Monday, May 04, 2015

Why Charlize Theron Threatens "Fury Road"

Fury Road is coming out and I'm on the hinges as to whether I even want to review it.  Despite the trailer's explosions and pure awesomeness, the one thing that keeps me from fully committing is Charlize Theron's character who seems to take the entire leading role.  Terribly sorry, I'm done with fake, never-will-happen, female propagandist advertising.

Charlize Theron is a 5'4", 115 pound woman.  A reasonably aggressive, medium sized dog could outdo her and have her for dinner.  But yet, I'm supposed to sit here and accept the possibility she is the leader of a group of women and is on par with Tom Hardy's character who is the presum-ed replacement for Mel Gibson. 

No, not buying it.

I don't care how many explosions and tornadoes you put in your trailer.

I don't care how many "extreme" Aussie characters you have saying "WHAT A LOVELY DAY!!!!"

This entire movie reeks of a politically correct, leftist, feminist propaganda trap to sucker me in, pay my $10 for a ticket, only to walk away saying "WTF, no woman could do that!" as you then include my purchase and millions of other dupes' purchases to say "Fury Road" is the #1 movie in America.

Sorry, not falling for it.

I'm going to wait until the suckers go and see it, read the reviews, and THEN MAYBE contemplate parting with my hard earned money to see it.

In the meantime, I recommend all of you do the same.

Hollywood has desperately tried to court the female audience to the point it has alienated the male audience.  I suggest you men grow a pair and wait for the reviews to come out before wasting 3 hours of your life and $20 in tickets to see another "sermon" from Hollywood about "strong, powerful, independent" women.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Charlize Theron is a big broad, like 5'10.

Anonymous said...

Golda Meir, Margaret Thatcher, Eva Perón.

RJ said...

Don't go to see that. It's not about Mad Max at all, it's about how Charlize Theron breaks out of captivity with other female slaves and they teach their male captors the meaning of the old adage that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...by killing them.

TroperA said...

Ugh. Fury Road looks like the same "overproduced action set-piece" crap that's been par for the course in Hollywood for many years. One of the reasons I liked the old Mad Max movies is because they used stunts and practical effects--it was all skill on display. You knew that people were actually getting their asses kicked while making this movie. Now you've got CG and fancy swooping camera angles and bright orange and teal lighting and fights that look way too choreographed. I would much rather prefer a movie that's shot with in-world stunts that have to rely entirely on real world physics, than a movie that's all CG, where physics takes a vacation and people dance their way through a fight that ends with some big boring CG finale. How am I supposed to connect to the characters when I know they're just wireframe models in some high end computer?

If I want fancy, choreographed, eye-popping fights, I'll play a video game or watch animation. Those are supposed to be stylized forms of entertainment where form and physics can be liberated from real world considerations. When I see live action characters looking and moving like they belong in a cartoon I say to myself: "Damn, why didn't they just make this a cartoon? It would have been so much cooler."

Marshallaw said...

As actresses go she's pretty good. That said I think there's a whole lotta crazy goin on up in that pretty head. Mother shot father with a shotgun, years in Hollyweird, etc. My hunch is her character in Young Adult would be close to the real Thereon. Dating Sean Penn.....nigga please!!!

Dr. Coyote said...

Looks like they've swapped the over-cute kids from the last movie for... something else equally distasteful. "Vagina Monologues" author? Really?

Thanks for the warning. Will stay tuned via reviews before I fork over my cash.

Anonymous said...

Ahhh nope. Not going to see it in the theatre. First it's BS, she's an anti-gun person, yet in this film she's toting a gun. Effing hypocrite. Guns for me and none for you plebes. Second, Hollywood sucks, and can't come up with anything new? Just retreading old ideas. Why should I be suckered into paying $40 (after popcorn and drinks) to watch this dreck. I'll watch the originals anytime, not this crapola.

Eric Mueller said...

I almost never watch movies in the theater. Since a movie is a fairly large commitment of time, if I hear good things about it, I'll watch it on Netflix or acquire it another way. I can't understand why people still go to theaters.

kotetu said...

Tall != big. Charlize Theron, at 5'9" is probably about 140 pounds.

I've only watched a couple of short trailers, but at least one of them seemed to indicate women were being treated as property, which is as I expected in a post apocalyptic mad max scenario.

Glen Filthie said...

Ayup. I will give it a pass too. Might rent it when it comes out on I-tunes maybe.

But yeah - I am sick and fuggin tired of Hollyweird using movies to push feminism, socialism and homosexuality as a way of indoctrinating our kids. The publishing industry's doing it too. A tip to the wise - if you see an SF book that is a 'Hugo Award Winner' - you probably have some stinker along the lines of "Faggots In Space" or "The Powerful Feminist Dyke Time Traveller" or "Commie Dragons". The problem with leftists is that original thought is a huge problem for them...so we keep seeing the same dreck recycled in their efforts at entertainment. GAH.

But there is hope. "Interstellar" was a good solid SF yarn. Automata seemed to be as well.

daniel_ream said...

This is timely. I've been slowly withdrawing from geek media over the last decade due to the ridiculous amount of estrogen poisoning, and I've been toying with the idea of soliciting the Captain's brigade of junior and deputy economists to put together a list of current TV and movies that aren't pandering to the female demographic.

At the moment I can highly recommend Netflix's Daredevil. The stunts are all live action, the women are in support roles, and the men get to kick ass with a high ideal or two.

Mike said...

I don't watch Hollywood's political tripe anymore. I haven't spent a dime on them in many years. They don't bother entertaining anymore because they're too busy with their silly Idiot Left political preaching.

One Fat Oz Guy said...

Sounds like Django Unchained, only set in the future and is about women as slaves instead of black slaves in the past.
I think Tarantino should sue!

Anonymous said...

Glen "Faggots in Space" is offensive call them Asstronauts. As for the movie I'll most likely have to pay big bucks for the 3d crap because my mother wants to see it for a late Mothers Day thing.