Why We Should Let Women Have Corporate America

Women's Take Over of Corporate America

An Agent in the Field of mine, deeply seeded in a large multinational, sent me an e-mail he received from company's Office of Diversity.  It was heralding the "great success" of their "initiative" to employ and promote more women in the company.  They had an arbitrarily set goal of increasing female employment (in this predominantly IT/Tech male company) up to 30%, and even handed out awards to employees that came up with the "top three ideas" on how to get more women on board (this included a "mother's contract," a blatantly sexist policy of hiring one woman for every man regardless of ability, and - the only sane one - to attract more women into STEM).  You couple this with the recent statement from SalesForce.com's new "Chief Equality Officer" Tony Prophet,

"At Ford, quality is job one.  At Salesforce, equality is job one."

and it is painfully clear that corporate America has abandoned excellence as a means to profitability, replacing it instead with virtue signalling, rent seeking, politicking, and marketing/pandering to racial/sexual in-tribe biases.

This, of course, is not only morally wrong, but blatantly sexist (and racist) as you consciously and purposely give preferential treatment to people based on the color of their skin, or their plumbing downstairs, over the content of their character.  And anybody with an ounce of self-respect, intellectual honesty, a work ethic, and an adherence to true fairness should be outraged at this cowardice and evil.

But then the ole Captain's wheels started turning, and in a very Enjoy the Decline-esque way, he make a very important epiphany.  Yes, it may be unfair we are giving preferential treatment to women over men.  Yes, we are sacrificing a meritocracy for sexism.  And yes, this will lead to lower production, lower economic growth, genuine injustice, and a lessening of standards of living.  But so what?   If you really sit down and think about it Corporate America isn't worth it.

Let the women have it.

It's All Yours, Sweetheart!

If it were the 1950's and corporations were booming and headed up by more fair and meritocratic WWII managerial class, I could see Corporate America being a place you'd want to be.  You'd be compensated for excellence and hard work.  You'd be promoted for innovation and creativity.  It would be a reasonably just system where loyalty was rewarded, stable employment was offered, and corporate corruption was at a minimum (at least compared to today).

But it's not the 1950's any more.  It's "the current year" and corporations are a fraction of the equitable places of employment they once were.

Gone are the managers from the WWII generation that led these corporations to their heights and their Jack Welshian logical, but fair management.  They are now replaced with legions of inept, MBA-laden Baby Boomer scum whose only accomplishment was halving US economic growth, getting the largest bank bail out in history, and sending the US into the largest financial crisis since the Great Depression.

Gone is stable employment and the goodies that came with it.  You don't get pensions, you don't get health care, and you certainly don't get that 30 years of lifelong employment that once made a 30 year mortgage a relatively risk free proposition.  Now you can get outsourced, train in your own replacements, be perpetually employed as a contractor, and let go if your job can be done for a fraction of a cent cheaper in China.

And let's not forget the wave of psychotic political BS these past 20 years that has infected Corporate America and just chides the morality and honor of good, honest workers, particularly of the male persuasion.  There's the HR lady epidemic where we put power hungry, inept, math-impaired 20 something ditzes at the helm of our hiring process.  There's "Corporate Social Responsibility" where we force unrelated and unnecessary political crusades on our employees be it donating to the United Way, mandating weekends be spent on charities, or wearing pink every year.  There's diversity, sexual harassment, and sensitivity training where we blatantly treat men like sexual predators, molesters, rapists, and racists, humiliating them to attend said trainings.  There's the eggshell environment men get to work in, one mere false sexual harassment accusation away from being fired.  There's the invasion of privacy into our personal lives where the politically correct Corporate Abwehr will fire you over a facebook post.  There's progressive credentialism where the HR Reichstag demands you have masters degrees for entry level jobs.  There's the blatant sexism against males as previously evidenced before with clearly sexist policies favoring less-qualified women for the sake of "diversity."  And let's not forget this raw deal is topped off with the number one cause of divorce, marital strife, and problem children - commutes!

I ask one simple question.  Who the f*ck wants any part of this rotten deal?  Who the f*ck wants to work at Initech?

And I'm not joking.

I'm not saying this because deep down inside I want to work at Corporate America.  I'm not saying this because I have this discreet dream to retake and recapture Corporate America for meritocratic males.  I'm saying it because it's true.  Corporate America is a HORRIBLE deal for any self-respecting man (or woman) who wants to live a free, healthy, happy, sane, and prosperous life.  You, at minimum, must attend school for a quarter century, face daunting odds of just landing a job.  That job will at best be entry level and mundane.  You're then forced to get a masters if you have any hope of "making it" due to progressive credentialism.  You are a mere merger away from being let go or laid off.  Your compensation is significantly lower with both sexes now flooding the labor market, lowering the wage you can command.  You can't have a political or social life your employer doesn't approve of.  Compensation and promotion is increasingly based on your skin color and plumbing, not your hard work or effort.  And if this wasn't a horrible deal enough, it's all under a psychotic environment where bosses who know they have you by the balls unleash their sadism on their employees simply to get off.

