Financial and Prepping Advice During Coronachan - With Rich Cooper

Was on Rich Cooper's show yesterday and we chit chatted and took calls about what financial and prepping moves you can make during the outbreak.  Times may be bad, but there are TREMENDOUS opportunities that will not present themselves again for decades to come.  Tune in and share with loved ones.

Do Not Save the Corona-Hoes

How Men Can Own Reproductive Control

And coincidentally, eliminate the number one cause of poverty in the world.

But, that would require agency, responsibility, and about $2,000.

Two Episodes of The Clarey Podcast!

With The Great and Merciful Coronachan keeping us all at home Cappy did two podcasts to keep you all entertained.

Episode #320 The "Quarantined" Episode
Episode #321 The "Teachers Aren't Shit" Episode

Sound cloud is also being extra cunty with requiring people to login into Facebook to get the MP3's.  I'll need to use my old MS Explorer browser to get those files because Big Tech fucking sucks.  In the meantime, just stream them on Soundcloud.

With Finals Coming Up Pay Somebody to Write Your Papers For You

Once again, Alex and his company - Academic Composition - are always more than happy to offer their paper-writing services to students who simply don't want to write bullshit papers for bullshit classes.  Alex is also always hiring writers and marketers, jobs you can do from home.  He's penned this advertisement for an prospective clients or employees, so please reach out to him if you have an interest in either:

Hello everyone, 

Many of you may have already heard of us. Academic Composition has been sponsoring Captain Capitalism for over five years and we've gained a great deal from our collaboration.

Many of Aaron's readers market for us on a regular basis and this has been a mutually beneficial arrangement for all involved.

Once again, we are in the hunt for more marketers. 

The deal is simple, you post the ads and wait for the replies. Once people respond, you will be paid $5 for each lead. Most marketers get at least five leads per week and it only takes just a few minutes of work each week. Effectively, you will be earning more than a dollar per minute.

To get started, please follow these simple steps.

1. Please create a new gmail address

 

2. Activate the forwarding feature to make sure all incoming emails come to Aleksey.Bashtavenko@gmail.com. Please follow this basic tutorial to get started and let me know if you have any questions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KrhMX_7ZM3E

 

3. Use your new gmail address to create a Craigslist account

Once you complete these steps, please email us at academiccomposition@gmail.com and we'll walk you through the rest of the process.

Aleksey Bashtavenko
Academic Composition

Owner & Principal Writer
(540) 300-1253

academiccomposition@gmail.com

www.academiccomposition.com

www.linkedin.com/pub/aleksey-bashtavenko/25/7b8/323/

How We Can Use Coronavirus to Bail Out Student Loans and Pay Down the National Debt

You can send your "thank you Cappy for saving the US economy" letters to Asshole Consulting.

Older Brother Younger Brother III

Jack Napier invited me on his show where we shot the shit a bit to escape the doldrums of the Coronachan quasi quarantine.  Nothing much exciting, but two guys shooting the shit and talk about "goat yoga."  Check it out as your evening constitutional.

Replace Teachers with YouTube

Mean, Offensive, Dark, and Hurtful Humor

Ho ho ho.

This humor sponsored by "How Not to Become a Millennial."

Coronachan Exposing Neglectful Parents

There is also a "Coronachan Prayer" at the end of the video:

A College Degree Will be No More Valuable than a High School Diploma

Interesting research showing some high school graduates are doing better than college graduates. 

Probably this thing called "work experience" you get when you don't piss away your life learning Marxism and "diversity studies."

Why "Oh The Places You'll Go" Is a Shitty High School Graduation Gift

What Gives Humans Value?

This is an excerpt from "How Not to Become a Millennial." It's arguably the most important segment in the book as it applies to every one and speaks directly to the only point and purpose you have on this planet - to be of value to others.

But what is value?
How is it determined?
How is it conferred?
Or is it intangible and philosophically undefinable?  

The truth is it's very simple, concrete, and obvious.  It's whether people have the courage to admit what the nature of value is.

