Kill the Individual, Hail the Parasite

This is a brilliant piece for more reasons than one.  But what I particularly like about it is the reference to the "SBA loan" because it strikes close to home.

For those of you unfamiliar with the "SBA," it is a government agency set up to support idiotic, moronic, stupid, imbecilic, pathetic, losers and their equally idiotic, moronic, stupid, imbecilic, pathetic business ideas. ie- you suckers of taxpayers are paying America's DUMBEST (and I cannot stress how accurate that adjective is) "entrepreneurs" to pursue their hobbies, err..."dreams."

Did they have a business plan?

No.

Did they do the research necessary to make sure they didn't merely just take money from the taxpayer to pursue their stupid, idiotic bound-to-fail dreams?

No.

Did they have any real intention of running a legitimate business, let alone the business acumen to produce a profit?

Hell no.

Much as I'd like to besmirch the SBA as a failed venture capital firm that has no right financing or guaranteeing ANY private sector ventures with a taxpayer guarantee, but it is even more insulting than that.  The SBA is nothing more than a charity financing the world's dumbest people's hobbies.

I've seen horse ranches, sports bars, "pajama restaurants" (that's one where you show up for breakfast in your pajamas - the collateral tendered was milk and inventory), and no end to red-neck hick "tractor trailer" independent contractor types all financed and guaranteed by the tax payer thanks to the SBA.  Never mind none of these people have an IQ above 80.  Never mind none of these people have the slightest clue what it takes to run a business. Never mind they all have 2 divorces, and 5 children from 3 different mothers (sorry, I've been living in the sticks too long), no, those dumb idiots at the SBA are going to guarantee (with YOUR MONEY) the loans the private banks made to these chromosomed-challenged individuals.

So when Peggy Sue's "brilliant" "pet grooming" business plan fails, guess who ends up paying?

That's right, YOU DO.

Worse still is a program the SBA came up with called the "ARC" loan during the recession.  This was a program where you could borrow up to $35,000 if your company was having trouble.  So not only would the SBA provide the initial start up capital, if you ran into trouble it would double down providing you an ARC loan.  EVERY company I've seen with an ARC loan, the borrowers were stupefyingly stupid in their original business endeavor AND had no chance whatsoever to pay back the loan.   

Regardless, I've said it before, and I'll say it again.

The SBA is nowhere near as big of a problem as social security, medicare or medicaid.  But what irks me more than the fact this government entity has done nothing but waste billions in taxpayer's money, is how it legitimizes or validates the world's DUMBEST people as real "business people."  The trailer trash yokel who collected welfare and WIC all of the sudden thinks he's a real "business man" when a bank, that would normally NEVER in a million years make the loan, only does so because the SBA guarantees it.  This moron is no different than a welfare bum who collects a paycheck, BUT with the added benefit of having the attitude that "he's a business man."  I'd much rather just simply pay a welfare check to a guy who says, "Yeah, I'm scamming the system, so what?" than some doofus playing "make believe businessman" on my dime.

Mark my words, you will hear about the SBA in the future, just like Fannie Mae and Freddi Mac.