I'll take a swing at it Captain - with your permission. Also with the caveat that I am an old world man that believes in the old world institute of marriage.
1. Children should have a father, not mommy's current 'life partner' or new age variant.
2. A man should have a woman to keep house, clean and cook for him. There is nothing wrong with women performing their feminine arts unless you are a pasty faced, gender challenged new age liberal.
3. Pooling of resources and division of labour: if you are married and both working, your bills just about get cut in half and your earning power is doubled. House work and chores are also reduced.
4. Emotional fulfillment: men are providers, builders, hunters, and craftsmen. We are hardwired at the genetic level to do that, our wives and families benefit from that and their satisfaction with that in turn satisfies us. We need to be useful just as we need food, water and air.
5. Marriage - an honest one, not the weasel worded contracts that pass for 'marriage' today - is the best gift a man can give himself. It gives you something to do, a reason for living, and incredible strength and support in times of adversity.
I met my wife in high school. She was my first girlfriend, actually, and we got married young and we are still together today. 28 years now. My woman owns my heart and soul and I wouldn't have it any other way. Likewise, if ever I am with my back against the wall, my guns empty and the bolts locked back with a pile of brass at my feet and the monsters closing in...my wife will be there with me.
One of the worst things liberals ever did to themselves was to make marriage and family a bad joke. We are genetically engineered to live that way in those social groups. Some people can and do live outside those arrangements happily - but most that try to...don't.
That's the best I can do Captain. Trying to explain true marriage to somebody that doesn't understand it is like trying to explain the concept of air to a fish. Relationships and dalliances have 'partners'. True marriage requires a man and a woman that are capable of living up to the requirements of being husbands and wives.
1 - To support and sustain feminism, since it is artificial. Women typically consume. Men typically produce. Without men, it all falls apart. Pay for her dammit. Spend, spend, spend. And remember to save for the gynocracy.
2 - To participate in an union that is no longer valid but that still acts as if it is. It has been debased with feminist laws and culture but hey: kiss the feet of the Victorian Princess and shower her with affection/chilvary you White Knight, or else you're a misogynist. Remember that you will get nothing in return.
3 - Because we can't bo baaaaack. What are you a retrogade? Progress. Go forward. Progress into falling off a cliff please. Into destruction. This is reasonable. Destroy the family structure and civilization so that the wominz and the Good Men Project can take place.
4 - Don't be stupid, retarded, uneducated or insane. Be part of the enlightened. The wise. The just.
5 - *Anything that supports the modern liberal order*
I've been with my girlfriend for ten years now, and I'm proposing next month.
Why? It's pretty simple- we realized (finally) that while our families have never pressured us to do this, they have been waiting for a reason to pass things down and sort out their affairs.
We're talking paid-off SoCal rental homes here, not jewelry or some bullshit 'antiques' they've been hoarding. Cold, hard equity and income in one fell swoop.
So yeah, when we heard my cousin say that my 92 year-old grandfather was 'waiting' on us it became priority numero uno.
Well, back in the 50's (to use the decade the libs claim Romney will be bringing women back to) men got married to: 1. Have a stable household 2. Have someone to bring up the kids 3. Have someone to cook, clean, and otherwise assist in provision of the above mentioned stable household. 4. To have socially condoned sex 5. to have a companion to grow old with.
None of those reasons apply any more. Feminism made sure of that.
So, to answer your question. There is one and only one reason for a man to get married. If that man desires children, and that man manages to find a woman willing to raise those children (or support the family while the man takes on the domestic chores)
Yeah, that's it.
The only reason that a man would want to marry is if he wants children and wants to raise them in a traditional household. (Oh, and he finds a woman that understand that situation is not somehow demeaning to her.)
So, back to my previous point. Feminism has destroyed any reason why a man would want to marry.
I drew a blank. It's definitely the right question to ask.
Anon's got an okay list, but I've seen a fair number of marriages firsthand. They looked nothing like that. You'd have to get real lucky to find one along those lines, maybe lottery-number lucky. Never seen one in the wild.
Anon 9:02 hit it, if you can find a non-feminist who understands that marriage is a serious commitment. I found one and we have been married for 13 years and counting.
I've been married for 33 years. That said, since those days, men have become the slaves of self-indulgent women, resulting in men being abused in damned near every way possible.
