland, enjoy their low tax status and gain citizenship by marrying a gorgeous Irish lass and launch a global corporation I have an idea for.

Then I started researching their property markets there.


Cripes! I need the dollar to rebound something fierce!

However, this did remind me of a thought I had.

While the prices may be prohibitive, a country, county, city or state that has such high prices innoculates itself against a whole bevy of societal ills in that it keeps the criminals and non-wealth producers/parasites out of the region. This results in lower crime and other benefits, but if you are allowed to go and work and are surrounded by other people who are allowed to go and work, and nobody's there asking for a handout because they're all too busy working, then an economy to scale takes place and the ability for somebody to make enough money to live there, increases dramatically as well as the wealth producing region of the entire economy (Luxembourgh I often think like this). So kind of in a reverse PPP adjusting sort of way, those prices are maybe not that unaffordable.

The trick is to get in...of course I can't afford it...which makes me one of those parasitic schleps.

By the Numbers

Ahem.

Perfect Example of Leftist Media Bias; Exxon

OK, so this is the headline at CNN (and Drudge even)



What gets me is that 4th quarter earnings were DOWN from the previous year AS ONE WOULD EXPECT SINCE THE PRICE OF OIL HAS DROPPED SO MUCH!!!



But nobody seems to point that out, this common sensical relationship between the profits a commodity company makes and the price of the commodity company.

I guarantee you with the low price of oil for the 1st quarter in 2007 we will not see;

"CNN NEWS FLASH, EXXON MOBIL'S PROFITS TANK IN 1ST QUARTER 2007! Big Environmentalists Suspected, Bush Foresakes Big Oil!"

Because that does not play to the conspiracy theories of "Big Oil" of the left.

The Lawyers are Coming Hurray, Hurray!

I pulled these charts from one of my older posts as I've found them interesting.

I particularly like the surge in law students with the baby boomers.




And with the democrats in office, no doubt any shot at tort reform is out the window...not that the Republicans were all over that either.

I Like Smart Women

That's one of the great paradoxes living here in the Great White North,

that you can't find BOTH looks and smarts.

It's almost like setting up a character for D&D or a video game and you're only alloted a certain amount of points to allocate to looks, charisma, intelligence, wisdom, strength, etc. etc.

So you know if the girl is super attractive, then you're pretty sure she's super dumb simply because before she was born she put all her points into looks.

But I may have found the cure for what ails many-o-American men; Iceland.

It's the only country where the women score higher than men in not only reading/social sciences, BUT ALSO MATH according to a study put out by the OECD.



Alas, it may not be impossible to have looks and intelligence.

One More Time, For the Stupid People

Seeing the true Nazis of our generation have seemed to make it to the front headlines, I find it necessary to once again, repost this seemingly overlooked fact that the temperature of the Earth, going back 400,000 years is chaotic and volatile and that we are fools to require 6 billion people and 35 trillion dollars worth of economies come to a halt and change their lifestyles for a bunch of childish socialists and their conspiracy theory.



Somebody should be compiling a list of these scientists so 2 decades from now when temperatures go down, we can ruin their careers.

And You Thought the Worst Was Over?

Ha! The best is yet to come with the housing crash!












And I'm a-sensing a slight recession in the wind.

I also forecast smaller banks and mortgage firms that got all high on the "Housing Bubble Hooch" and made insanely stupid loans are going to collapse and consolidate.

That damn reality, always burstin' everybody's bubble.

Bachelor Pad Economics - Lesson #2

For the ladies.

I walk into what is arguably the finest, classiest place in all of the Twin Cities right now;

Matty B's.

Matt Burke's joint, for those sports aficionados, of the Minnesota Vikings.

Happening jump swing band, ample dance floor, score of people dancing east coast swing. Everybody having a good time and dressed very professionally.

Now I shall level with you, I don't bother asking girls to dance much any more because they largely fall into three categories;

1. Female friends that there is no romatic potential.
2. Swing "SNatzi's" which is a contigent of 20 and 30 somethings in the Twin Cities that value their entire lives on their ability to swing and not their ability to get a job.
3. Girls that rehearse the Minnesotan Women State anthem; "No"

So upon entering Matty B's my primary objective was to have a cocktail, listen to the band, and as an unkbeknownst bonus side show laugh at this Jesus Freak I know wearing false-advertising-provocative clothing get hit on and serenaded by the sax player 30 years her senior.

