Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Fools

I don't know, maybe make your own kid become a freaking adult and pay for their own college education?

And how many people are cashing in retirement plans to pay for worthless degrees.

Good lord, I'm going to smoke and drink tonight. You guys have fun with this society. I'm checking out and living in Black Water via Red Dead Redemption.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Heh Heh

Enjoy the decline!

Now what if America didn't have corporate taxes?

I know, I know. That's just CRAZY TALK!

Sunday, August 29, 2010

To the 30/40 Something Woman Who Wouldn't Leave Me Alone

I heard you the first time.

It was obvious you didn't pick up on my somewhat less than subtle hint.

And therefore I had to endure your frequent commentary, obviously directed my way, which interrupted my dinner.

So let me explain to you why you are 30/40 something and sitting at a bar by yourself and I am 35 sitting at a bar by myself but why I am infinitely more happy.

I came there because I was hungry. I needed food. And since I am an alpha-male bachelor of the highest order (not to mention an outstanding economist) I have outsourced all of my food preparation to third parties, namely restaurants.

The reason I chose this particular restaurant was not because you were there, nor the score of other desperate 30 something women, but because it served four simple purposes;

1. It was open
2. It had good food
3. It also served Rumpleminze
4. It was nearby

These four simple things AND ONLY these four simple things is what made me show up.

I wanted food.

I wanted a drink.

I didn't want to prepare it.

And I wanted to go home.

However, you were there for different reasons.

And it was plainly obvious.

First off, I wore crappy khaki shorts, sandals, a crappy shirt and a cap. It was obvious I did not come there to meet anybody.

You however, still thinking it's 19-freaking-93 and you're still 21 were dolled up in a silver sequene top and black slick slacks. You were on the hunt, purposely looking to find a guy, whereas I was not looking for a girl.

(Oh, and by the way, please don't act indignant that I presupposed you were looking for a man. I'm not a naive, simple, honest 22 year old kid anymore. The truth with that clothing, you were on the hunt.)

However, much like 20 years ago when young men (who you would not doubt today give an appendage for) gave you unwelcomed advances and you poo pooed them away, your unwelcomed advances I had to endure today were incredibly hypocritical. The reason being is that those "unwelcomed" advances you had to "suffer" 20 years ago were no doubt at a bar where you were dressed the part and enticing such advances and no doubt welcoming them whilst acting appalled they occurred not to mention picking up free drinks all along the way.

Today, I was sitting by myself, warfing down food, in crappy clothes giving no such false signals to beget attention or free drinks. I wanted to be left alone, eat my food, yet you continued to harass me.

Second, I ordered a Rumpleminze.

Why?

Because I like Rumpleminze. Strong, ice cold, soothing on the throat. You can enjoy it for a while. Nice patient, enjoyable drink.

You, at the age of 40 something ordered a vodka-freaking-red bull.

Really? Is that what the "kids" are ordering today? Is that what's "hip?" Are you in with the "in crowd?" Perhaps you can find yourself a Vampire/Wolverine Boyfriend or whatever the fad is with the mentally insane teenagers of today.

Third, speaking of kids. How many do you have? Because I see that "single moms" are all the rage. See, I have no kids because instead of thinking of myself the entire time I remembered what it was like to be a kid. And I then came to the incredibly OBVIOUS conclusion that before bringing a kid into this world, maybe I ought to find a reliable, stable, loving wife before I start breeding and bringing innocent souls into this world. That they weren't "toys" or "objects" to have. That they were humans, just like you and me and had feelings, needs, requirements and demands. But I guess I'm just supposed to ignore my natural and visceral disgust for single parenthood in that obviously both parents failed to get it right the first time and I should instead go the politically correct route and cheer on the "nobility" and "courage" of "single parents."

Un-freaking-likely. There's still a victim. It's the children, and unlike when you guys invoke the term "for the children" to advance your own personal aims while cowardly hiding behind the child, I actually mean it in that I actually care about the kid, mine or not. I'm going back to enjoy my Rumpleminze while I avoid divorce if it's all the same with you.

Fourth, physically you got to be kidding me. I run 4-7 miles every other day and lift weights. I watch what I eat and I am in great shape. You look like you watch Oprah 4-7 times a day and occasionally lift your ass from the couch to get more food. I don't care what a bunch of bitter, burnt out 1960's hippie aging feminists said in the drug induced 70's and neither should you. The truth is that no matter what philosophy they lay down and tell you how things "should" be the REALITY is that men like women that are in shape.

I know.

