"Raise Other Mens' Children" Not in My Job Description

When I applied for the job "Bachelor" the job description was, if I recall correctly, something along the lines of:

"WANTED : BACHELOR

Must be able to support yourself and only be willing to support yourself. Must spend all of your discretionary income on you and things you like. This includes, but is not limited to:

Video games
Booze
Cigars
Motorcycles
Trips
Vacations
Sushi and other delicious food

Must have the ability to be free and enjoy freedom. Do what you want, when you want, how you want.

Candidate must also enjoy hanging out with friends, chasing tail, dating many girls, drinking beer, watching movies.

Significant free time and leisure time is expected on the job. You will have minimal responsibilities. After working up enough money to support yourself and paying taxes to support others, you MUST then spend the remaining money on yourself and what you like.

Workout, stay in shape, and develop hobbies and interests that are eclectic and mentally rewarding and stimulating.

Avoid sickness by avoiding coming into contact with children.

Vasectomy optional, but preferred.

All qualified candidates can come down to Joe's Bar for drinking-pre-qualification testing."

Nowhere did it say, "must raise other people's children."

I truly wonder if all the "baby mama's" in the world (or at least the US) actually think that single men, who kept their act together and built a lives for themselves actually owe it to them to bring up other mens' children. As if paying taxes for their mistakes via WIC or EBT or subsidized housing or day care isn't enough. No, they want us to commit ourselves personally. Because (GASP! NO! YOU MEAN???)

A GOVERNMENT CHECK ISN'T FULFILLING ENOUGH!? You mean government checks DON'T HUG YOU BACK!?

Sorry sweetheart, not in my job description.

Enjoy the decline.