But as I gallivant to a table to talk to a couple acquaintances, I see in the back corner this drop dead gorgeous girl.

Now, there are girls that you look at and in a factual manner say, "Yes, that girl is VERY attractive."

But it is a statement of fact. An emotionless obsevation.

Angelina Jolie is hot, sure, but I'd rather skin myself that talk to her.

But every once in a while, the old man upstairs sends you something that is not only a factually "attractive woman" but an attractive woman that has something else about her that is so COMPELLING that you have no choice but to go and pursue her.

And in an odd way, even though you haven't talked, it is no longer an emotionless observation that she is an insanely attractive woman, but there is actually an unexplained and unwarranted emotion you have for this particular femme fatale.

Other non-economist people just call this "love at first sight."

So when you put your hand on a hot stove burner, I remembered from biology class, the pulse or pain does not actually reach your brain, it goes to the brain stem, where the brain stem in an automated response will immediately jerk your hand away.

It was the same thing as I immediately got up out of my chair and with unrivalled confidence I approached the table where her and her girlfriend were sitting and I asked her to dance.

Band playing.

Ample, yet populated dance floor.

Good lookin' guy.

Good lookin' girl.

Decked to the nines.

And then....

The "Ping Pong Game."

Ah yes, the Ping Pong Game.

Let me explain this to all you aspiring female economists out there so that this does not happen to you.

You see, there are a very limited, VERY EFFING LIMITED supply of men out there that know how to dance and can make you look like a billion bucks out on the dance floor. Furthermore, there are very limited men (bravado set aside) like me who not only know how to dance, but enjoy it and would like nothing more than to take you on a whirlwind tour of the different ballrooms in the world to trip the light fantastic.

So when a guy comes up to you and asks you to dance there is a correct answer.

And that answer is "yes."

Now there are other answers that we men, of unrivalled skill, culture and talent, will accept that are incorrect answers knowing full well you've passed up a great catch and realize it is you that has truly lost out. Such acceptable answers are;

No

Not now

I'm tired

No thank you.

I don't know how to dance.

I'm just here to drink.

I'm gay.

Etc. etc.

But what we men, of unrivalled talent and culture, one might even say Cary-Grantishness (and I'm not being arrogant here) will not tolerate is when you point to your friend and in a 7th grade way say whilst giggling, "No, you dance with him."

And then your friend, in an equally childish, immature and insulting manner, giggles and then points back at you and says, "no, you dance with him."

And then in a ping-pong like fashion, completely oblivious to the man who has taken his time to come over there and offer you what is literally a once-in-a-life-time-opportunity point at each other and say;

"No you dance with him."

"No you dance with him."

"Tee hee. I don't know how do dance. No you."

"Tee hee!!! No I don't know how to dance. No you!"

"Oh, she knows how to dance, but she won't admit it."

"No, stop, you should be the one to dance with him."

All the while and in front of the young man who had the courage and fortitude to ask you to dance.

There is no quicker way to go from;

-A woman who had the potential to tell her grandchildren that grandpa saw her and fell in love with her the moment he saw her and said, "that is the woman for me" while grandpa to that day still thinks she is the most gorgeous woman on the face of the planet

to;

- A woman who is 50, frumpy and fat wondering why she's alone and divorced watching re-runs of Sex in the City and will die alone with Jessica Parker

than playing that insanely stupid, childish and unacceptable Ping Pong game.

So all aspiring Junior, Deputy, Official and otherwise Female Babe economists;

Bachelor Pad Economics - Lesson #2 - DON'T PLAY THE PING PONG GAME.

Say "yes."

Why I'm a Genius and Why Chicks Should Dig Me

Sorry for the short posts here crew, but finally putting the finishing touches on my move, namely an X-Box 360.

And you can't just buy it.

You have to set it up.

And you can't just set it up.

You have to test it.

And you can't just test it with anything.

You have to test it with Call of Duty 3, because lord knows when those Nazi bastards are coming back.

But, as with most things, genius does not strike when you are sitting there philosophizing. For example, not one good idea ever came from a philosopher at some university's philosophy department (beyond new and creative ways to rationalize socialism).

Genius strikes when you're doing day to day tasks where you have to sit and do nothing.

