Tuesday, July 17, 2012

"Aspiring Rap Artist"

An idea inspired by a reader and Kathy, what would a google search for "aspiring rap artist" turn up?

Aspiring rap artist #1

Aspiring rap artist #2

Aspiring rap artist #3

Aspiring rap artist #4

Aspiring rap artist #5

Aspiring rap artist #6

Aspiring rap artist #7

(are you starting to see a trend here?)

Aspiring rap artist #8

Aspiring rap artist #9

Aspiring rap artist #10

I think that's enough.

Now I shall just add one, small thing.  What is the percentage of "aspiring jazz artists" that kill or get killed before they reach their 30th birthday?  I mean, I don't think Charlie Parker, Duke Ellington, Johnny Coltrane, Cpt. Jack McDuff, Louis Armstrong, Ella Fitzgerald and a whole host of other jazz musicians faced such a mortality rate in their careers.

10 comments:

  1. Anonymous12:24 PM

    Let's be fair, most of the google search results refer the 5 dollar bet incident.
    So this data doesn't show that aspiring rap artists die, rather it shows how interested people are in stupid deaths, and that one of this stupid deaths involved an aspiring rap artist.

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  2. Anonymous12:30 PM

    This article kind of reminds me of the book "How to Lie with Statistics".
    Since the percentage of aspiring rap artists is (unfortunately) much higher that the percentage of aspiring artist in other music genres (at least based on my personal statistics).

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  3. I thought the $5 bet death was only linked once? The rest of all individual and separate incidents.

    Unless I accidentally linked to the same guy twice?

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  4. Anonymous1:17 PM

    @Captain Capitalism: it is linked only once, but what I meant was that many of the google search results refer to the 5 dollar event, so calling this a trend might be to much.

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  5. Lib Arts Major Making $27k/yr At An Office Job1:45 PM

    Upon asking an entire local predominantly black High School's worth of teachers what the most common element was in problem children, the answer most often given was:

    They have no concept of future.

    So there you have it. The aspiring rap artists and gang members had it right all along. Live for today, because tomorrow will only suck more. They've been enjoying the decline this entire time.

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  6. Eh, hopelessness is one thing. But I doubt they're wise or old enough to come up with the concept of "enjoying the decline."

    I would say a lack of fathers. But then again we don't need no STIIIINNKINNNNNG fathers!

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  7. I've always liked what the late Sam Kinnison said: if you have to have serial killers, why can't they kill people who deserve? Like rappers!

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  8. Aspiring rap artist10:05 PM

    Check out my new tune:

    Mama doesn't love me
    My Daddy's on crack!
    It's all the fault of people
    Who aren't black!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I just added "Aspiring Rap Artist" to my Curriculum Vitae. Come, bask in my new found awesomeness.....

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous1:26 PM

    This reminds me of my favorite feminist math question. Jack has 6 apples, Jill has 4 apples. Jack gives 3 apples to Jill. Explain why Jill is being oppressed by the Patriarchy.

    ReplyDelete