The End of Awards

It was last night the GF said unto me, "Cappy, let's get some dinner."  Preoccupied with taxes and mundane busy work, I said, "Fine.  Find a place and let's go."  And in about 10 minutes she had found a place - "Culinary Drop Out."

So off to the preppy parts of Scottsdale we went where upon entering the restaurant we both knew she had made a mistake.  For the restaurant was not so much a restaurant but a dog-rescue like non-profit where the last vestiges of hipsters, millennials, and people confused about their sexual identity were hired and provided a nice little preserve to live in (ironically...or perhaps not so ironically... in the most preppy, conformist part of Arizona).  It was bad enough I could not look at our server, who although nice and very good at her job, was so pierced, tattooed and poorly dressed, it ruined the dining experience.

We ordered quick.
Ate fast.
And got the hell out of there.

However, whilst waiting for our food I couldn't help but notice what was on two TV's that hung above the bar.  One TV was showing the X games, the other some "music awards ceremony."

One TV had snowboarders working amazing tricks on the half pipe.
The other had two aged baby boomer hippies playing guitars.

One had 20 somethings flipping snowmobiles off of jumps.
The other had some old washed up 60 somethings blathering on about some cause or another.

One had youth cheering on loudly as skiers did triple-lindys off a jump.
The other had middle-agers donned in tuxes and formal regalia, golf clapping at the latest award awarded to some person or another for some thing.

The two could not have been more juxtaposed and they highlighted an important lesson for everybody to learn about awards - they no longer mean anything.

After watching Bruno Mars (I can at least visually identify him) win "Best New Album" I finally broke down and looked up which award ceremony was being broadcasted on CBS and it turned out to be the "Grammy's."

At one time, when I was in single digits these ceremonies and awards might have meant something.  My mom would sit me down to watch Ms. America, which at least in theory celebrates beauty.  I recall watching the various "ammy's" because there was no cable, they had pomp and circumstance, and there wasn't much else to do that late in the evening for an 8 year old.  But the first hint I received that something was amiss and that these award ceremonies were absolutely pointless was when Jack Nicholson wasn't even nominated for his role as the Joker in Batman.

I didn't have much time to think about it soon after that because I would be shipped off to college soon thereafter and my consumption of pop culture would tank for the next 6 years.  But further bits of data and evidence would soon appear proving nearly every societal establishment, institution, guild, and pillar was corrupt and their "prestigious awards" completely pointless.

While in college Arafat won a Nobel Peace prize in 1994, which only echoed various UN nominations of dictators to human right's commissions and positions.  This was confirmed when a man who LITERALLY HAD NO REAL WORLD WORKING EXPERIENCE AND HADN'T DONE ANYTHING YET won the Nobel Peace Prize in 2009 - Barack Obama.  There was the fact I had a 3.96 but couldn't technically graduate with "honors" because I didn't spend enough time in extracurricular activities that included diversity, working with the poor, and other such political claptrap.  All of which was backdropped by now two decade's worth of "ammy" awards where skill and talent is rarely discussed, but speeches against BushHitlerTrumpIraqEtc., seemed to be all that mattered.  Stephen Colbert's hosting of one of these "ammy" awards recently, where all he did was obsess over Trump like a teenage girl, epitomized this.

But while the awards of our global institutions have been co-opted for blatant leftist political reasons, awards in nearly every aspect of American life have also become pointless.

For example take the self-inflicted sob story of arguably America's dumbest woman - Sarah Pool.  Among the story of self-inflicted ruination, Sarah holds up her 3.95 GPA in "English" as an accomplishment or prize, when in reality it doesn't take much to get a high GPA in the liberal arts and grad inflation is rampant.  Those hipsters working at the Culinary Dropout?  Merely representatives of the first generation of adults who had meaningless participation trophies, not to mention the elimination of GPA's and valedictorians in some of their schools.  And in what can only be described as the most perfect example of mental and ego masturbation the "Chicago Bird Collision Monitors Awards" which merely award awards to each other and is endemic among non-profits, academia, and CSR departments.

What is happening is very simple.  To actually achieve something noteworthy takes effort, rigor, sacrifice, thought, and time.  In short, you must pay a price, beyond financial, to do something noteworthy, let alone win a real award.  But with a softening of American resolve and a decay in the quality and caliber of Americans, more and more people want the benefits of the award without the actual achievement that would earn them one.  This is not only hypocritical, but insane, because I don't know how you can enjoy or take pride in an award when you did nothing to earn it.  This is epitomized in the vast number of various civilian awards, titles, and honors issued by the Soviet government to aggrandized themselves and legitimize communism even though there was nothing of genuine accomplishment to celebrate. The "donating blood" award was merely the Soviet's equivalent of a soccer mom's bumper sticker of "My Student is a Great Student and Dumfuck Elementary,"but in all honesty is more of an accomplishment than Barack Obama's Nobel Peace Prize.

The question is whether society realizes this or they fail to see past these formerly glorious institutions' past reputations.  Does little Johnny actually think he's "a great student" because his mommy (and every other students' mommies) have bumper stickers on their SUV's?  Does little Suzie with her 48 participation trophies think she's accomplished at anything?  Do all the graduate students in the liberal arts think they're education and not indoctrinated simply because they have an advanced degree in some leftist liberal arts slop?  And much as you may like him, you gotta know that Barack himself doesn't actually believe he deserved that Nobel Prize.

The good news is that even though I was in the hipster-rescue charity called "The Culinary Dropout," nobody was watching the Grammy awards.  They were more focused on the actual display of athletic excellence being portrayed on the X Games and not the washed up hippies playing their guitars and the nearly-dead golf-clapped them on as they no doubt called for more of other people's money to solve problems they really cared about.  I charter this more to the fact flipping snowmobiles is just more impressive and eye catching, but there is also salvation in the internet.  The internet has truly democratized media where CBS, the MSM, and large traditional institutions no longer have the pull they once did.  Not only because "the youth" today no longer watch TV and are instead glued to their cell phones, but the old dinosaur institutions that present awards are so far up their own asses and too busy blowing each other, they've lost touch with the younger generations and lost touch with what it means to be "excellence." Dragging Bono's ass up on stage thinking the 19-34's are going to watch him (yet again) lecture them about how they should feel guilty does not have the pull as to whether Shawn White is going to make that epic flip.  Having Madonna's wrinkly corpse up on stage lecture the 19-34 year olds is not as exciting as whether or not their post was liked on Facebook or Suzie Q is going to Snapchat a nudie pic to Bobby Joe.  It is the laziness, lack of genuine excellence, political corruption, and the alternatives the internet provides that has ended the value and ultimate meaning of the world's traditional awards. And thank god because they mean absolutely nothing.
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