They use you in the relationship, then dump you and you get stuck paying child support and alimony even though she makes more than you. Men just become their bitch to be manipulated, abused and then dumped.
I can't find a reason, especially if you have a friend with benefits for occasional sex.
If I were to lose my wife, I don't believe I'd remarry. Dumb to do so.
Just because I could get myself laid without being married does not mean that my life would be the same if I was single. The mass abandonment of traditional values didn't make them obsolete, it just means there are fewer quality people out there. I've found one. So it seems have a couple other commentators. Of course in the current legal climate our wives could make off with all our stuff. It is precisely the point that they don't. Fidelity without legal restraint is the only real kind.
Five reasons to get married? I'm not sure I can do that. However, I can come up with five improvements in my life since I got married.
1) The food is a lot better. Prior to meeting my future wife, I had a severe case of food burnout. Eating was not something I did for pleasure, but rather for nutrition. This was probably due to a steady diet of career-encouraged fast-food combined with my own lack of cooking skills. My relationship with my wife fixed this: She likes to cook new & exotic dishes and I like variety in my food. Our standing agreement is she cooks and I clean the kitchen. So far this has worked out really well.
2) I dress a lot better. Most people in the tech industry dress like flood victims. So do a lot of single people. In practice it’s difficult to sort them out. The wife has encouraged me to dress better, and has helped a lot with the establishment of a good wardrobe. I’ll admit that I have to keep a tight rein on things, as most women love shopping and it would be all too easy for this to get out of hand (see below).
3) I am a lot more social now. This includes doing things I never would have done while single and just being a lot more friendly. This is especially true when we go out together. I can honestly say that it is only since I have gotten married, that I know all of my neighbors.
4) I have learned a lot from my Father-in-Law. He has a number of skills that are new to me (re-stringing a bow, and precision cabinet-making with basic tools), and he is more than willing to sit down and work with me on them.
5) I have learned how to say no to someone without being a douche, and how to be assertive without being angry. This may not sound like much, but I was raised to be severely subservient. That will not work (for long) in a marriage. I also used to have severe anger-management issues. I’m not going to say that is resolved (it never will be), but I can say that my current relationship status suggests that it has greatly improved.
I’m not saying it’s all wine and roses. It can be a challenge. My job is to get a good ROI. Your mileage may vary.
Anon 9:02 lays it out pretty well. I'm certain that my father is happier because he married my mother. I believe that marrying a good woman is a step up for a man's life, to say nothing of the benefits for children and society as a whole.
If the woman you choose is a selfish new age skank, then all bets are off. You're better off being single forever than marrying one of those.
Surveys have consistently shown that married people (both men and women, across age groups) are significantly more likely to respond that they are "very happy" than single people. Republicans are also happier than Democrats even after controlling for income (rich people are happier, and Republicans are richer on average than Democrats).
Have found one, but still need more reasons than that? You don't yet know how lucky you are to have found somebody worth trusting with your life, so you're not ready for marriage and shouldn't get married. Let her back out into the dating pool, so some dude who knows what's what can find her, while you go back to coping with the products of modern feminism until you wise up.
Why should men get married? They shouldn't. "Men" shouldn't do anything. Nor should "women". Only individuals do things, not groups, and the question of whether this individual man should marry that individual woman has more to do with the specifics of the individuals than anything to do with "men" or "women".
But hey...let's pretend that by "men" what we really mean is "the majority of men, aggregated together by an outside observer for the purpose of doing statistics on them, like in 102-level Macro-econ". The simple answer is the same -- no, "men" should not get married. Because (leaving aside the relatively rare case of early widowhood) each marriage-worthy woman can only have one husband, and the supply of men exceeds the supply of women worth marrying by several orders of magnitude, the overwhelming majority of men will either remain unmarried or else marry women that they shouldn't.
Which is a shame, really, because commenter #4 is right.
17 comments:
1. To obtain a mother in law
2. to sign up for alimony
3. to pay her student loans
4. to get bossed around
5. to fix her car
I tried. I could only get one, and a shotgun was involved.
I tried. I could only think of one, and a shotgun was involved.
I'll take a swing at it Captain - with your permission. Also with the caveat that I am an old world man that believes in the old world institute of marriage.
