Saturday, March 28, 2020

Hundreds of Journalist Are Being Laid Off, Right When the Public Needs Them the Most

Dear Journalists and Journalism Majors,

In light of the recent layoffs in your "profession" I think you need to know where your place in this world is, especially given the state of journalism these past few decades.

You are completely unnecessary. 
You are not "critical" to the economy, let alone society.
The vast majority of you are lazy adult children who didn't want to try hard in college, but had the added flaw of being arrogant enough at 17 years of age to think you knew better AND other people should listen to you.
You are propagandists.
Liars.
Political pawns.
Yellow journalists.
Brown journalists.
The scum of the Earth.

The average citizen with the freedom of speech and an internet connect is a drastically superior journalist, as well as human being to you.

Please FOAD.  You offer nothing of value to society.  You are worthless human beings.

Sincerely,

People with Real Jobs Who Work for a Living

Friday, March 27, 2020

Johnny Depp Strikes Back

Oh nosies!  Pretty girls are subject to the laws of the land.

What Every Gen Z Woman Must Learn from Millennial Women

This is an excerpt from the book "How Not to Become a Millennial."  Of it's many intents, one of the primary ones is to use older generations (namely, the Millennials) to serve as a warning to younger, future generations on how to avoid becoming like them.  And while it focuses on things like finances, avoiding stupid degrees, avoiding stupid religions/ideologies, etc., this particular excerpt focuses on young women and how they are targeted by society.

The problem in trying to warn young women is that they are impervious to bad news, no matter how reasoned or real.  And the reason why is society tells them lies that are just much much MUCH sweeter tasting than truth.  So even though they are about to walk into a trap and end up lonely and miserable like their Gen X and Millennial sisters, the lies they've been told are too sweet, too many, and too consistent for them to WANT to believe anything else.

But for what handful of young women are open-minded enough to read this excerpt, I merely ask you to read through the bolded part below which I surmise will compel you to read the rest.  You needn't real the whole thing, just the bolded part at the beginning.  And if that doesn't convince you or that this is just an old foolish man who doesn't know what he's talking about, fine.  You may dismiss this article for what it is and continue on your merry way to a liberal arts college.

But for the few of you who do realize the threats to your future are real and are described in detail below, I strongly recommend you buy and read the whole book as young women ARE being set up like cattle to the slaughter.  They are being scammed.  They are being drained of all their youth, time, beauty, and money.  And it is most definitely in your best interests to be aware of the people who are trying to ruin your life.

Thank you for your open-mindedness and critical thinking.

There’s just one minor problem. 

Believing you’re a victim when you’re not or thinking your gender has some kind of intrinsic value when it doesn’t are both living lies.  And there’s an entire industry only more than happy to indulge women in these beliefs.  We already addressed this industry as the “Lying Industrial Complex.”  But within this overall industry are companies, governments, institutions, and other entities that just focus on selling lies to women, resulting in a metaphorical “Vagina Industrial Complex.”  And there’s a good reason they focus on women.  They are the single biggest market for lies.

Women make up half the population.  They end up with most of the wealth when their husbands die.  They account for 58% of college students.  They either make or influence 75% of consumer spending.  They make up half the voting population.  And the other half desperately wants them.  But above all else, they are the biggest consumer of lies buying anything from “big is beautiful” to Harlequin romance novels to push-up bras to liberal arts degrees.  And if you can convince them they’re both oppressed and have value simply because of their plumbing, they will pay you a pretty price.

Any by “pretty price” I mean “everything they have in life.”

Here, young women really need to pay attention, especially if they wish to avoid the fate of their Millennial and Gen X sisters.  Because while it may look like this entire world was built for them, with every institution in American cheering and encouraging women on, the opposite in fact is often true.  Nearly every institution that claims to be on “Team Woman” is usually trying to extract as much money out of women as possible.  Every entity that claims to want to help “the plight of women” is usually trying to make a buck in the process.  Thus, many young American women would do themselves an incredible financial service if they viewed themselves as being sent down an assembly line.  But instead of being built up like a car, they are being slowly stripped away of all their time, money, value, and worth, leaving them with nothing in life.  And harsh as that may sound, it’s true.

Starting at the age of five the “Vagina Industrial Complex” wastes no time grooming young girls into becoming livestock they can butcher later. They immediately start laying down an incredible infrastructure where young girls are indoctrinated to think they have value - while at the same time are being oppressed - because they have a vagina.  This brainwashing/infrastructure also critically forces these girls to put their educations and careers first in life, ahead of all other things, especially love.  Closely related, young girls are then told they do not need men, and are once again instilled with the “competitors at best, enemies at worst” view of men.  These young girls are also programmed to believe “they can have it all” including things like winning the “Dream Job Lottery” and “following your heart and the money will follow” type of propaganda, entrenching entitlement in their minds.  And so what may have started out as an innocent little five year old girl, is now a completely programmed automaton at 18 that is going to go to serve the “Vagina Industrial Complex” for the rest of her life. 

This is made very clear by the very first action most women take in their adult lives – they go into unrepayable levels of debt so they can enjoy “The College Experience.”

This is such a critical point in young women’s lives because it not only sets the tone for the rest of their days, but makes it very clear that their role in life is to be a slave to “The Vagina Industrial Complex.”  These poor girls don’t even have a penny saved up, yet their first action is to borrow $150,000 and give it to The Vagina Industrial Complex via its Big Education subsidiary.  And in exchange the majority of these poor girls are given a worthless piece of paper that offers no hope in helping them ever pay off their debts.  It will take at least until they are 35 to get out of this financial hole they dug for themselves.  But the professors and college admin within The Vagina Industrial Complex don’t care, as they have already made off with the money. 

