Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Ignorance: It's How the Democrats Stay in Power
And that's not even a slam. It's true.
If people were educated about just some basic simple economic principles and tenets as well as some basic statistics, the democratic party would go the way of the communists in Russia and Beanie Babies in the suburbs.
Alas, capitalism produces so much wealth that it pacifies the masses intellect into laziness and sloth, making them ripe picking for idiotic ideologies or religions like global warming and socialism.
Regardless, here is a recent example of such ignorance. The API (American Petroleum Institute) came out with it's 3rd annual "Energy IQ" survey. It's scary just how much it's like an intellectual version of Jay Leno's "Jay Walking."
Now there were many questions, the results of which you can find here, but my favorite is this one in that it shows you just how damn ignorant the masses are and how easy it is to get them to believe lies:
I'm being dead serious when I say there must be some kind of civics or intelligence test before you can vote. Call it dictatorial, but you'll all soon pay the costs for giving any uninformed, dumbass moron out there the right to vote.
Oh, and let me point out again
BIG OIL DIDN'T NEED A BAIL OUT
If people were educated about just some basic simple economic principles and tenets as well as some basic statistics, the democratic party would go the way of the communists in Russia and Beanie Babies in the suburbs.
Alas, capitalism produces so much wealth that it pacifies the masses intellect into laziness and sloth, making them ripe picking for idiotic ideologies or religions like global warming and socialism.
Regardless, here is a recent example of such ignorance. The API (American Petroleum Institute) came out with it's 3rd annual "Energy IQ" survey. It's scary just how much it's like an intellectual version of Jay Leno's "Jay Walking."
Now there were many questions, the results of which you can find here, but my favorite is this one in that it shows you just how damn ignorant the masses are and how easy it is to get them to believe lies:
I'm being dead serious when I say there must be some kind of civics or intelligence test before you can vote. Call it dictatorial, but you'll all soon pay the costs for giving any uninformed, dumbass moron out there the right to vote.
Oh, and let me point out again
BIG OIL DIDN'T NEED A BAIL OUT
Wal-Mart Cheaper Than Goodwill
Given this horrible recession and dire economy and while you wait around for Barack Our Saviour Obama to help, I thought it worthy pointing out that the much vilified and hated Wal-Mart has done more to help those of you suffering from the recession than our blessed government.
You can go to Wal-Mart and get the cheapest prices on practically EVERYTHING, which makes your dollars go further, but more importantly, INCREASES YOUR STANDARDS OF LIVING (those bastards!).
Now I know elite, faux-poor, trust fund babies will still rally against Wal-Mart, claiming they hurt the poor, while ignoring the fact the real poor go there for a reason, but just to show you the sheer power of a free, capitalistic entity such as Wal-Mart, I forgot to mention an interesting story.
The other day I went to Goodwill. Because Goodwill is cheap and proceeds go to help the poor. But when I couldn't find the particular picture frame I wanted, I had to go to Wal-Mart.
Thinking it would be more expensive, I was happy to find out that the management and business model of Wal-Mart is SO efficient, A BRAND NEW PICTURE FRAME WAS CHEAPER THAN A USED ONE AT GOODWILL.
Wal-Mart beating Goodwill on price.
Wow. That's really got to throw leftist religion for a loop.
You can go to Wal-Mart and get the cheapest prices on practically EVERYTHING, which makes your dollars go further, but more importantly, INCREASES YOUR STANDARDS OF LIVING (those bastards!).
Now I know elite, faux-poor, trust fund babies will still rally against Wal-Mart, claiming they hurt the poor, while ignoring the fact the real poor go there for a reason, but just to show you the sheer power of a free, capitalistic entity such as Wal-Mart, I forgot to mention an interesting story.
The other day I went to Goodwill. Because Goodwill is cheap and proceeds go to help the poor. But when I couldn't find the particular picture frame I wanted, I had to go to Wal-Mart.
Thinking it would be more expensive, I was happy to find out that the management and business model of Wal-Mart is SO efficient, A BRAND NEW PICTURE FRAME WAS CHEAPER THAN A USED ONE AT GOODWILL.
Wal-Mart beating Goodwill on price.
Wow. That's really got to throw leftist religion for a loop.
Because the Child Goes Well With the Drapes
I do not like children.
I have stated this before and I will continue to do so long into the future.
However, I do have an immeasurable amount of pity for children in that I remember what it was like being a child. Children are humans too.
They have the same feelings.
They have the same emotions.
But worse, they do not have the experience us adults do to explain the chaos that surrounds them. Especially if two adult children decide to bring one of these unfortunate souls into the world in a thoughtless act of passion and then use the poor kid as a chess piece when it comes to divorce time.
Ergo, children are truly innocent and why (paradoxically) I do not want any of my own, yet feel there is no other group or category of people that I have more pity and sympathy for than children.
But what I will not tolerate, because I DO GENUINELY care about children, is the god damned effing fad of having children for the sake of having children.
Let me explain.
Women want to have children.
Accepted, understood.
But when women (or sometimes men) have children because "THEY WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN" I can get no further enraged because it has immediately not become about the child, but the CHILD that wants to have a child.
"I want a child because I want a child."
Now let me explain something to all of you people who want "children."
"Children" are not effing items that go well with the drapes.
Children are not physical toys you purchase at Ikea to go well with the house.
Children are not a god damned SUV you can turn off or ship off to the mechanic to fine tune.
Children ARE HUMANS WITH REAL HUMAN EMOTIONS AND JUST AS MUCH CONSCIOUSNESS AND SENTIENTNESS AS YOU!
They suffer the same pains as you did.
They suffer the same emotions as you did.
And if you DARE bring a child into this world because it "CONVENIENCES" you, but are so selfish as to not provide a husband or father figure to this innocent soul, then you are the epitome of selfishness and why society is collapsing.
I know men are not fashionable.
I know they're not "cool."
But unfortunately MEN DO ACCOUNT FOR ROUGHLY 50% OF THE GOD DAMNED POPULATION.
And if your child, male or female, wishes to have any kind of sensible grounding or reference point as to how to interact with the opposite sex, let alone, the rest of society, they will need (a grandiose politically correct) "regrettably" father figure in the household.
I know, "DAMN FATHER FIGURES!" What do they know, those stupid males? They get in the way of me having children!
Well maybe, just maybe in 20 million years of evolution, they're there for a god damned purpose?
Look, I am all for gay marriage.
I am all for same sex couples.
Because I do know that even though they may be of the same sex, they will at least, provide the child with two parents.
But the greediness, conceitedness, and above all, selfishness of having a child because:
"I want a child"
as if he/she is like ordering freaking cable with the absence of a father
I will not stand for.
Enjoy sending your kid off to day care.
Enjoy OUTSOURCING the upbringing of your kid because s/he inconveniences you.
And when you're old
And crippled
And in a sub-par nursing home
And not getting any visits from your child
Then you'll know what it's like to be treated like a freaking consumer item and not a fellow human being.
Update. If any of you young men in your late teens and early 20's wonder why you are having problems dating girls, here's your answer.
Also a reason never to hire somebody from Yale.
I have stated this before and I will continue to do so long into the future.
However, I do have an immeasurable amount of pity for children in that I remember what it was like being a child. Children are humans too.
They have the same feelings.
They have the same emotions.
But worse, they do not have the experience us adults do to explain the chaos that surrounds them. Especially if two adult children decide to bring one of these unfortunate souls into the world in a thoughtless act of passion and then use the poor kid as a chess piece when it comes to divorce time.
Ergo, children are truly innocent and why (paradoxically) I do not want any of my own, yet feel there is no other group or category of people that I have more pity and sympathy for than children.
But what I will not tolerate, because I DO GENUINELY care about children, is the god damned effing fad of having children for the sake of having children.
Let me explain.
Women want to have children.
Accepted, understood.
But when women (or sometimes men) have children because "THEY WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN" I can get no further enraged because it has immediately not become about the child, but the CHILD that wants to have a child.
"I want a child because I want a child."
Now let me explain something to all of you people who want "children."
"Children" are not effing items that go well with the drapes.
Children are not physical toys you purchase at Ikea to go well with the house.
Children are not a god damned SUV you can turn off or ship off to the mechanic to fine tune.
Children ARE HUMANS WITH REAL HUMAN EMOTIONS AND JUST AS MUCH CONSCIOUSNESS AND SENTIENTNESS AS YOU!
They suffer the same pains as you did.
They suffer the same emotions as you did.
And if you DARE bring a child into this world because it "CONVENIENCES" you, but are so selfish as to not provide a husband or father figure to this innocent soul, then you are the epitome of selfishness and why society is collapsing.
I know men are not fashionable.
I know they're not "cool."
But unfortunately MEN DO ACCOUNT FOR ROUGHLY 50% OF THE GOD DAMNED POPULATION.
And if your child, male or female, wishes to have any kind of sensible grounding or reference point as to how to interact with the opposite sex, let alone, the rest of society, they will need (a grandiose politically correct) "regrettably" father figure in the household.
I know, "DAMN FATHER FIGURES!" What do they know, those stupid males? They get in the way of me having children!
Well maybe, just maybe in 20 million years of evolution, they're there for a god damned purpose?
Look, I am all for gay marriage.
I am all for same sex couples.
Because I do know that even though they may be of the same sex, they will at least, provide the child with two parents.
But the greediness, conceitedness, and above all, selfishness of having a child because:
"I want a child"
as if he/she is like ordering freaking cable with the absence of a father
I will not stand for.
Enjoy sending your kid off to day care.
Enjoy OUTSOURCING the upbringing of your kid because s/he inconveniences you.
And when you're old
And crippled
And in a sub-par nursing home
And not getting any visits from your child
Then you'll know what it's like to be treated like a freaking consumer item and not a fellow human being.
Update. If any of you young men in your late teens and early 20's wonder why you are having problems dating girls, here's your answer.
Also a reason never to hire somebody from Yale.
Old Things I've Found Cleaning
Further accelerating "Operation: Clean Out the House" I happened upon this which I estimate dates back to 1993.
You're young, you can spare a bladder.
Which is essentially all social security and medicare really is.
You're young, you can spare a bladder.
Which is essentially all social security and medicare really is.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Minneapolis Morons
You have to read this. This is the crap I have to deal with in Minneapolis.
I will make several observations and comments;
1. Neither one of these morons produces enough to support themselves. And it would not surprise me that either they are;
a. Spoiled brat suburbanite children whose parents have paid for everything
b. Spoiled brat government children whose government has paid for everything
In either case, neither one of them hold real jobs and rely on other people to take care of them.
2. Wild, crazy guess here, NEITHER ONE VOTED FOR JOHN MCCAIN
3. They didn't major in real subjects in college (if attended at all) because if they did, they may have had the engineering skills to make sure their engine would RUN MORE THAN 2 FREAKING MILES BEFORE CONKING OUT
4. "Alcohol was found on the scene." NOOOOOOOO!!!!
I will make several observations and comments;
1. Neither one of these morons produces enough to support themselves. And it would not surprise me that either they are;
a. Spoiled brat suburbanite children whose parents have paid for everything
b. Spoiled brat government children whose government has paid for everything
In either case, neither one of them hold real jobs and rely on other people to take care of them.
2. Wild, crazy guess here, NEITHER ONE VOTED FOR JOHN MCCAIN
3. They didn't major in real subjects in college (if attended at all) because if they did, they may have had the engineering skills to make sure their engine would RUN MORE THAN 2 FREAKING MILES BEFORE CONKING OUT
4. "Alcohol was found on the scene." NOOOOOOOO!!!!
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Hypotype of the 68th Medical Regiment
My grandpa died a while ago and going through some of his stuff I came across a newspaper/letter while he was in the Marines in WWII. Of the many places he was stationed, most notable was his participation in the Battle of Iwo Jima. He was on the second wave of Marines to hit the beach and being a medic certainly saw his fair share of bloodshed.
In any case, I don't know how many people are alive from the 68th Medical Regiment, but thought I might throw this up there in case some of the original authors or perhaps people mentioned in the publication might still be around and like to see a piece of yesteryear.
Here are the names listed in the publication so it is searchable;
Francis Kintz
Albert Schuster
William Hoffman
Richard Weinert
Lloyd Reid
Sigmund Nastale
Ike Woolf
Chaplain McBarron
Bill Hiehle
Elmer Vana
Hy Kaplan
Forg Giannaki
Stretch Putnam
Koewler Brafford
Winterbothom
Joe Perlman
Dave Pollack
Jesse Hutson
Rudy Goddard
Chester Walls
Joe Sulk
In any case, I don't know how many people are alive from the 68th Medical Regiment, but thought I might throw this up there in case some of the original authors or perhaps people mentioned in the publication might still be around and like to see a piece of yesteryear.
Here are the names listed in the publication so it is searchable;
Francis Kintz
Albert Schuster
William Hoffman
Richard Weinert
Lloyd Reid
Sigmund Nastale
Ike Woolf
Chaplain McBarron
Bill Hiehle
Elmer Vana
Hy Kaplan
Forg Giannaki
Stretch Putnam
Koewler Brafford
Winterbothom
Joe Perlman
Dave Pollack
Jesse Hutson
Rudy Goddard
Chester Walls
Joe Sulk
Washington Avenue Bridge
I have received several requests regarding the Washington Avenue Bridge which I have referenced frequently both here and in my book.