We're evil, sexist, bigoted misogynist poopy-heads.

All of us.

But it ain't going to change and the sooner you learn that, the sooner you ACCEPT that FACT, the sooner you will start to employ strategies and techniques that are actually based in REALITY and have success.

Now, no doubt many of the female readers of this are livid.

No doubt I am evil and a horrible man for daring to lecture this slightly-aged woman about her unwelcomed behavior not to mention point out truths we all know to be true.

But for just once will you girls listen to me? Especially those of you who continue to watch dumbass movies like "Eat Pray Love" thinking somehow it relates to you and will somehow help you. Because if you listen, you will actually get some practical advice that will bring you genuine progress and happiness in your life unlike the tombs of women's magazine articles you've read which has resulted in you ended up where you are today (which is where the annoying woman was this particular night)

You are in your 30's or 40's.

You are not in your 20's.

And whereas men may have been naive and willing to fall over each other just to get a date with you when Clinton was in his first term, that is no longer the case. The game has changed.

Namely it has changed in that the men are no longer playing. They left the field. I don't know how many times I've heard late 30 something female friends of mine say, "You have to play hard to get. You have to get him to chase you."

I ask in return;

"Have you ever looked back to see that NOBODY is chasing?"

This somehow turns out to be some kind of "revolutionary" (not to mention" insulting")thought.

"WHAT!???"

"MEN, NOT CHASING!!!????"

"HOW DARE YOU!!!!"

No, how dare you.

What, you thought men were going to chase forever?

You see, men only have a finite, limited amount of energy for chasing. And you girls in your 20's were masters of exhausting it all.

Giving out your phone number, but then never returning the call.

Agreeing to a date and then canceling at the last minute.

The made up drama and land mines you laid around to keep them on their feet and never sure of where they stood.

And good lord, don't even get me started on all the complications involved with having sex.

It all worked GREAT back in the late teens and 20's, but guess what happened?

Inevitably men got smart. Men got wise. And worst of all, men just plain got some self-respect.

It wasn't an immediate flood on account different men woke up at various ages, but you throw in some divorces, the general disrespect and disregard for men and male behavior in society, and guess what?

20 years later men aren't chasing any more. They left in droves. They flooded OUT of the market.

Don't take it personally, it's not that they don't want to chase "you" any more.

They just don't want to chase period.

The "field" or the "market" has become so hostile, so hopelessly lopsided men increasingly went against their largest biological drive (women) and started enjoying life on their own. And think about that. It's become so hostile, so futile and such a waste of resources MEN HAVE LITERALLY STOPPED CHASING WOMEN.

You think I'm joking?

Why is the average age of marriage jumping?

Why are people having less kids?

And might I ask, do you know any perpetual bachelors out there who just enjoy a good Rumpleminze, some video games, or perhaps some fishing instead of trying to even entertain the idea of suffering a first date?

Do you know any 30-4o something men who regularly "go out clubbing" and "partaaaaay?"

Yeah, those ranks are thinning a bit aren't they? It's not that ALL men are quitting, just the good ones in that they have enough smarts, self-respect and sense to.

Worse still, and please don't shoot the messenger, this is just the plain truth-

Men can and usually date younger. So all those nice college boys that tried to pine for your affection back in the 90's you never called back or dared to mock infront of your girlfriends? Yeah, they're not gunning after you any more (if gunning after anybody at all). You need to chase after some Reaganauts who remember Duran Duran. Enjoy the Rogaine!

The overall point can actually be summarized with a classical supply and demand chart of economics. The "supply" women were willing to supply to the market was somewhat limited and Maureen-Dowdishly stingy (thus a supply curve that is far to the left). And in 1993 young Gen X men, quite obliviously were all desperately trying to get any kind of attention and affection they could (thus a demand curve to the far right). This resulted in an insanely high price the men had to "pay" to get a date (denoted by "P1"). This "price" manifested itself in terms of expensive dates, kindness, willing to show up, asking girls out more, general attention towards women, not to mention suffering being stood up, psychotic episodes, drama, soap opera BS and just general abuse they would endure. Over time though the sheer hell a man had to go through dating deterred him from the market (not to mention, a lot of men found lovely, kind caring women and immeidately grabbed them for themselves and left the dating market forever). This shifted the demand curve to the far left over the course of 15 years. What's interesting, given the "EAt PRay Love" and "Why You Rule and Your Boyfriend Sucks" magazines and the "cougar" fad and feminist indoctination and lord knows whatever other faux-fads the media barraged poor young women with, women were led to believe that they would always be in demand. That they owned the market. That they owned the hottest piece of property in 2006 and that there was no housing bubble. Ergo, almost unbeknownst to most 30-40 something women they never picked up on this dramatic drop in demand and held their supply incredibly low not knowing most of the buyers had left the market for substitute goods (look it up if you're interested in economics). This shift in the demand curve resulted in a huge drop in price from P1 to P2.