1. Children should have a father, not mommy's current 'life partner' or new age variant.
2. A man should have a woman to keep house, clean and cook for him. There is nothing wrong with women performing their feminine arts unless you are a pasty faced, gender challenged new age liberal.
3. Pooling of resources and division of labour: if you are married and both working, your bills just about get cut in half and your earning power is doubled. House work and chores are also reduced.
4. Emotional fulfillment: men are providers, builders, hunters, and craftsmen. We are hardwired at the genetic level to do that, our wives and families benefit from that and their satisfaction with that in turn satisfies us. We need to be useful just as we need food, water and air.
5. Marriage - an honest one, not the weasel worded contracts that pass for 'marriage' today - is the best gift a man can give himself. It gives you something to do, a reason for living, and incredible strength and support in times of adversity.
I met my wife in high school. She was my first girlfriend, actually, and we got married young and we are still together today. 28 years now. My woman owns my heart and soul and I wouldn't have it any other way. Likewise, if ever I am with my back against the wall, my guns empty and the bolts locked back with a pile of brass at my feet and the monsters closing in...my wife will be there with me.
One of the worst things liberals ever did to themselves was to make marriage and family a bad joke. We are genetically engineered to live that way in those social groups. Some people can and do live outside those arrangements happily - but most that try to...don't.
That's the best I can do Captain. Trying to explain true marriage to somebody that doesn't understand it is like trying to explain the concept of air to a fish. Relationships and dalliances have 'partners'. True marriage requires a man and a woman that are capable of living up to the requirements of being husbands and wives.
Er..sorry for the novel, fellas.
1 - To support and sustain feminism, since it is artificial. Women typically consume. Men typically produce. Without men, it all falls apart. Pay for her dammit. Spend, spend, spend. And remember to save for the gynocracy.
2 - To participate in an union that is no longer valid but that still acts as if it is. It has been debased with feminist laws and culture but hey: kiss the feet of the Victorian Princess and shower her with affection/chilvary you White Knight, or else you're a misogynist. Remember that you will get nothing in return.
3 - Because we can't bo baaaaack. What are you a retrogade? Progress. Go forward. Progress into falling off a cliff please. Into destruction. This is reasonable. Destroy the family structure and civilization so that the wominz and the Good Men Project can take place.
4 - Don't be stupid, retarded, uneducated or insane. Be part of the enlightened. The wise. The just.
5 - *Anything that supports the modern liberal order*
Thanks for taking a positive crack at it, Anon 9:02.
I decided years ago I wanted either one of the kind of marriages you described, or celibacy. Nothing else would match up to my Christian beliefs.
I finally found a decent one and married her a bit over a year ago. We're trying to get it as right on the old school model as we can manage.
I've been with my girlfriend for ten years now, and I'm proposing next month.
Why? It's pretty simple- we realized (finally) that while our families have never pressured us to do this, they have been waiting for a reason to pass things down and sort out their affairs.
We're talking paid-off SoCal rental homes here, not jewelry or some bullshit 'antiques' they've been hoarding. Cold, hard equity and income in one fell swoop.
So yeah, when we heard my cousin say that my 92 year-old grandfather was 'waiting' on us it became priority numero uno.
Well, back in the 50's (to use the decade the libs claim Romney will be bringing women back to) men got married to:
1. Have a stable household
2. Have someone to bring up the kids
3. Have someone to cook, clean, and otherwise assist in provision of the above mentioned stable household.
4. To have socially condoned sex
5. to have a companion to grow old with.
None of those reasons apply any more. Feminism made sure of that.
So, to answer your question. There is one and only one reason for a man to get married. If that man desires children, and that man manages to find a woman willing to raise those children (or support the family while the man takes on the domestic chores)
Yeah, that's it.
The only reason that a man would want to marry is if he wants children and wants to raise them in a traditional household. (Oh, and he finds a woman that understand that situation is not somehow demeaning to her.)
So, back to my previous point. Feminism has destroyed any reason why a man would want to marry.
I drew a blank. It's definitely the right question to ask.
Anon's got an okay list, but I've seen a fair number of marriages firsthand. They looked nothing like that. You'd have to get real lucky to find one along those lines, maybe lottery-number lucky. Never seen one in the wild.
Anon 9:02 hit it, if you can find a non-feminist who understands that marriage is a serious commitment. I found one and we have been married for 13 years and counting.