Basically it is a bridge spanning the Mississippi that connects the East and West banks of the U of Minnesota campus. It is just 3/4 miles downstream from the famous 35W bridge that collapsed about 2 years ago.
During my tenure there it was an ugly, minimalist, 1960's architectural piece of crap that only stoned or drunk baby boomers would have found visually pleasing (kind of like listening to The Doors). Since then they painted it and made it look less disgusting.
Originally the interior corridor was supposed to be heated so students could walk to each bank in comfort during the harsh winters. But that would have cost too much and communications professors would have to earn a paltry $65,000 per year instead of the $70,000 they earn now, plus we wouldn't have a new stadium every year for teams that never win championships, so you can see why it was important never to heat the damn thing no matter how much it would have benefited the masses.
The above picture was a picture I took during the summer of 1994. You can see just what a dreary bridge it was.
Basically it is a bridge spanning the Mississippi that connects the East and West banks of the U of Minnesota campus. It is just 3/4 miles downstream from the famous 35W bridge that collapsed about 2 years ago.
During my tenure there it was an ugly, minimalist, 1960's architectural piece of crap that only stoned or drunk baby boomers would have found visually pleasing (kind of like listening to The Doors). Since then they painted it and made it look less disgusting.
Originally the interior corridor was supposed to be heated so students could walk to each bank in comfort during the harsh winters. But that would have cost too much and communications professors would have to earn a paltry $65,000 per year instead of the $70,000 they earn now, plus we wouldn't have a new stadium every year for teams that never win championships, so you can see why it was important never to heat the damn thing no matter how much it would have benefited the masses.
The above picture was a picture I took during the summer of 1994. You can see just what a dreary bridge it was.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
The Captain's Casting Call
As you may have noticed I have enlisted the help of some beautiful femme fatales to advertise and promote various aspects of Cappy Cap on the side bar.
However, while currently I only have 2 models, I need 5.
And despite a casting call going out to my female friends, only two have responded while the rest have said, "Yes, sure, that would be great" but have since only managed to procrastinate.
Ergo!:
I am putting forth a casting call for any Cappy Cap readers of the female persuasion who would be interested in becoming one of the Captain's models. You can see by the current models (Natasha and Sindi) that the pictures are appropriate and cute, nothing sexual or lewd. More or less just looking for a woo-ing or sighing type face and then I'll put some schmaltzy line in with the picture.
In any case, if you or somebody you know that loves capitalism and is interested, shoot me an e-mail at;
CAPTcapitalism@yahoo.com
Mucho thanks!
However, while currently I only have 2 models, I need 5.
And despite a casting call going out to my female friends, only two have responded while the rest have said, "Yes, sure, that would be great" but have since only managed to procrastinate.
Ergo!:
I am putting forth a casting call for any Cappy Cap readers of the female persuasion who would be interested in becoming one of the Captain's models. You can see by the current models (Natasha and Sindi) that the pictures are appropriate and cute, nothing sexual or lewd. More or less just looking for a woo-ing or sighing type face and then I'll put some schmaltzy line in with the picture.
In any case, if you or somebody you know that loves capitalism and is interested, shoot me an e-mail at;
CAPTcapitalism@yahoo.com
Mucho thanks!
Masters Degree in READING
Oh wow.
I get job updates from a website called Indeed.com. And this one came in the mail.
There are two things horribly appalling about this.
One, the fact there is a FREAKING COLLEGE CLASS ON HOW TO READ
Two, even MORE APPALLING IS YOU NEED YOUR EFFING MASTERS DEGREE TO TEACH THE DAMN CLASS!
Wow, just all I can say is effing wow.
I get job updates from a website called Indeed.com. And this one came in the mail.
There are two things horribly appalling about this.
One, the fact there is a FREAKING COLLEGE CLASS ON HOW TO READ
Two, even MORE APPALLING IS YOU NEED YOUR EFFING MASTERS DEGREE TO TEACH THE DAMN CLASS!
Wow, just all I can say is effing wow.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Deondra
This one is for a poor kid I just met, Ferdinand.
I entered college at the age of 18 weighing 147 pounds.
By the time I was 19 years of age I had dropped down to 118.
And the reason for this precipitous loss in weight was two-fold.
One, I was dirt poor with no financial support from my parents, nor the government, and thusly could not afford any kind of fast food, let alone groceries, and therefore LOST the freshman 15 instead of gained it.
Two, I worked as campus security where, among other things, our job was to patrol the campus on foot or on bike where the AVERAGE night you would put 50 miles on your bike or 10 miles on foot.
Now I’m leaving A LOT of stuff out, but in short this period of time was hands down, without compare, the worst days in my life. I worked full time, went to school full time and frankly barely attended any parties, let alone had much of a social life outside of work, because the financial and academic rigors of college demanded it. Ergo, why I have no pity whatsoever when I hear spoiled brats complain about the costs of college while daddy financed them a brand new car or takes care of their credit card bills and practically all other living expenses, EXCEPT tuition.
Regardless, though all of college could generally be described as a 3.5 year abyss, the pits of the pits, the darkest depths of the abyss was my first Christmas break.
I didn’t know if I was going to make it or not. I was just one trimester (the U had “trimesters” back then) into college then and all I had known was sleep depravation and poverty. But add to this hellish existence two more complications and it became unbearable;
1. Loneliness. I couldn’t afford to go back home for Christmas break, and home was only 1.5 hours away. I had to sign up for as many shifts and OT as I could, or I otherwise would not have been able to afford the next trimester of tuition. And while I was happy to have the work, instead of a full force of security, they scaled back operations to “the Dirty Dozen” the 12 or 13 or so security guards that would pick up the rest of the shifts while the rest of the guards went home for Christmas break. And sure you’d see each other occasionally checking in or out of HQ, but you’d patrol by yourself for 12 hours, over a veritable lifeless arctic tundra, go to a deserted dorm, and do it all over again, day in, day out for the next month.
2. Cold. Minnesota is cold. And though nothing personal or emotional, it wears on you psychologically, especially if you’re patrolling out in subzero temperatures on hour 22 of a 32 hour shift over the Washington Avenue bridge on Christmas eve (and no, I am not making this up). It doesn’t get warm. It’s always cold. But the campus needed parking lot and bridge patrols and so you would do push ups to stay warm, pad your boots with paper towels from the bathrooms to stave off the frost bite and come up with stupid poems to stave off the insanity.
However, there was one bit of hope. There was one shimmer of light I had in this otherwise dreary, bitterly cold nightmarish existence;
Deondra.
Deondra was a freshman just like me. And though I had no time for social activities or the pursuit of cute girls, Deondra was that one weird girl that pursued me. Not aggressively, but as I was just sitting there in the cafeteria she just came up and asked if she could sit there. Kind of shocked I said “sure” and thus begat a friendly conversation which led to a couple dates.
It was already late into fall and my work schedule was such that not much of a heated romance could form, but by the time winter break rolled around and the campus emptied itself, there was really nothing or nobody else for socializing. Sure I had friends at work, but we were nothing but sleep-deprived, hypothermic zombies that would greet each other in between work and sleep shifts. But there was that one nice, kind girl. The one who was kind enough to go out on a couple dates and even drive me to the grocery store so I could get groceries.
Well it was the middle of December, the campus was deserted, and I received a call from Deondra. She was wondering how I was doing and what I had going on for Christmas. I said,
“Well I have to work Christmas Eve into Christmas Day, then wake up again around 8PM so I can start my shift at 9PM.”
She said, “Aren’t you going home?”
I said, “No, I can’t, I have to work. Besides, I don’t have a car, so I couldn’t go even if I wanted to.”
Feeling pity for me she said, “Well, why don’t you come over to my folks house for Christmas dinner in Apple Valley?”
The smile on my face was like seeing a beautiful nurse in a WWII battlefield hospital. I was already physically and psychologically depleted and the company on Christmas day, not to mention a home made, warm meal was the best Christmas gift one could ask for.
I said “Sure, that would be great.”
And she said, “Well I’ll pick you up at 5PM and then drop you back off at the police department at 9PM just in time for work.”
I said, “Thanks, I really appreciate it.”
My Christmas Eve shift was somehow not as cold as the previous ones (even though if I recall correctly that night it had dropped to -10 degrees). The patrols were not as dreary and the entire night I got to look forward to and dream about the food and this really sweet nice girl that was going to have me over for dinner. Matter of fact, this is the type of girl you would probably want to hold onto and get serious with. Beautiful, educated, and kind. I let those thoughts carry me through until you could see the sun start to lighten up the eastern sky as 7AM approached and most families in the nation started opening their Christmas gifts (unless of course you’re one of those cheating Catholics that can’t wait until the 25th and open theirs on the 24th!)
I trudged back to my deserted dorm, too tired to take a shower, crawled into my bed in full uniform, set the alarm for 430PM and fell asleep immediately, though no doubt with a smile on my face.
The alarm on my Ironman digital watch woke me up. I got up like most kids did 10 hours previously, giddy and excited. Hopped in the shower, put on a nice shirt and some slacks, packed my uniform and my winter gear, until I realized I hadn’t gotten Deondra any kind of gift. I looked around frantically as well as equally hopelessly because what possible gift would an impoverished college freshman have in his dorm that would make for any kind of Christmas gift? I figured the best I could do was write a funny, light hearted poem thanking her for her kindness, but with the 10 minutes I had to go before she picked me up, the poem was nothing to be proud off. Regardless, I took it, still debating whether I would even give it to her or not and rushed downstairs.
There I sat in the lobby, nobody there except the desk clerk working on some papers. Deadly silent as the snow was falling as I looked out the window, sitting there with my backpack and a folded up piece of paper with the poem on it. It was getting dark, still a little bit of light left, I looked at my watch and it was 5PM.
I set my watch fast just for instances like these to make sure I was on time. Still had a couple minutes to go, so I figured she would pull up momentarily and let my thoughts drift about what kind of food would be at her house.
Turkey? Chicken? Steak? Some potatoes. Ooo! I could get a doggy bag and be able to eat a good meal on my overnight shift. I could totally gorge myself and get that first home made meal in 3 months.
I looked at my watch. 5:03.
Hmmm… Must have run into traffic. Snow probably slowing down traffic.
5:10.
Wow, traffic must really be bad…even for Christmas day…I hope she’s alright.
5:15
I decided to go call her house (because we didn’t have cell phones back then) to see if she was on her way. Went to the desk to use their phone. It rang and rang and rang and I got her voicemail.
“Hey Deondra, it’s me, just wondering if you’re on your way or not.”
5:25
Decided to try calling again. Still no answer, just her voicemail.
And at 1730 hours on December 25th, 1993 your rookie, idealistic, naïve Captain had a pivotal epiphany that would set him down the path that in part made him he is the man he is today.
“I don’t think she’s coming.”
It’s kind of like Afro Samurai, if you’ve ever seen it. Samuel Jackson does the voice for an imaginary sidekick Afro Samurai has and more or less acts as his id-subconscious. And the entire movie this hallucination talks to Afro, giving him advice, if not, more so picking on him.
It was the same thing. Not that I was hallucinating and there was some alterego version of me, but in my head I started having a conversation with myself.
“Why wouldn’t she show up?
What did I do wrong?
How could somebody do something like this?”
And other stupid questions naïve, 18 year old American boys will ask themselves on the precipice of the hell they have no idea that they’re about to enter called “conventional American dating.”
Now needless to say that Christmas night was certainly one of the darkest, badest ones in my life (and I’ve had plenty). I have rarely had such anger and hatred. I don’t even remember the night being cold or dreary or painful. I don’t even remember getting tired. But I do remember coming to a very important conclusion that most men do not have the benefit of realizing until they’re much older.
“I don’t have time for this shit.”
Now, this is long ago in the past, but that does not mean the lesson should not be passed on or that we should not learn something from it. And as I see men younger than me, confused and dazed as to what they did wrong, and girls wondering why men seem to become aloof and indifferent to marriage or engaging in things such as a “marriage strike” allow me to help those of you younger aspiring, junior, deputy and otherwise economists out there by making some lessons crystal clear;
Boys/Men – When you are younger, say 14 to 25 or so, you have to realize you are not dating adults. You are dating children. I don’t know why, but my experience has told me sometimes girls at this age prefer to play games more than do anything approaching engaging in a real dating or courting relationship. In a sick and twisted way, they prefer to string you along and play games and find it fun. I don’t even think they realize that you are a human being too, and it takes on more of a roll where it’s like a cat toying with a wounded mouse. I don’t know why. I don’t have empirical proof of it. It’s only been my anecdotal experiences that have led me to this conclusion.