"Imagine you are the most talented heart surgeon in the world.  Or perhaps the best chef on the planet.  Maybe you’re the best musical composer of all time.  Or perhaps you are simply the greatest mom in the history of moms.

Now put yourself alone on Mars with nobody around you.

What you will soon realize is that without other people it doesn’t matter that you’re the greatest surgeon, the greatest chef, the best music composer, or the universe’s greatest mom.  Without other people to recognize or avail themselves of your abilities you have no value.  You are technically worthless.

Predictably, some will argue that you have at least some philosophical value in being the best.  That just because you are a music composer on Mars and create the universe’s greatest song doesn’t mean it doesn’t have value.  It’s a great song that just needs somebody to discover it.  But that makes the point even more so.  Not until somebody else discovers it will it have purpose, meaning, or value.  It will remain a piece of paper with notes written on it, indistinguishable from the matter of Martian dust that surrounds it until another sentient being finds it and can appreciate it.

This is the key thing to understand about value – specifically, what gives humans value.  That you cannot be an individual and confer value upon yourself.  The option to declare yourself “valuable” or “worthy” does not exist.  Value is completely dependent upon the existence of other people.  And it can only originate from and be given by other people.

Therefore, if you wish to have any value (at least here on planet Earth), you need to do one of two things.  You either produce something of value other humans will willingly transact their time for through the use of money (as money is nothing more than their time converted into a physical exchangeable form), or you be an interesting enough human that people willingly spend their time directly with you as friends, colleagues, or lovers.  But in either case, you will soon realize it is the transference of humans’ only and most precious commodity – time – that determines all value in society.  Not money.  Not traits.  Not your gender.  And not your political religion.  Other people’s time.

This makes perfect sense since time is really the only commodity humans have.  It is the only currency they can trade in.  And so it should be no surprise that what ultimately determines the value of an individual human is how much of other people’s time they command either through the labor they offer or being such an interesting person people willingly want to spend their time with them.  But to achieve either, be you a highly-paid surgeon or simply “The World’s Most Interesting Man,” there is only one way to do it.

Through accomplishments.

And accomplishments are all that really matter in life.

It takes absolutely nothing to be “Latino.”  It takes absolutely nothing to be “female.”  It takes absolutely nothing to be a “pacifist.”  And it takes absolutely nothing to declare yourself a “tanqueraysexual.”  Nobody cares.  Nobody is going to pay you for it.  Your traits offer nothing of value to anyone.  But if you’re a surgeon or a hang-glider or a software engineer or an entrepreneur or a beautiful woman or a race car driver or somebody who is in great physical shape, you not only likely command a very high wage, but are sought after by friends and the opposite sex alike.

Alas, given the choice as to whether people would spend their precious time with “The World’s Most Interesting Man” or “The World’s Most Typical Millennial,” there’s no choice.  Everybody will want to invest their time with the accomplished individual over the person who’s masturbating over their traits, their sociology degree, and demanding BGI.  And it’s also why we can all readily identify “The World’s Most Interesting Man” (though fictional), but have a blurred non-descript image of “The World’s Most Typical Millennial.”  One is accomplished.  The other merely exists.  One has value.  The other does not.  And at the genetic level you want to trade your time with people of value because quality people improve your life.

Regardless, this explains why accomplishments have value and traits do not. Why people who try to make a living on their traits are usually impoverished panhandlers compared to those who make a living through their accomplishments.  There is demand for accomplishments, but not traits.  But this also presents younger generations a very clear choice in life.  A fork in the road that will determine whether you piss away your life or make it count.  And it’s simply whether you want to live an accomplished life or not.

The path to an accomplished life may be rigorous, arduous, challenging, and difficult, but you will become an accomplished individual.  You will be an accountant, a father, a mother, a builder, a kayaker, a distiller, a grandma, a motorcyclist, an inventor, or whatever it is you set out to be.  You will not only have a volume of work and a legacy to leave behind, but you will have been handsomely compensated for your profession and ideally loved by all the people in your life.  You will not once mention in your list of accomplishments a “trait” you had or a “belief” you held because it will have never occurred to you to mention such stupid things.  And when you die you will have no regrets because you will have made your life count being of professional value to society and being of personal value to the people you loved and cared about.

