Dalrock does some outstanding economic research and pulls some earnings data for different groups of men/women and married/single.
The two trends that are apparent in his chartage is:
1. Single men are increasingly earning less
2. Married men are always making more
Why?
Because single men can and married men have to.
Single men are like the Priuses of the courting world. We can get by on very little fuel. We don't need a ton of money and with the varying economic, political, and socioloigical factors making hard work, production, and a career distasteful, if not outright impossible. Fire up the X-Box and get another bottle of scotch.
But the married men, my goodness, the solid, reliable stalwarts of the labor market. Hell or high water they will work their assess off and buck for that promotion.
Why?
Again, while there is certainly the factor they are being noble and providing for their children and families, I contend it's because they have to. They do not have the option to tell their manipulative, psychopath of a boss to shove it. They do not have the option to stand up for themselves and their self-respect. They have a mortgage, kids to feed, a wife to subsidize, a car payment, student loans (both the parents and the children) and credit cards. They are OWNED by the company via debts that aren't even theirs.
Again, I am not criticizing good fathers and husbands. Many of you who read this are out there and don't let your finances/wife/children get to the point you are living paycheck to paycheck and must suffer the sadism of employers. But for the remaining, I'd estimate, 80% of married men out there, I would love to say "Enjoy the Decline," but I can't because it's impossible for you to. Your life has been cast. And it is one of slavery.
20 comments:
Let's not forget that your average married American male is in a de-facto abusive relationship. Why?
Because his wife can have him arrested any time for anything, and thrown out of his house. She is his landlord, effectively.
Because his wife can take away what he loves the most in his life - his children - on a whim. She has more power than CPS, over him.
Because his wife can take away his savings and most of his future income, even if he never did anything wrong. She has more power than the IRS (alimony and child support liens come before tax liens), and gets a bigger cut than the IRS.
Because his wife can deny him sex, and he will face all of the above if he dares look at another women. She is effectively his gatekeeper to sex.
Because his wife can cheat on him, whenever and with whomever she likes, and he can do nothing about it. Society and family courts will support her all the way to the bank, if he dares question her.
The married man works hard, BECASE HE IS SCARED.
Yes. I often describe myself as a corporate wage slave. I also watch for other likely slaves. I am a manager. I need reliable employees. It sucks, but it is the only option for now.
THIS is one of your best articles to date?
Why?
Because my life for the past 9 years ?(not including last year) reflected this very scenario. I was overleveraged with a house, then got a car, was (and still am) married, have two boys and had some annoying credit card debt hanging around.
I was climbing the corporate ladder as fast and as high as I could, making deals and working tons of hours. I put on weight, was stressed out and generally ready to explode.
When you are in this box in your life, there are few choices. You must continue to run on the hamster wheel, generating income to pay for faceless, souless, lifeless bankers for a house you hate, for vehicles that still break down, and for a government who continually increases property taxes even though the IL housing market started tanking in 2008.
You soon realize that you are underwater on your house and on your cars. You realize that the corporate guys you work for are assholes who squeeze more blood from employees while denying bonuses and calling those employees divas for standing up for themselves. You then get a rash of shit from your wife that you work too much, you put on too many pounds and you are a grumpy, stressed out guy (i.e., "you have changed since taking that promotion").
You wake the fuck up and realize that you have been a SUCKER, a CHUMP and a SLAVE for your whole life and career, and you vow to never be there again.
Today, one year later: the house sold (for a loss - which is fine), credit card debt is almost paid off, renting a house in MN (IL can fuck itself), one kid is in the Army, wife is working full time, and I have a good job as a government employee.
I am enjoying the decline and helping to starve the beast, a couple of billion dollars at a time.
What can you say? Love is illogical. It's a limbic system thing, not a neocortex thing.
If you've read the "Sexual Paradox" you would know men are also finally waking up and are seeing that there's more to life than just being a proud "head of the house". As a woman, and a newly married wife, I would NEVER burden my husband with extra responsibility if I could work. Luckily, I have a pulse and am working and paying my fair share. We both earn basically 95K a year before bonuses, which isn't much for this area, but it gets us by and then some. I am also doing my best to go to the Farmer's Market, eat organic non-GMO food so that we don't drown in healthcare costs in the future and stay employable and cancer-free ;)
We are a team and we make decisions together. We already agreed that when we have kids I will work part-time and then work from home full-time so that I'm available for the kids as often as possible. I would do anything for my husband and would never be a BURDEN on him. Some women are certainly burdens.. but they cook and clean and their husbands come home to a nice home cooked meal every night. It's a trade-off..