Regardless, the whole point is that IT IS UNACCEPTABLE TO BE STOOD UP FOR A DATE PERIOD. There is nothing wrong with you if you get stood up, but rather there is something wrong with them. And if there’s one thing I wish I could convey to the younger men out there it’s that it’s NOT YOUR FAULT. You cannot take it out on you as did I and millions of other men have. And while it is hard to be indifferent or aloof to a girl standing you up, you must view it in terms of “Is a girl who stands men up for s’s and g’s the type of girl I want to date?” You will come to the same conclusion I did;
“I don’t have time for this shit.”
Conversely, it is just as evil and bad to stand girls up. Don’t do it. Think about what you’ve been put through and then think about how you felt and know you’ve caused the same pain in a girl, who is probably equally innocent.
Girls/Women – DO NOT STAND UP A GUY EVER. You want to be the 40 year old with no husband, but a nice collection of cats and a lonely hate-filled life? Well sweetheart, you’re well on your way. Men are not bobbles to toy around with and re-enact your favorite episodes of Dawson’s Creek or 90210 on. Many women ask “where are all the good guys?” Well, ask yourself the question how many you stood up, how many you played games with, or how many you just didn’t treat respectfully and there’s your answer.
Not that it will make you feel any better Ferdinand, but all the veterans have been there before.
I entered college at the age of 18 weighing 147 pounds.
By the time I was 19 years of age I had dropped down to 118.
And the reason for this precipitous loss in weight was two-fold.
One, I was dirt poor with no financial support from my parents, nor the government, and thusly could not afford any kind of fast food, let alone groceries, and therefore LOST the freshman 15 instead of gained it.
Two, I worked as campus security where, among other things, our job was to patrol the campus on foot or on bike where the AVERAGE night you would put 50 miles on your bike or 10 miles on foot.
Now I’m leaving A LOT of stuff out, but in short this period of time was hands down, without compare, the worst days in my life. I worked full time, went to school full time and frankly barely attended any parties, let alone had much of a social life outside of work, because the financial and academic rigors of college demanded it. Ergo, why I have no pity whatsoever when I hear spoiled brats complain about the costs of college while daddy financed them a brand new car or takes care of their credit card bills and practically all other living expenses, EXCEPT tuition.
Regardless, though all of college could generally be described as a 3.5 year abyss, the pits of the pits, the darkest depths of the abyss was my first Christmas break.
I didn’t know if I was going to make it or not. I was just one trimester (the U had “trimesters” back then) into college then and all I had known was sleep depravation and poverty. But add to this hellish existence two more complications and it became unbearable;
1. Loneliness. I couldn’t afford to go back home for Christmas break, and home was only 1.5 hours away. I had to sign up for as many shifts and OT as I could, or I otherwise would not have been able to afford the next trimester of tuition. And while I was happy to have the work, instead of a full force of security, they scaled back operations to “the Dirty Dozen” the 12 or 13 or so security guards that would pick up the rest of the shifts while the rest of the guards went home for Christmas break. And sure you’d see each other occasionally checking in or out of HQ, but you’d patrol by yourself for 12 hours, over a veritable lifeless arctic tundra, go to a deserted dorm, and do it all over again, day in, day out for the next month.
2. Cold. Minnesota is cold. And though nothing personal or emotional, it wears on you psychologically, especially if you’re patrolling out in subzero temperatures on hour 22 of a 32 hour shift over the Washington Avenue bridge on Christmas eve (and no, I am not making this up). It doesn’t get warm. It’s always cold. But the campus needed parking lot and bridge patrols and so you would do push ups to stay warm, pad your boots with paper towels from the bathrooms to stave off the frost bite and come up with stupid poems to stave off the insanity.
However, there was one bit of hope. There was one shimmer of light I had in this otherwise dreary, bitterly cold nightmarish existence;
Deondra.
Deondra was a freshman just like me. And though I had no time for social activities or the pursuit of cute girls, Deondra was that one weird girl that pursued me. Not aggressively, but as I was just sitting there in the cafeteria she just came up and asked if she could sit there. Kind of shocked I said “sure” and thus begat a friendly conversation which led to a couple dates.
It was already late into fall and my work schedule was such that not much of a heated romance could form, but by the time winter break rolled around and the campus emptied itself, there was really nothing or nobody else for socializing. Sure I had friends at work, but we were nothing but sleep-deprived, hypothermic zombies that would greet each other in between work and sleep shifts. But there was that one nice, kind girl. The one who was kind enough to go out on a couple dates and even drive me to the grocery store so I could get groceries.
Well it was the middle of December, the campus was deserted, and I received a call from Deondra. She was wondering how I was doing and what I had going on for Christmas. I said,
“Well I have to work Christmas Eve into Christmas Day, then wake up again around 8PM so I can start my shift at 9PM.”
She said, “Aren’t you going home?”
I said, “No, I can’t, I have to work. Besides, I don’t have a car, so I couldn’t go even if I wanted to.”
Feeling pity for me she said, “Well, why don’t you come over to my folks house for Christmas dinner in Apple Valley?”
The smile on my face was like seeing a beautiful nurse in a WWII battlefield hospital. I was already physically and psychologically depleted and the company on Christmas day, not to mention a home made, warm meal was the best Christmas gift one could ask for.
I said “Sure, that would be great.”
And she said, “Well I’ll pick you up at 5PM and then drop you back off at the police department at 9PM just in time for work.”
I said, “Thanks, I really appreciate it.”
My Christmas Eve shift was somehow not as cold as the previous ones (even though if I recall correctly that night it had dropped to -10 degrees). The patrols were not as dreary and the entire night I got to look forward to and dream about the food and this really sweet nice girl that was going to have me over for dinner. Matter of fact, this is the type of girl you would probably want to hold onto and get serious with. Beautiful, educated, and kind. I let those thoughts carry me through until you could see the sun start to lighten up the eastern sky as 7AM approached and most families in the nation started opening their Christmas gifts (unless of course you’re one of those cheating Catholics that can’t wait until the 25th and open theirs on the 24th!)
I trudged back to my deserted dorm, too tired to take a shower, crawled into my bed in full uniform, set the alarm for 430PM and fell asleep immediately, though no doubt with a smile on my face.
The alarm on my Ironman digital watch woke me up. I got up like most kids did 10 hours previously, giddy and excited. Hopped in the shower, put on a nice shirt and some slacks, packed my uniform and my winter gear, until I realized I hadn’t gotten Deondra any kind of gift. I looked around frantically as well as equally hopelessly because what possible gift would an impoverished college freshman have in his dorm that would make for any kind of Christmas gift? I figured the best I could do was write a funny, light hearted poem thanking her for her kindness, but with the 10 minutes I had to go before she picked me up, the poem was nothing to be proud off. Regardless, I took it, still debating whether I would even give it to her or not and rushed downstairs.
There I sat in the lobby, nobody there except the desk clerk working on some papers. Deadly silent as the snow was falling as I looked out the window, sitting there with my backpack and a folded up piece of paper with the poem on it. It was getting dark, still a little bit of light left, I looked at my watch and it was 5PM.
I set my watch fast just for instances like these to make sure I was on time. Still had a couple minutes to go, so I figured she would pull up momentarily and let my thoughts drift about what kind of food would be at her house.
Turkey? Chicken? Steak? Some potatoes. Ooo! I could get a doggy bag and be able to eat a good meal on my overnight shift. I could totally gorge myself and get that first home made meal in 3 months.
I looked at my watch. 5:03.
Hmmm… Must have run into traffic. Snow probably slowing down traffic.
5:10.
Wow, traffic must really be bad…even for Christmas day…I hope she’s alright.
5:15
I decided to go call her house (because we didn’t have cell phones back then) to see if she was on her way. Went to the desk to use their phone. It rang and rang and rang and I got her voicemail.
“Hey Deondra, it’s me, just wondering if you’re on your way or not.”
5:25
Decided to try calling again. Still no answer, just her voicemail.
And at 1730 hours on December 25th, 1993 your rookie, idealistic, naïve Captain had a pivotal epiphany that would set him down the path that in part made him he is the man he is today.
“I don’t think she’s coming.”
It’s kind of like Afro Samurai, if you’ve ever seen it. Samuel Jackson does the voice for an imaginary sidekick Afro Samurai has and more or less acts as his id-subconscious. And the entire movie this hallucination talks to Afro, giving him advice, if not, more so picking on him.
It was the same thing. Not that I was hallucinating and there was some alterego version of me, but in my head I started having a conversation with myself.
“Why wouldn’t she show up?
What did I do wrong?
How could somebody do something like this?”
And other stupid questions naïve, 18 year old American boys will ask themselves on the precipice of the hell they have no idea that they’re about to enter called “conventional American dating.”
Now needless to say that Christmas night was certainly one of the darkest, badest ones in my life (and I’ve had plenty). I have rarely had such anger and hatred. I don’t even remember the night being cold or dreary or painful. I don’t even remember getting tired. But I do remember coming to a very important conclusion that most men do not have the benefit of realizing until they’re much older.
“I don’t have time for this shit.”
Now, this is long ago in the past, but that does not mean the lesson should not be passed on or that we should not learn something from it. And as I see men younger than me, confused and dazed as to what they did wrong, and girls wondering why men seem to become aloof and indifferent to marriage or engaging in things such as a “marriage strike” allow me to help those of you younger aspiring, junior, deputy and otherwise economists out there by making some lessons crystal clear;
Boys/Men – When you are younger, say 14 to 25 or so, you have to realize you are not dating adults. You are dating children. I don’t know why, but my experience has told me sometimes girls at this age prefer to play games more than do anything approaching engaging in a real dating or courting relationship. In a sick and twisted way, they prefer to string you along and play games and find it fun. I don’t even think they realize that you are a human being too, and it takes on more of a roll where it’s like a cat toying with a wounded mouse. I don’t know why. I don’t have empirical proof of it. It’s only been my anecdotal experiences that have led me to this conclusion.
Regardless, the whole point is that IT IS UNACCEPTABLE TO BE STOOD UP FOR A DATE PERIOD. There is nothing wrong with you if you get stood up, but rather there is something wrong with them. And if there’s one thing I wish I could convey to the younger men out there it’s that it’s NOT YOUR FAULT. You cannot take it out on you as did I and millions of other men have. And while it is hard to be indifferent or aloof to a girl standing you up, you must view it in terms of “Is a girl who stands men up for s’s and g’s the type of girl I want to date?” You will come to the same conclusion I did;
“I don’t have time for this shit.”
Conversely, it is just as evil and bad to stand girls up. Don’t do it. Think about what you’ve been put through and then think about how you felt and know you’ve caused the same pain in a girl, who is probably equally innocent.
Girls/Women – DO NOT STAND UP A GUY EVER. You want to be the 40 year old with no husband, but a nice collection of cats and a lonely hate-filled life? Well sweetheart, you’re well on your way. Men are not bobbles to toy around with and re-enact your favorite episodes of Dawson’s Creek or 90210 on. Many women ask “where are all the good guys?” Well, ask yourself the question how many you stood up, how many you played games with, or how many you just didn’t treat respectfully and there’s your answer.
Not that it will make you feel any better Ferdinand, but all the veterans have been there before.
Monday, June 22, 2009
The Captain's "Obscene Profit Break"
Tis that time again! Time to plug the Captain's wares and services so that he may continue to put food on the table, pay the mortgage and mayhaps save a little extra for his fossil hunting expeditions and Rumpleminze.
In any case, you can help the Captain by;
1. Donating to the "cause." That "cause" being raising enough money to pay off his mortgage early. Wouldn't it give you warm fuzzies to know you helped the Captain pay off his mortgage early?
2. Buy the Captain's Book (which I think most of you already have, but in case there's a couple stragglers out there).
3. Buy some stuff. Stuff, meaning primarily shirts and coffee mugs. Still working on this one to offer a larger selection.
4. Take a class with the Captain! Be it a basic personal financial class WHICH IS AN OUTSTANDING CLASS FOR YOUNGER FOLK or just a damn fine class on stock analysis and valuation, you will not be let down and it is definitely worth the money.
5. What economist is complete without his ability to offer dancing instruction!? Buy a DVD and see what the Captain looked like when he had long hair and still dated girls in their 20's. (makes a great gift for the capitalist femme fatale in your life!)
6. Arguably the best thing you can do is tell a friend about the Captain!
But no, seriously, the Captain likes money. Buy some stuff.
In any case, you can help the Captain by;
1. Donating to the "cause." That "cause" being raising enough money to pay off his mortgage early. Wouldn't it give you warm fuzzies to know you helped the Captain pay off his mortgage early?
2. Buy the Captain's Book (which I think most of you already have, but in case there's a couple stragglers out there).
3. Buy some stuff. Stuff, meaning primarily shirts and coffee mugs. Still working on this one to offer a larger selection.
4. Take a class with the Captain! Be it a basic personal financial class WHICH IS AN OUTSTANDING CLASS FOR YOUNGER FOLK or just a damn fine class on stock analysis and valuation, you will not be let down and it is definitely worth the money.
5. What economist is complete without his ability to offer dancing instruction!? Buy a DVD and see what the Captain looked like when he had long hair and still dated girls in their 20's. (makes a great gift for the capitalist femme fatale in your life!)
