I think every woman has a bit of hysteria in them...it just comes with the menstrual cycle.
That being said...if they go nuclear then yes you should remove that tumor. There's irritable mood and then there is dangerous BPD behavior.
Still no matter the situation face her moods like a man. If you truly aren't in the wrong and she is just making drama...stand up for yourself, be it making it known you won't put up with her by either leaving, or if she is a good girl most of the time...taking away rewarding behavior.
I have experienced this thing you call "female hysterics." I can't even remember what insanely idiotic thing caused the hysterics. I ended the relationship via a text message. No remorse. Over. Just like that. Let me tell this to every man out there: Every second of your life is precious. Don't ever let anybody waste your time on Earth with BS. The reason this hysterical behavior is so commonplace is that people tolerate it. Draw your line in the sand men.
The cause of female hysterics: suburban princess self-entitlement syndrome or SPSES.
The cause of men rushing in to resolve the female hysterics: white knightery and our underlying desire to protect women.
The appropriate response to female hysterics: "Don't ever waste my time with that BS." Then leave.
Best advice my Dad ever gave me- "Son, I don't care how beautiful, smart, charming or funny she is. Never forget someone out there is sick of putting up with her shit. How much you put up with is up to you."
One of the problems is that if you are very. very good looking... (a) no one calls you to account. (b) you think you do not have to make an effort.
Both are eventually wrong. I can think of DOZENS of actresses (with fairly screwed personalities: goes with the territorY) who were Hot +++ and they then find their husband / lover leaves them for a cute but not 9/10 looker because the other woman is sane.
Fathers: call you daughters and your wives on this.
Mothers: do not model this to your children. Yes you are moody. So. Is. He. Act like an adult and be civilized.
Men: if she cannot control your emotions on a date then... hasta la vista, babe.
I have experienced FH as well. I've done that a couple of times myself, but only when I was a crazy 15 year old. Mind you, that was a rather difficult period of life, so I was probably not mentally stable at that time.
I have also experienced other women who pull that crap, but as adults. I can tell you guys straight up: if she acts like that and especially if she's over the age of 18, GET THE F OUT!!!!! I can't stress that enough. Homegirl is nuts or has a bitchy entitlement attitude that you do NOT want to deal with over a long period of time. She will drain your soul.
Don't feel left out though, the crazies also do that to their female friends. I actually had it happen over the past weekend from my best friend. Needless to say, we will not be hanging out anymore.
Another female perspective, from a biochemical point of view:
There is how you feel, then there is how you act. They need not be the same thing -- and a smart woman knows how to act on her higher brain functions.
And, a real woman would have asked if she could grab you a soda while you filled up the gas tank -- which is what I always do when my husband gets gas.
"I've done that a couple of times myself, but only when I was a crazy 15 year old"
Don't beat yourself up, 15 year olds are almost uniformally, a) unbearably stupid or b) horribly miserable because they're _not_ unbearably stupid.
No one expects sane behavior from 15 year olds. But hystericss (absent a valid cause like death of a loved one or surviving attempted murder) from an 18+ year old are inexcusable.
I'm not letting men off either. They are partly to blame because most men will put up with way too much crap if a girl is pretty enough (as did the captain at one time).
Too many judge womens characters with their eyes (or fool themselves into thinking that women of character don't exist).
Rather than try for the hottest girl you can find (who is liable to not be sane because people have treated her like a freak for too long* and/or because keeping up peak hotness takes so much effort that her personality withers on the vine) lower the hotness standards a little (not completely but dial them back to something realistic) and invest in character.
*don't fool yourself into thinking your straight shooting will straighten her out, the bizarre enabling behavior from people around her have gone on for years and you're not going to overcome it
It's just American women who are unstable. Also, not all of them are so, but only those who swallow the line that men and women are fundamentally different. Those women become very mentally unstable. However, if you want to take a look at the emotional instability of American men, look no further than up in this thread. There it is.
I think every woman has a bit of hysteria in them...it just comes with the menstrual cycle.
ReplyDeleteThat being said...if they go nuclear then yes you should remove that tumor. There's irritable mood and then there is dangerous BPD behavior.
Still no matter the situation face her moods like a man. If you truly aren't in the wrong and she is just making drama...stand up for yourself, be it making it known you won't put up with her by either leaving, or if she is a good girl most of the time...taking away rewarding behavior.
I call them "emotional vampires."
ReplyDeleteI have experienced this thing you call "female hysterics." I can't even remember what insanely idiotic thing caused the hysterics. I ended the relationship via a text message. No remorse. Over. Just like that. Let me tell this to every man out there: Every second of your life is precious. Don't ever let anybody waste your time on Earth with BS. The reason this hysterical behavior is so commonplace is that people tolerate it. Draw your line in the sand men.
