1. Stay in shape
2. Drop the psychoses you think are defensive mechanisms or "cute" ways to entertain yourself and be a mature adult.
3. Support yourself
4. Cook
You do those four SIMPLE things and you will be in the top 1% of women.
i would 2nd long hair, no man likes being with a woman that could be mistaken for a guy from behind.
and how about some traditional and/or religious values. they only seem to be the stuff that keeps families and societies going strong, seems a no brainer why guys are looking to stay with women like mom for more than one night.
#3 should be "Support yourself, but make it clear that you have a job, not a career."
#5 Learn to play the piano. For two centuries this has been a favorite way for young ladies to signal marriageability -- it shows intelligence, diligence, manual dexterity, and femininity. And unlike e.g. calculus, you need not be an expert to recognize one; a pianist's level of mastery is obvious even to the untrained ear.
I would say, "bake" rather than "cook". Many men are good at cooking - especially grilling steaks or roasting meat. My stepdaughter, who is skilled in the management of her boyfriend, has a pleasant personality, long dark hair, and her cherry cake is to die for. Her boyfriend is good with meat.
Well, that's a pretty good list I guess but you're sort of answering a question that no one is asking. No woman has ever asked me "how can I be a better girlfriend?"
Long hair, stay thin, sex anytime, shut up.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much for the linkage, Captain!
ReplyDeleteWhat about living in my mom's basement? Is that not a powerful aphrodisiac that says "pick me, pick me"??
ReplyDeletei would 2nd long hair, no man likes being with a woman that could be mistaken for a guy from behind.
ReplyDeleteand how about some traditional and/or religious values. they only seem to be the stuff that keeps families and societies going strong, seems a no brainer why guys are looking to stay with women like mom for more than one night.
Tweet this so I can re-tweet it, Captain
ReplyDelete#3 should be "Support yourself, but make it clear that you have a job, not a career."
ReplyDelete#5 Learn to play the piano. For two centuries this has been a favorite way for young ladies to signal marriageability -- it shows intelligence, diligence, manual dexterity, and femininity. And unlike e.g. calculus, you need not be an expert to recognize one; a pianist's level of mastery is obvious even to the untrained ear.
Well, Tiff, when you're a fat ugly slag that can't cook I suppose you have to take what you get.
ReplyDeleteI would say, "bake" rather than "cook". Many men are good at cooking - especially grilling steaks or roasting meat. My stepdaughter, who is skilled in the management of her boyfriend, has a pleasant personality, long dark hair, and her cherry cake is to die for. Her boyfriend is good with meat.
ReplyDeleteYou really need to add:
ReplyDeleteKeep body mutilations to a minimum.
And also, as others have mentioned, at least shoulder length hair.
Cap, when is your next cook-book coming out?
ReplyDeleteWell, that's a pretty good list I guess but you're sort of answering a question that no one is asking. No woman has ever asked me "how can I be a better girlfriend?"
ReplyDelete