The other path is the one officially sanctioned by the Millennial political religion.  A seemingly easier path, that is in reality the really hard path.  One where society not only owes you a living, but *must* value you simply because your mother did not abort you.  That in merely existing you are somehow great, of value, and of worth to society.  And there is no need to labor or toil to accomplish anything in life because you are blessed with having “Trait X” and “Trait Y,” not to mention you hold “Belief A” and “Belief B” - the politically correct views that are of ultimate human value.  But as you constantly panhandle your way through life, trying to get the world to worship your traits, precious seconds tick away as nobody wants to have anything to do with you, either through employment or a personal life.  And what people do spend their time with you are usually the same low-grade caliber of people, equally wasting their time on this planet.  And upon your death bed nobody will care, nobody will attend, and like most people’s lives, it will not have mattered.  You will have left no genuine legacy, rendering your existence in this universe truly pointless.  And the truest testament as to just what a pathetic life you will have lived will be that the biggest accomplishment in life will have been your “College Experience.”  A college degree that got you nowhere except poverty.

There is no clearer picture to younger generations than what the costs and consequences are in choosing traits over accomplishments in life than the Millennial generation.  And while the Millennials were heavily lobbied to value things they were born with over what they actually did after they were born, it doesn’t change the fact that they still chose the wrong path and consequently destroyed their lives.  And even though your parents, your teachers, your counselors, your politicians, the media, and nearly every institution will do everything they can to get you to value your traits over your abilities, for your own sake and your own precious life you cannot put any value in your traits.  You must derive all your value in life through your accomplishments.  Because if you don’t you simply will have no reason to live."

It's Too Late to "Finish Your Education"

Working on my next project and in my research came across this gem.

Millennials' #2 concern is "finishing their education."

THE AVERAGE MILLENNIAL IS 30!

Dude, you are 40% DEAD!  Your youth is ENTIRELY GONE!  When the fuck do you call it quits, admit school has been a scam, get a fucking job, and start living life.  You've been in school for A QUARTER FUCKING CENTURY and you're STILL FINISHING EDUCATION??????

Future leaders my ass.

Why the Coronavirus is Better for Millennials Than College

This post does not endorse any financial advice and all advice herein is horrible and will likely cause you to lose all your money, your house, and your wife.   Talk to a financial advisor about investing, not this horrifically-bad-at-economics blog.

Well, let's be honest first.

College was in reality about the worst thing to happen to the Millennials.  A swift kick in the nuts would have served the Millennials better than college, so it isn't that hard of a "gift" to beat. 

But I am being deadly serious when I say that Coronavirus is better for the Millennials than college, and I will go further to say it's the best thing to happen to them in their lives.  Because while the world frets that it's about to come to an end, countries issue travel bans, countries go under lock down, and corporations allow you to work from home (which now you KNOW it's bad) there is something else happening to the Millennials' great great favor.

Prices are going down.

Though related to a separate incident, I noticed the price of gas dropped to $1.92 in my area.  I already knew stock prices had been dropping due to Coronachan, but it was that harsh drop that reminded me of how I yearned for the Great Recession days where gas was cheap, hotels were cheap, lines at nice restaurants were non-existent.  And while everybody runs around with their heads chopped off, thinking this is the end of the world, this is in fact a good thing.

A very very good thing.

Right now Millennials complain about everything being expensive.  And they're right, it is. They voted for previous presidents to print off money to bail people out of the banking crisis and their poor personal choices, but that money inevitably found its way into the housing and stock markets, driving prices (and rents) up beyond affordable levels for the Millennials.  Since then, millennials have been paying over-exaggerated prices in rent and what few were lucky enough to afford it, over exaggerated prices for stocks.  And with these two items being overly expensive - housing and retirement - it was likely they were never achieve these two key pillars of the American Dream (but they did pay laughably stupid high prices for "the college experience"). 

But now, thanks to their Lord and Savior - Coronachan - prices are coming down.