There's just no godly reason to be part of Corporate America.

The real question is, then, why do women seem so desperate and adamant on joining Corporate America?  Why do they seem so obsessed over having a corporate career to the point they'll get one via legitimate means or not?  And the answer is they've been sold a bill of goods.

The Biggest Lie Ever Sold...To Women

I've mentioned it before, but understand like housing, education or Dotcoms, women are buying into a bubble.  Perhaps not a financial one like those mentioned before, but a bubble nonetheless.  They go to college (a bubble and increasingly poor investment unto itself) at rates higher than men, earning the majority of worthless liberal arts degrees, also now accounting for the majority of worthless masters/advanced degrees.  With these worthless degrees, they then throw themselves onto the Omaha Beach of Corporate America where they forfeit family, children, husbands, a social life, and loved ones, all in exchange for promotions, careers, commutes, and Jimmy Choo shoes.  They obsess about "leaning in" and getting the latest certification, credential, or promotion in their lives.  And congratulations if they make that magical six figures.

But to what end?

Not only do they have to suffer the unacceptable environment laid out before, basically ruining and sacrificing their lives, but all so they can become "Queen Bee of Shit Island?"

Alas, it's obvious women didn't consciously decide on their own to pursue the hell known as Corporate America.  They were duped, lied to, propagandized, and fooled into becoming corporate slaves.  And any simple, logical pondering will come up with the main culprits that misled women into choosing such a rotten deal.

First, blame men.  Not consciously, or maliciously, but men are to blame because I don't think they ever truly conveyed what they endured in Corporate America, working a real job to support the family.  In the past, traditionally, men went to work, brought home the bacon, and in order to have a peaceful and enjoyable home, they didn't bring back their work with them.  The wife didn't want to hear about the conditions of working on the railroad, the loneliness of being a traveling salesman, or the politics of a corporate office, and the man frankly didn't want to talk about it either.  He wanted to eat good meal, have sex with his wife, play with his children, and enjoy his free time.  This then misled women into thinking somehow work was fun.  And not only was work fun,  it was MUCH MORE FUN AND REWARDING than being a homekeeper, housewife, or mother.  They only saw the financial upside of Corporate America, not the labor and responsibility that came with.

Second, feminism.  The greatest scam ever pulled in the history of humans was not social security, nor buying Manhattan from the Indians for some beads, nor Seward's Folly.  It was the con job bitter, angry, ugly, jealous, contemptuous women from the 60's and 70's pulled by convincing their prettier, younger counterparts that being a mother or a wife was not real work.  It was fooling three full generations of women that they didn't need men, and that a paycheck (government or Corporate America issued) could replace a passionate kiss from a loving husband and a swarm of hugs from her children.  The fact that women are trying to break into Corporate America, by any means possible, moral or not, sexist or not, while forfeiting a life of staying at home and spending time with their children is jaw dropping once you can remove the hood of leftist, feminist brainwashing.  No sane, self-respecting person would do that back in the 50's, let alone in today's sadistic and enslaving corporate environment.
  
Third, politicians.  Like feminists, it is amazing the con job the democrat party pulled on women.  By making women jealous of what men had, and not appreciating what they had, politicians created a problem that didn't exist.  They thoroughly convinced women they were oppressed, discriminated against, and that sexism was rampant.  And the only way to make things right was by voting in these politicians.  Politicians would enforce affirmative action, enforce Title IX, give you a never ending litany of PSA's and speeches blasting those evil males for their inherent sexism and privilege, and as an added bonus, designate the government as your sole supporter and provider making those nasty evil men unnecessary and obsolete.  This propaganda was so successful, it actually overrode women's genetic programming to the point they actually believed "women need men like a fish needs a bicycle."  And if you needed more proof as to the completeness of the job, women look up to and envy the life of one of the world's most miserable women - Hillary Clinton.  Women, once again, gave up anything and everything that gave them point and purpose in life, all for a masters degree, a commute, and a cold career in Corporate America.

And finally, there's Corporate America itself.  The best thing for Corporate America was women entering the work force.  It lowered wages, it boosted demand for their products (now that women had additional purchasing power), and it created demand for a whole new list of products and services.  Daycare facilities, additional cars, more gas, more insurance, more dining out, more clothes, more cell phones, more divorce lawyers, more child therapists, more cleaning services, more ritalin, more lithium, more everything - the amount of material goods and services families had to buy now that you had two workers, no parents, and needed to outsource your child rearing easily boosted their sales by 50%.  It was a boon in terms of both sales and lower labor costs that only outsourcing to China would outdo.  Of course, the family suffered, divorce ravaged three generations, mal-raised children of broken homes drove up everybody's taxes, women we're becoming less happy, and the country's finances went to pot, but it didn't matter.  Women had careers in Corporate America.  And that's all that matters.

