Touche witty friends of Cappy, touche.
However, a slight spin on that question has a lesson for all of us and one I'd like to share:
"What would you do if you realized your dreams?"
Very rarely do people realize their dreams. And the reason is simple - society is predisposed to ensure you don't.
I don't mean this in a "conspiratorial" sense, that there is some sentient, organized effort to prevent you from realizing your dreams, but that society is structured and organized to take advantage, live off of, and parasite off of its precious youth.
Chances are if you were born after 1960 your parents wanted you because THEY wanted a child. Whether they could AFFORD children, whether they SHOULD have children, and whether they had the adult capacity to raise children be damned. They wanted a child like a soccer mom wants an SUV. And thus your upbringing was already impaired from the get go because you were an "object" or a "thing" in the eyes of your parents, not another human being.
After that you were pretty much a pawn for the state via the state education system. Your parents, too "busy" to rear you yourself, were thankful that at the age of 5 you could
Global warming
Ozone Layer
Recycle
Give money to poor disadvantaged people in third world countries
You're privileged
Vote democrat
Go to college at all costs
and other things that were neither educational, nor helpful.
You then went to college, because you were told to, incurred a ton of debt, and then started a career where at any moment you could be fired for the most made-up-of reasons and were strongly encouraged to donate money to your 401k plan, which would be confiscated or haircuted anyway.
In short, your dreams of what you wanted to do as a child never really stood much of a chance. Because from the day you were conceived (not born) society already had your time booked to be slaved away to serve it and not you. Those dreams were merely a fake incentive to get you to work for them. And, for most people, they succumbed to the matrix, they obeyed, they "did what they were told" and now are suffering a mortgage they can't afford, persistent student loans, a spouse that hates them, children they really shouldn't have had, a car payment, parents who refused to sock away for retirement, and a boss that owns them because they are by-proxy-enslaved via debt.
But then there are the "others."
"Others?" You ask.
Yes, "the others."
The men and women who got sent to the principle's office often. The boys and girls who could stump their teacher in the 3rd grade with...well...3rd grade logic. The young 20 somethings who knew something was wrong, couldn't put their finger on it, but via the internet, compared notes, removed the wool from their eyes and realized just what a scam society had in store for them.
We call these people "independent minded."
Most of us fall into this category. We didn't fit in, we refused to obey, and we knew something was amiss, but society kept on telling us we were flawed, erroneous and just plain wrong. Our audacity and personalities would not accept it and we stuck to our guns. We decided we didn't have to obey what society told us. We decided we were going to get a bang for our finite live's buck. We were going to drive our lives to the limit and do what we god damned pleased with it - consequences and society's desires be damned.
And thus you have a new breed of westerners and independent thinkers. Young men (and women) who refused to go with the matrix and are truly independent people.
There are of course, benefits.
We don't fall for the college/education scam. We do not waste our best years laboring away for an opportunistic employer. We don't have enough assets to be confiscated in a 401k or IRA. We don't have debts we can't afford. We don't have kids we can't afford. And by merely identifying and side-stepping the slave-trap society had laid out for us, we're living lives that are arguably the freest in human history.
I just went to Alaska and back on a motorcycle at a whim. Danny is going to live in a trailer in Louisiana, spending time with his nephew, and retire at 40. Matt hitch hiked across America. Roosh is gallivanting around the globe chasing girls and getting paid for it. Davis and Silvio wrote two great books. And scores of you are starting your own business or going on your own adventure. We could go on, but in general, adherents of this new independent line of thinking are capitalizing on the one finite lives they've been given and are thusly living better lives the the average sheeple.
Just one problem.
When I say we are living lives that are arguably the freest in human history, I'm not joking. We really are. But who else has gone down this path? Who else have lived such free lives? Has anyone gone down this rabbit hole before? Has any one tread this path in the past?
While there certainly have been independent minded people in the past, they are so rare and so uncommon their experiences are either unavailable for public consumption or have been lost to history. Their philosophies, observations and epiphanies were considered "obscure" or "outliers" and thus never made it into the realm of "common sense" or "general wisdom." And with this lost, or perhaps, never recorded knowledge, we are going into uncharted territory. And as with every trip into the unknown there are always unforeseen costs, consequences and drawbacks.
It is here a sad irony unfolds.
To the outside observer, stuck at their wage slave job, and boring mundane lives, all the see is the positives. Gallivanting around the world, climbing mountains, leaving at a whim, never worrying about money, answering to no one. Their entire lives they have been told (and truthfully so) that this is the "dream" and when you achieve it all will be well. There will be no more problems and you will be happy. But what they don't see is the unforeseen costs and consequences to "living the dream" and living such independent lives. Costs and consequences that are all too real and hidden/overshadowed by the blinding benefits.