But duping young, naïve women out of $150,000 fresh out of the gate is only one of the intended goals of The Vagina Industrial Complex.  They have an ulterior and secondary motive in making women (and men) financially destitute, as well as unskilled.  Because being talentless and financially crippled makes you desperate.  And being desperate makes you willing to work for lower wages.  This benefits the next institution young women will face within The Vagina Industrial Complex - employers. 


Employers love desperate, financially crippled employees because beggars can’t be choosers.  Employers can get away with paying financially desperate people a lower wage than somebody with a degree in engineering who has four offers on the table.  This increases their profits by trillions and is one of several reasons median wages have remained stagnant in the past 40 years.  It is also one of the main reasons the wage gap exists.  You might ask, “Well wouldn’t women return to school to get a good degree or a trade?” But remember, The Vagina Industrial Complex has thoroughly sold women on the lie they’re being oppressed and discriminated against, not that they chose a poor field.  Furthermore, they also sold women on the lie they’re entitled to work in a field they’re “passionate about.”  These two lies damn women to slave away at sub-par wages for decades, often times their entire lives, cumulatively providing trillions in lower labor costs to the corporate sector of The Vagina Industrial Complex.

Still, corporations aren’t done sucking the blood out of women yet because even though women may be drowning in debt, that doesn’t mean they can’t be squeezed for even more.  Women do make money.  They do have salaries.  Plus the banking sector within The Vagina Industrial Complex is nothing but eager to lend these women money at very profitable rates on those salaries.  All of which can be spent on consumer spending, further increasing corporate profits.  And who cares if this additional debt enslaves women for the rest of their lives?  According to their programming they were entitled to “have it all.”  And besides, “YOLOammirite?”

Here you really have to applaud the corporate sector within The Vagina Industrial Complex for just what a brilliant job they’ve done convincing young women to part with their money.  Prada handbags, Jimmy Chew shoes, expensive uptown flats, $12 flirtinis, master’s degrees.  They’ve done a masterful job marketing a lifestyle that manages to squeeze every possible dime out of a woman’s salary, and more when she borrows at 24% APR on her credit card.  But what this effectively does is merely extend the time women are enslaved to The Vagina Industrial Complex through debt. If women really wanted to, they could work two jobs, live at home, and have their student loans easily paid off before they turn 27.  But if that happened they wouldn’t be paying billions in interest on debts they wouldn’t have.  Furthermore, they might discover frugality and fiscal discipline, which would be a death knell to the corporate sector.  The Vagina Industrial Complex needs girls perpetually behind the financial 8 ball buying SUV’s, “this year’s clothes,” fancy dinners, nights on the town, and master’s degrees, because if they don’t then “Tina” might have a nicer hangbag than “Amy” and “Madison” will have her master’s degree while “Ashley” doesn’t!  And we just can’t have that now can we?

Then there is the sad issue of timing.  By the time a young woman is in her mid-to-late 20’s she will have been a slave to The Vagina Industrial Complex for quite some time and will have the debts to show for it.  She will have a car loan, student loans, more student loans (from the master’s degree of course), and a significant amount of credit card debt.  But none of this changes biology.  Women will inevitably want to get married and have kids.  But being so in debt, having invested so much in their career and education, and being told those were the most important things in life, many women will be neither able or willing to be a mom or a wife. 

But do not fear, another sector within The Vagina Industrial Complex is here to help. The government.

The government loves indebted women on multiple levels.  Socialist parties within the western world love indebted women because they reliably vote for larger government.  The government loves indebted women because they have to work to pay for all their spending.  In this case the government gets a twofer because they get to tax all the money women make via income taxes, but also get to tax all the money women spend via sales taxes.  There is no better friend to the government than an individual who is in debt and lives paycheck to paycheck.  But there is a third and more clandestine reason the government loves indebted women, especially those successfully indoctrinated by The Vagina Industrial Complex – should they have kids they outsource motherhood to the government.

Women are already on the financial ropes by the time they reach their late 20’s that they simply do not have the time to raise their own children.  And since they were successfully convinced their career and education was more important than their children, they don’t even think twice about outsourcing their children to daycare.  But in doing so mothers set forth a chain of events that greatly benefit the government at the expense of, well, all of us.

First, if you’re not going to raise your own children then you’re going to have to pay someone else to.  This merely makes motherhood a taxable activity now that a transaction has been made to pay a daycare operator or nanny to be the mom for you.  If a mom (or dad) stays at home, makes their kids lunch, or changes a diaper, that is a free (though inglorious) labor of love that is not taxable.  But if you pay a third party to do the same, that transaction is taxable and the government very much appreciates that revenue.

Second, in outsourcing motherhood, you are still plugged into The Matrix, providing your employer labor at subpar wages and paying taxes to the government.  Nothing was saved in outsourcing your children, no efficiency was gained.  You just had to pay more money to daycare so you could continue to have “the privilege” to work and pay taxes.  You are still just as enslaved to the government and employer sectors of The Vagina Industrial Complex as you were before, even more so now that you have to scratch up the funds to pay for daycare.