ReplyDeleteThe cause of female hysterics: suburban princess self-entitlement syndrome or SPSES.
The cause of men rushing in to resolve the female hysterics: white knightery and our underlying desire to protect women.
The appropriate response to female hysterics: "Don't ever waste my time with that BS." Then leave.
Wait. They now make clove cigarettes with FILTERS? No sweet/numb tip of the tongue? Why bother?
ReplyDeleteBest advice my Dad ever gave me- "Son, I don't care how beautiful, smart, charming or funny she is. Never forget someone out there is sick of putting up with her shit. How much you put up with is up to you."
ReplyDeleteOne of the problems is that if you are very. very good looking...
ReplyDelete(a) no one calls you to account.
(b) you think you do not have to make an effort.
Both are eventually wrong. I can think of DOZENS of actresses (with fairly screwed personalities: goes with the territorY) who were Hot +++ and they then find their husband / lover leaves them for a cute but not 9/10 looker because the other woman is sane.
Fathers: call you daughters and your wives on this.
Mothers: do not model this to your children. Yes you are moody. So. Is. He. Act like an adult and be civilized.
Men: if she cannot control your emotions on a date then... hasta la vista, babe.
From a female perspective:
ReplyDeleteI have experienced FH as well. I've done that a couple of times myself, but only when I was a crazy 15 year old. Mind you, that was a rather difficult period of life, so I was probably not mentally stable at that time.
I have also experienced other women who pull that crap, but as adults. I can tell you guys straight up: if she acts like that and especially if she's over the age of 18, GET THE F OUT!!!!! I can't stress that enough. Homegirl is nuts or has a bitchy entitlement attitude that you do NOT want to deal with over a long period of time. She will drain your soul.
Don't feel left out though, the crazies also do that to their female friends. I actually had it happen over the past weekend from my best friend. Needless to say, we will not be hanging out anymore.
Another thing that stuck with me...any problem you see with a woman in dating will be magnified 100 times when you marry them.
ReplyDeleteI also failed to mention some women like drama more than they like themselves or the people they're dating. It's a drug. Probably too much 90210
ReplyDeleteThen again to quote my genius 20 something self long ago:
"The why doesn't matter. All that matters is what is."
10 Reasons You Can’t Communicate with a Narcissistic or Borderline Woman
ReplyDeletehttp://shrink4men.wordpress.com/2009/09/17/10-reasons-you-cant-communicate-with-a-narcissistic-or-borderline-woman/
Another female perspective, from a biochemical point of view:
ReplyDeleteThere is how you feel, then there is how you act. They need not be the same thing -- and a smart woman knows how to act on her higher brain functions.
And, a real woman would have asked if she could grab you a soda while you filled up the gas tank -- which is what I always do when my husband gets gas.
Goddess facepalm!
"I've done that a couple of times myself, but only when I was a crazy 15 year old"
ReplyDeleteDon't beat yourself up, 15 year olds are almost uniformally,
a) unbearably stupid
or
b) horribly miserable because they're _not_ unbearably stupid.
No one expects sane behavior from 15 year olds. But hystericss (absent a valid cause like death of a loved one or surviving attempted murder) from an 18+ year old are inexcusable.
I'm not letting men off either.
They are partly to blame because most men will put up with way too much crap if a girl is pretty enough (as did the captain at one time).
Too many judge womens characters with their eyes (or fool themselves into thinking that women of character don't exist).
Rather than try for the hottest girl you can find (who is liable to not be sane because people have treated her like a freak for too long* and/or because keeping up peak hotness takes so much effort that her personality withers on the vine) lower the hotness standards a little (not completely but dial them back to something realistic) and invest in character.
*don't fool yourself into thinking your straight shooting will straighten her out, the bizarre enabling behavior from people around her have gone on for years and you're not going to overcome it
Beauty, intelligence, sanity.
ReplyDeletePick two.
Agreed with other people talking about Borderline PD.
ReplyDeleteIf its a one off it can be forgiven. If its consistent, then you need to get out.
The problem is that we try to look for patterns in the crazy, that there must be some reason why they act the way they do. There isn't.
Hysterical.
ReplyDeleteIt's just American women who are unstable. Also, not all of them are so, but only those who swallow the line that men and women are fundamentally different. Those women become very mentally unstable. However, if you want to take a look at the emotional instability of American men, look no further than up in this thread. There it is.
ReplyDeleteHey Aaron I'm curious if you've ever seen any of this guy's stuff before? Like this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4zSRkBMPng
ReplyDeleteJust want to know what your opinion is.