Keep in mind the stock market would have to be halved to get back to what would be traditionally considered "average" or "fairly" priced.  The dividend yield is around 2.1%, it would need to be 5% so we still have some ways to go.  But with the media - not Coronavirus - scaring the hell out of everything in the world, the stock market has had a "20% Off Sale" in just 2 trading days.  It may not be fairly valued, but it is 20% cheaper than it was before.

This has only affected the stock market, but there is a chance this scare will last long enough it can spill into the housing market.  With different companies shutting down operations, no matter how temporary, with nearly every American living paycheck to paycheck, temporary furloughs can wreak havoc on the housing market, and thus housing prices.  I personally don't see this happening (truth be told, with China cutting off exports, construction materials could actually cause a jump in housing), but if Coronavirus sticks around long enough to effect the core, infrastructure of the real economy, it's possible Millennials might see affordable housing in some areas of the country...though that would mean they'd have to give up living in cool, socialist, prestige status towns like San Francisco, Austin, and New York and find jobs in towns they can afford to live in.

Regardless of how we get to lower prices, the point is a simple lesson in economics - you want lower prices.  One of the largest failings of the average American and their understanding of economics is that lower prices for EVERYTHING is good.  Not just gas, clothes, or food at happy hour - everything.  And if you look at your budget you'll find that lodging and retirement are two of your largest expense items, the lowering of which would drastically increase your standard of living.  Young people especially should be cheering the stock market and housing market to plummet in price because it would be the best financial thing to happen to them in their lives.  But more so than they think, and I shall explain why. 

Because if the stock market or housing goes down any more than it has, whatever over-inflated prices Millennials paid for their laughably stupid college education, they will save it in housing and retirement.  That $1.5 trillion you're asking to be bailed out of, has been more than offset by the multiple trillions of dollars the stock market has lost.  And if Millennials wanted to have the power to do something about it, instead of outsource all hope and power to Bernie to bail them out, now would be the time to consider tossing a couple bucks into a retirement account or inquiring with your local bank about getting approved for a mortgage.

The problem, however, I can already forecast in looking at the average person's personal finances.  Most people (not just Millennials) spend all the money they make.  They have no extra money left over or earmarked for retirement.  They need those extra monies for specialty brew pubs, car loans they took out (while complaining about student loans), and other first world luxuries instead of saving for retirement.  So even though the Goddess Coronachan is giving you Millennials the opportunity to recoup the excessive costs of your college degrees, you aren't financially responsible or savvy enough to capitalize on it.  Besides, you'd have to spend 10 minutes setting up a retirement account and it's just going to be easier to vote for Bernie to take other people's money from them anyway.  I know how lazy the Millennials are.

But regardless of the sloth of the Millennial generation, an economic curiosity does need to be pointed out.  And that economic curiosity is that Coronavirus - a virus that sickens and occasionally kills people - has proven to been better for the Millennials THAN A COLLEGE DEGREE.    Coronavirus - combined with a Sky-Is-Falling media - is the best thing to happen economically to the Millennials IN THEIR ENTIRE LIVES.

It's just whether they're smart enough to realize this...but given their college degrees, I doubt it.
__________________________

The post sponsored by 

"How Not to Become a Millennial"

What Has Socialism Done for Millennials?

An important question many Millennials need to ask themselves.
You can find the book here.

Will American Journalists Learn Their "Chicken Little" Lesson from Coronavirus?

Millennials are so cute.

They think global warming is both real and new.  But as a veteran of America and the American education/media system I've seen a bevy of "global warmings" before.

My earliest recollection was global cooling.  I am old enough to remember it, though not fully understand it.  I was told by my "elders" we were due for another ice age, and was more excited about the return of woolly mammoth than how well the 70's insulation was in our house.  But I was assured there'd be a lot more snow days when this inevitable ice age came.

The second was (of all things) the evil paper companies who were going to cut down every single tree in America.

Never mind this lie was told to me by a then-24 year old ditz with an education degree.
Never mind most trees are unprofitable to cut down and turn to paper.
Never mind paper companies have acres of trees they grow under specific conditions to make them easier to produce into paper.