First is the issue of peerlessness. I say this not to brag, and I need you to understand that. I am NOT bragging. I am telling you the truth to make a point and to help you in the future. But this past summer I took two vacations. The first one was 2 weeks in the Black Hills and Badlands of South Dakota with my motorcycle. I drove all over the place, hiked all over the place, smoked cigars and gambled in Deadwood. I experienced something most motorcyclists across the world can only dream of experiencing. The second one trumped even that. I drove to Alaska and back. I saw mountains that put the Black Hills to shame and am one of the very few to claim they drove to Alaska on a bike.
I was miserable about half the time on both trips.
Why?
Because after you gun through the Needles Highway on a crotch rocket or make it to Hyder, Alaska or summit Harney Peak or hike in Banff, and the adrenaline wears off, you are once again alone because nobody can just take 4 weeks off on a whim. There is nobody to share the experience with, not because you don't have friends, but because you are so far to the right of the mean nobody can keep up. Either because they don't have the money, they don't have the time, they don't have the physique, or (more commonly) they don't have the interest.
Roosh is another example. You may disagree with his life choice, but again, to the outside 20 something male observer, Roosh is living the dream. He flies around the world, makes money on writing books about how to seduce women in different countries, and that's his job. But at the end of the day, how many people can Roosh associate with? Who can he compare notes with? Not only is he peerless in that nobody else in the world is doing what he does, but in traveling so extensively, he rarely is in a country where people speak English, pushing him further to the right of the bell curve into further isolation. It isn't until he returns home does he have his peer group surrounding him again.
Whatever it is and whatever your dream may be, realize if you realize it, it will be YOUR dream. And in it being "your dream" it will be so specific and unique to you that by default you will not have any peers.
Second is decreasing novelty.
Imagine if your palate would became inured to new foods the moment you tasted it. You would have to keep pushing the edge getting newer, spicier, and more obscure foods. You'd try one food, and then would become bored with it, forcing you on this spiral to constantly be trying to find new foods. Yes you could eat to merely survive, but you will never experience that "first taste" ever again until you find something bigger, better, and newer.
Your brain is the same way.
Once you achieve your dream, you will become inured to it. My childhood dream was to climb mountains. My first real mountain was Flinch Peak in Glacier National Park. It was amazing. Then I did Hallet's Peak, Laramie Peak, Deseret Peak, Lake Angeline, and more and more and more until one day, half way up a new mountain, I couldn't go on. Not out of physical weakness, but no desire. It would be just another peak. I would be up there by myself. The view could have very well been as spectacular as when I first summited Flinch Peak, but it would be nowhere near as impressive. It would just be more rocks, dirt and snow.
In short, because society enslaves you and prevents you from ever realizing your dreams, you think when you inevitably realize them you will be engaged and stimulated for the rest of your life.
The truth is you will tire of it in about 2-3 years and need to find a new source of inspiration. You will also wonder if the new "dream" will be the same, and you will then finally realize there is no "final solution" to happiness. Like a shark, you will need to keep swimming, keep going, keep trying or else you will become inured to life.
Now, I paint a very dark and depressing picture. And I know, I know, crocodile tears and world's smallest violin.
Would I EVER want to go back to a bank or a corporate gig? Would I or any of the other independent minded types who are pushing the frontiers of independence EVER go back to regular lives?
Absolutely not. We KNOW and APPRECIATE what we have.
But the reason I bring these drawbacks up is not to complain but to warn those of you who are on the path to achieving and realizing your own dreams in your own lives. And that is a higher percentage of you than most of you realize.
Understand this current "generation" of "others" or "independent minded types" had to start from scratch to get where we are. There was no advice, there was no wisdom, there was no internet. We had to wake ourselves up, take our own red pill, with many of us not waking up until our 30's, 40's or 50's. But with the internet and the plethora of websites out there speaking these derived truths and provide such advice, the "next generation" will be able to benefit from our experiences. And the whole concept of wisdom is to help the younger generations by passing on our knowledge so that you may have BETTER lives than us.
This means many of you will be reaching your goals and realizing your dreams ever earlier on than we did. And while you may think this is great (and it certainly is) us "elders" or "older brother types" who are down the path further than you, would do you no service in not warning you about the drawbacks that await.
So in short, consider multiple dreams and goals you wish to achieve because if you take our advice you will have enough time in life to realize more than one. And you're going to need them to maintain your sanity and intellect. Also I strongly recommend appreciating your fellow human being and developing an interest in intellectual thought and good conversation with your fellow man. I delve into more detail here, but it is not through peaks of mountains, riches, or a high notch count that happiness lies. It is your fellow man. Finally, do not be so stupid as to shoot yourself in the foot by making foolish mistakes. i.e.-getting somebody/yourself pregnant, majoring in a stupid subject, going into debt for material things, etc. None of your dreams can be accomplished if you've crippled yourself with stupidity.