Third, daycare provides a wonderful political football for politicians.  Even though your children are not other people’s responsibility, socialist politicians can easily bribe parents to vote for them by offering “free” government daycare.  Governments can also offer what is in essence government daycare in the form of “preschool” or “pre-K” type programs, which once again, only generates more revenue for the state.

Fourth, with a captive audience of abandoned children, the government has no problems getting an early start on indoctrinating those young children with the same pro-government propaganda they did you. Socialist parties have absolutely no moral qualms about brainwashing young children into socialist politics because it is critical to their long term political survival.  If they can get children predisposed to believe the lies of “they can have it all” and their own political religion, they will have a generation of voters for life.  Remember, none of this money-making racket would have been possible if you yourself weren’t duped into thinking you could have it all, “arbeit uber alles,” career/education > children, and “you can’t put a price on education.”     

Finally, given how expensive daycare is, an estimated 30-50% of mothers (depending on the statistics you want to use) would come out financially ahead if they decided to quit their jobs today and raise their own children.  In other words, a third to half of mothers today are working for no damn reason, except perhaps the programming they received to robotically pursue a career.  Of course, The Vagina Industrial Complex is not going to tout those figures, as they’d lose half their slave labor, but they may not have to as they’ve done such a brilliant job convincing people their careers come first and at the expense of everything else.

When it’s all said and done, the mere act of outsourcing your children comes at a high price. It submits them to the same indoctrination and programming you received as a child, arguably condemning them to the same slavery you endured under The Vagina Industrial Complex.  It estranges children from their parents, leading to many of the same mental problems plaguing Millennials today.  But the real price paid is that you don’t get to raise your children.  You don’t get to enjoy motherhood.  You had children.  But you were never a mother.

Admittedly, it’s debatable as to whether “deep down inside” mothers today love their children more than their careers.  And we can go into the academic debate about how actions are all that matters as that is the effective reality their children get to face.  But though anecdotal, I think the truth can be found when you get women at a rare moment of both honesty and inebriation.  Where they inevitably confess that “deep down inside” they wanted nothing more than to stay at home and raise children.  Because you never hear the opposite from an inebriated stay at home mom saying all she wanted in life was “to work a corporate gig, commute, and pay taxes.”  Regardless, the point is moot in that a decision has already been made.

The last stop on “The Vagina Industrial Complex Express” is one made possible by advances in medical technology.  With millions of Gen X and Millennial women committing themselves to their careers, many simply haven’t had the time to find “Mr. Right” and start a family.  Besides, with increasing demands for advanced degrees and the student debt that comes with it, most young women today don’t really hit their stride until they’re in their 30’s.  Unfortunately, this forces women into a race against their biological clock as they stare down menopause and complicated pregnancies just a short decade away.  But there is a solution allowing women to continue their career until they finally find Mr. Right without having to worry about menopause.  They can freeze their eggs.

Demand for freezing eggs has skyrocketed as it’s become an option for women for whom the time or the man is not right.  Year over year growth in the $4 billion industry is estimated to be at 25%.  Some of the more progressive employers offer it as a benefit for their female employees.  And it’s become so popular among some women there are even “egg freezing parties.”  But just like everything else promised by The Vagina Industrial Complex, there is a lie embedded within.

If you have become so desperate that you need to freeze your eggs, it may in fact already be too late.  Since the process of freezing eggs is in its earlier stages of development, it is fraught with problems, making it more of a lottery ticket than an insurance policy.  Only 4-14% of eggs end up in a live birth.  Half the eggs don’t survive the thawing process.   Each egg only lasts 5-10 years.  The quality of your eggs varies depending on your age.  Even risks unrelated to health play a role as two major egg banks malfunctioned, destroying all the eggs in the banks.  And while this industry is still evolving (and thus these statistics will change), the best statistics today show only 1 in 5 women who froze their eggs ended up becoming a mother.

This misleads many young women into thinking they have some kind of nuclear option where they can have a kid anytime at any age.  That they can “just freeze their eggs” and they’ve somehow cheated biology.  When in reality having the option to freeze your eggs lulls women into having a false sense of security, making them lackadaisical when it comes to finding a man and starting a family.  And all of that is on the shaky back of something that only has a 20% chance of success. 

But what’s even worse about the ability to freeze one’s eggs is that it glosses over the question - how did society get so desperate we’re starting to bump into the hard limits of human biology?  Isn’t there something wrong with our society when our economic, labor, and social policies are no longer conducive to human nature? Isn’t nature trying to tell us something?  And are we forever going to rely on medical technology to bail us out of these decisions?

The truth is this.

Women are best suited biologically to have children in their late teens and early 20’s.  And if they want to have children they better dedicate a significant percent of their time vetting quality men for being potential suitors, not getting “Master’s Degrees in Gender Studies.”  They also better capitalize on their youth and beauty to attract a man as that is the number one thing men look for in a woman, whether you like it or not.  And all of the 30/40/50 something women today who froze their eggs and are punting that “someday” they’ll find their own George Clooney have wasted their time, youth, and beauty.  They are statistically unlikely to find the love of their life.  It’s statistically over for them.  This is why 50% of women who inevitably do retrieve their eggs to get pregnant do so solo as they couldn’t find any man who wanted them.

Naturally, none of that plays well with the official narrative of The Vagina Industrial Complex (no matter how true it is).  And naturally, The Vagina Industrial Complex will continue to promote the “freedom and equality” that comes with having one’s eggs frozen.  But remember this.  As you’re forking over the $32,000 for two rounds of egg extraction and the $1,000 a month in storage costs it takes to store your eggs, there’s only a 1 in 5 chance you will have a kid and thus “have it all.”  Had you just put humans first in life instead of your career, you actually could have had it all.