6. Arguably the best thing you can do is tell a friend about the Captain!
But no, seriously, the Captain likes money. Buy some stuff.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Wind Power
Because people demand power all the time and frankly, the wind doesn't blow...or maybe the wind just "blows."
Please Explain to Me Why We Hate the Jews
There are many questions I wish I had the answers to, but before I die, I just want the answer to one thing;
WHAT THE HELL IS IT WITH THE JEWS?
Egypt enslaves them.
Hitler kills them.
Neo-nazi idiots despise them.
Leftists blame them for everything today.
And precisely WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO DESERVE THIS IRE????
And I'm serious about this.
As far as I'm concerned the Jews have done nothing. I've never ran into a Jew that was even anything as impolite. They don't throw it in my face that they're a Jew. They've never betrayed me or done anything at all but be civil and kind people. But hooooy boy, does the world like them to be their whipping boys.
Now maybe I've missed something (though I doubt it), but it behooves the question why is there such disdain and hatred for the Jews over such a long record of history?
I will ONLY ENTERTAIN SERIOUS THEORIES, so any anti-Semitic Aryian nation nutjobs or crazy whacked out Islamic terrorists, just shut the hell up. It is a question that though not at the fore front of my mind, has been gnawing at me for a while.
WHAT THE HELL IS IT WITH THE JEWS?
Egypt enslaves them.
Hitler kills them.
Neo-nazi idiots despise them.
Leftists blame them for everything today.
And precisely WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO DESERVE THIS IRE????
And I'm serious about this.
As far as I'm concerned the Jews have done nothing. I've never ran into a Jew that was even anything as impolite. They don't throw it in my face that they're a Jew. They've never betrayed me or done anything at all but be civil and kind people. But hooooy boy, does the world like them to be their whipping boys.
Now maybe I've missed something (though I doubt it), but it behooves the question why is there such disdain and hatred for the Jews over such a long record of history?
I will ONLY ENTERTAIN SERIOUS THEORIES, so any anti-Semitic Aryian nation nutjobs or crazy whacked out Islamic terrorists, just shut the hell up. It is a question that though not at the fore front of my mind, has been gnawing at me for a while.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
The MBA Bubble Continues
A friend of mine sent this to me.
And what I get a kick out of is not the fact they can't find jobs or that once again your beloved Captain has done his job as an economist and predicted things accurately again. I get a kick out of how they don't know if this is "normal" to be out of a job this long. Telling me they have NOT had the basics of economics taught to them (or some slanted, indoctrinist's view of economics was foisted upon them).
Ergo, I believe it is high time for another "Economic Lesson of the Day" by the Captain.
Now, everybody who is graduating would like jobs. And I know you may have been taught jobs come from Barack Obama's Magical Farting Unicorns and we'll just borrow a trillion dollars in some Keynesian thing and then the "pump will be primed" and then there will be a multiplier effect and then boom! Jobs!
But, I'm sorry kiddies. That's not how it works.
You see, you've been misled. The way I can tell is that (1) people in the general population think the government somehow has something to do with creating jobs. they say the "government must do SOMETHING" and (2) MB-freaking-A's can't even explain why they don't have jobs.
Both of which suggest to me you're working from an erroneous premise and that is that somehow the government is where jobs come from.
I've been meaning to make a post titled "The Great Liberal Economic Oort Cloud" (GLEOC) where liberals (and others) typically believe jobs come from government. The reason for the Oort Cloud metaphor is because they don't really know HOW jobs are created by government, but just assume that's where jobs come from. In reality, it is simply people being too intellectually lazy to think the economics of job creation through. They believe the government with its trillions of dollars and businesses and laws and lawyers and all these "really smart professional people" make this nice big "economic Oort cloud" and farts out jobs. It's not their concern how jobs are really created, it's all really too complicated for them to understand. Thank god we have Barack Obama and really smart Ivy Leaguers heading up the GLEOC!
But allow me to pose another theory (which isn't really a theory, it's reality). The Symbiotic Parasite Host Relationship Model (SPHRM).
You see, if you think about it, without an economy, without a people, without businesses, there is no need for government. If you have nothing to govern, then governments would not exist. Ergo, the GLEOC model is flawed because it puts the cart before the horse. If you believe in the GLEOC, then governments existed and people arose in response.
Obviously it's the reverse. With people, with a society, with an economy comes the need for it to be governed.
Therefore it is the government that lives off of the people and the economy.
Now, this FACT makes government a parasitic organization. It NEEDS a host. If there is no economy or society, there is no way a government can form on top of it. And this is not to say that government is bad or that were are using the word "parasitic" in the pejorative. It is needed and ergo why the relationship between the government and the economy is (or at least should be) symbiotic.
Symbiosis aside, the key thing is the SPHRM is correct in that it puts the horse before the cart. Therefore if you want job creation, guess what?
Yep, I'm sorry, that means you have to grow the private sector.
See, there is no public sector if there is no private sector because the private sector is the host the public sector needs. But if you look at how public sector has been crowding out the private sector you are seeing a parasite that has gone form just 3% the size of the host to now 40% (the chart below just shows federal spending, not state).
The host is frankly going into shock and dying.
Now, I know in college you were told by academians and government paid bureaucrats that you could all major in Puppies and Flowers and all get government jobs as "social workers" or "teachers" or "community organizers" or "government consultants" or become professors like them, but unfortunately that is following the GLEOC model. And the GLEOC model is not sustainable.
If you want jobs you have to grow the private sector. Which means doing things like;
1. ELIMINATING (not cut) ELIMINATING corporate taxes and BANNING THEM FOREVER
2. ELIMINATING (not cut) any form of capital gains or dividend taxes
3. Simplify the tax code.
4. Put limits on how large the parasite can grow as a percent of the economy
5. Scale down the size of the parasite itself so that the host may grow again
Of course (and this is where I spend most of my time now thinking and philosophizing about economics because this is really where the crux of this whole economics/political dynamic is being fought) what it funny is you've all been brainwashed from high school on to more or less hate the private sector. You hate "evil corporations." You hate "evil Corporate America." You hate "big oil." You're more than willing to vote more and more regulations to strangle the host. "Hey, let's all go green because it's cool!" "Yeaaa! Corporate Social Responsibility is the NEW MBA TREND!" You are all more or less programmed to be part of the parasite (or at least support the parasite) at the expense of the host.
And as I've been pushing the frontier of this particular philosophy out further, I've realized (sadly) you're so brainwashed no amount of reason, logic or plain ole facts and statistics are going to convince you otherwise. In other words, I've explained to you why you don't have jobs. I've explained to you how to get jobs. But you're so intellectually dishonest and weak your ego cannot sustain the fact you've been duped by previous generations. And since pride is now going to get in the way of truth, thereby condemning the host (and parasite might I add) to death, for me and my SPHRM-subscribing colleagues there's only one thing left to do;
Enjoy the Decline!
(oh! And buy my book which is on Kindle for 99 cents! Buying my book qualifies as enjoying the decline)
And what I get a kick out of is not the fact they can't find jobs or that once again your beloved Captain has done his job as an economist and predicted things accurately again. I get a kick out of how they don't know if this is "normal" to be out of a job this long. Telling me they have NOT had the basics of economics taught to them (or some slanted, indoctrinist's view of economics was foisted upon them).
Ergo, I believe it is high time for another "Economic Lesson of the Day" by the Captain.
Now, everybody who is graduating would like jobs. And I know you may have been taught jobs come from Barack Obama's Magical Farting Unicorns and we'll just borrow a trillion dollars in some Keynesian thing and then the "pump will be primed" and then there will be a multiplier effect and then boom! Jobs!
But, I'm sorry kiddies. That's not how it works.
You see, you've been misled. The way I can tell is that (1) people in the general population think the government somehow has something to do with creating jobs. they say the "government must do SOMETHING" and (2) MB-freaking-A's can't even explain why they don't have jobs.
Both of which suggest to me you're working from an erroneous premise and that is that somehow the government is where jobs come from.
I've been meaning to make a post titled "The Great Liberal Economic Oort Cloud" (GLEOC) where liberals (and others) typically believe jobs come from government. The reason for the Oort Cloud metaphor is because they don't really know HOW jobs are created by government, but just assume that's where jobs come from. In reality, it is simply people being too intellectually lazy to think the economics of job creation through. They believe the government with its trillions of dollars and businesses and laws and lawyers and all these "really smart professional people" make this nice big "economic Oort cloud" and farts out jobs. It's not their concern how jobs are really created, it's all really too complicated for them to understand. Thank god we have Barack Obama and really smart Ivy Leaguers heading up the GLEOC!
But allow me to pose another theory (which isn't really a theory, it's reality). The Symbiotic Parasite Host Relationship Model (SPHRM).
You see, if you think about it, without an economy, without a people, without businesses, there is no need for government. If you have nothing to govern, then governments would not exist. Ergo, the GLEOC model is flawed because it puts the cart before the horse. If you believe in the GLEOC, then governments existed and people arose in response.
Obviously it's the reverse. With people, with a society, with an economy comes the need for it to be governed.
Therefore it is the government that lives off of the people and the economy.
Now, this FACT makes government a parasitic organization. It NEEDS a host. If there is no economy or society, there is no way a government can form on top of it. And this is not to say that government is bad or that were are using the word "parasitic" in the pejorative. It is needed and ergo why the relationship between the government and the economy is (or at least should be) symbiotic.
Symbiosis aside, the key thing is the SPHRM is correct in that it puts the horse before the cart. Therefore if you want job creation, guess what?
Yep, I'm sorry, that means you have to grow the private sector.
See, there is no public sector if there is no private sector because the private sector is the host the public sector needs. But if you look at how public sector has been crowding out the private sector you are seeing a parasite that has gone form just 3% the size of the host to now 40% (the chart below just shows federal spending, not state).
The host is frankly going into shock and dying.
Now, I know in college you were told by academians and government paid bureaucrats that you could all major in Puppies and Flowers and all get government jobs as "social workers" or "teachers" or "community organizers" or "government consultants" or become professors like them, but unfortunately that is following the GLEOC model. And the GLEOC model is not sustainable.
If you want jobs you have to grow the private sector. Which means doing things like;
1. ELIMINATING (not cut) ELIMINATING corporate taxes and BANNING THEM FOREVER
2. ELIMINATING (not cut) any form of capital gains or dividend taxes
3. Simplify the tax code.
4. Put limits on how large the parasite can grow as a percent of the economy
5. Scale down the size of the parasite itself so that the host may grow again
Of course (and this is where I spend most of my time now thinking and philosophizing about economics because this is really where the crux of this whole economics/political dynamic is being fought) what it funny is you've all been brainwashed from high school on to more or less hate the private sector. You hate "evil corporations." You hate "evil Corporate America." You hate "big oil." You're more than willing to vote more and more regulations to strangle the host. "Hey, let's all go green because it's cool!" "Yeaaa! Corporate Social Responsibility is the NEW MBA TREND!" You are all more or less programmed to be part of the parasite (or at least support the parasite) at the expense of the host.
And as I've been pushing the frontier of this particular philosophy out further, I've realized (sadly) you're so brainwashed no amount of reason, logic or plain ole facts and statistics are going to convince you otherwise. In other words, I've explained to you why you don't have jobs. I've explained to you how to get jobs. But you're so intellectually dishonest and weak your ego cannot sustain the fact you've been duped by previous generations. And since pride is now going to get in the way of truth, thereby condemning the host (and parasite might I add) to death, for me and my SPHRM-subscribing colleagues there's only one thing left to do;
Enjoy the Decline!
(oh! And buy my book which is on Kindle for 99 cents! Buying my book qualifies as enjoying the decline)
Friday, June 19, 2009
The Captain at 50!
Or perhaps more like "The Captain makes General."
Didn't know this guy existed, but isn't it interesting in how we've come to some of the same conclusions although we haven't met?
But I'm sure it's nothing.
Just keep contributing to that 401k kiddies!
Didn't know this guy existed, but isn't it interesting in how we've come to some of the same conclusions although we haven't met?
But I'm sure it's nothing.
Just keep contributing to that 401k kiddies!
The Future of the US Dollar
So I am cleaning, for it is good to clean, and in my effort to lessen the amount of junk I have, I stumbled upon some old Soviet (I think) currency, that no doubt is worthless, because, well, as the leftists in this nation are about to find out, a piece of paper is just a piece of paper unless you actually have some level of production behind it.
All that being said, does anybody know what i have here? I collected coins as a youth, but I know very little about currency.
All that being said, does anybody know what i have here? I collected coins as a youth, but I know very little about currency.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Economic Schadenfreude of the Day
Today's economic schadenfreude is a two-fer!
Denny Hecker, scumbag, burnt out, loser middle age man that never had any real business skill or acumen is not only raided by the authorities, but decides to sue GMAC, the company that has since shot me down for about 3 jobs, even though if they hired me the first time, they may not have needed a taxpayer bailout...but that assumes they would have listened to me over their quants. Regardless, when the Nazis show up to fight the Communists, you don't intervene. You crack open a beer and watch.
And now, Extended Stay hotels filing for bankruptcy. Not that I have a personal grudge with them, BUT I recall calling them about a month ago to see how much a 6 week rental in Rapid City would cost (as I am going on an extended vacation).
