Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Victor Borge

I was 19 at the time. I had purchased TWO tickets, 4 months in advance to see Victor Borge in concert. It was the 7th row, dead center, the seats could not have been better.

There was just one minor problem.

It was 1994.

You see, in 1994 the "fad" of Gen X was the "grunge" fad where women dressed like men, men wore nylons on their arms, and everybody pierces everything. And while I thought I would have absolutely no problem finding a female counterpart for my extra ticket, little did I realize it would be such a Herculean task to find a girl from my generation WHO EVEN KNEW WHO VICTOR BORGE FREAKING WAS IN THE FIRST PLACE. My generation had no class. They were (and for the most part) still are, uncultured morons. They thought Kurt Cocaine was cool and the Doors were classic. I should have taken that as the hint as to not bothering to date girls until I was 27 and saved myself a lot of headache (and money).

And so, there I was, unacceptably having to EXPLAIN to girls who Victor Borge was, and not only that, but why they should be practically tripping over themselves to go with me. The sad end of the story was I had to take a girl that didn't know who he was, who was just a friend of mine as in 4 ENTIRE MONTHS I could not find a real date. But what is really sad is the fact I even had to try so hard to find a date for Victor Borge.

Victor of course has passed away now, but before society degrades itself into watching "American Idol" and voting for presidents based on their pecks 24-7, permit me to show you a little bit of Victor Borge so that we all might get a little bit of culture before we're dead;



Another little joke from Victor Borge;

"There is a mother and a daughter in the audience and one of them is celebrating her birthday. However, I am informed it is difficult to tell which one is the mother and which one is the daughter because both ladies, they look very old."

Trump that Simon Cowell.

5 comments:

  1. Anonymous8:22 AM

    Yeah, feminism had that effect.

    Not too many classy ladies who can even dress up for a night out.

    Of course, they will tell you that you are afraid of 'strong women'.

    Okay, just like I am afraid of strong B.O.

    All you feminists: Please stop mistaking my revulsion of you for fear of you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous8:31 AM

    "I'd like to thank my parents for making this night possible, and my children for making it necessary." - VB

    ReplyDelete
  3. I would have gone with you (I even knew who Victor Borge was). Granted, I was the one girl in college in the 90s who never went outside in pajamas, and actually wore lipstick and skirts.

    The feminists hated me more than they hated any man at school. I was the woman who *liked* dressing up and being a girl... my very existence made their arguments that women were forced to do these things in the past by the patriarchy all the more ridiculous. I clearly wasn't being 'forced' to dress up for class... in fact I was roundly mocked for it.

    I am still mad at the feminists for ruining a generation of men. All their harangues worked on most men. Because of that men are now either passive or they have given up on dating. I don't particularly blame them. I have given up on finding a stand up guy who doesn't think I want some sort of mythical 'equality' in a relationship. No - what I want is a relationship with an actual MAN... where I get to be a woman. I can have 'equality' with my girlfriends - I am looking for a complimentary relationship with my partner.

    ReplyDelete
  4. MTGirl3:08 PM

    Oh quit blaming the feminists for everything.

    Manners in general have gone down the tube and have been for some time. Dressing up on a date has nothing to do with feminism, it has to do with manners. (Unless this is some reference to the bra burning stuff that went on back in the 60's)

    I would personally describe myself as a stong woman, considering I managed to survive a 4 day elk hunt with my husband, brother, and brother-in-law without kicking anyone (I am not naturally good at hiking in full camo, a backpack, and a rifle, and hate being glared at when I ask such inane questions such as "are we going over the hill or around it?"), but I still make a point of dressing nice for weddings, funerals, and dates. I will admit I still suck at lipstick though. It always makes me look like a vampire who just ate a pink popsicle.

    AND, I would point out that the whole dressing thing goes both ways. It's hard to keep wearing dresses when it requires an act of congress to get men to wear a shirt with BUTTONS! "Lets see, it's a funeral for my grandfather....I imagine this 'No
    Fear' t-shirt will be just fine since it's a dark color. Yeah, that'll be good! Ooh, and I have a pair of clean jeans too!"

    Anyway, Capt, I hope you are having better luck with the younger gals these days. And I hope you are still wearing buttoned shirts to nice events.

    ReplyDelete
  5. He missed one:

    "Let's get [three] it."

    That was funnier hearing it that when I read it elsewhere. Thanks for the video.

    It would be interesting to understand how the subtitles captured all that since few of those words would have "number" sounds in them in a different language.

    Were the subtitles in Danish?

    ReplyDelete