The "Leykis Clause" is in effect for this post. You have been warned. Complaints about the nature of this post will be ignored.
I checked in with Dr. Helen to see if her book is available yet.
It isn't, not till JUNE of 2013...curse you Dr. Helen.
Regardless, I came across this post about a guy who can get a girl on a handful of dates, even (if you'll pardon the phrase) "bed her," but inevitably they find something wrong with him and either never call back or break it off.
Helen charts this up to women having too high of expectations, and while I will agree with her that that can certainly be the case many times, I have a more blunt and probably more apt reason why -
you didn't rock her world in bed.
Yes, I know that is harsh, but we are men and this is the Manosphere, so let us not be fragile little princesses and shoot the messenger. Let us accept this as truth, and thus, in a very manly fashion, improve ourselves.
It certainly can be the case that you didn't meet all 327 requirements on her mandatory check list. I get that and wouldn't doubt that accounts for a majority of reason why women stop calling. But if everything is going "great" and all of the sudden she changes her mind, it leads me to believe there was something much more carnal, and thus, your failure of performance.
Now before you get too down on yourself, let us be honest and admit no guy is a rock star in bed 100% of the time. You're tired, you're not in the mood, you drank too much, you didn't drink enough, and sometimes the chemistry just isn't there. It could also be her - she had bad breath, she said something that just killed your excitement, her bra and bottom didn't match (all experienced by el Capitan) - and thus you were not Jeremy Irons in bed. But if it seems to be a recurring phenomenon then you need to improve your performance.
However, I do not mean that in a Viagra commercial sort of way. I mean that in you got to hit the gym and do laps and lift weights sort of way. You need to improve your physical appearance. Performance in bed is one thing, the tactics of which can range from imaging your grandpa playing basketball in black socks to thinking about what you have to do at work the next day. I'm assuming you have that covered. But the hard part (heh heh heh) is making yourself physically attractive to the point the girl is physically attracted to you enough you needn't have to perform so much in bed. Additionally, beyond physical improvement you can also increase your verbal game, letting your charm and charisma make things easier for you in bed. Focusing on these things (which you should be anyway) wins over the girl's mind where 90% of the battle occurs anyway (well, at least according to GI Joe it does, and knowing is half the battle).
Do not, however, at the same time just ASSUME you suck in bed. If there's any mistake men have made, it is erroneously blaming themselves. A 327 point check list is probably the reason she stopped calling. That being said, you should ensure that is the case by ensuring your performance is not in question.
10 comments:
I don't have a lot of experience with hooking up with men I am not seriously interested in, but in any of the cases where I disappear, it's usually due to the 327 thing checklist.
For example, one guy lied to me about being really good at soccer, I asked him to sub on my team for one game because we were short players, and he ended up playing horribly, like he'd never touched a soccer ball. I broke it off.
Another guy chewed with his mouth open at dinner. He was French, so I'm not sure if that's culturally-okay for them, but I thought it was gross. I stopped seeing him after that.
There's only one really embarrassing story that I can think of that fell under the umbrella of sex-related. But I'm definitely not going to discuss it here. It was mortifying and I never returned his calls again.
Could the Conservative Sociologist get some more women to comment on the Captain's observations? Does he know what he's talking about, or is he blowing smoke?
I would like to call to order a meeting to issue a correction to the fact that it is not in fact a checklist of 327 items of attraction to trigger.
The current list stands at 467.
The introduction of Twilight and Channing Tatum may have created additional items since then.
women are just naturally incapable of feeling pleasure, the planets have to align for her to cum (supposedly, only ~30% of all women have ever had an orgasm).
men need to stop caring about a woman's pleasure. let her figure it out, get what you want out of life.
Another problem caused by rampant sex outside of marriage. As a Christian, I couldn't really care...
The Captain got it right. Seduction doesn't stop when you got her undressed. The manosphere pays very little attention to what happens in bed. In fact I believe a lot of guys don't really care to "perform" - they are happy just because their laycount got +1.
Wake
And what if the problem is "in a Viagra sort of way"? Is there anything other than chemical supplements to help one overcome that kind of problem?
Wake is right. If you're just there to add a +1 to your lay count and you're boring or the sex is bad, not many women are going to give you another shot. Unless she really likes you. If not, you're going to permanently be stamped in her mind as "terrible in bed"
If it's your thing to move from woman to woman, I can see why you wouldn't care and that's fine.
For guys looking to keep a woman around, you should focus on making it a memorable experience.
This was the reverse of my problem. I was beastmode in bed.
My beta in regular life killed the attraction that led to bed, thus killing the golden goose before it could lay the egg.
The Conservative Sociologist.
For your average slut, sure, they have many dicks of experience to compete with and thus the checklist is higher whilst their ability to bond with any one man is diminished. Trying to please a whore is a Fool's Game.
The truth of the matter is that with time and effort both partners can learn and teach each other to give better sexual stimulation.
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