Nope, Georgia Pacific was going to cut down every single tree and all of America would look like Nebraska.

The third time the sky was falling was the rain forests of the Amazon.  We were told (by those same low-IQ "teachers") that the Amazon rainforest was the "lungs" of the world. And without them, we would all run out of oxygen.  And if we just donated what little money our then-12 year old hands had, somehow that would stop the deforestation in a country some 4,000 miles away.  The remnant of that lie still remains today with the "Rain Forest Cafe" which you can still visit - and get shitty food at - at the Mall of America.

On the heels of "the Amazon rain forest" was "the ozone layer."  Without it we would all die of skin cancer because evil corporations wanted to kill their customers...making perfect sense.  And in a blatant Orwellian aim to scaremonger children into environmentalism (and homosexuality, no seriously, think about it) a cartoon called "Captain Planet" was created making little nazi-do-gooding crusaders of children who didn't know any better.

The fifth time the sky was falling (and still is) was global warming.  Many of our then high-school minds said, "wait a minute, what about the ice age that was going to kill us all...and bring back woolly mammoth?"  But that didn't matter.  Climatologists forgot to carry the one or something, and now it was unbearable heat that was going to kill all of humanity, not bone-chilling temperatures.

Since that time climatologists, government, teachers, professors, media, and journalists have stuck with global warming as the scaremonger's choicie de jour, but since then we've had several more instances of the sky falling.  Specifically viruses that were all going to wipe us out.

First it was swine flu.
Then it was bird flu.
Then it was SARS.
Then it was MERS.
Then it was Zika.
Ebola made a short come back for a second there.
And now it's Coronavirus.

But to your average 15 year old Gen Z'er or his older Millennial brother who's still living at home, they think this is the end of the world (though wasn't that last week when Trump killed an Iranian general which was going to prompt WWIII?).

So I think I speak for most of the mature, adult American population when I say this, but

"Dear journalists, teachers, media, and government officials.  Please just shut the fuck up."

I am fully aware that the Coronavirus *might* be a real threat to the world.  It might be a real epidemic that *may* cause a bubonic plague-like death rate last seen in the 1300's.  I know we should be doing what we need to do to stop it's spreading.  But I'm sorry, you've lied to the American public so many times before to get subscriptions, viewership, political donations, government funding, or (now) clicks/traffic.  And you've cried wolf long enough that nobody is taking you seriously as they should.

At one time, the job of the media was to act as the 4 branch of government; the nervous system of a democracy to not only keep tabs on government and government officials, but to inform the American public what was going on.  But this required first and above all else a commitment to truth.  A commitment to reality.  And it's become painfully obvious over the decades that nobody in journalism, media, education or the government is interested in that. You're interested in sensationalism, ginning up fear, making mountains out of molehills, all to generate income or for political power.

Now, I know you're all journalism majors and thus incredibly stupid, but the story of "The Little Boy Who Cried Wolf" should maybe be taught at the laughable "Journalism" programs various worthless colleges and universities offer. And the jist of the story is that a little boy cried wolf all the time to the villagers so he could get attention.  Soon the villagers stopped listening because he was an idiot, attention-whoring journalism major...errr...."boy."  But one day a real coronavirus...errr...wolf showed up.  And when he cried wolf, nobody came to save him and the wolf ate the boy.

This is the real price American media, journalism, and even educational professionals are paying - your validity.  Nobody really believes you anymore.  You are no more respected than the British journalism industry which is nothing more than tabloids and the BBC.  And you are no more legitimate than "true TV" with fake shows like "The Bachelor" "Storage Wars" "Maurry Povich" or "Dr. Phil."  You predominantly peddle fiction, not investigative journalism or facts, and nobody is listening to you anymore.

If (and that's a big IF) coronavirus turns out to be a big wolf, the American media will have blood on its hands for dulling Americans' senses over the decades to the point they no longer take you seriously.  So please either develop some principles, return to real journalism, report the truth, or just shut the fuck up.