Now the question is (assuming you would inevitably like to get married or start a family or just plain have a guy in your life) how do you deal with this dire "market."

Well, the sad truth is it may be out of your control.

Notice the only thing that changed is demand. Men (the "buyers") left the market, not the women. Additionally it took about 15 years to drive them away, it's certainly going to take longer to get them back. They're more focused on deriving the most utility from the remaining years of their lives. They're not 25 thinking of starting a family, they're 40 and thinking about an LCD projector and Red Dead Redemption and football season and how to make up the lost income they're never going to receive from social security. Therefore you can hit the clubs all you want, but if no men are there, no men are there.

This means about the only course of action you have is to ask men out.

I remember an old female college friend of mine who had a HUGE crush on this guy. She spent an ENTIRE YEAR fretting and worrying about asking him out and tried every trick in the book to get him to ask her out. Hilariously in true male form, he never picked up the hints which compelled her to ask him out.

Did she?

Never did. She CRIED MULTIPLE TIMES PER WEEK instead of just getting it over with and asking him out. Suffered infinitely more and longer than if she had just bleeping asking the guy out.

Sorry ladies, it's the 4th quarter, you're down by 14 points and you do not have the luxury of waiting for the guy to ask you out.

When myself and my other male colleagues were told women were equal back in the 90's we actually took it to heart. We believed it and incorporated into our thought process that women are equal. And guess what, whether you like it or not, today you ARE equal which means you now have equal responsibility, not least of which in our minds back then was asking us out or making your intentions known.

Today it's not even an academic debate. It's reality. Men aren't looking, they're not asking, they're out of the market. Your only option is to take matters into your own hands and pull the trigger yourself.

Sadly, or perhaps not so sadly, the only other option is to give up like most men. I will readily admit it's not just the women that have made the courting world a nightmare (though I will defend till my death they have disproportionately done so). There are members in the males ranks that are entitled to their fair share of blame. And given this you may realize what a lot of men have already and that is life is too short to waste it on a pursuit that will never materialize. You have 82 years of life expectancy. And while you may not like playing video games or fishing, there are certainly other things you can be doing aside from "clubbing" or "looking for a guy" or just plain wasting your finite energy looking/hoping for one.

You may biologically or naturally be against this. You may say, "but I want to find a man and get married and have kids."

Well again, it's an issue of reality. Reality may be that's never going to happen. So do you want to continue wasting life pursuing something that is not going to happen? Or do you want to enjoy it doing things that are within your control, never worrying about men again?

It sounds sad and depressing at first, but when you realize the reality or at least probability of the situation you can move on and enjoy a really good life without men. Millions of men have done the exact same thing, just without women. And the freedom that comes with it to enjoy your life and do your own thing with no regard or attachment to the idea of courtship is actually quite liberating and genuine happiness can be found in such a life.

Besides which, there was only one small difference between myself and the desperate 30 something woman at the bar that explained why I was happy and she was miserable-

She's still looking.

I gave up long ago.

Who do you think has the happier life?

President Erkle


Good lord.

Look, I'm not for the faux photo ops that Sarkozy and Putin deliberately put on to entice the weaker minded females of the population into voting for them, but could we at least has some freaking dignity in the office of the President?

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Dividends

As some of you know, I teach a BRILLIANT online course on stock valuation and analysis. I say it's brilliant not to brag, but because it really is brilliant, there's nothing like it in college. It covers not just how to read financial statements and how to calculate ratios, but picks up where colleges fail and TEACHES YOU VALUATION TECHNIQUES. YOU SHOULD TAKE IT.

In any case, I had a student ask a question about dividends, the answer to which I realized would be of benefit to all the Cappy Capites out there, not to mention the everyday Joe's who are having a hard time understanding why their 401k isn't skyrocketing through the roof during these glory days of hope and change.

So I submit to you more of my economic genius;

Yes, everything you stated is correct. To clarify though what drives the value of a stock or what it is you are precisely selling to another buyer on the second market, let me further explain.

