Thursday, December 08, 2011

A Very Cappy Cap Christmas!

You probably have relatives or parents that are over 40 and were brought up in the "card giving days." You probably remember those days when at the age of 8 you were forced to sign a ton of cards for Christmas or somebody's birthday by your mother. Even at that age you wondered how the recipients of the card couldn't see through the forced signatures and see it was a simple ruse on the part of your mother, but you signed anyway.

Or perhaps today you have Gen Xer's that recently had children and have since disappeared from the face of the planet. You only see them now on Facebook, and wonder if they truly do exist at all.

Whichever the case, now is the time you will be receiving those lame "family Christmas cards" that nobody really asked for, nobody really cares about, and nobody really reads. If for any other reason you are going to see those people in the Christmas card in about 2 weeks and already KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON IN YOUR FAMILY,

or

the friends you used to have before the evils of children consumed them, denying them any more fun in their lives, keep having more and more children and you, frankly, can't keep up with them and so you lose interest. Mayhaps 18 years from now they can all go out once again and booze it up at the salsa club...at the age of 55.

Regardless, I thought to help contribute to the spirit of Christmas, I should send out my own Very Cappy Cap family Christmas card this year and update you about all the members in my family! I hope you like it!

6 comments:

  1. Anonymous7:42 PM

    Ah, the skimpy black bra hanging from the ceiling makes it all good.

    And a very Merry Christmas to you, sir.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous2:40 AM

    Christ man, you look depressed as hell.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous6:07 AM

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4SKL7f9n58
    Guess they knew all along.

    "
    When we grew up and went to school, there were certain teachers who would hurt the children anyway they could
    by pouring their derision upon anything we did
    exposing any weakness however carefully hidden by the kids.

    But in the town it was well known
    When they got home at night their fat and psychopathic wives
    Would thrash them within inches of their lives!"

    ReplyDelete
  4. I look depressed????

    What would I look like if I were happy!?

    Also, yeah, saw the bra after the pic was taken, figured it was worth keeping in the photo.

    ReplyDelete
  5. No offense Capt, but your body fat percentage looks pretty high in that picture... Are you following a high fat, low carb diet like any intelligent man?

    Looking forward to the new book!

    ReplyDelete
  6. No, I really just look fat in that picture. Last I checked at the gym I was 2.11 pounds per inch. Far away from fat.

    ReplyDelete