“The Husk”

Once the Vagina Industrial Complex is done extracting all of your youth, money, time, and labor out of you, it no longer has any use for you.  You paid for a worthless college degree (and thrice its price in interest) all so you could enrich Big Education.  You slaved your entire life away for a corporation all so you could enrich Corporate America and the government.  You spent all your money on shoes, travel, and handbags (and once again thrice its price in interest) enriching the banks.  You outsourced your children, further enriching the government and ensuring a future generation of children would be equally duped.  And if you didn’t have children, you spent one last final $50,000 on a 20% chance you’d end up with a child, with only a 50% chance they’d have a father around.  After that at best you’ll have a good career, and there’s nothing wrong with that.  But without other humans in your life you will end up like everybody else does in life - old, unattractive, lonely, and nobody wanting anything to do with you anymore. Only your country’s socialist party might pay you a visit in the hopes to bribe you to vote for them with other people’s money.  But beyond that you have no point or purpose.  This is the result of playing the gender victimhood racket.  This is the terminus of placing ultimate value in a trait you were born with and not other humans.  In thinking you could “have it all” you ended up with nothing.

Young women today need to look at their “true believer” Millennial, Gen X, and even Baby Boomer sisters and ask themselves two very important questions.  One philosophical and the other practical.

Philosophically, do you really think gender has any value?  That a trait you were born with somehow holds intrinsic value?  And if you have this gender is it morally right of you to claim to be a victim because of it?  That you are entitled to things and other people’s money because of a trait you were born with?  Or should it be who you are, what you do, and what you accomplish in life that determines the quality and caliber of a person you are?

Practically, is there any advantage in placing value in one’s gender?  And is there any advantage in playing the gender victimhood racket?  If debt-laden, impoverished Millennial, Gen X, and Boomer women are any indication, and the true believers and followers of The Vagina Industrial Complex are any proof, placing value in your gender is a recipe for disaster.  It’s a guaranteed way to destroy your life and end it in loneliness and misery.  Admittedly, as a young person it’s hard to have the independent thought and critical thinking skills to counter the complete and total brainwashing everybody receives in school.  The K-college education system will do everything in its power to convince you to place value on your gender and to claim you’re a victim.  But younger generations of women really need to look at the depleted husks of feminist Gen X, Boomer, and soon-to-be Millennial women and ask themselves if they want to go down that path and end up the same.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B084QKMZTJ/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=B084QKMZTJ&linkCode=as2&tag=captaicapit0b-20&linkId=fa8e349e2314b3e2c45028a86af0344f

Good Morning Coronachan LIVE! 12:15PM CST!

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Thursday, March 26, 2020

How You Can Profit During the Quarantine


With a captive audience, you can expect journalists to force some of their worst ideas and worst writing on you in the next coming days.  A lot of it is going to come in the form of advice columns...advice being peddled by know-nothing, inexperienced 25 year old liberal arts majors who think they know everything.  This schlock is not only going to be painful, but common sense, as anybody with any experience or logic will deduce these things for themselves (did you know to wash your hands, btw?).  And so taking up the leisure of reading during the quarantine will prove more like navigating a mine field instead of anything practical, instructional, or stimulating.

But never fear, Cappy is hear, and with some non-schlocky advice that will make your days under quarantine very productive.  And not only productive, but likely set your trajectory in life higher than what you were operating at before.  Because while America's finest journalism majors will be telling you to "start a puzzle," "have game night," and "wash your hands," Cappy has some ideas that will drastically improve your finances, legal security, and overall life that when this idiocy ends, you'll re-enter life much better equipped than when it started.

The general overall principle is one based on the fact that there are infrastructural things in one's life that are always in need of retooling, repair, or upgrading.  No different than a company whose assembly line could be upgraded, trucks repaired, or employees trained in a new program, the same goes for individuals as there is always this back office or overhead work that can and should be done.  But like businesses, there just isn't the time.  The day to day operations of the firm keep the assets and employees completely employed, with rarely the time to stop, take a breath, and rethink/retool how things are done to make the entity much more efficient overall.  But with the Great and Merciful Coronachan forcing this down time on us, we as individuals (and businesses) have an amazing opportunity that should not be squandered on "puzzles" or "having game night," but instead should be invested in popping the hood, getting underneath the engine, and improving our engine of life so that when it's time to go back out on the line, we are much better prepared, much more efficient, and much more profitable.

Legal

Perhaps the most neglected aspect of people's lives is their legal life.  This makes sense because you're not likely to die when you're young, so like investing, you postpone it until death is on your door.  But with nothing better to do now, you might as well tackle this beast and get it done and over with.

Living wills and regular wills are the obvious items on your legal to do list.  But what about prenuptial agreements?  Trusts?  LLC's? And other forms of asset protection?  You spend a lot of time making money, but how much time have you spent protecting the money from ex's, spouses, law suits, even the government?  It's worth the time to talk to your CPA and a lawyer about setting up these asset protecting entities so an jealous ex or Ocasio Cortez can't steal your life's work.

Financial

Closely related to legal issues, are financial issues.  In short, do you have your financial house in order?  And of course the answer is you do not.  I know that the majority of Americans are idiots and live paycheck to pay check.  We're not even in this quarantine 2 weeks and half the population is applying for unemployment as they have no emergency savings.  But my readers are - to be perfectly honest - superior than the normie, conformie, inferior slop that majors in dumb shit, goes $150,000 into debt for it, and then works retail demanding a student loan bail out.  So for my readers, you're better than this, start getting your financial house in order.