What you own when you own a share of stock is the right to the proportional earnings of that corporation. Now, of course not all companies pay out their earnings in the form of a dividend. They will retain ALL of the earnings and reinvest them back into the company.

Now you would say, "well then why should I own the stock if they NEVER pay a dividend."

And you would be correct. If a company NEVER pays a dividend, then that stock has no value. You just gave the company (or secondary market seller) money for a piece of paper that will never give you money in return.

However, companies inevitably DO pay dividends. The reason they retain earnings and not pay dividends is to grow the company so they can earn even MORE money in the future.

Now this is where investing philosophy gets cute. Companies are typically very arrogant about paying dividends. They ALL think they're going to grow into huge multi-billion dollar behemoths and then, MAYBE THEN they'll pay you serfs some pittance of a dividend. Of course what is more likely to happen is they inevitably go belly up. What they SHOULD do is when times are good is pay out some of their earnings as a dividend otherwise the stock IS worthless.

Now what's interesting (and scary) about this, is it shows you a MAJOR flaw in today's conventional retirement system - everybody buys stocks because they "might go up in the future," not because they pay dividends. Well the question is "what drives stock prices up?" And the answer is scary;

Only dividends can drive stock prices up.

The reason why is when you sell a share of stock, yes you may have made a gain, but why did that buyer buy it from you? Well, because today or in the future that stock will pay dividends.

No matter how many times a stock is bought or sold, it only has value because either today or sometime in the future it's going to pay a dividend. So you are essenitally selling the right to future dividends when you sell a stock. Ergo, dividends (or the likelyhood dividends will be paid) is what drives stock prices.

So what this means is you currently have 100 million Americans all throwing their money into 401k's and IRA's and 403b's NOT because all these companies are paying great dividends, but because they magically think "stock prices just go up" for random magical reasons.

This is why you will want to DEFINITELY look at the "dividend yield" of a mutual fund or a stock before you buy it to make sure there is real cash flow associated with the stock and giving that stock something of value.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Why Liberal Art Majors Should Be Banned from Politics

As we now come around to finishing off the second year of Obama's and the democrat's rule over the US and the economy that never really recovered looks like it's going to tank again, a prediction I made quite some time ago is coming true;

People who 2 years ago could not be reasoned with, with data, statistics, and facts about the perils and dangers of socialism are slowly being convinced by their;

1. Personal current dire economic condition
2. Hopelessness about their personal future economic condition
3. Lack of financial and employment security

I knew, after arguing with enough leftists and liberals, that there was no changing their mind in that they were married to an ideology and did not have the intellectual fortitude and honesty to entertain facts. And the only thing that would convince them is the reality they wrought upon themselves.

Now while most of my colleagues on the left will continue to beat the worn out drum that this is all still "Bush's fault," I know that some of you are contemplating removing your lips from Barack Obama's buttocks, and will perhaps now listen to rational, realistic, fact-based adult reasoning.

I know I have no hopes of throwing up the terrabytes of economic data and keeping your attention. But perhaps you will entertain a theory I have about liberal art majors and politics.

There is a STRONG correlation, so strong it goes beyond a theory. It's a law. And I even put together a nice little presentation on it. I also am intellectually honest in this presentation and point out fallacies on the right. Perhaps this can be the starting ground by which we set aside all the brainwashing, pot-smoking, flowers and puppies and unicorn talk we received in college and now start to be adults and be intellectually honest in what we observe with our own eyes. I'm not expecting everybody to become Reaganauts, but a simple acknowledgment of the phenomenon I've observed here;



And if we agree upon this, then maybe I could entertain you with some data and statistics?

Forget College

Why go to college when you will;

1. Waste your money on a bubble degree
2. Spend 4-5 years of your youth with no improved prospects of employment
3. Can go to a two year college and learn a practical skill that will generate more income than a 4 year degree?

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Where Not to...

1. move
2. invest
3. Start a family
4.work hard
5. start a business


And may I point out that while the democrats here in Minnesota rail against our Governor, Tim Pawlenty, for being a cold hearted evil republican for not increasing taxes, Minnesota is now finally off of this list?

Enjoy the decline!

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

The Destructive Principle

One of my more brilliant observations or creations is what I like to call "The Destructive Principle."

In short it is the theory or law that it is easier to destroy something that already exists than to create something of value that is new.

You say, "well, what's so big about that?"

Well, it delves deep, deep, deep into the leftist crusader mindset and is vital to understand.

