Saturday, September 27, 2008

Last Words from Lehman Brothers

I teach a class on stock valuation and analysis and one of the exercises I put my students through is to go online and download an annual report of whichever company they like and quote the first sentence in the chairman's letter to the shareholders.

I then relate this to what I call the "Green Bay Packer Syndrome" wherein during my youth growing up in Wisconsin the Green Bay Packers would never, ever, ever win a super bowl, or for that matter a game. And true to form, when they finished the season 0-28, you could rely on Green Bay Packer fans like Obama to spend more money to say, "wait till next year." The same thing applies to ALL publicly traded companies. Doesn't matter that they lost billions. Doesn't matter their product kill 5,000 babies. Doesn't matter they're about to go bankrupt. With lying smiles on their faces they look straight into the camera and say, "Though we may have had some "slight" difficulties this year, we look at it as another opportunity to capitalize upon in our great tradition here at the XYZ Corporation."

Thus I thought it appropriate to post a screen shot of the overpaid, preppy blue blood schmucks, sitting in their hoity toity office at the now befallen piece of Bulge Bracket crap that is known as "Lehman Brothers."



I think I speak for America when I say, "Go ef yourselves!"

3 comments:

  1. For 3 summers in grad school I helped foreign MBA students learn English at a proverbial free lunch and by having them read Harvard Business Reviews.

    The remarkable thing to me was that the HBRs had 10 pages which said absolutely nothing of any informational value!

    In my first private sector job, conversations were rife with meaningless platitudes and slogans like 'going forward'. I'm so sick of that phrase, it almost makes me homicidal!

    Your class project demonstrates the classic principle-agent problem in corporate management. Economist Kevin Hallock showed that executive compensation actually is justified by marginal revenue product. I find it difficult to believe though that golden parachutes are all that necessary in competition for good CEOs. Not all CEOs are responsible for a business failing but it's clear here they screwed the pooch. Where is the company escape clause for mismanagement?

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  2. Anonymous1:11 AM

    I'm pretty sure someone Photoshopped those images on those monitors.

    Word verification: kipvel

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  3. Anonymous8:25 AM

    I'm a little surprised at the "envy" that shows when you talk about CEOs and such. Maybe they don't "deserve" salaries and bonuses as high as they get, but who can fault them for accepting the money when the Boards and Shareholders don't say no? That's capitalism, baby.

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