This primarily entails setting up AND CONTRIBUTING TO a retirement plan.  If you don't have a 401k/403b/457 plan at work, you'll need to set up an IRA account on your own (I recommend Betterment.com).  This also means getting your personal budget in order so that there's enough money each month left over to fund a monthly contribution to this account.  And furthermore, the Great and Merciful Coronachan has cut stock prices by 1/3rd, and arguably into the foreseeable future, which is one of the brighter silver linings to this idiot-panic.

But there are other aspects of one's personal finances that should also be tended to while we have this downtime.  Specifically crypto-currency and precious metals.

Tedious and boring as these things may be, everybody should have some precious metals and a token amount of cryptocurrency as part of their overall financial portfolio.  I've always recommended 200 ounces of silver per person, but cyrptocurrency is so volatile I haven't been able to estimate an amount yet that I'd recommend for a portfolio (though, a couple thousand dollars is kind of the ball park I'm estimating at).  Regardless, buying silver is a chore (you can do so here), but buying cryptocurrency is a royal pain in the ass.  It not only takes an inordinate amount of time to buy it, but to study it and learn how to invest in it, takes time as well.  That is going to be at least a day's long chore, and one you should probably get to doing to shore up and insure your personal finances.

Capital Assets

While you're socking money away for retirement, there is another financial move that can prove to be just as helpful and financially profitable as investing for retirement - purchasing "capital assets" - aka - "big ticket items."

Housing
Cars
Land
Motorcycles
Phones
Furniture
Computers
Re-doing the kitchen

Any large ticket item that usually accounts for the lion's share of your personal budget.

Though not as "sexy" as investing in a 401k (which isn't all that sexy to begin with), it can have just as much of a financial effect as prudent investing in that buying your most expensive items in life when they're on fire-sale because of a recession can save you hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Right now there are MILLIONS of posers, frauds, and fakes living paycheck to paycheck who can only afford their McMansions, SUV's, and luxury kitchens because they lease and rent these luxury items.  ALL of their paycheck goes to making wifey poo look (not be) LOOK rich, while Chuck-The Cuck-Hubster drives his $60,000 brand new truck to the office...well, that was until he was laid off.  These big ticket items have not hit the market yet, but they soon will once the bank repossesses them.  And when they do, they will be marked 40%, 50%, maybe even 70% off as either they or the banks who repossessed those assets are desperate to raise cash to make ends meet.

This means you can pick up a very nice McMansion house for potentially under $300,000.
A nice, practically new car, for under $10,000 (or reasonable lease rates).
Daddy's little princess might have to hock her iPhone 975 to pay for tuition (because Daddy got laid off)
And construction workers/home builders/contractors will be so desperate they not only will lower their price, but show up on time AND SOBER!

Even the ole Captain is keeping his eye out for collectibles that he otherwise would never afford himself (an old classic Mustang and a 1909 S VDB wheat penny is in his sites) as Boomer collectors have very nice cars, but not enough money in their retirement accounts to afford rent.  But all of this assumes you are part of the superior race of humans who spent less than they made, saved up some money, and didn't live pay check to pay check.

Repair and Upgrade Your Physical Assets

With this downtime it's about time to maintain, repair, and upgrade whatever capital assets you have.  Every home owner knows there's at least a handful of repairs and upgrades that can be done to their house.  And with the economy in recession, the materials of which to do their home projects are cheaper than they would be before.  Therefore you have no excuse to not run down to Home Depot and get to work on these projects as it maintains and enhances the value of your largest asset.

Cars are the same where with a little bit of fatherly instruction YouTube videos and a set of tools you can spend an afternoon making your car last several more years, saving thousands in the process.

Even upgrading or doing the basic maintenance on a computer can save you money, but also teach you a new skill.  Either saving you money in the future from having to take the computer to "Geek Squad," or perhaps putting you onto a new career in life that could prove more profitable than the one you have.

Overseas Reconnaissance

Though travel is more or less banned, when the quarantine is lifted, that doesn't mean the economy is going to come roaring back immediately and you'll be hired back at the office.  There will likely be a recovery period where employers slowly fire back up the engines and travel is allowed once again.  But that is the perfect time to start traveling and reconnoiter this world to at minimum visit foreign places, but also determine if there might be a place you'd like to move to.

Without going into a long and boring econo-poli argument, there might be some reasons you don't trust your government or it's socialist finances (or, say, they completely overreacted to a virus that turned out to be no worse than the flu - you never know!).  You may not think your assets are protected here and with increasing percentages of countries' populations turning more socialist/parasitic, you might want to find a country that doesn't hate you, doesn't steal your money, and is OK just leaving you be on a beach. 

But that takes time, effort, reconnaissance, and money.  Good thing tickets, hotels, and car rentals are dirt cheap.

But while you're out gallivanting about, also spend the time getting another passport from another country (a long and arduous process), finding a place to have an overseas bank account (the same), and familiarize yourself more with the customs and legalities of living in different countries than you do their beaches and bars.  Like silver or cryptocurrency, having an insurance policy against communism and parasitism is a good idea.  Have a life raft at the ready for your residency just the same.