Understand ALL human beings have a desire to achieve something. Some people want to go to the moon. Others want to start a family. Some want to start a business. However, it is a question of whether you have the work ethic and tenacity to set goals, study hard, prepare and set out to achieve those goals. But for many people on the left they do not have the work ethic to go forth and produce something of value. Instead, they find it much easier to protest against something thereby avoiding having to produce anything of worth yet still feeling good about themselves as they "crusade" against some perceived evil or ailment of society.

What is key to understand though about The Destructive Principle is that these people, if intellectually dishonest enough, do not care whether what they set out to destroy or crusade against is indeed an ailment or something bad. Matter of fact, some professional protesters and crusaders will go out of their way to besmirch and vilify something that is largely innocent and productive for society simply so they can avoid a real job, yet get to play "make believe super hero crusader."

The video below is again a mere sampling of my economic genius. Please note the worthlessness of the people's degrees I highlight in the video and ask yourself the question;

"Do they care about society or do they just really care about themselves to the point they hold no reservations of making it worse for society so they can play "super crusader make believe adult hero."

Enjoying the Decline

I'm being serious when I say this. I REALLY enjoy watching the decline and chaos. I suggest pouring a martini and lighting up a cigar and watching this like a movie;


When I Am King

I will eliminate any CAFE standards and bring back 8-12 cylinder cars and let the auto companies make whatever cars they want, bringing back a car renaissance similar to the 1950's.

GM however will be forced to abide by this.

Monday, August 23, 2010

But NO! THat's TOO SIMPLE!

He's not only written about it before, I've written about it before.

But it is just too damn simple for the average "brainwashed-to-hate-corporations-yet-demand-jobs-and-high-401k plan balances Americans" to understand and appreciate.

Chicks Shooting AR 15's

For all the Natasha and Sindi fans;



Now they may upgrade to "Hot Chicks in Bikini's Shooting AR 15's while in heels" but that would require contributions to finance the ammo and heels.

Escape from Minneapolis

I have never been so happy I sold my property and no longer pay property taxes in Minneapolis.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

-140% Return on Sales at Americana Community Bank

Normally, it's bad when you lose money.

But when you have sales of roughly $3.8 million and you have a loss of $5.2 MILLION, you are so spectacularly mismanaged that it's more evidence of a criminal organization or scam than any kind of incompetence.

That is of course unless you're Americana Community Bank.

To continue my gloating (and to remind Cappy Cap readers), this was the bank that 3 years ago said while I was being interviewed;

1. "We don't have any problems in our real estate portfolio."

and

2. Hired my ex boss instead of me for the position.

and

3. Received a cease and desist order last year.

Here's their financials if you're interested
. Good God and Gravy. What's sad is it really isn't a criminal enterprise or some kind of scam. They just are really that incompetent.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Tatsuya Ishida's Love Fest is Over at Sinfest

Sinfest, which if you haven't read, is arguably the greatest comic ever since Calvin and Hobbes.

It's creator, Tatsuya Ishida, however is a huge Obama fan. This would normally put me at odds with the guy, but if you read his comic from the beginning, you will realize he is simply a misled genius.

What is heartening though is to see a noticeable lack of Obama cartoons wherein Ishida's lips are firmly planted on Obama's buttocks. Seems the glue is coming loose at the young man's (heck, he's a year younger than me) lips and a dose of economic reality is setting in.

The larger point is much like liberal arts-majoring melinnials today who face no employment prospects, I enjoy watching the Obama fanatics slowly get hit upside the head with reality.

Enjoy the decline!

Never Trust a Woman Who Doesn't Like Victor Borge

In my youth I had purchased tickets to see Victor Borge 6 months in advance to make sure I got the best seats in the house.

I have regaled many of you with the story before wherein I could not find a date because most women in my generation at that time were too uncultured to appreciate, let alone even know who he was.

However, it did remind me of an instance long ago in Cappy Cap history where I had courted a young lady who after showing her my Victor Borge DVD was not impressed and did not laugh even once during the entire show.

The relationship ended shortly thereafter.

So a lesson to all the younger Cappy Capites out there, if you want to save yourself some time to determine whether the girl is worth dating, simply start by showing her a Victor Borge DVD. The Great Dane left us at least that much.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

More Econ Genius

Crusader Turned Politician Turned Banker

It's a lengthy read, but you will see my "crusaderism" theory explaining it all. Page 4 you finally learn he's (guess what!) a banker at Wells Fargo!

But again, don't listen to me. I'm not a team player.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Why the Stimulus Failed

This is going to be short and sweet on account, I'm semi-drunk and I'm on vacation.

