Monday, December 07, 2015

Dear English Teachers, Please Don't Give Career Advice

Just had to share this Asshole Consulting request.

The 11th grade English teacher of a client told him his pursuit of becoming a dental hygienist was pointless because it wasn't a 4 year degree.  I looked up median salaries for English teachers vs. dental hygienists and the dental hygienists make $20,000 a year more than English teachers.


8 comments:

Anonymous said...


Sure, a dental hygienist makes more money, but will never get summers off. Remember, the English teacher works only nine months out of the year.

Captain Capitalism said...

Outstanding point Anon610. That is an error on my part. Though, still, you're saving 2 years of life.

Paul, Dammit! said...

This one hits home. Girl I was friendly with, uberliberal but mostly OK when we were in our teens and early 20's, ends up an English teacher. She went to Harvard, I go to another Boston college on a 1/2 scholarship (we're both from the Boston 'burbs). I spend 4 years as a commercial fisherman, pump gas, shingle roofs, dig clams and scrape by. Her dad takes out a 2md mortgage. Grad school- I got to a state school, so does she. Me, for a science/policy degree, her for education.
By the time we're 25, I've quit being a scientist and policy hack, and join the merchant marines. Making 50k, at least 180 days a year dedicated to killing all God's animals and drinking. entry level. She's a teacher in the 'burbs. Maybe 35k? We both get summers off. She hates me now because of my politics but we have friends in common. She works at her father's business in the summer.
Fast forward to today. I still get 150-180 days a year to drink, salary is a lot more than doubled. She's maybe at 40k, still working summers.

If there's a shittier job than being an English teacher, I don't know what it could be. Unappreciated, unpaid, unable to pay student loans. Find me an English teacher who doesn't work summers, I'll show you a rich spouse. Otherwise, no way.


Dave S. said...

Awesome Theatrics. Awesome Message. Thanks, i loved it.
Dave (Adelaide, Australia)

Joanne Jacobs said...

Dental hygienists need a one-year certificate, though many go on to earn a two-year degree. It's one of the best-paying jobs relative to years of education. The working conditions are good and the hours often are flexible.

sth_txs said...

Nothing wrong with a vocational degree as long as you don't mind the 'icky' aspects of it.

Heroditus Huxley said...

My advice to my college students? Get a STEM degree, not a humanities degree. A humanities degree will get you a job that might let you afford the GOOD Ramen from Walmart.

Job Vacancies said...

It is rightly said that "Do What You Love"... No matter things what you "like" may give you less earning but for sure you will enjoy & excel in that field.

Job Vacancies