So What Do Men Do Now?

It's a foregone conclusion that with the support of government and corporations themselves, women will inexorably take over Corporate America.  And any sober, realistic, self-respecting assessment of Corporate America will conclude we should let them have it.  But if men are to give up Corporate America what are they supposed to do for work?  What do we do for employment?  What do we do for agency?  What do we do in order to support ourselves and live our lives to the fullest?

The prospective loss of what has traditionally kept us employed and alive is daunting, and willingly giving it up may seem insane.  But giving up on a career in Corporate America is a reality we're just going to have to face.  And not only one we have to face, but one we should be welcoming.  For while abandoning what has served as our primary means of support may be daunting, we men have a trick up our sleeves that have served us well since time immemorial.

We adapt.

Understand Corporate America is a bubble.  It's the Titanic.  It's going to burst and sink anyway, so you're better off living in reality and coming up with a Plan B.  But while many of you may not see an obvious alternative to Corporate America for employment, millions of men have already blazed the trail to a new, and much better form of employment - minimalism and entrepreneurship.

Though not the traditional corporate career we originally wanted or were brought up to desire, minimalism and entrepreneurship is the only logical choice for any man not already:

1.  Steeped so far in Corporate America in terms of his career that it would not be economic for him to abandon it and start down the path of entrepreneurship, or

2.  Endebted in terms of student loans, auto loans, mortgages, alimony, child support, etc. that he is a debt slave and therefore needs to be in Corporate America.

The reason why is that minimalism and entrepreneurship is infinitely superior to working for Corporate America.  One, in being a minimalist you do not need that much money to survive.  You avoid debt, you avoid unnecessary luxuries, and in doing so you not only minimize what you need, but maximize your freedom.  This leads to a second important benefit - the ability to insist on employment standards.  If the pay isn't high enough, they won't let you telecommute, it isn't enjoyable work, or your client is just a lippy pain in the ass, simple.  You fire them.  You just quit.  You don't need the money and therefore can do without them.  This also leads to a third major benefit - you can bluff your way to higher compensation.  Unlike your divorced, debt-enslaved, Corporate American wage slave counterpart, you don't "need" the money.  You have a choice.  You aren't a beggar, you're a chooser.  This allows you to demand $100 an hour, because if you don't get it, so what?  You don't NEED it.  Alas, if done right self-employment can, in the long run, become much more lucrative than a Sheryl Sandbergian corporate slave career.

But perhaps the single largest benefit of the minimalism-entrepreneurship form of employment is the happiness and sanity that comes with it.  While you're sleeping in till 10, your Super-Power-Tripping-Corporate-America-Power-Woman is waking up at 6 to suffer her commute at 7.  While you're at your local bar getting your morning coffee with Bailey's at 11 to answer e-mails, your rah-rah empowered feminist counterpart is stuck in a meeting, begging the government for more grant money.  When you decide you've done enough work at 2PM and it's time to hit the gym, your "You-Go-Girrrrrrl Power-Moxie"(TM) Corporate America counterpart is only half way done with her day.  And when your kids come home from school at 4PM, you can take them out for ice cream, go swimming with them, or give them noogies, the strong-independent, divorced, Corporate American "single mom hero" leaves her kids to decay in daycare till 7, and that's if traffic has cleared up.

It's simply a no-brainer.

The sad tragedy, for women at least, is that men are one, small epiphany away from realizing the wise words of Freddy Benson in Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, and switching our historical roles.  It was already hard supporting oneself in this world.  It's much, MUCH harder supporting a family.  But if socialist, sexist (and racist) political forces are going to insist on turning Corporate America into a childish insane asylum like today's Academia with "safe spaces," "mandatory diversity training," and a blatant favoritism for women, forget it.  "I say it's time for a change.  I say let them give us money.  Let's live off of them for a while."  And men can do it, not just because we're more capable of minimalism, but (hilariously and ironically) women have also voted in a huge welfare state.  And if they want to be the ones to slave and work away in Corporate America, then they can pay the taxes to support men who just, meh, don't fee like working.

Alas, women fought so hard (as well as unfair and dirty) to get ahead in Corporate America, I cannot think of a better fate than to let them have it.  And the only way to give it to them is to realize losing Corporate America is no great loss, but a blessing.  Let women do the work.  Let women drive the commutes.  Let women waste their lives in meetings and cubes while the world passes them by.  I'm going fishing.  I'm sleeping in.  I'm working out.  I'm riding motorcycles.  I'm spending time with friends, families, and loved ones.  I'm going to Enjoy the Decline.  I suggest you do the same.
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