I am posting from Camp Verde, AZ. And the only reason, the SOLE ONLY REASON I PULLED OVER WAS IN HOPES THE GAS STATION WOULD HAVE INTERNET ACCESS SO I COULD SHARE THIS INGENIOUS IDEA I JUST HAD!
The 2 cylinder Ford Mustang!
You see, I think there's a HUGE market for a 2 cylinder Ford Mustang. For while driving out of Phoenix, I've spent the past 2 hours getting behind no less than 30 of those new Ford Mustangs. And the reason I'm behind them is because they're always in the left lane, driving next to a semi-truck, going the exact same speed which is usually 5 miles per hour UNDER the speed limit.
Inevitably we hit a mountain and the SEMI-TRUCK usually pulls ahead of the Ford Mustang,, allowing me the chance to pass. And when you pass people who clog up the left lane, you almost have this biological urge to look over and see what they look like. As if you're going to see some physical ailment that would explain why they're such retards for driving 10 MPH below the speed limit in the left lane.
Half expecting to see a 12 year old child at the wheel, the only thing I visually noticed that was out of the 30 or so Mustangs I passed, 25 we're occupied by normal looking, gray-haired middle aged couples with big smiles on their face. Not because they were vindictive and knew they had held me and half of the northbound traffic out of Phoenix up for the past 8 hours, but because they were driving a really cool and sweet Ford Mustang and just enjoying the cruise on a beautiful day, completely ignorant of the Rule of the Left Lane.
And this is a tragedy. For I don't think that I saw one Mustang that was using all 6 or 8 of its cylinders. I did not see one Mustang even pushed to 1/2 of its performance limits. If I was in that car, I'd not be in Camp Verde, I'd be in Canada right now.
Thus, since it is obvious that the slightly elder generation wants to buy the classical looking Mustangs that have come out in the past year, but don't want an actual sports car, I recommend the Ford Motor Corporation develop the 2 cylinder Ford Mustang, because that's about all the cylinders they're going to need.
"Yes, the 2 cylinder Ford Mustang. It looks cool, but drives slow! Are you in no particular rush to be anywhere? Want to take up precious traffic space in the left lane? Looking to get great fuel efficiency, but absolutely no performance whatsoever? Then get the 2 Cylinder Ford Mustang! It just looks cool, but it's not!"
And for all of you folk that have already bought Mustangs with all those nasty cylinders, don't worry you can donate it me and the younger folk. We'll take them off your hands and drive them like they were intended to be driven.
Now I must go. I think in the past 30 minutes of typing and eating and fueling, the Mustang Caravan might be catching up to me.