$6,000.
Rapid, Effing, City?
$6,000 for 6 weeks?
$1,000 a week?
That's like me charging $500 for my book (which incidentally you should buy!)
And you wonder why you are filing for chapter 11.
Denny Hecker, scumbag, burnt out, loser middle age man that never had any real business skill or acumen is not only raided by the authorities, but decides to sue GMAC, the company that has since shot me down for about 3 jobs, even though if they hired me the first time, they may not have needed a taxpayer bailout...but that assumes they would have listened to me over their quants. Regardless, when the Nazis show up to fight the Communists, you don't intervene. You crack open a beer and watch.
And now, Extended Stay hotels filing for bankruptcy. Not that I have a personal grudge with them, BUT I recall calling them about a month ago to see how much a 6 week rental in Rapid City would cost (as I am going on an extended vacation).
$6,000.
Rapid, Effing, City?
$6,000 for 6 weeks?
$1,000 a week?
That's like me charging $500 for my book (which incidentally you should buy!)
And you wonder why you are filing for chapter 11.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
What Do You Mean I Have to Wait Until 2014 to Get My Magic Obama Unicorn?
I've often said, "American's want their wars won just like they want their Big Mac's served. In under two minutes."
This was in response to the childish expectation that Iraq was going to be done and over with in 1 year and if it wasn't then by god we got to go out and protest! The same could be said for the Vietnam War, but then they were willing to accept their Big Macs served in about 5 minutes. We're just all that much more spoiled now.
But wait, just wait. For whereas we can tuck tail and run like so many leftists want us to do when it comes to foreign wars, we do NOT have that option when it comes to the economy. And while all the burnt out, spoiled brat, trust fund hippies and their equally spoiled Gen-X offspring "demand" the God Obama do something NOW about the economy, they're about to get a rude awakening in the the cold harsh world known as reality.
The economy is not coming back for at least 2 years, and in some areas (COUGH COUGH-democrat strongholds-HACK HACK!) not for 4-5 years. Nothing the government can do will change that. The economic problems of America are distinctly American and reside within the people. It is the American people with the problems who spend more than they make, never save anything for the future, and promise to themselves - through the government - things that can only be afforded by borrowing from the Chinese (which we have no intention nor capability of ever paying back).
Ergo, this coolio little interactive chart that will show you just how long it will take your friendly neighborhood to be not-so-economically-sucky!
Now I know, I know, Obama said he will change this. And I know, I know, you've been brought up all these years to believe in hope and change and social security and unicorns and Santa Claus and sociology degrees landing you a job. But what you're about to find out is that your entire economic philosophy and ideology of how the real world works is horribly flawed and wrong. It is so far from the real world that only the utter collapse and failure of your beliefs when put into practice like somebody like Obama will wake you up to the realities you face.
In the meantime, I wouldn't hold your breath for "hope and change." 2014 is a long time to hold your breath till.
This was in response to the childish expectation that Iraq was going to be done and over with in 1 year and if it wasn't then by god we got to go out and protest! The same could be said for the Vietnam War, but then they were willing to accept their Big Macs served in about 5 minutes. We're just all that much more spoiled now.
But wait, just wait. For whereas we can tuck tail and run like so many leftists want us to do when it comes to foreign wars, we do NOT have that option when it comes to the economy. And while all the burnt out, spoiled brat, trust fund hippies and their equally spoiled Gen-X offspring "demand" the God Obama do something NOW about the economy, they're about to get a rude awakening in the the cold harsh world known as reality.
The economy is not coming back for at least 2 years, and in some areas (COUGH COUGH-democrat strongholds-HACK HACK!) not for 4-5 years. Nothing the government can do will change that. The economic problems of America are distinctly American and reside within the people. It is the American people with the problems who spend more than they make, never save anything for the future, and promise to themselves - through the government - things that can only be afforded by borrowing from the Chinese (which we have no intention nor capability of ever paying back).
Ergo, this coolio little interactive chart that will show you just how long it will take your friendly neighborhood to be not-so-economically-sucky!
Now I know, I know, Obama said he will change this. And I know, I know, you've been brought up all these years to believe in hope and change and social security and unicorns and Santa Claus and sociology degrees landing you a job. But what you're about to find out is that your entire economic philosophy and ideology of how the real world works is horribly flawed and wrong. It is so far from the real world that only the utter collapse and failure of your beliefs when put into practice like somebody like Obama will wake you up to the realities you face.
In the meantime, I wouldn't hold your breath for "hope and change." 2014 is a long time to hold your breath till.
Hold Off on Paypal Donations
Hi All,
If you were planning on clicking on Natasha and donating to your good ol' Captain, just hold off.
They make setting up an account as about as easy as launching the space shuttle during a hurricane.
I will let you know when the account is functional, in the meantime just save all those billions before you donate them to the Captain.
If you were planning on clicking on Natasha and donating to your good ol' Captain, just hold off.
They make setting up an account as about as easy as launching the space shuttle during a hurricane.
I will let you know when the account is functional, in the meantime just save all those billions before you donate them to the Captain.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Invest in Anything BUT The US Dollar
Manure, sawdust, rocks, sticks.
Something with real tangible value.
Al Gore can suck on this hockey stick.
ht to Cjunk at SDA
Something with real tangible value.
Al Gore can suck on this hockey stick.
ht to Cjunk at SDA
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Vacation Bible School
When I am king, which I will be, one of the many things I will do is ban Vacation Bible School.
It is summer and the poor kids have been cooped up in nothing short of a mental prison known as school and what do you do?
Send them back to the exact same thing,but with a religious spin.
OK, parents, listen to me.
Do you NOT remember school?
Do you NOT remember church?
Do you remember EITHER of those being enjoyable experiences when you were a kid?
Seriously, I may not like children, but I look out for their interests more than most people realize.
Post Script!!! - I have actually uncovered some footage from my youth when I was actually in vacation bible school! I put it on You Tube, you can see it here;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkwmIDx9RwQ&feature=player_embedded
It is summer and the poor kids have been cooped up in nothing short of a mental prison known as school and what do you do?
Send them back to the exact same thing,but with a religious spin.
OK, parents, listen to me.
Do you NOT remember school?
Do you NOT remember church?
Do you remember EITHER of those being enjoyable experiences when you were a kid?
Seriously, I may not like children, but I look out for their interests more than most people realize.
Post Script!!! - I have actually uncovered some footage from my youth when I was actually in vacation bible school! I put it on You Tube, you can see it here;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkwmIDx9RwQ&feature=player_embedded
Friday, June 12, 2009
How Much Debt Will Gen X Have to Pay
For all of you young kids (and by that I mean people my age) who drive around with Obama bumper stickers;
But hey, at least you were "cool" voting for Obama. Yeah, that's worth enslaving your children. I can see the conversation now.
Child of Gen X'er - "Dad, why do I only get to keep only 30% of my income?"
Aged Gen X'er - "Because I was cool in 2008 and voted for Obama!"
Child of Gen X'er - "Yeah, but this is kind of like slavery."
Aged Gen X'er - "Quit being so racist and eat your government financed organic green bran muffin!"
But hey, at least you were "cool" voting for Obama. Yeah, that's worth enslaving your children. I can see the conversation now.
Child of Gen X'er - "Dad, why do I only get to keep only 30% of my income?"
Aged Gen X'er - "Because I was cool in 2008 and voted for Obama!"
Child of Gen X'er - "Yeah, but this is kind of like slavery."
Aged Gen X'er - "Quit being so racist and eat your government financed organic green bran muffin!"
Thursday, June 11, 2009
The Captain's Babes
Happy day fellow Cappy Cap readers!
As you may have noticed I have spruced the place up considerably by adding some photos of the femme fatale persuasion in the side bar. These are sweet, kind enough ladies who have agreed to help advertise Cappy Cap and various aspects of the blog with their beauty and gorgeous looks.
There will be more to come, but thus far I have a link to the book and a recently set up Pay Pal account for anybody feeling charitable enough to make a donation to the Cappy Cap Fund (the proceeds of which go to things like the mortgage, gas, Rumpleminze and video games).
In any case please feel free to click away, (besides which, you will hurt their feelings if you don't click on them! ;)
As you may have noticed I have spruced the place up considerably by adding some photos of the femme fatale persuasion in the side bar. These are sweet, kind enough ladies who have agreed to help advertise Cappy Cap and various aspects of the blog with their beauty and gorgeous looks.
There will be more to come, but thus far I have a link to the book and a recently set up Pay Pal account for anybody feeling charitable enough to make a donation to the Cappy Cap Fund (the proceeds of which go to things like the mortgage, gas, Rumpleminze and video games).
In any case please feel free to click away, (besides which, you will hurt their feelings if you don't click on them! ;)
The Captain Seeks Your Advice
Hi All,
I am contemplating opening up an investment company where I would manage people's money. I am most serious about this endeavor, if for any other reason I think people are fed up with the slick talking financial advisors and would appreciate an honest investment advisor/manager whose motto will be;
"I promise you nothing."
Besides which I can certainly do better than Bernie Madoff or any of those other now-bankrupt Wall Street morons.
Regardless, I would very much appreciate all my readers' advice before I commit the resources, time and energy into setting this up, primarily whether or not any of you would even consider using me as an advisor (as this blog would be the initial and primary means by which I would advertise such services).
Thoughts, opinions, advice, commentary?
I am contemplating opening up an investment company where I would manage people's money. I am most serious about this endeavor, if for any other reason I think people are fed up with the slick talking financial advisors and would appreciate an honest investment advisor/manager whose motto will be;
"I promise you nothing."
Besides which I can certainly do better than Bernie Madoff or any of those other now-bankrupt Wall Street morons.
Regardless, I would very much appreciate all my readers' advice before I commit the resources, time and energy into setting this up, primarily whether or not any of you would even consider using me as an advisor (as this blog would be the initial and primary means by which I would advertise such services).
Thoughts, opinions, advice, commentary?
Success of Obama's Stimulus Plan
Often, leftists, more than conservatives, argue that
"If we hadn't done what we did, it would have been WORSE than what it is now."
And I find it the weakest argument ever. Instead of admit failure, they brainwash the idiotic American public into actually believing that it would have been WORSE and they should be thankful our politicians failed. Alas, Obama is no different;
But, wait, let me guess, "It would have been EVEN WORSE than what they originally predicted?"
Morons.
ht
"If we hadn't done what we did, it would have been WORSE than what it is now."
And I find it the weakest argument ever. Instead of admit failure, they brainwash the idiotic American public into actually believing that it would have been WORSE and they should be thankful our politicians failed. Alas, Obama is no different;
But, wait, let me guess, "It would have been EVEN WORSE than what they originally predicted?"
Morons.
ht
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Why China Should Be Worried
Inflation equals the difference between;
The amount of stuff you produce in a given period of time
AND
The amount of money you printed off in that same given period of time
It is very simple. I've alluded to it before back in 2006, but that is basically all inflation is.
How much you produce, versus how much money you printed to buy all that you produced.
If you produce A LOT of goods and you do not increase the money supply, well then the value of the the dollars that are already existing goes up, in that those are the only dollars that can buy all the goods in the economy. However, if you print off a ton of money, WITHOUT a proportionate increase in the amount of goods you produce in an economy, well that's MORE dollars chasing after fewer goods.
The second scenario is the one we face today.
With Our Lord Obama printing off money like there's no tomorrow;
with the compensatory collapse in RGDP growth (on track to decrease by about 6% this year) we have a very simple "numerator/denominator" relationship that bodes ill for the nation;
The numerator (money supply) is going up.
While the denominator (RGDP growth) is going down.
Which will result in inflation.
The question is how much and I say 14%. Simply because we've printed off 14% more money than we've produced goods. The numbers behind my figures are thus;
Below is a bit messy of a chart showing the annual YOY (year over year) change in the money supply (measured by M1) versus the YOY change in RGDP. The difference between the two is the yellow line which should more or less correlate with inflation, and the current day difference between our production and money supply is 14%, thus the prediction.
However, as you see below, this inflation has not yet materialized. The yellow line (now blue) when correlated against actual inflation numbers does show a strong correlation historically. However, this correlation dissolves the closer and closer we get to 2009, the last data point actually showing DEFLATION rather than the predicted 14% inflation.
Why the difference?
The answer; just wait.
Understand that inflation really is that simple. The more money you have chasing fewer goods will, MATHEMATICALLY, TO THE PENNY result in a very precise amount of inflation. It has to. The only reason it has not yet is because of two factors;
1. Asset bubbles- Investment assets such as housing and stocks do not go into the CPI/inflation calculation. This goes a long way in explaning the deterioration of the relationship between the yellow line and reported inflation since our last two bubbles have been in HOUSING and STOCKS. Had housing and stocks been incorporated into the CPI I guarantee you you would have had a much stronger correlation.
