Don't Let Women Land You In Jail

She was screaming at the top of her lungs on I-35W southbound right at the intersection where I-94 intersected.

It was rush hour.

I had to make a move to make my exit to westbound 94.  I needed the entirety of my mental capacity and senses.

But she was so fanatical it impaired my ability to drive to the point it now was a serious threat to my safety which resulted in the only time in my life I made a physical threat to a woman.

"I will fucking beat the fucking shit out if you don't shut the fuck up right fucking now!"

I said it with more emphasis, sincerity and anger than what Blogger text formatting will allow, so please do believe me that I was a micrometer from punching this veritable child into a bloody pulp.  It was that bad, it was that serious, and I was that close from pulling over and just beating the ever living hell out of a Californian suburbanite princess.


But appreciate that statement.

I REALLY WAS a micrometer from beating the hell out of her.

I REALLY WAS so angry I would have not relented.

And had I just a mere brain cell or life-experience less or two, I would have followed through with that threat.  She'd be on the side of 35W, a twitching soon-to-be-quadriplegic corpse as I drove off happy to be rid of her.

Now ask yourself the question - what would the consequences have been?

Well, the consequences are quite obvious.

I would have been in jail and this vile woman would have been scot-free (albeit "twitchy").

Another interesting anecdote, and not unrelated either, she married a guy I knew and liked.  And while I feel sorry for him, he is the first guy to ever invite me to a party where I saw lines of cocaine lined up.  And while I had quite an amiable relationship with his young fellow, I can only imagine what would have happened had the cops busted down the door when everybody was snorting coke.

Now I could go on.

The time I sucker punched (unjustifiably so) a guy who took my gas station spot.
The time I taunted a guy at a bar for collecting welfare and living off of his dad for tuition.
The time I told a rowdy and drunk cowboy that the girl who was hitting on me wasn't his woman and I'd take her home if I damn well pleased.

There are many instances.

But every instance was a RAZOR SHARP instance and pure dumb luck that the dice didn't roll the other way, with me landing in jail with a criminal record, vs. the other way where I luckily find myself now.  And I say that with the most sincerity.  I should have a criminal record, but it was only by pure dumb luck I don't.

So you young men listen to my following wisdom.

1.  No girl is worth getting into legal trouble for.  I don't care what it takes to override your biological, Darwinistic predisposition, you NEED to learn to control your emotions when it comes to women.  This is the NUMBER ONE thing your brain is wired to vehemently react to.  You must learn to IDENTIFY IT  and CONTROL it. 

You find your girl sleeping with another man in your own bed.  You have a pistol on your person.  You MUST learn not to shoot the man in bed with your girl.  Because NOTHING good will come of you killing that man.

The (again, I use it rarely, but accurately) cunt is SCREAMING at the top of her lungs for some unjustifiable reason or another while you're driving on the interstate.  Do you pull over and beat the hell out of her, or do you take a deep breath, think things through, and in a very zen like fashion ignore her decibels, drive her home, drop her off, and never see her again as you pursue your own life?  Again, what are the consequences to succumbing to your darwinistic desires to pull over and beat her?

Jail.

Whatever the instance, you must have the adult, TRUE MAN, maturity to dismiss and ignore such drama and antics, side step such traps, and ensure you remain a free man, outside of the prison system so you can enjoy the finite life you've been graced with.

2.  Simply do not associate with even QUESTIONABLE people. 

I really don't believe that most people in jail are there because they were hardened criminals.  I believe many of them are there because they were innocent bystanders.  They had a tacit interest, their friend was being assaulted, their girlfriend needed her "honor" defended, whatever, they were the wrong man at the wrong place at the wrong time.

The key is to avoid such "wrong people" and such "wrong situations" from the get go. 

When it comes to the point cocaine lines are starting to show, you go.

When the jealous lawyer who is married (true story) starts to wine and dine your girl, you go.

When your friend needs you to lie for him to provide an alibi you go.

Your life is not meant to be wasted away in a 6 x 7 cell because you were hanging out with the wrong people, so just make sure you don't even associate with such people.

The larger point is that if you look at most people with criminal records or who end up in jail unjustifiably so, they all have one thing in common - they didn't have the good sense or self-respect to say, "You know what, these people I'm hanging out with are bad news.  And even though I'm a good guy/gal, their activities could get me in trouble.  Be it by association, drama, jealousy, rage, or foolish antics, it isn't worth it."

You need to learn to walk away and never associate yourself with such people in that it only will increase your chance of having a criminal record.