Marriage has ALWAYS been for the betterment of women and children. There was never a time when it was a beneficial situation for men. It used to be understood that married men were getting a cruddy deal. Steps were taken to make it more palatable, and to ensure husbands/fathers were respected.
Now, it's a cruddy deal for which there is no reward whatsoever. Don't get married, ever.
@Green Steelhead:
If you are a government employee, you aren't starving the beast. You are a part of the beast...
I can't argue with the facts presented because they are true, but I am happily married have an 8 yo boy and a 10 yo boy, work like a dog but i have never been happier.
One thing that helps is to live within your means. It helps that my wife is "low maintenance" and I make decent money, didn't get married (this time) till I was 40.
It is important to live within your means. I know people who I work with who have huge houses an fancy cars and are one pay check away from bankruptcy. That puts great stress on you an your family. I have a very modest house and a old car, no debts (house bought 8 years ago will be paid for in another 2). With the wisdom of age and the comfort of a little bit of financial security I can tell you that "stuff" does not make you happy. If you don't kill yourself to acquire stuff you don't need you can soon accumulate enough wealth that you can have anything you need without too much stress.
i'M RECENTLY MARRIED AND HAVE A SMALL CHILD, i CAN TOTALY SEE THSI oops caps lock on, I can totally see this dynamic at work. I used to cruise by on almost no income, I could take months or even years off if I wanted to. Then as soon as I got married BAM!, never enough cash. Between the cocksucking taxman and the rent in this city, plus all the new stuff I have to get, insurance etc, it's crazy. Still I see it as a challenge, to beat the wage-slave conundrum and establish revenue streams based of value created, not hours served. I wouldn't go back to being single. I love my wife and little boy. But I do work all the time now, and focus on money allot more.
Anonymous:
"Because his wife can have him arrested any time for anything, and thrown out of his house. She is his landlord, effectively.
Because his wife can take away what he loves the most in his life - his children - on a whim. She has more power than CPS, over him.
Because his wife can take away his savings and most of his future income, even if he never did anything wrong. She has more power than the IRS (alimony and child support liens come before tax liens), and gets a bigger cut than the IRS.
Because his wife can deny him sex, and he will face all of the above if he dares look at another women. She is effectively his gatekeeper to sex.
Because his wife can cheat on him, whenever and with whomever she likes, and he can do nothing about it. Society and family courts will support her all the way to the bank, if he dares question her."
The above sounds like the perfect argument (and has all of the right reasons) that a guy should avoid womyn, stay single, and GHOW.
As a man married for over twenty years I can tell you that you are right on the money. But it is not just corporate wage slaves. Married men who are small business owners are wage slaves to the government. Advice to young men from the voice of experience: do not get married.
You are correct that I cannot enjoy the decline personally but I am somewhat enjoying seeing socialism and liberal fantasy being exposed for the fraud it is. It's just taking too damn long.
If collapse is the only way for things for reality once again to take hold I'd like to get it done and over with asap.
http://www.perrymarshall.com/adwords/renaissance/gotoguy2/
Most married men I know live in a state of "voluntary domestic incarceration"..
-Survivorman
It's about the same for us divorced guys with kids, kicked out because we didn't make enough money and complained when she spent more time out partying than at home. I have 3 kids, and just had to take on 1/3-1/2 extra job responsibilities for 1/6 more pay. Almost $20K in debt for the lawyer, but at least I won 50/50 joint custody. But at least I'm a slave for my kids now, not the ex.
Technically, it's Indentured Servitude, for most of us. We do receive benefits, at some level, in terms of fulfilling the genetic imperative.
I knew a single guy who only worked 6 months a year. That was how long he needed to work to pay his bills. Then he would quit his job and play games all day until the money ran out and get his old job back.
You can't do that as a married man. You need to have someplace to go just to get away from her.
Marriage works fine when there's no children to support. Less relationship and financial stress as a result. The hard part is finding a woman who is okay with NOT having kids because you don't want them. If you're lucky enough to pull this off cherish her in return for her sacrifice and things will be good. I speak from experience. Married with kids ended in divorce. Second marriage without kids and still together 21 years later.
What I find amazing is how Christians and other social conservatives have the gall to claim that higher pay is a benefit of marriage, as if putting a ring on a woman's finger magically catapults you into some higher pay bracket.
Isn't it true that beta males go well with Alpha females? (And visa versa.) Thus, know yourself and match accordingly.
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