2. "Mopping up excess liquidity." - That phrase should be the "Saying of 2009." It's basically the government saying, "holy crap Batman, we got a TON of money floating around. If it gets into the real economy, we are going to have inflation that will make Mugabe look fiscally austere." Ergo, impotent measures such as "the Fed buying up all the toxic assets" or "issuing Fed bonds" or other such BS. Do what you want to "mop up excess liquidity" short of destroying dollars, those dollars are still there and will either make their way into the US economy (triggering inflation in the CPI) or remain in bubbles (housing, low interest bonds, etc.)
Regardless, in the end, this glut of money will inevitably make its way into the economy and will, by default, trigger inflation.
However, all hope is not lost. There is one solution to help resolve this weak dollar/inflation situation. We could boost the denominator of the Money Supply/GDP ratio. We could actually produce the GDP necessary to give those excess dollars out there some kind of value or worth.
Of course this would require lowering our corporate taxes below 40% to attact capital and investment here....and it would require lowering personal taxes so people once again have an incentive to work...and that would be assuming young Americans would be willing to work hard and long hours in productive fields such as computers, engineering or science which would require math...and practically nobody majoring in sociology or philosophy...and maybe the baby boomers could postpone retirement until they're 70 thereby shoring up the government finances...and people would have to take second jobs or maybe start a side business instead of watching American Idol...
You know on second thought, maybe it would just be easier to short the US dollar and invest in China.
The amount of stuff you produce in a given period of time
AND
The amount of money you printed off in that same given period of time
It is very simple. I've alluded to it before back in 2006, but that is basically all inflation is.
How much you produce, versus how much money you printed to buy all that you produced.
If you produce A LOT of goods and you do not increase the money supply, well then the value of the the dollars that are already existing goes up, in that those are the only dollars that can buy all the goods in the economy. However, if you print off a ton of money, WITHOUT a proportionate increase in the amount of goods you produce in an economy, well that's MORE dollars chasing after fewer goods.
The second scenario is the one we face today.
With Our Lord Obama printing off money like there's no tomorrow;
with the compensatory collapse in RGDP growth (on track to decrease by about 6% this year) we have a very simple "numerator/denominator" relationship that bodes ill for the nation;
The numerator (money supply) is going up.
While the denominator (RGDP growth) is going down.
Which will result in inflation.
The question is how much and I say 14%. Simply because we've printed off 14% more money than we've produced goods. The numbers behind my figures are thus;
Below is a bit messy of a chart showing the annual YOY (year over year) change in the money supply (measured by M1) versus the YOY change in RGDP. The difference between the two is the yellow line which should more or less correlate with inflation, and the current day difference between our production and money supply is 14%, thus the prediction.
However, as you see below, this inflation has not yet materialized. The yellow line (now blue) when correlated against actual inflation numbers does show a strong correlation historically. However, this correlation dissolves the closer and closer we get to 2009, the last data point actually showing DEFLATION rather than the predicted 14% inflation.
Why the difference?
The answer; just wait.
Understand that inflation really is that simple. The more money you have chasing fewer goods will, MATHEMATICALLY, TO THE PENNY result in a very precise amount of inflation. It has to. The only reason it has not yet is because of two factors;
1. Asset bubbles- Investment assets such as housing and stocks do not go into the CPI/inflation calculation. This goes a long way in explaning the deterioration of the relationship between the yellow line and reported inflation since our last two bubbles have been in HOUSING and STOCKS. Had housing and stocks been incorporated into the CPI I guarantee you you would have had a much stronger correlation.
2. "Mopping up excess liquidity." - That phrase should be the "Saying of 2009." It's basically the government saying, "holy crap Batman, we got a TON of money floating around. If it gets into the real economy, we are going to have inflation that will make Mugabe look fiscally austere." Ergo, impotent measures such as "the Fed buying up all the toxic assets" or "issuing Fed bonds" or other such BS. Do what you want to "mop up excess liquidity" short of destroying dollars, those dollars are still there and will either make their way into the US economy (triggering inflation in the CPI) or remain in bubbles (housing, low interest bonds, etc.)
Regardless, in the end, this glut of money will inevitably make its way into the economy and will, by default, trigger inflation.
However, all hope is not lost. There is one solution to help resolve this weak dollar/inflation situation. We could boost the denominator of the Money Supply/GDP ratio. We could actually produce the GDP necessary to give those excess dollars out there some kind of value or worth.
Of course this would require lowering our corporate taxes below 40% to attact capital and investment here....and it would require lowering personal taxes so people once again have an incentive to work...and that would be assuming young Americans would be willing to work hard and long hours in productive fields such as computers, engineering or science which would require math...and practically nobody majoring in sociology or philosophy...and maybe the baby boomers could postpone retirement until they're 70 thereby shoring up the government finances...and people would have to take second jobs or maybe start a side business instead of watching American Idol...
You know on second thought, maybe it would just be easier to short the US dollar and invest in China.
Global Warming My Ass
From Kate. This is what it looks like in Montana today.
Global warming, my sweet little, perfectly sculpted, highly sought after, and much-looked-at-by-the-ladies ass.
Global warming, my sweet little, perfectly sculpted, highly sought after, and much-looked-at-by-the-ladies ass.
It's Because the Government Doesn't Produce Anything
Understand this, and understand it well.
The government and the American people have a parasite-host relationship. The American people are the host, the government is the parasite. Now this relation can be symbiotic, in which the parasite actually does help out the host, however, that was abandoned quite a long time ago and the government (and it's employees, and special interest groups and career politicians) live off the American people.
Unfortunately the parasites do not realize that they can only thrive as long as the host does and their infection, if it gets too big, will kill off the host, leaving them a rotting carcass and thusly, they will die too (just look at the unions and the auto industry). This seems to be the case, because, well frankly, the parasites, no matter how many degrees they have from the Ivy League, are morons;
Enjoy the good times ahead!
ht to Robert!
The government and the American people have a parasite-host relationship. The American people are the host, the government is the parasite. Now this relation can be symbiotic, in which the parasite actually does help out the host, however, that was abandoned quite a long time ago and the government (and it's employees, and special interest groups and career politicians) live off the American people.
Unfortunately the parasites do not realize that they can only thrive as long as the host does and their infection, if it gets too big, will kill off the host, leaving them a rotting carcass and thusly, they will die too (just look at the unions and the auto industry). This seems to be the case, because, well frankly, the parasites, no matter how many degrees they have from the Ivy League, are morons;
Enjoy the good times ahead!
ht to Robert!
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Recession Medicine
"She's a fancy stepper when she dances
Go and see her as she kippers and prances
My gal don't do much talking
Dances even when she's walking
(Jones ad libs) One and two and three and four she dances all day long
(Bugs) Oh my gal is a high part stepper
Ginger with salt and pepper
She's a fancy stepper when she dances
Go and see her as she kippers and prance"
I Think I Speak for the Rest of the Responsible Adults in This Country When I Say...
Who gives a sh!t?
Why is this newsworthy and being publicized all over the news?
Sunday, June 07, 2009
Why You Have Bad Government
This is arguably going to be the most important post of my entire blog, so please pay attention.
The below chart is confusing.
The reason it is confusing is because there are many different types of majors that it is hard to see any kind of trend or relationship. But if I simplify it into the chart below;
Now you start to see where I'm going with this.
The two charts above are simply a breakdown of the House of Representatives in the state of Minnesota by major. I further simplified the chart into "Worthy Degrees" and "Worthless Freaking Crap." And for the sake of informing my readers I defined "Worthy Degrees" as degrees that would actually have some kind of net positive benefit to society and "Worthless Freaking Crap" as degrees rich spoiled kids pursue as a hobby with no real intention of ever finding a real job, but just an excuse to go and chase tail for 4 - 6 years during your twenties. They break down thusly;
Worthy degrees;
Math
Nursing
Agriculture
Engineering
Biology
Economics
POLICE Science/Criminology
Votech
Physics
IT
Worthless degrees;
Business
Education
Poli Sci
Sociology
Pre-Law
English
Geography
Philosophy
Psychology
Communications
History
Journalism
Environmental Studies
Music/Arts
Foreign Language
General Studies
Rhetoric
Broadcasting
Home and Community Services
Metropolitan and Urban Studies
Fashion Merchandising
(*note, "business majors" were considered worthless as they were either general business, HR, or marketing, none of which are real degrees. Interestingly enough NO ACCOUNTING majors were listed...which goes a long way in explaining why the budget is always out of balance).
Now the reason I bring this up and point this out is that while it is as clear as day to me why we have incompetent government and incompetent legislatures across this nation, it seems to be the ever elusive question as to "Why can't we just have competent government? Why do we have such bad government."
So allow me to tender you a "theory" (which I already know to be law and will bet my life on it) as to why, not just here in Minnesota, we have incompetent morons in government, but why across the entire nation, as well as the entire western world we all suffer an unacceptable level of incompetent government.
UNDERSTAND that the VAST majority of people who go into government do not originally set out to do so. THey are a by-product of their own laziness and abhorrence to engage in real work or engage in any meaningful activity that will result in REAL, TANGIBLE PRODUCTION for society.
THIS MANIFESTS ITSELF when they are young and have to choose what kind of career they are going to pursue.
NOW UNDERSTAND that the past roughly 2-3 generations have benefited from the massive fruits of capitalism that have made it possible that you really don't HAVE to work if you don't want to. Your parents are rich enough to carry you through, and though you may not be a veritable trust fund baby, you can essentially major in fluff and get by if you so desire. This results in the decision, by what is essentially 18 year old children to major in a subject that is NOT in their best long term career interests, but something that is more of a luxury or hobby and suits their childish, short term desires (on a related note see this).
THE SINGLE MOST DETERMINING VARIABLE AS TO WHAT THESE LAZY SPOILED CHILDREN CHOOSE AS A MAJOR IS MATHEMATICS. The MORE math a major has, the LESS likely these lazy slobs are to pick it as a major. Ergo, they are not majoring in a discipline or study that actually will produce something of worth to society, they choose to major in a hobby that requires little to no math simply because math is difficult.
Now, in due time, those with real degrees and real disciplines will go out and find REAL work that will produce real goods and services society desires. Oh, sure I know, the sociology major will tell you they contribute to society by helping the poor. And the environmentalist major will tell you he's saving the planet. But the empirical evidence, known as MONEY, tells you something different. Sure, the effeminate "global studies" major will tell you he's saving the planet, but he spends all of his money on his I-Pod, cell phone and Prius, ALL OF WHICH WAS CONCEIVED, DESIGNED and BUILT BY THE REAL MEN (also known as "engineers.") Regardless, the point is those with worthless freaking el-crapo degrees will find no obvious employment and are thus relegated to a few employment options.
Some will become euphemistically named "Barristas" at coffee shops.
Some will actually do something of economic value and flip burgers.
Others will just marry and engineer and work part time as a "social worker."
And a disproportionate amount of them will enter public education.
But there is one other venue of employment for these talentless and worthless souls and that is government.
Now understand, not everybody can run for government. The natural laws of economics will ensure that those foolish enough to major in "English" IN A COUNTRY WHERE IT'S THE NATIONAL FREAKING LANGUAGE will inevitably become unemployed (though very verbose). However, if you have rich parents or well connected parents, you now have the funds to run for public office.
Allow me to point out just a couple bits of anecdotal evidence.
Humphrey. I know Hubert H was the original Humphrey, but hey, look at Jr. Why, daddy's little boy is so damn bored, he guesses he'll just run for public office.
Mark Dayton. Awwww. The little Heir to the Dayton's empire is bored. Good thing Grand Daddy stored away $22 million for you. Go buy yourself a senate seat!
Nancy Pelosi. Daddy's little girl. And when I say "Daddy" I mean the former mayor of Baltimore (that urban utopia). Do you really think she had to pay her way through college to get that political "science" degree. Wow, for an "independent woman" she really depending on a rich dad and a rich husband. And I don't think she started in the mail room to work up that wealth.
Al Gore. Wasn't his daddy a senator?
And just to show you I'm not slamming on just democrats, this criticism EQUALLY is laid on Repulicans as well;
George W. Bush. Well Jesus, H Christ, we'll prove to the nation we're not a group of elitists! We'll nominate THE SON OF A PREVIOUS FREAKING PRESIDENT!
It is here that those who are by all accounts and standards morons can run for elected office, which practically guarantees that you will have BAD GOVERNMENT.
And the reason is simple;
1. Rich people are shielded from the everyday struggles and strife that normal, even poor people face and therefore cannot sympathize. However, even more important is
2. They NEVER HAD TO FACE REALITY. THEY HAVE NO CLUE WHAT THE REAL WORLD IS. And therefore cannot make effective decisions or policies because it is based in the utopian idealism afforded to them by the parents and not the harsh real world the remaining 95% of the population live in.
A very common criticism by talk radio show hosts such as Jason Lewis and Rush Limbaugh is that NONE OF THESE GUYS EVER HAD TO MAKE A PAYROLL. Barack Obama, for all his cuteness and nice pecks and pretty words and pet unicorns, never worked a real job in his life. His mom paid for everything. He never had to strive. He has as much in common with the poor on the south side of Chicago as Jesse Jackson does. The same applies to the Humphries, the Bushes, the Pelosi's and practically every publicly elected official out there.
