Men,
Lend me your ears!
Do you want your Christmas to be marred with insufferable pain?
Do you want your ear drums popped by the screeches and howls of women?
If not, HEED MY WORDS!
Taketh not the Christmas gift bag, in all of its pretty shinnyness, and throw it away in the garbage.
Nay.
Reuse the shinny bag for presenting gifts to more people.
The reason not beith so that thee may reuse and recycle.
Nay.
It is to avoid the blood-curdling screams from the women when they see you threw away a gift bag and the ensuing 2 hour lecture about how you're supposed to use those pretty bags over and over.
Cappy...it pains me to disagree with you. But those gift bags are damned expensive! Hanging on to them makes economic sense.
ReplyDeleteSorta related...
We used to carry our marbles around in those velvetty purple Crown Royal sacks with the yellow drawstrings. Anyone remember those? If a kid brought that to school today, no doubt an hysterical feminazi indoctrinator would put in a frantic phone call to FCS, which would then swoop in and "rescue" the child.
It also saves you $4 on buying a new one, Mr. Cheap Bachelor.
ReplyDeleteThose purple Crown Royal bags with the yellow drawstrings see a lot of use as bags for dice among the tabletop gaming nerd crowd.
ReplyDelete... or so I've heard. It's not like I have a purple Crown Royal bag with a yellow drawstring full of polyhedral dice in my desk drawer right now or anything.
I certainly have never rolled for initiative.
ReplyDeleteOn a related note, I have somehow managed to acquire 5 'reusable' grocery bags, all from my mother, I believe. They have varying levels of embarassment painted on the sides.
ReplyDeleteI'll admit, though, they come in handy for bottle recycling.
Protip: if you rant about the environment at grocery stores which want to charge you $0.05 for their $0.001 plastic grocery bags, they'll usually comp them.
"It is to avoid the blood-curdling screams from the women when they see you threw away a gift bag and the ensuing 2 hour lecture about how you're supposed to use those pretty bags over and over."
ReplyDeleteYeah, you're an "Alpha", all right.
It's called nagging.
Mike James
Oh Izanpo, you brought back memories. I also had my marbles in a purple Crown Royal sack. We'd take them to school (a private Catholic one!) and play during recess!
ReplyDeleteLove the reusable grocery sacks. I can carry so much more in them than the plastic bags. Once had a jar of pickles fall through a plastic bag, and break on the driveway; wasn't a happy camper....lots of nasty words coming from this Catholic's mouth....had to go to confession...