14 comments:
Roosh does come across, especially lately, as a bit jaded and lonely. But he's living his dream, and that there is a bit of a dark side to getting what you want is just part of the picture. It's a price I'll gladly pay.
Non Serviam!
That one is a bitter/sweet post for me. Were I more intelligent and artful with words, Cap - I could have written the stuff you write - 15 years ago!
I'm a little older than you Cap and I am pleased as punch that you are throwing this stuff out for the younger guys to chew on. As your respected elder - (stop that laughing, damn you) - all of this takes me back to better times when I was younger too.
As I start my 50th trip around the sun I look back and think I should be an action figure. I have a trophy room that has some fine animals taken on great hunts. I crashed twice in aircraft and walked away with out a scratch. I don't know how many nights I slept under the stars or drank whisky right from the bottle around a campfire.
Ya know what I want now, Cap?
Contentment.
I come home from a good job and walk my hoople head dogs. After that we go into the back yard where I have built my man-space. I burn meat and veggies on the grill.
Afterward its yardwork, followed by a doze on the hammock. Then in for bed. I do that 5 times a week, the house is paid off, the truck is paid off in one week - I have stores and supplies for emergency preperations - the world can go fuck its collective hat with my compliments! I'm shooting skeet this weekend to sharpen up for the pheasants and grouse this year.
I didn't spend as much time on the bike as I wanted, or take off weeks at a time. I worked a lot of shitty jobs with horrible people to get here. But my modest house is MINE. My kingdom is small, but it is rewarding.
I think you should be telling your readers to play for the long game, Cap. Yes, there is a time and place to light the afterburners on the bike and head for the hills, but you need to plan for the days when you won't be able to do that anymore. Doing that is very difficult these days...but one day, you and the boys will be sitting right where I am right now and if you are not prepared for that, life is going to be very difficult.
Just my two cents, but I think you need to look further ahead.
Uncle Remus observed, "You can't run from trouble - there ain't no place that far!" Always gonna be problems, it's true. But if you've chosen the set of problems you face, it's a lot better than getting whatever ones come by dumped on you.
That said, I'm actually not too worried about my dreams coming true and becoming bored with it. See, the freedom I'm trying to engineer, the dream so many wish for (without working for, oddly enough) is no more than the thing that will allow me my real dreams. I can make music forever, both writing and performing, without boredom, and when you add my passion for photography, travel, and various historical things, boredom is not even a problem to contemplate.
Loneliness, though... Yeah. I'm a bit worried about that. The peerlessness thing is a hard one, as there are only so many free souls who share my interests. No idea how to get on top of that. But damned if it isn't a better trouble than this fucking commute I have now.
Amen to that Peregrine.
And Glen, I am leanring to enjoy just sitting out back and grilling and smoking. Takes some doing. but it's enjoyable.
And therein we see how Western independent men will go extinct, by choosing to go childless and have adventures, killing off the very genes that led to that independent spirit. Unfortunately, reproduction is a necessity for Western civilization to endure. It can't be transmitted through teaching morons to raise their IQ (IQ is mostly inherited). It has to be transmitted genetically. How about become sperm donors at least? Have your cake (adventures) and eat it too (children... again, since IQ is genetic, the kid will turn out fine regardless of their situation).
I wish I could spend more time commenting on this. Just pulled this up, but heading out on a long motorcycle trip today so I've got to leave. This is important. I'm closing in on 60, and have done the things Glenn speaks and then some. Racing cars, climbing big peaks (tech type climbing) flying planes (made my money doing that) , sailing boats, and enjoying some beautiful women around the world (Latin women are to be experienced). Don't work too hard, and for god sakes don't work for a f...ing big corporation in a cubical. Live a simple life with little to zero debt, and spend your time doing YOUR thing. I have watched many men die from crashes to slow disease deaths and the future is never guaranteed. Living a life with a goal of having a few things and some cash (losing value by the day) will only guarantee you miss out on what this one life holds for you. It's funny, the less you focus on money and security, the more good things seem to fall your way. Stay in decent shape, spend as much time doing your thing and don't look to your later years as sitting around the fire thinking what a wonderful life you've lived. Keep going, there is so much out there if you have the time to do it. Time is your only measure of wealth.
I must say, this was quite a compassionate and honest acknowledgment of your reality. This is the paradox of life and happiness being that it's lonely at the top and the higher you go, the faster you run back down to get more people to join you. Being happy not only lies in being able to pursue hobbies on a whim but also in helping others (as you're also doing).
