I are sick.
I are very sick.
So sick in fact I could not sleep this morning and woke up around 6AM (whenst your Captain normally wakes up at 10AM).
But I made the mistake, or perhaps the best move of my life, when I posted on my Facebook account that I was very sick.
Soon, as various femme fatales of the Cappy Cap Crew got to work, logged onto the internet and saw I was sick, the offers to "take care of me" flooded in.
"Oh, is there anything you need?"
"Can I make you a sandwich?"
"Hi baby, you know you're spoiled, but if you need help with anything tonight, let me know!"
And now, despite being very sick, I have no less than 4 women coming to my house to help me with various chores tonight, including;
1. Electric work
2. Putting in a flue for a wood burning stove
3. General cleaning up of the Captain's Bachelor Pad
4. And the procurement and disassembly of some wood pallets that will make for great firewood this winter
Now many of you no doubt are asking, "where is the Captain going with this?"
And I will tell you.
I am doing nothing more than outright bragging right now.
Pure and simple bragging.
I have some of the nicest, sweetest, hottest and kindest babes in Minnesota coming over to pamper my sick ass, and not only pamper my sick ass, but to do construction work on my house! And it would be just plain unAmerican if I didn't share this with the world.
The moral of the story is if you're a guy "get sick." I don't know why, but when guys get sick, women feel this odd compunction to pamper them. It may feel horrible, but the benefits are most certainly worth it.