I think Anonymous misread the question. It was "Why should men get married?" not "Why did men get married 50 years ago?"
I've been married for 33 years. That said, since those days, men have become the slaves of self-indulgent women, resulting in men being abused in damned near every way possible.
They use you in the relationship, then dump you and you get stuck paying child support and alimony even though she makes more than you. Men just become their bitch to be manipulated, abused and then dumped.
I can't find a reason, especially if you have a friend with benefits for occasional sex.
If I were to lose my wife, I don't believe I'd remarry. Dumb to do so.
I love my wife of 7 years, and I must say since we have been together I have not had to train a anyone new to make a proper sandwich.
Just because I could get myself laid without being married does not mean that my life would be the same if I was single. The mass abandonment of traditional values didn't make them obsolete, it just means there are fewer quality people out there. I've found one. So it seems have a couple other commentators. Of course in the current legal climate our wives could make off with all our stuff. It is precisely the point that they don't. Fidelity without legal restraint is the only real kind.
Five reasons to get married? I'm not sure I can do that. However, I can come up with five improvements in my life since I got married.
1) The food is a lot better. Prior to meeting my future wife, I had a severe case of food burnout. Eating was not something I did for pleasure, but rather for nutrition. This was probably due to a steady diet of career-encouraged fast-food combined with my own lack of cooking skills. My relationship with my wife fixed this: She likes to cook new & exotic dishes and I like variety in my food. Our standing agreement is she cooks and I clean the kitchen. So far this has worked out really well.
2) I dress a lot better. Most people in the tech industry dress like flood victims. So do a lot of single people. In practice it’s difficult to sort them out. The wife has encouraged me to dress better, and has helped a lot with the establishment of a good wardrobe. I’ll admit that I have to keep a tight rein on things, as most women love shopping and it would be all too easy for this to get out of hand (see below).
3) I am a lot more social now. This includes doing things I never would have done while single and just being a lot more friendly. This is especially true when we go out together. I can honestly say that it is only since I have gotten married, that I know all of my neighbors.
4) I have learned a lot from my Father-in-Law. He has a number of skills that are new to me (re-stringing a bow, and precision cabinet-making with basic tools), and he is more than willing to sit down and work with me on them.
5) I have learned how to say no to someone without being a douche, and how to be assertive without being angry. This may not sound like much, but I was raised to be severely subservient. That will not work (for long) in a marriage. I also used to have severe anger-management issues. I’m not going to say that is resolved (it never will be), but I can say that my current relationship status suggests that it has greatly improved.
I’m not saying it’s all wine and roses. It can be a challenge. My job is to get a good ROI. Your mileage may vary.
Anon 9:02 lays it out pretty well. I'm certain that my father is happier because he married my mother. I believe that marrying a good woman is a step up for a man's life, to say nothing of the benefits for children and society as a whole.
If the woman you choose is a selfish new age skank, then all bets are off. You're better off being single forever than marrying one of those.
Surveys have consistently shown that married people (both men and women, across age groups) are significantly more likely to respond that they are "very happy" than single people. Republicans are also happier than Democrats even after controlling for income (rich people are happier, and Republicans are richer on average than Democrats).
http://pewresearch.org/pubs/301/are-we-happy-yet
There's really only one.
1. You've found a woman you trust that much.
Haven't found such a creature? Don't get married.
Have found one, but still need more reasons than that? You don't yet know how lucky you are to have found somebody worth trusting with your life, so you're not ready for marriage and shouldn't get married. Let her back out into the dating pool, so some dude who knows what's what can find her, while you go back to coping with the products of modern feminism until you wise up.
Why should men get married? They shouldn't. "Men" shouldn't do anything. Nor should "women". Only individuals do things, not groups, and the question of whether this individual man should marry that individual woman has more to do with the specifics of the individuals than anything to do with "men" or "women".
But hey...let's pretend that by "men" what we really mean is "the majority of men, aggregated together by an outside observer for the purpose of doing statistics on them, like in 102-level Macro-econ". The simple answer is the same -- no, "men" should not get married. Because (leaving aside the relatively rare case of early widowhood) each marriage-worthy woman can only have one husband, and the supply of men exceeds the supply of women worth marrying by several orders of magnitude, the overwhelming majority of men will either remain unmarried or else marry women that they shouldn't.
Which is a shame, really, because commenter #4 is right.
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