THEY DON'T LIVE IN REALITY BECAUSE THEIR PARENTS MONEY SHIELDS THEM FROM IT.
Furthermore, AND THIS IS KEY SO YOU UNDERSTAND, they do not choose to go into public office for anything as "noble" as "public service."
They go into it for themselves.
They are bored.
They are otherwise unemployable.
And (you MUST UNDERSTAND THIS) they are better that you. They aren't going to dirty their fingers working manual labor.
They aren't going to work the third shift as a security guard to make ends meet.
They aren't going to change diapers in hopsice care.
Why, "they have a college degree in philosophy. Why, that work is for the underclasses. Certianly not an "educated, elightened" person like me!"
They go into public office FIRST AND FOREMOST for themselves and NOTHING as noble as public service.
In short they are politicians, they are NOT statesmen. They put themselves first and will tell you whatever you want to here to keep them in office.
This is why you have bad government. Because NONE of these politicians want to do what's good for the state or the nation. They just want to do what's going to keep them in office and away from REAL work for as long as possible. This is why you get idiots parroting things like;
"Hope and change."
and
"We'll bail you out of this mortgage crisis."
and
"Don't worry, we can print off money and everything will be alright."
Of course, the real problem isn't the politicians. You will always have scammers and scumbags who wish to live off the population without providing anything else in return. The real problem is the American population. Such a spoiled, uneducated, uninformed, ignorant bunchs of brats. 300 million people who'd rather watch "American Idol" or see some moron swing a wood stick at a sphere and then run around a diamond while their entire country and livehlihood is stolen from underneathe their noses. Veritable children who borrow more money than they could ever hope to pay back and then blame their ensuing financial woes on a presidential administration. Genuine, USDA 100% certified dumbasses who vote for candidates because they say pretty words and promise them cake, bread and circuses, while completely oblivious to the impending financial disaster of social security and medicare which will make this housing "debacle" look like a joke.
Sadly there is nothing that can be done about it, because how do you defeat ignorance on such a grand scale. The only thing that will defeat it is when the children who are now currently in government run this country into the ground so fast and so destructively that we're no longer able to feed ourselves and will have to entertain euthenasia as a viable means by which to keep the economy from truly collapsing.
In the meantime, I hope you enjoy your cute little hobby majoring in "Rhetoric," "Metro and Urban Studies," and "Home and Community Service" (all of which were REAL majors "earned" by current house of representative members). Yeah, THAT will get us out of the recession!
POST SCRIPT - FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE CLAIMING THE CHART ADDS UP TO 135%, PLEASE NOTE THAT IT SHOWS THE NOMINAL NUMBER AND THEN THE PERCENTAGE
The below chart is confusing.
The reason it is confusing is because there are many different types of majors that it is hard to see any kind of trend or relationship. But if I simplify it into the chart below;
Now you start to see where I'm going with this.
The two charts above are simply a breakdown of the House of Representatives in the state of Minnesota by major. I further simplified the chart into "Worthy Degrees" and "Worthless Freaking Crap." And for the sake of informing my readers I defined "Worthy Degrees" as degrees that would actually have some kind of net positive benefit to society and "Worthless Freaking Crap" as degrees rich spoiled kids pursue as a hobby with no real intention of ever finding a real job, but just an excuse to go and chase tail for 4 - 6 years during your twenties. They break down thusly;
Worthy degrees;
Math
Nursing
Agriculture
Engineering
Biology
Economics
POLICE Science/Criminology
Votech
Physics
IT
Worthless degrees;
Business
Education
Poli Sci
Sociology
Pre-Law
English
Geography
Philosophy
Psychology
Communications
History
Journalism
Environmental Studies
Music/Arts
Foreign Language
General Studies
Rhetoric
Broadcasting
Home and Community Services
Metropolitan and Urban Studies
Fashion Merchandising
(*note, "business majors" were considered worthless as they were either general business, HR, or marketing, none of which are real degrees. Interestingly enough NO ACCOUNTING majors were listed...which goes a long way in explaining why the budget is always out of balance).
Now the reason I bring this up and point this out is that while it is as clear as day to me why we have incompetent government and incompetent legislatures across this nation, it seems to be the ever elusive question as to "Why can't we just have competent government? Why do we have such bad government."
So allow me to tender you a "theory" (which I already know to be law and will bet my life on it) as to why, not just here in Minnesota, we have incompetent morons in government, but why across the entire nation, as well as the entire western world we all suffer an unacceptable level of incompetent government.
UNDERSTAND that the VAST majority of people who go into government do not originally set out to do so. THey are a by-product of their own laziness and abhorrence to engage in real work or engage in any meaningful activity that will result in REAL, TANGIBLE PRODUCTION for society.
THIS MANIFESTS ITSELF when they are young and have to choose what kind of career they are going to pursue.
NOW UNDERSTAND that the past roughly 2-3 generations have benefited from the massive fruits of capitalism that have made it possible that you really don't HAVE to work if you don't want to. Your parents are rich enough to carry you through, and though you may not be a veritable trust fund baby, you can essentially major in fluff and get by if you so desire. This results in the decision, by what is essentially 18 year old children to major in a subject that is NOT in their best long term career interests, but something that is more of a luxury or hobby and suits their childish, short term desires (on a related note see this).
THE SINGLE MOST DETERMINING VARIABLE AS TO WHAT THESE LAZY SPOILED CHILDREN CHOOSE AS A MAJOR IS MATHEMATICS. The MORE math a major has, the LESS likely these lazy slobs are to pick it as a major. Ergo, they are not majoring in a discipline or study that actually will produce something of worth to society, they choose to major in a hobby that requires little to no math simply because math is difficult.
Now, in due time, those with real degrees and real disciplines will go out and find REAL work that will produce real goods and services society desires. Oh, sure I know, the sociology major will tell you they contribute to society by helping the poor. And the environmentalist major will tell you he's saving the planet. But the empirical evidence, known as MONEY, tells you something different. Sure, the effeminate "global studies" major will tell you he's saving the planet, but he spends all of his money on his I-Pod, cell phone and Prius, ALL OF WHICH WAS CONCEIVED, DESIGNED and BUILT BY THE REAL MEN (also known as "engineers.") Regardless, the point is those with worthless freaking el-crapo degrees will find no obvious employment and are thus relegated to a few employment options.
Some will become euphemistically named "Barristas" at coffee shops.
Some will actually do something of economic value and flip burgers.
Others will just marry and engineer and work part time as a "social worker."
And a disproportionate amount of them will enter public education.
But there is one other venue of employment for these talentless and worthless souls and that is government.
Now understand, not everybody can run for government. The natural laws of economics will ensure that those foolish enough to major in "English" IN A COUNTRY WHERE IT'S THE NATIONAL FREAKING LANGUAGE will inevitably become unemployed (though very verbose). However, if you have rich parents or well connected parents, you now have the funds to run for public office.
Allow me to point out just a couple bits of anecdotal evidence.
Humphrey. I know Hubert H was the original Humphrey, but hey, look at Jr. Why, daddy's little boy is so damn bored, he guesses he'll just run for public office.
Mark Dayton. Awwww. The little Heir to the Dayton's empire is bored. Good thing Grand Daddy stored away $22 million for you. Go buy yourself a senate seat!
Nancy Pelosi. Daddy's little girl. And when I say "Daddy" I mean the former mayor of Baltimore (that urban utopia). Do you really think she had to pay her way through college to get that political "science" degree. Wow, for an "independent woman" she really depending on a rich dad and a rich husband. And I don't think she started in the mail room to work up that wealth.
Al Gore. Wasn't his daddy a senator?
And just to show you I'm not slamming on just democrats, this criticism EQUALLY is laid on Repulicans as well;
George W. Bush. Well Jesus, H Christ, we'll prove to the nation we're not a group of elitists! We'll nominate THE SON OF A PREVIOUS FREAKING PRESIDENT!
It is here that those who are by all accounts and standards morons can run for elected office, which practically guarantees that you will have BAD GOVERNMENT.
And the reason is simple;
1. Rich people are shielded from the everyday struggles and strife that normal, even poor people face and therefore cannot sympathize. However, even more important is
2. They NEVER HAD TO FACE REALITY. THEY HAVE NO CLUE WHAT THE REAL WORLD IS. And therefore cannot make effective decisions or policies because it is based in the utopian idealism afforded to them by the parents and not the harsh real world the remaining 95% of the population live in.
A very common criticism by talk radio show hosts such as Jason Lewis and Rush Limbaugh is that NONE OF THESE GUYS EVER HAD TO MAKE A PAYROLL. Barack Obama, for all his cuteness and nice pecks and pretty words and pet unicorns, never worked a real job in his life. His mom paid for everything. He never had to strive. He has as much in common with the poor on the south side of Chicago as Jesse Jackson does. The same applies to the Humphries, the Bushes, the Pelosi's and practically every publicly elected official out there.
THEY DON'T LIVE IN REALITY BECAUSE THEIR PARENTS MONEY SHIELDS THEM FROM IT.
Furthermore, AND THIS IS KEY SO YOU UNDERSTAND, they do not choose to go into public office for anything as "noble" as "public service."
They go into it for themselves.
They are bored.
They are otherwise unemployable.
And (you MUST UNDERSTAND THIS) they are better that you. They aren't going to dirty their fingers working manual labor.
They aren't going to work the third shift as a security guard to make ends meet.
They aren't going to change diapers in hopsice care.
Why, "they have a college degree in philosophy. Why, that work is for the underclasses. Certianly not an "educated, elightened" person like me!"
They go into public office FIRST AND FOREMOST for themselves and NOTHING as noble as public service.
In short they are politicians, they are NOT statesmen. They put themselves first and will tell you whatever you want to here to keep them in office.
This is why you have bad government. Because NONE of these politicians want to do what's good for the state or the nation. They just want to do what's going to keep them in office and away from REAL work for as long as possible. This is why you get idiots parroting things like;
"Hope and change."
and
"We'll bail you out of this mortgage crisis."
and
"Don't worry, we can print off money and everything will be alright."
Of course, the real problem isn't the politicians. You will always have scammers and scumbags who wish to live off the population without providing anything else in return. The real problem is the American population. Such a spoiled, uneducated, uninformed, ignorant bunchs of brats. 300 million people who'd rather watch "American Idol" or see some moron swing a wood stick at a sphere and then run around a diamond while their entire country and livehlihood is stolen from underneathe their noses. Veritable children who borrow more money than they could ever hope to pay back and then blame their ensuing financial woes on a presidential administration. Genuine, USDA 100% certified dumbasses who vote for candidates because they say pretty words and promise them cake, bread and circuses, while completely oblivious to the impending financial disaster of social security and medicare which will make this housing "debacle" look like a joke.
Sadly there is nothing that can be done about it, because how do you defeat ignorance on such a grand scale. The only thing that will defeat it is when the children who are now currently in government run this country into the ground so fast and so destructively that we're no longer able to feed ourselves and will have to entertain euthenasia as a viable means by which to keep the economy from truly collapsing.
In the meantime, I hope you enjoy your cute little hobby majoring in "Rhetoric," "Metro and Urban Studies," and "Home and Community Service" (all of which were REAL majors "earned" by current house of representative members). Yeah, THAT will get us out of the recession!
POST SCRIPT - FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE CLAIMING THE CHART ADDS UP TO 135%, PLEASE NOTE THAT IT SHOWS THE NOMINAL NUMBER AND THEN THE PERCENTAGE
Another Reason NOT to Buy The Economist
As you know, The "Economist" (note parentheses) has more or less abandoned its namesake and become another bland, boring, left of center rag. I now find pot-smoking ex-hippies reading it and whereas before in my youthful 20's, would have found a girl quite attractive for reading The "Economist" I see it today as the fake and faux fashionable trend of "going green."
"Look at me!!! I'm fashionable! I drive Prius! I use reusable bags at the grocery store. I read the Economist! I'm intelligent! I have a degree in liberal arts! See, see! LOOK AT ME!!!!"
A shinny new nickel (AND I WILL MAIL IT TO YOU REGARDLESS OF YOUR LOCALE) to whoever can point out the TRUE GAPING AND MISSING VARIABLE The (ahem, COUGH COUGH, WHEEZE, WHEEZE) "Economist" failed to contribute the drop in greenhouse gas emissions from 2007-2008.
Anyone, anyone?
Bueller? Bueller?
"Look at me!!! I'm fashionable! I drive Prius! I use reusable bags at the grocery store. I read the Economist! I'm intelligent! I have a degree in liberal arts! See, see! LOOK AT ME!!!!"
A shinny new nickel (AND I WILL MAIL IT TO YOU REGARDLESS OF YOUR LOCALE) to whoever can point out the TRUE GAPING AND MISSING VARIABLE The (ahem, COUGH COUGH, WHEEZE, WHEEZE) "Economist" failed to contribute the drop in greenhouse gas emissions from 2007-2008.
Anyone, anyone?
Bueller? Bueller?
Friday, June 05, 2009
Pelosi vs. Cheney
What really should be taken from this is that for every person that "hates" Cheney there is an equal or greater amount that hates Pelosi. ie-there still are some real, conservative Americans out there who like capitalism and love America, and we're not all driving Priuses and majoring in political science.