Skill Up

Cooking is being forced upon everybody as we are no longer allowed to outsource that vital task to our much-missed chefs and cooks in America.  But there's nothing wrong with learning to cook, as there is nothing wrong with learning any other skills you might have had an interest in.

Here the world is your oyster as any skill can be self-taught using the internet.  Be it ballroom dancing, karate, cooking, sewing, even more practical skills such as programming or auto-repair, you can not only learn these skills, but you have the ability to master them quickly, where dividends would be paid out immediately, perhaps even you landing a job once this idiot-panic ends.

This is perhaps one of the best uses of this downtime because if you can teach yourself a new skill, get certified online with whatever certifications help in your profession, even attending accredited colleges online to earn a degree, you are investing in a life-long skill that will increase your life-time earning potential making the decades to come much, much easier.  So though you may *want* to learn to crochet, perhaps learning Python is a better use of your time.

Life's Works

Everybody wants to produce one great life "work" before they die.  It could be a painting, a book, a program, or an album.  But the truth is most people are lazy and at best approach their life's work like Brian in Family Guy did his book "Faster Than the Speed of Love."

Don't be like normal people.  Be superior.  You have this one time where you are FORCED to stay at home and do nothing.  If you channel all your efforts into whatever book, painting, or project you always wanted to do, it could be done in 2-3 months.  My 500 page book "Bachelor Pad Economics" was written in 3 months time as I was forced to sit 16 hours a day in a solitary room while working security.  You are metaphorically being forced to do the same.  Channel the time and boredom into an intense focus that will result in your magnum opus.

Entrepreneurship

Related to life's work, if you had an idea for a business, now is the time to do it.  Not only are assets cheaper and you'll have the time, you might even be able to find funding from the government as we've decided we're going to print trillions of dollars that will *save us* from a virus.  It could be something as simple as a podcast or youtube channel you wanted to start.  Perhaps it's some software you wanted to program.  Maybe it's just setting up an accountancy online.  Whatever it is, you will NEVER have an opportunity like this ever again to pursue your entrepreneurial dreams.  Capitalize on it now, because soon you'll be back at the office, back at the factory, and back to wasting hours in a rush hour commute.

Reading

Though I don't personally understand it, there are some of you weirdos out there who like sitting in one physical spot for long periods of time doing nothing but...reading.

You not doubt have your list of books you'd like to read.  You are probably even excited to finally have the time to delve into and digest these great works of literature.  And I cannot understand for the life of me why you would read books like the Lord of the Rings or Atlas Shrugged when there are movies made of them.  But if you're going to read, can you at least read some books that are going to help your finances, investments, education, and overall life?  Specifically mine?

I know you want to read The Vagina Porn Show a la 50 Shades of Grey.  I know you want to read The Wizard Kids Who Hits Puberty a la Harry Potter.  But as the overall point of this article is to advocate you capitalize on this rare down-time opportunity and invest in your long term future, getting your financial house in order, improving your skill set, drastically increasing the wages you command, and aiming for early retirement as infinitely more valuable than reading "The Wizard Boy Hit Puberty" pentalogy.  Therefore, I strongly recommend the following books:

Poor Richard's Retirement
Bachelor Pad Economics
Worthless
Reconnaissance Man

Besides, look how cool this cover is. 

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1494463180/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1494463180&linkCode=as2&tag=captaicapit0b-20&linkId=QTM5OYMWOORSUEQQ

How CAN'T YOU BUY IT!!??  Besides, it's better than that 50-Shades-of-Chick-Porn you girls are shamelessly reading.  At least assuage some of that guilt by having an IRA account set up by the time this Corona stuff is over with.

Vasectomies

And finally vasectomies.

You may have a brow raised, wondering why vasectomies would make the "to do list" during the quarantine, but vasectomies are incredibly important to improving one's life as it insures individual men against poverty and is the number one thing we can do to eliminate poverty society wide.

Politically impolite as it is to say this, the number one cause of poverty in the world is children people can't afford.  It immediately lowers the various "per capita" measure we use to measure wealth.  It adds an incredible liability to the parents who can't afford them. And it invariably saddles taxpayers with higher tax bills for children who made the mistake of having children.  And this says nothing about the time parents must now divert from achieving financial stability and a well-compensating career to children they can't afford, damning them all into life-long poverty.

But for the low-low price of around $2,000, a 15 minute procedure, and 3 days of minor discomfort, men can inoculate themselves, and the world, against poverty.  It's one of the simplest things men can do to drastically improve their finances, lower their risk of poverty, and improve society in general.  And (please talk to your urologist), you can still extra sperm to have children at future date, on your terms, on your time, when you're good and ready to have a kid.  Not when a condom inconveniently breaks or "oops" she forgot to take the pill. 

Setting up an IRA will certainly help.  Getting certified in Python programming will increase your lifetime earnings potential.  And reading my super-awesome amazing books will definitely improve your finances.  But there is not one single thing an individual man can do to improve his future life more than insuring he won't have any accidental children.  And the way you can tell this is true is by how much that statement offends and insults people.

Enjoy the decline.

_____________________________

Check out the following 
VERY HELPFUL BOOKS below!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1494463180/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1494463180&linkCode=as2&tag=captaicapit0b-20&linkId=QTM5OYMWOORSUEQQ
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B084QKMZTJ/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=B084QKMZTJ&linkCode=as2&tag=captaicapit0b-20&linkId=fa8e349e2314b3e2c45028a86af0344f

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/154553909X/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=captaicapit0b-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=154553909X&linkId=45c4ea03097b1a5e12e0fbe0b148598e

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1467978302/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1467978302&linkCode=as2&tag=captaicapit0b-20&linkId=6JZGO4M6W7N57ZHC
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1522813756/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1522813756&linkCode=as2&tag=captaicapit0b-20&linkId=2ALZB2ECX7ULK2F4




Tuesday, March 24, 2020

The "Good Morning Coronachan" Podcast #4



Archive for all podcasts here.

