I hadn't been up more than 40 minutes before I was already pelted with another piece of leftist-religious propaganda telling me I should man up and start dating single mothers.
After the initial rage and anger subdued, however, I had a clear and intriguing thought:
"Why am I, a childless bachelor who didn't torpedo his life with an unwanted child, constantly asked, nearly commanded, to date and court single moms? Why are bachelors in general even a part of this? Shouldn't there be just as many single dads to go and date these single moms??? Why don't they go date themselves and leave us childless people alone?"
So my brain did some thinking in the shower.
What if there was a shortage of single dads? What if there were more single mothers than there were single fathers, thereby necessitating us childless bachelors who didn't screw up our lives go in and sop up the surplus supply of single moms.
It's certainly possible because a man can impregnate multiple women. Say a real Casanova, who's a little lax on the use of birth control knocks up three women. In this case you have ONE father, but THREE mothers, two of which at minimum have to be single mothers. However, it is also possible for there to be more fathers than there are mothers. A woman can have multiple children with multiple men resulting in a shortage of single moms. The question then becomes which scenario is more likely.
Based on the OK Cupid study (where women rated 80% of men unattractive) it suggests a classical 80/20 scenario where 20% of the men are making off with 80% of the women. You also throw in the natural tendency for women to trade up, it becomes more likely a scenario where you have fewer men knocking up more women, than more women getting impregnated by fewer men.
Then I realized something as stoking the morning fire.
"Hey! I'm an economist! And there's the Census Bureau! Why don't I just look up how many fathers there are in the country and how many mothers there are in the country and that will prove whether or not there is a surplus or deficit of fathers."
And shucks howdy, what do you know.
There are only 70.1 million fathers in the US
While there are 85.4 million mothers.
This means (optimistically assuming all fathers are married, which they're not) there's at least a surplus of 15 million single mothers.
Now, in all intellectual honesty, some of this can be chalked up to men dying before women. In other words grandpa kicks off and grandma is still alive, but grandma is not looking for a new man to save her. I tried to find data at the Census Bureau that would address age, but their data tables do not delve into that level of detail. Regardless, I think it is such a deficit that it can be safely assumed (until somebody wishes to do the research to prove otherwise) there are millions more single mothers looking to date than there are single fathers available because of the "Casanova Effect" (or whatever you want to call it).
In truth, this should be insulting to most bachelors who kept their nose clean. It means you have some of these women doing the 80/20 thing, thinking only 20% of men are good looking enough to sleep with, while the remaining 80% of you schmoes are not worth it....
That is until they get pregnant and then need you single, childless, non-screwed up "schmoes" to bail them out.
The truth is you already are financially bailing them out. In collecting things like WIC, EBT, and scores of other forms of government aid, not to mention the entire public school system, these women disproportionately force you to pay higher taxes for children that aren't even yours. You needn't pay double by giving them your company, affection and attention.
34 comments:
Your term 'Casanova Effect' reminded me of this guy;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNohGQv9o9g
Lol, the comments on that article are gold!
Hey Cap...love your site by the way.
Single mothers are only good for occasional pump and dumps. I figure I've already subsidized them enough with the 40% taxes (when you add them all up) I'm paying the gubmint.
I've thought it over, and fatherhood is a good idea only if you do it abroad.
I have a son who's in Anglo America and I'm divorced from his mother. I am actually glad I'm a father, and I am actively involved in my son's life, but I made the mistake of having my first child in America, and I'm paying dearly for that mistake...child support, lost time with him since she has custody, et al.
Any future children of mine will be born abroad.
On that note, I just found out last week that my 23-yr old girlfriend in Latin America is expecting our first baby. She's more mature than most 40-yr olds I know in 'Murica.
Funny thing, she actually WANTS to be a mother and WANTS to be a good woman for me. It's a cultural thing. Women are expected to be good to their men where she's from.
But, I won't be subject to child support and the general abuse that men endure here. My eventual plan is to expatriate anyway while Rome burns.
Just a thought I thought I'd share with anyone else who wants to become a father. You can do it, just make sure you don't do it here.
I have single mothers hitting on me on the street. They don't stand a chance.
