Friday, December 09, 2011

What the Captain Wants for Christmas

Because I am a cheap bachelor, I more or less have everything I want.

Then I saw this.

You girls want to make the bachelor in your life happy, this is what you get him.

7 comments:

daniel_ream said...

When I was about 13, my godfather gave me a ballpoint pen made out of two rifle cartridges welded together. He made them himself. Damn cool, it was.

Anonymous said...

Yo, Cappy,

There's NOTHING manly about that jewelry.

Championship Ring: manly.
Necklace of teeth ripped from your enemies' faces: manly.

Wedding ring: maybe manly.

Ear stud, earrings, cufflinks, other necklaces, etc, etc, NOT MANLY.

If you aren't a pirate, anything more than a watch, class/championship ring, and wedding ring (if applicable) is pure poseur, pretender, metrosexual, mangina, etc...

That includes jewelry made out of shell casings, shells, etc. Yes, even handgrenade pins, unless you have the teeth necklace from the bastards you blew up with all those handgrenades.

Captain Capitalism said...

What!!!????

The heck if those things aren't manly! I'm not getting the necklace, but the blue sapphire ring is definitely a must.

And the cufflinks. Hell yes!

I may even get the tuxedo buttons. BUt this guy is pretty pricey.

Anonymous said...

I suspect none of them are TSA-friendly, especially when the buffoons detain a passenger for having the outline of a pistol sewn on her purse.

Anonymous said...

As Eric Cartman would say...
"Kick Ass!"

Scot said...

I just wished they had used some major-label brass.

Pirran said...

"Necklace of teeth ripped from your enemies' faces: manly."

WTF!!!

ONLY if you habitually wear a pink shirt and vacuum the house in a tutu....

A necklace of dessicated human eyeballs may be considered manly.

Alternatively, a collection of fingers or earlobes preserved in olive oil...with a hint of balsamic...and a sprig of rosemary....