When one looks at stocks as a potential investment they face a paradox -

The only means by which to analyze the stock as an investment is the past. History. The financial statements and balance sheets in the past. It is the only source of real data we have in that in order for data to exist, it must have already occurred.

HOWEVER, it is the FUTURE that actually determines it's current day value (or rather, people's perception of the future that drives the stock price today). Therefore as the market is pelted with various data about the state of the economy and earnings releases of the company, the stock price moves second to second as data triggers trades and pushes the price up or down.

Now, this is nothing new to finance professionals and basically people who have their heads out of their asses when it comes to the basic functions of the market. HOwever, this simple aspect of how a liquid market functions is completely LOST on Obama and his Ivy League losers who now head up fiscal policy. For right now they are running scared this pathetic, loser Keynesian stimulus is failing and have no way to explain it's utter catastrophic failure.

So let a humble Big Ten-er who actually paid his way through college lesson you Ivy League, spoiled brat trust fund baby schmucks in how the real world works.

The country is no different than a share of stock, a piece of property or any other type of asset.

IT'S VALUE IS DERIVED FROM THE FUTURE CASH FLOWS IT WILL GENERATE OVER IT'S LIFE TIME (not to mention the people's expectations of that future).

Now while you morons have your heads so far up Keynes' corpse's ass, you fail to realize that you can spend all Keynesian stimulus money up front now in the hope it triggers some magical Disney Obama Unicorn recovery, but if you spend so much that you sacrifice the future by basically bankrupting or calling into question the entire solvency of the nation you undermine and destroy those future cash flows that are to presumably deliver value to assets today.

Ergo, while you indebt future generations to the tune of 110% GDP, that's all good and dandy you spent the proceeds for the debt issuance on repaving roads that didn't need repaving, but you scared people from buying any kind of consumer or luxury good because they fear they're going to have to pay back that debt.

Ergo, while in your infinite Ivy League school wisdom, you've essentially made 50% tax rates a guarantee due to promises in nationalized health care, social security, medicare and other impossible-to-pay-for entitlement programs that you've scared people away from investing in anything but gold.

And of course, ergo, since you're too cowardly to cut government spending, limit government employee union pensions and in general live within your means, you've all but destroyed anybody's true hope and faith in a private sector future, which, OOPS, happens to not only drive the real economy by which the government relies upon through taxing, but also drives;

stock prices
asset prices
mutual fund prices
401k balances
IRA balances
403b balances
pension balances

oh!

And guess what!

investment
job creation
and general FREAKING economic growth

It is this simple destruction of a future, the simple elimination of any REAL hope the working population of this country had that explains why your Keynesian stimulus is impotent just like the degenerate academian losers such as Krugman and Romer. You Keynesians are simply destroying the future by bankrupting it to pay for magic-mumbo-jumbo farcical economic magic today that will never work.

It only behooves the question whether you freaking Ivy League schmoes were really that stupid or were sinister enough the entire time to know what you were doing purposely tanking the economy.

I fear it is a combination of both that only such incompetent morons as you could pull it off despite the seemingly mutually exclusive nature of the two options.

The People Who Really Threaten America

Just watch the whole thing about Corporate "Responsibility" International;


Saturday, August 14, 2010

You Think So????

Honest to God.

3 years after a recession and they NOW finally start asking these questions.

Had the Captain been in charge 300 million Americans wouldn't be suffering a recession for 3 bleepin' years.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Cart Before the Horse



There is so many things to point out here, I don't know where to begin.

1. Why youth should not have the right to vote until they're 30.
2. Moron in the picture does not realize how reality is making her look like the fool she is.
3. The entitlement mentality of youth
4. Who's your president?
5. Utter lack of understanding of how the real world works
6. Behooving the question, who trained this idiot?
7. Behooving another question, how many more idiotic youth think this way

I could go on, but I promised myself I wouldn't get riled up during vacation.

You Mean It's NOT Bush's Fault

Nor Obama's
Nor Greenspan's
Nor any government official's fault.

It's the American people to blame.

This is what happens when you abandon personal responsibility.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

You Mean We Need Economic Growth?

As the Ivy League Wall Street gurus try to rationalize ever higher stock prices by looking at only the companies and industries themselves, while completely ignoring the economic environment they sit in, it slowly dawns on some of them that the Keynesian stimulus has failed and no matter what the Fed or Feds do, unless it's lowering taxes and spurring genuine economic growth, nothing will rationalize higher stock prices.

I'm off to Lusk, WY, because...well...it's there.