They are not single mothers. They are unmarried mothers.
My friend thought that was screwed up but knew that it was true.
I was pretty much low income until the age of 50 but kept plugging away. Was responsible and knew it would be bad to bring a child up on low income(also higher rates of divorce with low income and the hypergamy fact). Now making decent money and have substantial assets. No female is getting a sniff of my assets.
The reason single-mom doesn't marry single-dad (as in the father of her child) is because single-dad is an alpha, plate-spinner who who has children by multiple women.
If the 80/20 rule about college sex is true (20% of college males are having 80% of the sex) then it seems logical to also assume that 20% of males are the dads of 80% of out-of-wedlock children.
Thus, it's your job as a responsible guy to compensate for the "dad shortage" by becoming Mr. beta-provider, marrying the single mom, and raising the alpha guy's kids.
I've got a post coming up called "Premarital Cuckoldry." It can be summed up by the above paragraph, which has become an institutionalized expectation in American society.
Have to absolutely agree. I've got about a year before my own son (I'm a single dad) is grown and on his own and I refuse to take on some other guy's baggage.
There are also a goodly number of single moms who have not repented. So instead of looking for a nice provider, they are merely looking for temp-daddy #3.
--Hale
Having been with single mothers, not one thing on that list of 15 things is true.
Not one.
"kill that baby. that baby ain't mine!" -Trick Daddy.
yeah, its ridiculous. strong, independent women, who kick the father out of their life, need to replace him, until they want to kick him out for a replacement and collect triple child support. "man up and marry those sluts"? nope.
It does not take into account that many men are raising children that do not belong to them without realising.
So if you take into account paternity fraud, which ranges from 5% to 30%, the number of fathers can drop to shall was say 66Million (~5% fraud).
The 15 points in that article are a laugh. Maybe only the Lasagna item is true, maybe.
Here's a wrinkle for us older guys (35+):
You get to a certain age and you encounter:
1. Single moms, never been married. (Non-starter)
2. Divorced moms.
3. Divorced women, no kids.
4. 35+ chicks! never married no kids.
Each brings their own set of problems, weirdness and pathologies to the table. Yeah I know, the answer is to date 19 year olds and if you can't pull that off yet, raise your value until you can.
But in the interim, you're going to reach an age where the above three are a sizeable chunk of your pool. So, thoughts? Of the above, number 3 is likely the least headache inducing.
If you're under 35 (dare I say even 40) no way should you go anywhere near those chicks, but let's say you're 50, you're no movie star, internet hero or millionaire, just a regular guy, what are viable options in your opinion?
Something I ponder.
Anonymous@12:21 -
Divorced women with *grown* kids.
That way you're not financially on the hook. I know a couple of guys who dated single/divorced mothers for a *long* time, and married them once the youngest turned 18.
Hey Cap! you should do a piece on this article here:
http://news.yahoo.com/fears-brat-ocracy-child-centred-sweden-032211025.html
Proof feminists DO make better parents................................LOL
The eharmony article isn't directed at men, it's target audience is women.
They are trying to pump up the egos of single moms so they'll jump into the dating pool (and hopefully buy an eharmony membership).
@Anon,
Marry a widow.
She stayed true to her vows once, which means she's likely to again.
This is the one instance where I would consider a woman with children.
Give that the average American woman already has enough baggage from the culture she grew up in...throwing single motherhood or divorcee into the mix is just asking for trouble.
Don't be a "Captain Save A Ho"...be a Captain (insert talent here).
There is another pitfall to dating single moms with kids. THE FUCKING LITTLE WOLVERINES WILL HATE YOU. I was dating a lovely woman with two of the meanest little fuckers you ever saw. I was so whipped I went to counseling with her to help our relationship. She told the counselor she could not discipline the kids because she was sad about them having no father. The final straw came when I referred to the little darlings as " Poster children for birth control " in front of the Catholic grandparents :-) Fast forward 20 years, I am happily married and not raising somebody else's kids.
My favorite comment of yours, Cap, about the explosion of female hypergamy starting with women born after 1970 and the consequential rise of game since the late 1990s.
