Thursday, September 20, 2012

How to Snatch a Man

I know when men tender advice about "how to court guys" or "how to catch a man" or "what men like in women," the pre-programmed, visceral response from most modern day women is

"WHAT MAKES YOU THINK WE WANT A MAN OR NEED ONE???  I'M MY OWN WOMAN AND I HAVE A CAREER, AND YOU MUST BE SHALLOW AND LIKE SKINNY CHICKS, YOU PROBABLY DEGRADE WOMEN BY EXPECTING THEM TO DRESS UP IN LINGERIE, WELL, THAT'S NOT ME!!!  I'M AN INDEPENDENT blah blah blah blah."

Of course, that night you're at home crying because you can't find a man.

Well, I've always had a very simple theory.  So simple, it's complex.  So simple it has evaded people because it's been hiding right there out in the public.

Why not just act like a woman?

Dispense, if you will, with the latest in feminist theory or ideology you've been fed and just think about it for a second.

Men and women are not only different, they are kind of designed purposely to be different to umm..."do things" together.  They complement each other.  Whether this was "intelligent" design or evolution, more powerful forces than you and an army of women's studies professors are at work here and, frankly, can't be overridden.

So the obvious solution would be to simply be feminine.  Because, well, that's what men like.

No, no, I know, I know.

"Who cares what men like!? You don't need a man, and why is it all about what the man wants, and what gall do I have to suggest to you what to do and blabbity blah blah blah."

I'm sorry, my apologies for being so presumptive and misogynistic.

What time would you like me to drop off the Kleenexes later this evening when you're crying?

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

"They compliment each other."

Complement, surely?

Mayberry said...

You know, I saw a beautiful young woman the other day who was actually wearing a summer DRESS and nice sandals, and she stopped me in my tracks because it is such a rare sight. She is a WOMAN, unlike these shorts or blue jean and tennis shoe/flip flop t-shirt wearing girls. Sometimes they're hard to tell from a long haired man. I would love to be stopped in my tracks more than once a year...

Captain Capitalism said...

Ah, "complement." Got it.

We should also compliment each other.

BIG N said...

I want a real woman not a mannish one.

Myrmecodon said...

As in both politics and dancing, things go best when the men pull and the women spin.

Anonymous said...

A thing is not complemented by itself.

The masculine is drawn to the feminine.
The feminine is drawn to the masculine.

Anonymous said...

Poets and philosophers who are married men incur by that very fact the suspicion that they are looking to their own welfare, and not to the interests of science and art.

By Arthur Schopenhaur
The Art Of Controversy

Anonymous said...

They will learn eventually. Unfortunately, it will take a LONG time to reach equilibrium. Until then, these policies and institutions are accelerating their own bankrupcy:

http://fullcomment.nationalpost.com/2012/09/19/joe-oconnor-selfishness-behind-growing-trend-for-couples-to-not-have-children/

Anonymous said...

Write a book about it. It worked once for you. Funny how you can make money dispensing common sense.

Take The Red Pill said...

MGTOW happened when the bicycles finally realized that they really don't need fish, either.

Mr. H said...

To Anonymous 6:17pm, Masculinity and femininity do not attract each other nor complement each other. If you go to a website called "Femininebeauty.info" you will know biologically speaking opposites do not attract one another.