Going #2 is a perfect example. I theorize more great ideas were concocted whilst sitting on the can. Going #1 doesn't really give you the time.

But in my particular case, genius finds me more often than not while I'm driving. Going here, going there, going to work, going to dance, going to class, etc. etc. I think I must drive about 10 hours per week and that's a lot of time for genius striking.

Well it struck last night when I was going to pick up the newest member to the Cappy Cap household (read-X-Box 360).

I have found a way to solve our global warming problem that will be palatable, if not, preferable to both sides.

And no, I'm being serious, I am not kidding.

You see, it has not been since 1998 that I've had an office job where I actually had to be there. ie-the technology existed that the duties of my job could have been done from home.

Yes, it may have cost a little bit to install a higher end computer or high speed internet, and yes I may have had to put a fax machine in, but by and large, and ESPECIALLY TODAY, most people have the set up by which they could work from home.

And I'd gander that if one thinks about it, most, I'd say 75% of office jobs could be done from a home office. If not at lesast 75% of the work could be done from home, thereby eliminating the need to drive to work.

If companies were to allow employees to work from home this would render a bevy of benefits.

First there'd be a lot fewer cars on the road, less traffic jams, what cars that would be on the road would get to where they're going much faster, thereby exhausting less "greenhouse gases" thereby solving our problem (of course, most on the global warming crowd don't realize automobile emissions don't account for the majority of greenhouse gases and just hate people with nicer cars than them).

Second, you would not get the slightest argument from people whose jobs would then be done from home.

Third the highway system would wear out less, we'd arguably even need less money spent on roads and transportation in general.

The only drawback or road block I see to this is the Pointy-Haired Bosses of the world that compose (I estimate somedays) 99.9% of the corporate muckymucks of the world. Armed with MBA's they no longer can think independently or have a creative thought. That, or they're just such control freaks they cannot trust you will get your work done or that you might write that report IN YOUR BOXERS!!!!

But with spinless corporations bending over backward to seem "socially responsible" to they may placate the political crowd, the political will may be there for them to actually take measurable action and some corporations may just offer employees, or encourage employees to work at home because "they care about global warming."

Although, a conspirary theory does pop into mind.

If we eliminated the need for 75% of people to travel to work, we then by default eliminate the need for 75% of office space. Commercial property would tank, downtown office buildings would be rendered immediate money losers. Vacancies would sky rocket. Skyscrapers in every major city would have to convert to some other use (more freaking condos?). That's a whole lot of money that a whole lot of businesses don't want to see lost and may pose an economic argument why some businesses rather you not be able to work from home.

This aside, the idea is perfectly feasible. The government offers some kind of tax incentive or break for companies AND people that have a "work from home" program. It requires no costly expenditure by companies to cut back on emissions, the employees would eat it up.

All that's left to do is wait for the sure-to-come contra-American thinking that "we CAN'T do that because XYZ"

I hate those people.

Regardless, that's why I'm a genius and chicks should dig me.

Spanking North Korea

Modern day, pansified Western Diplomacy

Say It Aint' So Prodigal Joe!!!

No ECONOMICS SUPPER CLUB THIS WEEKEND????

Yep, sorry kids. AM 1500 is doing a special Twins promotion. And as all good capitalists, we know we have to bow to the market.

But don't worry, we'll be back next week with all our wholesome economic goodness.

In the meantime, keep tuning in, but methinks it's time for the Captain to take a vacation.

If You Really Want to Piss Off a Liberal

There are many things you can do. I STRONGLY recommend buying this book and giving it to the younger liberals, but if you don't want to drop the $12 on the book (or $5 on the Kindle version) there are many things you can do like;

1. Feel no guilt for your success.
2. Succeed and insist that you did it by hard work and failed many times before you succeeded and that the reason most people fail is because they never try.
3. Work in the private sector
4. Compete
5. Insist you keep score
6. have a box of Kleenex handy so when they open their mouth and complain, you can give them a tissue to cry in.
7. Point out America is successful because of a combination of capitalism, British culture, hard work, military strength and aggression, as well as engineering and science (not art and philosophy or "Insertethnicgrouphere"Studies).
8. Point out that people like you don't need people like them to survive as you support yourself. Yet people like them need people like you to survive because they are not self-reliant and need income transfers and therefore should be grateful...or just call them an ungrateful parasite, it's just quicker.