The Coronachan Prayer

Dear Great and Merciful Coronachan,

Thank you for your non-sentient and zero-fucks given truth.
The teeth in threats that have been missing so much in the real world, that are yet necessary for us to value life, acknowledge truth, and love our fellow man.
May your nature continue to expose the evil and parasitic among us,
The lazy and those that put themselves above all others,
Our slave masters who have kept us enslaved,
Teachers who can be replaced by YouTube,
And the stupid and unprepared who riot for toilet paper, when there is none.
Bless us, oh Great Coronachan, and reward us, specifically those of us who were smart enough to have a 1 month supply of toilet paper and who stocked up on .556 ammo as a matter of basic insurance policy.
And may thine blessing come in the form of lower asset prices, less Boomers, less traffic,
cheap gas, and near free airline flights.

In thine name
Wuhan Wuhan

Amen


http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1522813756/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1522813756&linkCode=as2&tag=captaicapit0b-20&linkId=2ALZB2ECX7ULK2F4

Monday, March 23, 2020

The "Self Love" Movement and Why It's Toxic


This is an excerpt from the book "How Not to Become a Millennial."  In this segment we delve into a phenomenon I noticed when binging on feminist podcasts - the concept of "self love."  The term does NOT mean loving oneself a la self-respect or self-confidence, but is rather a very different and advanced concept within feminist (and other) circles that focuses on ignoring the wishes of others, putting yourself as the sole and only authoritative source of love, and thus the sole and only source of value and meaning in life.  It was - to put it in simple terms - delusional.  It's a combination of delusion, arrogance, and laziness where people are now simply declaring themselves "worthy," "valuable," or "deserving of love" simply because they are too lazy to put forth the effort, work, and toil to produce something of value that others might want. And so they turn inwards, deciding it is them and only them whose love they need.   

I predict you are going to see a lot more of this in the near future as an increasing percent of the population is going to be too fearful and cowardly of work to be of any use to anybody, and thus they will revert to this circularly delusional mental religion to masturbate their own value in life.  If you have not ran into this yet, you will shortly.  And remember you heard it here first.


"But among the many and important existential questions this fork in the road presented, a critically important one was what would give an individual value in life?  In the real world (as discussed in Chapter 24) what you offer other people is what gives you value in life.  Be it a product you make, a service you render, or perhaps improving yourself so much others wish to spend time with you, value was externally-conferred.  But in the insular world of the Millennial political religion value was self-conferred or internally conferred.  What you believed.  What you thought. Which correct politics you advocated.  It required the approval or participation of no one.  And so when presented with the choice of sacrificing your time and effort to produce something of value to society, or simply self-declaring yourself to have value because “reasons,” people realized one takes an incredible amount of effort and labor and the other does not. And as human laziness springs eternal we all know which path most Millennials (and most people) chose.

This resulted in pushing self-esteem another mile marker down the road into “self-love.”  But not the traditional self-love we’re familiar with (be it the healthy kind where you love yourself in the form of self-respect and self-confidence, or the bad kind where you are narcissistic or arrogant).  This new form of “self-love” is the next evolutionary stage of self-esteem where it creates an entire value structure where 100% of your life value is derived internally, not externally.  You don’t have to do anything for anyone. You don’t have to work or sacrifice or toil to create something of value for others.  You don’t have to invest in yourself to make yourself attractive to other people.  The concept of selflessness and altruism is completely absent from this form of love, if for the simple fact there is no counter-party to be selfless or altruistic towards.  And so this new love is a completely self-contained system.  A truly individual and personal affair, only requiring the individual and no one else.

The epitomal example of this new form of self-love can be found within the fat acceptance movement.  I was binging on a whole host of female-oriented podcasts, one of which was dedicated solely towards fat acceptance.  But of the many theories, sub-theories, concepts, and philosophies within the fat acceptance movement, “self-love” was one of the more interesting ones.  And best as my observations could tell me, self-love within the fat acceptance movement took on a role of asexuality.  That you didn’t need other people to have a full and rewarding love life.  That you unto yourself were enough to love.  Matter of fact seeking approval or love from others was a form of weakness, even oppression.  And therefore you had no obligation to others, only to yourself.

But this concept of self-love isn’t relegated to fat acceptance podcasts.  You can see it elsewhere.  Though anecdotal (and usually clickbait) there is the twice-a-year article about a woman marrying herself, her cat, or her dog.  There was even an article about a woman marrying her degree.  There is no limit to the number of men who live in alternative realities be it via video games, RPG’s, or “waifus.”  And not in a healthy and fun way where people get together and play a session of D&D, but where they love their character and their lives in a world that does not exist more than the one that does.  And there is no limit to the number of young people who place their politics ahead of everything else in life, including other people, deriving value only from their sanctimonious selves.

