Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Everybody Needs An Asshole in Their Life

Because assholes are the only ones who will tell you the truth.

Ergo, consider hiring an asshole to consult you about;

your career
your education
your dating
your business, and
your life

Cheaper than a "real" consultant, and infinitely more honest.

Asshole Consulting, because we plain don't give a fuck about you...

which ironically means...

we care more than anybody else.

6 comments:

  1. Anonymous8:06 AM

    Better yet, just be an asshole yourself ...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think I'm going to take you up on it. How do you work with someone in an industry you might be unfamiliar with, say advertising or manufacturing?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous9:01 AM

    asshole 101 right here...
    http://chickentinders.com/

    ReplyDelete
  4. If you don't have an asshole, you fill with crap until you asplode.

    True story.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Johnny Caustic10:47 PM

    I would genuinely be really interested in a service where a socially acute person would spend a day or two getting to know me, then tell me straight what's wrong with me and what facets of my personality or looks are driving women away. In fact, I've been looking for such a service for two decades. But I've found only a couple of half-hearted attempts that gave me a few hints but ultimately couldn't sustain the directness or honesty.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous4:01 PM

    Hmmm … If I consult you at this time, it would be on how to be an even bigger asshole than I already am.

    ReplyDelete