This post sponsored by a book no journalist or 

American media member would identify with.

CURSE OF THE HIGH IQ!

Buy one if you didn't go to J-school.

The Depleted Husks of American Women

This is an excerpt from the book "How Not to Become a Millennial."  It's within the subsection called "The Vagina Industrial Complex" which highlights just how much money various industries extract from women convincing them their careers and their politics are more important than love and human beings.  The numbers are tragic, with multiple trillions of dollars every year in extra taxes, corporate sales, tuition, and lower labor costs being transferred from women to governments, corporations, and colleges.  But the real tragedy is how their entire youth is squandered on - what inevitably becomes - pointless careers and petty politics.  The last stop on this train is "The Husk" where whatever chances, hope, potential, and value a woman may have had is gone and depleted.  Half the population, regrettable as it may be, no longer have any natural or biological interest in them.  The majority of these women have worthless degrees and marginal careers that wouldn't hold a candle to the love of a nuclear family.  Their finances are non-existent as shoes and travel were more important than 401k's and IRA's.  But instead of blaming the industries/people who told them to hop on this train, they howl angrily at the "patriarchical moon," completing the stereotype with cats.  It's one of the more depressing, yet more intellectually stimulating chapter within the book.  Consider purchasing it if you wish to avoid the fate of becoming a "Gen X" or "Millennial spinster."

"Once the Vagina Industrial Complex is done extracting all of your youth, money, time, and labor out of you, it no longer has any use for you.  You paid for a worthless college degree (and thrice its price in interest) all so you could enrich Big Education.  You slaved your entire life away for a corporation all so you could enrich Corporate America and the government.  You spent all your money on shoes, travel, and handbags (and once again thrice its price in interest) enriching the banks.  You outsourced your children, further enriching the government and ensuring a future generation of children would be equally duped.  And if you didn’t have children, you spent one last final $50,000 on a 20% chance you’d end up with a child, with only a 50% chance they’d have a father around.  After that at best you’ll have a good career, and there’s nothing wrong with that.  But without other humans in your life you will end up like everybody else does in life - old, unattractive, lonely, and nobody wanting anything to do with you anymore. Only your country’s socialist party might pay you a visit in the hopes to bribe you to vote for them with other people’s money.  But beyond that you have no point or purpose.  This is the result of playing the gender victimhood racket.  This is the terminus of placing ultimate value in a trait you were born with and not other humans.  In thinking you could “have it all” you ended up with nothing.

Young women today need to look at their “true believer” Millennial, Gen X, and even Baby Boomer sisters and ask themselves two very important questions.  One philosophical and the other practical.

Philosophically, do you really think gender has any value?  That a trait you were born with somehow holds intrinsic value?  And if you have this gender is it morally right of you to claim to be a victim because of it?  That you are entitled to things and other people’s money because of a trait you were born with?  Or should it be who you are, what you do, and what you accomplish in life that determines the quality and caliber of a person you are?

Practically, is there any advantage in placing value in one’s gender?  And is there any advantage in playing the gender victimhood racket?  If debt-laden, impoverished Millennial, Gen X, and Boomer women are any indication, and the true believers and followers of The Vagina Industrial Complex are any proof, placing value in your gender is a recipe for disaster.  It’s a guaranteed way to destroy your life and end it in loneliness and misery.  Admittedly, as a young person it’s hard to have the independent thought and critical thinking skills to counter the complete and total brainwashing everybody receives in school.  The K-college education system will do everything in its power to convince you to place value on your gender and to claim you’re a victim.  But younger generations of women really need to look at the depleted husks of feminist Gen X, Boomer, and soon-to-be Millennial women and ask themselves if they want to go down that path and end up the same."

Available in paperback, kindle and SOON to be audio

The Older Brother Podcast - The "Remain Happy at All Costs" Episode

Benzos
Stoicism, anger, and rage.
No, there are no smart intelligent men to be friends with near you.
Tax season.
Superchads.

Podcast here.
MP3 here.

Groggy Morning Podcast with Jack Napier

On with the boy today.