"And all it cost them (the men who discovered game) was the ability to have families"
They left out "16. You're a pedo and her son/daughter is really cute."
Wow, they're taking some fire in the comments, too, eh? The occasional White Knight is there trying to shame guys into silence but holy crap it's overwhelmingly pro-red pill.
I've already emailed the Captain on this and like the rest of the morons and masses, he doesn't want to address it. Ready ? There are 2.2 million people in prison in the US. 2.1 million of them are men. Given the way skanks are attracted to scum, how many of the 2 million men in prison are fathers. Yeah. Most of them. So eliminate 2 million fathers from the the market and you have ... Yeah, what he said.
According to the census the US is 50.8% female with an estimated population of 314 million which means there are roughly 5 million more females than males. If you further look at the 65+ crowd you will see that the 5 million gap is entirely counted for by this subgroup of men.
At the maximum they all had children and they all left a widow and child. Meaning that your 15 million number shrinks to 10 million in the best case scenario for single women in terms of single fathers that have died off.
Fascinating read on the OKCupid blog article you linked to. Thanks.
AFA the eharmony article, I wonder if they think that most single mothers are the results of either death of the husband or a youthful indiscretion, versus what we know (or strongly suspect) in the manosphere?
PS Loved the comments section although I think that one fellow would score more points in debate if he would tone down his language a little.
Why would anyone want to impregnate a woman. This is no service to render to the child. The soul deserves better than flesh and blood.
The soul deserves to be it's own source of existence and you don't find this with a body made of flesh and blood that requires food, employment etc.
There is no dignity in human life, especially not in the context of market totalitarianism.
I'm going to build my own life form from scratch, based on silicon instead of carbon.
Women need not apply.
Well. I'd rather have everybody pay to support these worthless whores through taxation, than have one of them destroy my own life through child support payments.
Besides, MGTOW is easy if you have cash.
I predict the shaming to get louder and louder, as many of these women simply cannot find men who are willing to fuck them, let alone support them.
Ubermensch.
There's another reason not to become involved with the single mom. They usually get in that situation because they weren't realistic and tried to snare the alpha male who was out of their league and would never stay with them long term. A lot of times they don't really change. If you are the beta substitute, they'll always be slightly unhappy and unsatisfied that they weren't able to get the alpha they wanted. They won't appreciate and be happy with the guy they can actually get. Do you really want to be with a woman who is like that?
Blame radical feminism.
During the Enlightenment, northern Europe went from a Shame-based civilization to one based on Respect and Respectability ( the famous Protestant work ethic ).
Sexual culture, however, languished in the Shame era.
Once society was completely secularized, religious Shame no longer worked for setting rules in the sex marketplace.
What should have replaced it was a market based on Respect.
What we got, due to feminists mainstreaming male second class status, was that complete Law of the Jungle called Game. Instead of advancing civilization, radical feminists have paved the way for complete savagery in the sex marketplace.
"In truth, this should be insulting to most bachelors who kept their nose clean. It means you have some of these women doing the 80/20 thing, thinking only 20% of men are good looking enough to sleep with, while the remaining 80% of you schmoes are not worth it.... "
Again ... lack of respect.
And women wonder why they are being ridden hard and put away wet, and why the smart poindexters out there want nothing to do with them.
Women can end this at any time.
Respect yourself: improve your appearance and behavior.
Respect your potential mate: Don't insist that he be both the biker from hell and a good husband. That ain't going to happen. Concentrate on good husband first if you don't want to end up a single mother.
Give respect before you demand it yourself: End shit tests or shrewish crap. Behave respectably if you want respect.
Game does not have to happen. Game is a rational response to bad behavior by women. Women can end Game at any time.
If the ladies insist on acting like Jane of the Jungle, then they shouldn't be surprised if all they get is George of the Jungle.
As I've said, if my genes, talents, skills, beliefs, goals, etc aren't worth passing on to the next generation how can their mere by-product (the money I make and material things I can buy with it) be worth passing on to them?
So, 70.1 million men in the US are fathers...or are they men who THINK that they are fathers??
Take the Red Pill,
DUN DUN DUUUNNNNNN!!!!
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