But if you really want to give them a heart attack just show them this chart of executive compensation as a multiple of the average worker's earnings;



And then, like The Economist did in the article, defend it.

Where the Smart Money Is

Free markets really piss off leftists.

The idea that people can just take their money and invest it where they please all whilly nilly like, pursuing evil things like "profit" and "success" and "progress."

When they really just ought to bend over and take it and shell out money to the poor as they should (you really should click this link and read it, it's a short piece).

What really gets the left's ire up is when free people in a free market have the audacity to take their money and MOVE IT OUT of a market because one of their ilk starts making it unprofitable to stay in that particular market.

One such an example is the French rockstar that decided to leave France and change his citizenship to Swiss to avoid about a 70% tax rate. The hell this poor boy caught.

Another one is the bevy of people bailing out of Venezuela's market when Hugo Dumbsh!t Chavez opened his mouth. Venezuelan markets tanked as the wealth producers and savvy foreign investors seeing him nationalize anything of any worth, bailed out on that nation.



Best follow the smart money.

The Hypocrisy is Astounding

I interviewed Ilan Sharon, a representative for the movie Obsession, a while back about the movie and his general thoughts on it. It was a good interview, and unfortunately we did not have the time to fully discuss what we wished. However, after the show, he pulled me aside and mentioned the "Island Hopping" theory he had about how brainwashed muslims couldn't link nor maintain consistent arguments, ergo, there really isn't any basis or rationale in their hatred for the US and the West, and it more or less boiled down to religious fanaticism that drove him.

The example he gave me was this;

"If you go up to a radical muslim and say, "what do you think about 9-11 and who brought the Towers down," the majority of them will say it was a conspiracy between the Jews and Bush to give them a reason to persecute muslims. "

But then ask them what they think about Osama Bid Laden and they say, "YEAH!!! Wasn't he great!! Did you see what he did to the Twin Towers!!???"

Another interesting example of sign of mental retardation is when a journalist (whose name escapes me now) interviewed some Lebanese muslims asking them what they thought about America.

"We hate it, we want to wage jihad against it, blah blah blah."

And then when he asked them, "Where would you like to live?"

"OH, we would love to live in America! It's free! Everybody is successful, you can do what you want!"

So, young junior, aspiring, and official deupty economists, can somebody explain these two pictures I've found?





And Lee Hamilton and his leftist likes think we can engage in "constructive dialogue" with these bipolar freaks?

Great.

Iranian Super Models

No wonder their men are so pissed off and want to blow everything up.

http://www.farsnews.com/imgrep.php?nn=8510270448

I've Had This Debate Before

Albeit a bit more diplomatically, but my argument was that attraction is determined by the opposite sex. ie- heterosexual men and homosexual women determine whether women are attractive, just was heterosexual woman and homosexual men determine whether men are attractive.

http://www.leasticoulddo.com/index2.php?date=20030901

But try to tell any woman that you don't find pregnant women attractive, even though you are a heterosexual male and ergo by definition define what is attractive in the opposite sex and you are a sexiest, evil, jerk.

Ode the Members of the Cappy Cap Crew

Sinfest is the best online comic, period.

But the resemblance of this comic is unbelievably uncanny to my crew in Minneapolis, I must honor my friends by posting it. Ergo you will forgive me for posting these, while the inside jokes will only be gotten by the members of The Crew.

http://www.leasticoulddo.com/index2.php?date=20030221

this one is for all the Guys of the Minneapolis Crew

http://www.leasticoulddo.com/index2.php?date=20030305

And the guys at UMPD

http://www.leasticoulddo.com/index2.php?date=20030416

And all the guys in American that plum had chivalry kicked out of them by this time

http://www.leasticoulddo.com/index2.php?date=20030508

This one's for Fed-Ex

http://www.leasticoulddo.com/index2.php?date=20030515

This one's for the Crew's Cougar Hunter-Minh

http://www.leasticoulddo.com/index2.php?date=20030529

Marinti's Flow, Babe's Show Because they Know

The Economics Supper Club is on!

This Saturday (and every Saturday) from 1-3PM central standard time on the Twin Citie's largest and most popular talk station, AM 1500, KSTP.

Tune in on the radio or listen online at www.am1500.com

Call in with your stories, your comments or tales.

651-646-8255

OR

For you Canucks up north and all points in between,

1-877-615-1500

You will enjoy.