Enjoy

the

decline.

Monday, August 09, 2010

More Fairburns




Found a good piece today. Pictures again are poor. You will only have to suffer 2 more weeks of this before I return to minneapolis wherein I'll have no agates to hunt, no mountains to climb and will resort to writing about the dire economic state of this country once again.

Children Now Officially Priced Out of the Market

I have decided (and when I decide things, they have a tendency to become economically true, not by the fact I've "decreed" them, but that I've already realized the economic reality of the situation and merely point it out) that children are now officially priced out of the market. Much like labor unions priced US cars out of existence (only to be bailed out), laws, government and just sociological factors have made it too risky a proposition to have children.

I've gone into detail before why I don't have children, but I shall summarize it shortly;

1. Financial costs. Sorry, $250,000 on the low end of estimates is just too much money.
2. Legal risks. I have a kid, I now I have a liability in a litigious society. Doesn't matter if the kid is good or not, if he bumps into somebody's car, hits a cat, or just decides to claim his father "emotionally abused him," forget it. I'm not going to jail or forking out the money.
3. Emotional. Guarantee you'll love that little varmint when you have him/her. It will hurt only that much more when there's a 50% chance s/he will be taken away in a divorce initiated by your spouse who said something or other about "till death do us part" a couple years ago. Ergo, they aren't just a legal and financial liability, they're an emotional liability.
4. Ease of life. The people next to my hotel room have 4 kids. Good lord am I thankful I just have an X-Box as my sole dependent.
5. Government interference makes it impossible to bring up a child effectively, namely by making traditional fatherly means of punishment (spanking and a good Bill Cosby beating) illegal. This guarantees the child will never grow up to be an adult and will have problems well past the teen years.

Regardless, this article prompted the revisitation of the children issue.

Sunday, August 08, 2010

Hey, Do You Remember This?

Heh heh.

Anybody going to point this out in the main stream propogandia?

Didn't think so.

The Captian Might Have Had a Couple

The Captain had Cindi visit him (which if you schmoes would look to your right in the side bar is Cindi advertising his book AHEM AHEM, COUGH COUGH COUGH!) and he took her to Sturgis.

Cindi is a public school teacher and her and I have our expected "disagreements" about whether the little kiddies are best served by the teachers union (despite, may I point out the irony, that I'm actually going to bat for the little runts and she is more or less occasionally regurgitating the same spew the NEA tells her to spew).

Regardless, Cindi is a VERY pretty lady and all you schmoes of the male affiliation should go and buy my book because she endorsing it, otherwise she might get a complex about herself.

But on a serious note, no, Cindi is really going to bat for us and she actually genuinely cares about her students and does her damndest to make sure those little varmints learn the three R's.

I just wish I had a 5th grade teacher like here when I was in the 5th grade.




On a side note, the Captain got his first tatoo. It's Kowalski. The penguin from the Penguins of Madagascar. I think it won't be a permanent tattoo on account I got it at the local Little Ceasar's gumball machine.



This is me drunk in Sturgis....because...well...is there any other way to be?

Friday, August 06, 2010

Thursday, August 05, 2010

The Captain's Adventures Continue!

With the climbing of Elk Peak, Silver Peak not to mention I TOTALLY HIT THE JACKPOT WITH FAIRBURN AGATES!

Now for those of you who just pat the ole Captain on the head when he mentions his agate hunting, laughing half feeling sorry for him;

"Ho ho ho. Oh, the ole Captain. Him and his agates. It's like he just replaced playing Dungeons and Dragons for a newer and nerdier passion."

I'll have you know that these things are HUGE (note the half dollar). These (I'm guessing) are worth about $400 a piece, if not more.

I apologize for the cloudy pictures, but hopefully you can see the patterns there.










Coincidence?

Could it be the five things they list here;

Children
Housing
Education
Cars
Retirement

are coincidentally the five major bubbles in the US right now?

Time to bachelor up gentlemen.

Tuesday, August 03, 2010

The Captain's Great Tornado Adventure

Getting back to my point that parents forget what it's like to be a kid and therefore forget what is "real fun," what can be funner than after a day of shooting AR 15's, smoking cigars and agate hunting in the middle of nowhere South Dakota than getting caught in the middle of the grasslands with NO COVER and racing back to the car only to decide at the last moment to go tornado chasing...because...well, one decides to form immediately off to your left.



I do believe after revisiting the physical site my tornado struck earlier this afternoon it was a "gustnado" and not a tornado I saw, but it was a text book example of a tornadic storm. HEre's the weather report.