But whether it’s people in the fat acceptance movement, a woman marrying herself, a NEET playing a 48th level Paladin, or a self-obsessed “anarcho-communist” telling you about his politics when you didn’t ask, whatever mental acrobatics people execute to confer “self-love” upon themselves, in the end it boils down to one thing and one thing only – laziness.  These people are just too damn lazy to produce anything of value.  It’s not intellectual.  It’s not avant-garde.  It’s not edgy.  It’s just a huge, bogus, intellectual façade to lie to yourself that you have worth without having to produce anything of value because you’re so deathly afraid of work.  And ultimately it’s an admission of weakness as you’d rather stare into a pond like Narcissus instead of put in the work to get a profession, get a life, find love, or make some friends.

The Saddest Thing Ever – When Laziness Trumps Love

In the end self-love cannot have value and for multiple reasons why. 

First, in self-conferring love you essentially make yourself your own printing press of love.  And just like a government printing off money causes hyperinflation and destroys the value of a currency, so too does “printing off” self-love.  I can look in the mirror all day and say “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and dog gone it, people like me,” that doesn’t make it so.  There needs to be some genuine production, achievement, or accomplishments to give the individual intrinsic value.  Not a mere declaration of value by fiat.

Second the only consumer of this self-love currency can be the individual who manufactures it, because who else is going to want it?  The quickest way to deter somebody from spending time with you is to tell that person how great you are all the time.  And while certainly there is value in self-respect and self-confidence, when all somebody talks about is themselves without some amazing achievements and accomplishments in life to back it up (say like The World’s Most Interesting Man), other people quickly tune out, divest from the individual, and spend no time with that person.  Once again rendering that person insular and irrelevant to the rest of the entire world.

Third, there is an observational effect of value or love as we discussed about the musician’s theoretical composition sitting unseen on the surface of Mars in Chapter 24.  Unless there is another party or person to observe, appreciate, and like/love another person, then no such value exists.  Proponents of self-love would argue that this is precisely the point of self-love – that they don’t need an external party to confer or condone value/love upon them – but this then reinforces the entire point that self-love offers no value to society, only to one’s self.  And this is perhaps the core definition of self-love as it only benefits the individual, is for the sake of the individual, and offers nothing of value to others.  And so while podcasts can be recorded, research conducted, articles written, even books published about “self-love,” all that intellectually ballyhoo and pablum is completely unnecessary as the entire concept of self-love is completely summarized and described in one word:

Masturbation.

And a life based solely on masturbation is a very, very, very lonely life."

CHECK OUT THE BOOK!!!
SAVE A GEN Z'ER!
AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK AND KINDLE, 
SOON TO BE AUDIO AS WELL!

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Saturday, March 21, 2020

Financial and Prepping Advice During Coronachan - With Rich Cooper

Was on Rich Cooper's show yesterday and we chit chatted and took calls about what financial and prepping moves you can make during the outbreak.  Times may be bad, but there are TREMENDOUS opportunities that will not present themselves again for decades to come.  Tune in and share with loved ones.


Friday, March 20, 2020

Do Not Save the Corona-Hoes


How Men Can Own Reproductive Control

And coincidentally, eliminate the number one cause of poverty in the world.

But, that would require agency, responsibility, and about $2,000.


Wednesday, March 18, 2020

Two Episodes of The Clarey Podcast!

With The Great and Merciful Coronachan keeping us all at home Cappy did two podcasts to keep you all entertained.

Episode #320 The "Quarantined" Episode
Episode #321 The "Teachers Aren't Shit" Episode

Sound cloud is also being extra cunty with requiring people to login into Facebook to get the MP3's.  I'll need to use my old MS Explorer browser to get those files because Big Tech fucking sucks.  In the meantime, just stream them on Soundcloud.

Tuesday, March 17, 2020

With Finals Coming Up Pay Somebody to Write Your Papers For You

Once again, Alex and his company - Academic Composition - are always more than happy to offer their paper-writing services to students who simply don't want to write bullshit papers for bullshit classes.  Alex is also always hiring writers and marketers, jobs you can do from home.  He's penned this advertisement for an prospective clients or employees, so please reach out to him if you have an interest in either:

Hello everyone, 

Many of you may have already heard of us. Academic Composition has been sponsoring Captain Capitalism for over five years and we've gained a great deal from our collaboration.

Many of Aaron's readers market for us on a regular basis and this has been a mutually beneficial arrangement for all involved.

Once again, we are in the hunt for more marketers. 

The deal is simple, you post the ads and wait for the replies. Once people respond, you will be paid $5 for each lead. Most marketers get at least five leads per week and it only takes just a few minutes of work each week. Effectively, you will be earning more than a dollar per minute.

To get started, please follow these simple steps.

1. Please create a new gmail address
 
2. Activate the forwarding feature to make sure all incoming emails come to Aleksey.Bashtavenko@gmail.com. Please follow this basic tutorial to get started and let me know if you have any questions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KrhMX_7ZM3E
 
3. Use your new gmail address to create a Craigslist account

Once you complete these steps, please email us at academiccomposition@gmail.com and we'll walk you through the rest of the process.
Aleksey Bashtavenko
Academic Composition
Owner & Principal Writer
(540) 300-1253


How We Can Use Coronavirus to Bail Out Student Loans and Pay Down the National Debt

You can send your "thank you Cappy for saving the US economy" letters to Asshole Consulting.

Monday, March 16, 2020

Older Brother Younger Brother III

Jack Napier invited me on his show where we shot the shit a bit to escape the doldrums of the Coronachan quasi quarantine.  Nothing much exciting, but two guys shooting the shit and talk about "goat yoga."  Check it out as your evening constitutional.


Replace Teachers with YouTube