Job Losses in May
My ill-striken observations are such;
1. This is just proof that the government and parties interested in government (teacher's unions, SIEU, government workers in general) HAVE NOT SACRIFICED ANYWHERE NEAR THEIR SHARE DURING THIS RECESSION. I don't want to hear any BS about the "horrible" cutbacks government workers are having to "endure." You should be ashamed of such hypocrisy while every one else is suffering.
2. Wait, wait, wait. Let me guess. "It's Bush's fault?"
3. Listening to Joe Biden and he said (I am paraphrasing):
"There is hope. The last four months job losses have not been as bad as we had expected."
Yes, yes, "I have good news Mr. Jones. The cancer is not spreading aggressively as it was before."
"So it's in remission?"
"Oh, heavens no! It's still spreading like a wildfire, just not as fast as last month. We've increased the time you have to live from 3 weeks to 3 weeks, 2 days."
"Oh, thank you President Obama!"
Thursday, June 04, 2009
El Capitain is Taken Ill
Hi All,
I'm really ill. Normally illness doesn't prevent me from making posts, but this is so bad it really takes effort to type.
More posts will come, but they may be more of a link/copy paste, than new material.
My apologies in advance.
If any of you wish to send me material of your own, I would be more than happy to post it in that it would save me time and I do genuinely appreciate it when you guys send me stuff.
El Cap-i-tan
I'm really ill. Normally illness doesn't prevent me from making posts, but this is so bad it really takes effort to type.
More posts will come, but they may be more of a link/copy paste, than new material.
My apologies in advance.
If any of you wish to send me material of your own, I would be more than happy to post it in that it would save me time and I do genuinely appreciate it when you guys send me stuff.
El Cap-i-tan
Video Games > Wife
One must ask the question;
"If men are putting video games ahead of their wives is it the video games that are getting that good, or are the wives becoming that bad?"
In the article it cites 15% of the divorce filings they analyzed mentioned "World of Warcraft" or video games in general as one of the reasons women were filing for divorce. How much do you want to bet it wasn't just Jim being uncompellingly drawn to the video games as much as it was Jim's wife nagging and whining, driving him into the arms of video games?
"If men are putting video games ahead of their wives is it the video games that are getting that good, or are the wives becoming that bad?"
In the article it cites 15% of the divorce filings they analyzed mentioned "World of Warcraft" or video games in general as one of the reasons women were filing for divorce. How much do you want to bet it wasn't just Jim being uncompellingly drawn to the video games as much as it was Jim's wife nagging and whining, driving him into the arms of video games?
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
How Affordable is Housing?
The latest from MJ Perry. Low interest rate, tanking housing prices. Ah, if only the macro-economic fundamentals of the economy were sound. Also, keep in mind markets can over-adjust.
Tuesday, June 02, 2009
"Everyone Welcome"
I was in my old neighborhood today, driving around on the motorcycle, thanking Obama for making it not worth my time to get a day time job, thusly forcing me into semi-retirement and thusly forcing me to enjoy the perfect weather. But before I got onto the West River Parkway (a scenic parkway that follows the Mississippi) I saw the Seward Coop, a local food coop, and on the building it said;
"Everyone Welcome."
And as I sat there at the light looking at the sign, it occurred to me that this sign was much more telling about leftist mentality that at first glance in that WHAT FREAKING GROCERY STORE DOESN'T WELCOME EVERYONE?
Do you know of a company that does NOT welcome everyone?
Isn't that the goal of commerce is to get EVERYONE into your store so they spend their money?
I never saw Rainbow or Cub Foods (large "evil" corporate grocerers) with signs saying, "Only Tall People Allowed."
Or Target that said, "Only Jews on Thursdays, Christians on Fridays, Aethiests of Saturdays and Muslims on Mondays."
The statement is inane. But here we can peer into the delusional psychology of the left.
Understand it isn't enough to just simply welcome everyone just like everyone else does and not make a big stink about it. No, you have to wear this badge of altruism for all to see. To show how accepting of all peoples, races and cultures that you are. Forget that "welcoming everyone" is SOP, if not the most sought after goal of marketing and every business. No, you have to be special and SHOW to the world that you "Welcome everyone."
Additionally, in bragging about how they "welcome everyone" they are implying that somehow other grocerers don't. That Rainbow and Cub and Lund's and Byerly's are all racist, sexist, homophobic, bigots. Not that this was their intention, but the logical deduction is "Well if they welcome EVERYONE, then obviously other grocers don't."
Regardless the point here is the vital leftist pscyhosis of symbolism over substance. It doesn't matter that grocers don't discriminate. It doesn't matter that there hasn't been any problems with different people being able to get service at various grocers. It all simply boils down to the people who run the coop want to feel good about themselves, but without really doing anything productive or that has actual tangible worth.
"Look, we put a sign up showing everybody that we welcome everybody!"
What exact problem did that solve?
The answer, nothing, there was never a problem to begin with.
But hey, they got warm fuzzies and they can pat themselves on the back (without having to do something tangible, like contribute to GDP).
Yes, I'm sure that will help us turn this country around.
"Everyone Welcome."
And as I sat there at the light looking at the sign, it occurred to me that this sign was much more telling about leftist mentality that at first glance in that WHAT FREAKING GROCERY STORE DOESN'T WELCOME EVERYONE?
Do you know of a company that does NOT welcome everyone?
Isn't that the goal of commerce is to get EVERYONE into your store so they spend their money?
I never saw Rainbow or Cub Foods (large "evil" corporate grocerers) with signs saying, "Only Tall People Allowed."
Or Target that said, "Only Jews on Thursdays, Christians on Fridays, Aethiests of Saturdays and Muslims on Mondays."
The statement is inane. But here we can peer into the delusional psychology of the left.
Understand it isn't enough to just simply welcome everyone just like everyone else does and not make a big stink about it. No, you have to wear this badge of altruism for all to see. To show how accepting of all peoples, races and cultures that you are. Forget that "welcoming everyone" is SOP, if not the most sought after goal of marketing and every business. No, you have to be special and SHOW to the world that you "Welcome everyone."
Additionally, in bragging about how they "welcome everyone" they are implying that somehow other grocerers don't. That Rainbow and Cub and Lund's and Byerly's are all racist, sexist, homophobic, bigots. Not that this was their intention, but the logical deduction is "Well if they welcome EVERYONE, then obviously other grocers don't."
Regardless the point here is the vital leftist pscyhosis of symbolism over substance. It doesn't matter that grocers don't discriminate. It doesn't matter that there hasn't been any problems with different people being able to get service at various grocers. It all simply boils down to the people who run the coop want to feel good about themselves, but without really doing anything productive or that has actual tangible worth.
"Look, we put a sign up showing everybody that we welcome everybody!"
What exact problem did that solve?
The answer, nothing, there was never a problem to begin with.
But hey, they got warm fuzzies and they can pat themselves on the back (without having to do something tangible, like contribute to GDP).
Yes, I'm sure that will help us turn this country around.
Jacqui Smith
Ah, and this is the "anchor of morality" that was going to decide who and who should not be able to visit the UK, specifically banning Michael Savage from the UK.
I refused to visit the UK when former Mayor Livingstone of London slammed the US. Then once he lost his re-election I thought I would visit London again.
Not until Michael Savage gets an apology will I set foot in the country or for that matter buy British goods.
I refused to visit the UK when former Mayor Livingstone of London slammed the US. Then once he lost his re-election I thought I would visit London again.
Not until Michael Savage gets an apology will I set foot in the country or for that matter buy British goods.
Monday, June 01, 2009
Best of Captain Capitalism - Jim Still Wears His Ring
My buddy John hasn't bought a new shirt in about 20 years. And the reason he hasn't bought a new shirt in 20 years is because he buys used shirts at the Disabled Vietnam Vet store.
His logic is irrefutable;
"I don't care to find a wife. I don't go out to bars or clubs. So why spend $20 on a new shirt that will just go out of style in a year when I can buy a used shirt for $1 and help out the disabled vets?"
But his logic also applies to other wares and services, especially when you don't care to go to boomchicaboom bars and just want a beer or just want a burger.
God bless the VFW and American Legion.
For if there are establishments that stand to gain from a recession, it will be the American Legion and the VFW.
I've started frequenting the VFW's and American Legion's in the area simply because of three reasons;
1. I don't "go out" anymore "trying to meet girls" and therefore have no reason to pay $9 for a martini.
2. You can not only get a martini, but a burger, fries, a soda and tip for $9 at an American Legion or VFW.
3. I'd rather give my $9 to the vets than some young preppy putz on daddy's dime who thinks they're going to make it big by setting up a bar and charging $10 for a martini in down town. Additionally the conversation and company of veterans is insanely more intellectual and less painful than trying to converse with Bambi the cosmetology major about who should be voted off Teen Idol.
And that's why I like Jim.
I met Jim at the American Legion in town. He was an older guy, WWII vet and dapperly dressed for his age. We got to talking and I noticed after five minutes of conversation that he had a wedding ring on. The problem was it didn't add up. It was approaching midnight and he was at a bar sipping away at some kind of bourbon talking to my skinny Irish ass. Where was his wife?
Unfortunately I knew the answer, but thought an old guy like him might like to talk about it.
"Where's your wife?"
He paused and with no change or inflection in his tone said, "She's dead."
"How long ago?" I asked.
"Three years." he said.
I didn't want to make a comment about him still wearing his ring. Not that I wanted him to "go out and find another girl" or that "he should get over it and move on." Quite the contrary. If I would have said anything it would have been, "Hey, I respect that you're still wearing that ring and being loyal to your wife, even after her death." But I didn't deem my political observation necessary. Based on how many drinks he had, I figured he was bidding his time and numbing the pain until he could see her again.
That being said, I'll be damned if I don't applaud him here and now. For I could never figure out, for my self anyway, if I got married and my wife were to die, how I could re-marry. Maybe I'm too idealistic. Maybe I've watched too many American movies where the good guys win and there's some semblance of justice or honor. But if I lost my wife, I don't think, let alone see how I could marry another gal. No disrespect to all you other gals out there, but that concept of marrying "the one" (not to get all chicky on you guys) means "the one."
And I tip my hat to Jim for having such a lovely wife that he could accept no substitute.
His logic is irrefutable;
"I don't care to find a wife. I don't go out to bars or clubs. So why spend $20 on a new shirt that will just go out of style in a year when I can buy a used shirt for $1 and help out the disabled vets?"
But his logic also applies to other wares and services, especially when you don't care to go to boomchicaboom bars and just want a beer or just want a burger.
God bless the VFW and American Legion.
For if there are establishments that stand to gain from a recession, it will be the American Legion and the VFW.
I've started frequenting the VFW's and American Legion's in the area simply because of three reasons;
1. I don't "go out" anymore "trying to meet girls" and therefore have no reason to pay $9 for a martini.
2. You can not only get a martini, but a burger, fries, a soda and tip for $9 at an American Legion or VFW.
3. I'd rather give my $9 to the vets than some young preppy putz on daddy's dime who thinks they're going to make it big by setting up a bar and charging $10 for a martini in down town. Additionally the conversation and company of veterans is insanely more intellectual and less painful than trying to converse with Bambi the cosmetology major about who should be voted off Teen Idol.
And that's why I like Jim.
I met Jim at the American Legion in town. He was an older guy, WWII vet and dapperly dressed for his age. We got to talking and I noticed after five minutes of conversation that he had a wedding ring on. The problem was it didn't add up. It was approaching midnight and he was at a bar sipping away at some kind of bourbon talking to my skinny Irish ass. Where was his wife?
Unfortunately I knew the answer, but thought an old guy like him might like to talk about it.
"Where's your wife?"
He paused and with no change or inflection in his tone said, "She's dead."
"How long ago?" I asked.
"Three years." he said.
I didn't want to make a comment about him still wearing his ring. Not that I wanted him to "go out and find another girl" or that "he should get over it and move on." Quite the contrary. If I would have said anything it would have been, "Hey, I respect that you're still wearing that ring and being loyal to your wife, even after her death." But I didn't deem my political observation necessary. Based on how many drinks he had, I figured he was bidding his time and numbing the pain until he could see her again.
That being said, I'll be damned if I don't applaud him here and now. For I could never figure out, for my self anyway, if I got married and my wife were to die, how I could re-marry. Maybe I'm too idealistic. Maybe I've watched too many American movies where the good guys win and there's some semblance of justice or honor. But if I lost my wife, I don't think, let alone see how I could marry another gal. No disrespect to all you other gals out there, but that concept of marrying "the one" (not to get all chicky on you guys) means "the one."
And I tip my hat to Jim for having such a lovely wife that he could accept no substitute.
Dealing with Kim Jong Il
This is pretty much how every real American male below the age of 40 that has not yet been emasculated by society and still has a little John Wayne in him views the situation with North Korea and the utter spinelessness of not just the UN, but the US, Japan, Russia, China and in general our current day leaders.
If you haven't bought your LICD comic book, then I suggest you get on it.
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