Regardless, the larger point is that kids should be allowed to have this kind of fun. Oh sure, "parents" would raise some concerns about "safety" and blah blah blah, but it's these kind of things that one remembers later on in life and in the words of John Candy from "Planes, Trains and Automobiles"

"As much fun as I've had on this little journey, I'm sure one day I'll look back on it and laugh."

Now There Couldn't Be a REASON He Was Turned Down Now, Could There Be?

I want to ask all the touchy, feely, lefties that no doubt frequent this shop;

Did you get a look at his tax returns or schedule C?

Because if you didn't (or in the more likely case you're asking yourself "What's a schedule C?"), you're looking at a company that won't be around come 2-3 years from now.

If It Was President Bush?

Remember in 2001-2002 how the media just BLASTED Bush every chance they could because the recovery was NOT FAST ENOUGH? The hypocrisy of the main stream propogandia is just unreal.

Internships

I had a reader send me this and while this young lady and myself would probably loathe one another on most other political issues, in intellectual honesty, I do have to side with her on account that after interning myself THREE TIMES during college, none of them were anything but data entry and filing.




Additionally, since I have a readership that is compiled of younger readers and occasionally I am asked about education, college, "what major to major in," etc., permit me to save you youth some time regarding internships.

Internships depend on the field you're in. Accounting, engineering, sciences, STEM, vocational trades, etc., where even just a year or two of education can result in a skill or a trade that is valuable to an employer is worth it. You'll probably get paid AND (more importantly) get experience.

However, when it comes to the social sciences ESPECIALLY LAW AND "BUSINESS" prepare to just simply waste your time. You will do data entry, reconcile databases, and other stuff people don't care to do while euphemistically being called an "internship." Finance and investing in particular will just make you cold call, fax and be a glorified secretary.

This becomes a problem if (like when I was in college) you have to work for a living and pay for college, rent, living expenses yourself. You simply can't afford to intern if you lose the income at your day (or I guess, "night" job). Ergo, the Ole Captain's advice is this;

Intern only during summer and take on multiple interns. Treat them like dates. At the first sign of trouble ("Oh, there's been a change of plans. We're not ready to start your internship, can you scan in these files for us in the meantime?") you bail on the internship. You won't be learning anything you couldn't have done when you were in the 6th grade. Besides which you have other part time internships scheduled. As more and more internships turn out to be indentured servitude, just leave. Don't even give them a notice or finish the day. Leave.

Hopefully you will find an internship that DOES pay AND gives you experience. HOwever, keep in mind you still have to put food on the table and for the most part (no matter how unfair this is) in the real world employers abuse interns. You simply don't have to tolerate the abuse.

Monday, August 02, 2010

Explaining Hollywood Elites

You will watch.
You will conform.
You will obey.

Sunday, August 01, 2010

Somebody Inform Soucheray

I own a car very similar to this one. I get about 16 MPG.

I also strongly advise parking in "Reserved for Expecting Mothers" parking spots if you have a female in the car with you. Just claim she's pregnant. Natasha gets a kick out of it.

Passage of the CLEAR Act

The Clear Act if you want to look at it, elicited this response from the American Petroleum Institute;

“The House bill passed today will kill jobs, threaten our fragile economic recovery and place our energy security at risk. This is an anti-jobs, anti-consumer and anti-energy bill. Instead of addressing the risks of offshore development by improving safety and establishing a robust system for covering the costs of possible future accidents, this bill effectively bans development and sends thousands of workers in offshore communities to the unemployment lines.

“The unlimited liability provisions will drive the vast majority of American companies out of U.S. waters because they will not be able to obtain insurance coverage. Those remaining will be subject to huge cost hikes, reducing energy production, economic growth, American jobs and government revenues.

“While the House recognized that the deepwater moratorium is a jobs killer, we need real action and call on the administration to lift the moratorium to allow our people to get back to work. The inability to develop in the deepwater of the Gulf of Mexico, whether through an explicit moratorium or through policies that create a de-facto moratorium, will cost more than 175,000 jobs a year, the majority of them in already hard-hit Gulf Coast communities.

“Americans want and deserve improvements in offshore safety and this can be accomplished without putting thousands of people out of work and increasing the nation’s reliance on foreign sources of energy.”


Since I'm on vacation, I will leave it to you guys to draw the conclusions on capital flight.

Save the Rationalization Hamster!

Brilliant recession medicine.

Brilliant!

From the colonel.