Going into debt for material things is the dumbest thing anyone can do. I certainly don't care for a new car or even a house. I have looked into cohousing but there doesn't seem to be any viable opportunities as of yet.
I WILL get pregnant in a few months and have children.. but only because I want to and am VERY happily married to a man who is more ready than ever to be a father. I made him wait long enough (he's 32 and I will be 34 soon!) We're not being foolish about it though as we are not in debt and are willing to make the necessary sacrifices. Also, hubby isn't outdoorsy so riding motorcycles and climbing mountains genuinely doesn't appeal to him. He's a video game designer and is excited to get to work every morning. Imagine that! Someone who loves their 9-5 job! Lucky guy I know. I, on the other hand, feel like a slave to the system and am working on creating my own business that will allow for more freedom and flexibility. I know it will be lonely but with the extra time that I'll have I'll go out and make GENINUE friendships based on shared interests instead of forced proximity.
I've watched almost all your videos and while I take them with a grain of salt, they are definitely adding a new perspective to my life that I will keep in mind. Can't wait to have my love child and be a parent though!! =)
Glad to see that with all of your well-justified enthusiasm for banking great experiences, you are also mixing in a dollop of purpose and helpfulness to give your life meaning. I am going to be 64 next week and haven't had the exciting life you are living. But eight years ago I had a cancer diagnosis and realized how meaningless my life had been. I set out to change that and now feel that, if my cancer returns - it is now in remission - I can pass on satisfied that I helped people and did the best I could for my family.
I retired at 47, did next to nothing for quite a while (mostly reading), recovering from corporate burnout. I'm about to turn 57, and I'm looking to get the certifications that will get me contracts as a network security specialist. My previous 30 years of work experience was primarily software design/programming - everything from imbedded systems, OS, to financial, mostly massively multiplayer game server design.
I've saddled myself with most of the material baggage you'd expect from someone my age, but it's paid for baggage, and I'm making plans to get rid of as much of it as I can. The hard part will be the house - bad market here.
I took 3 months to travel though 31 states on my motorcycle, doing photography, going to a friends wedding, and just hanging out with friends. I've sailed around the Greek Islands. I've driven the west coast in a Porsche Boxster almost Dozen times. I've helped build houses for friends. Sampled 54 different single malt scotches - in Scotland.
Most of that I did by myself. The parts that I remember most fondly were time spent with other people. Oh, and the occasional adrenalin hit.
Chances are, if your dream doesn't include time with friends and interacting with people, you'll get tired of it pretty fast. If your dream is to Solo around the world in a 24' sail boat - that's great, but you should start working on a dream that includes friends. I know the Captain as said it before a number of times, and it's 100% true - time with friends doing something you enjoy no matter how mundane that might be is a dream you won't get tired of.
I echo your thoughts, Cap. I work pretty hard because I am getting out of debt, putting together the home base. I take two to four weeks off during the summer to ride, but I'm finding it's not as interesting as I had hoped because I'm having to do it myself. A couple years I've cut short because I got tired of riding alone. My friends all have jobs that don't allow them to just take off and I have no significant other at this point. I've come to the realization that sharing your experiences is a necessary part of the experience.
Cap, your mistake was not focusing on finding yourself the wife. Not a wife, the wife, a soulmate with whom you would die in one day, holding hands. You already understand better than most the value of having people in your life. However, all you really need is one person to be packed for life, as long as it's the right person.
Here's my story: I'm from eastern european country, things are a bit different there, obviously, but rat race, lies society tells you and red pill - those are generally the same. I was in severe depression from 14 to 19, feeling I wasn't suited for the world around me (because the world around me was degenerates of Atlas Shrugged villain type, but I didn't know back then), including being a total shut-in for a 6 months after I dropped from college and disavowed my brain-dead family. Things weren't looking so bright for me, but I decided to try and find some reason to live (as in "reason to not lie down and wait when dehydratation kills you" reason). I find my soulmate. And if I was able to do it after literally not seeing another human being for 6 months, than no excuse can be justified for others.
Cut to the present - I'm 24 y. o. stay-at-home husband, all the time in the universe belongs to me, and my only occupation is enjoying life my own way - read, watch and learn, consume knowledge and entertainment (don't have any tornadoes to chase here). I did my best to rebuilt a social circle, but than abandoned it because no one among my acquaintances could keep up with my pace of intellectual growth (guess, it's a downside of making self-education your raison d'etre). Once again, I live as recluse, only now I'm happy, because having just one person you can share your life with makes all the difference in the world.
Cap, your mistake was not focusing on finding yourself the wife. Not a wife, the wife, a soulmate with whom you would die in one day, holding hands
You apparently haven't been on this site long, or you'd have read his very detailed chronicles of his dating life when he was younger.
As for not having peers, I can relate to that wholeheartedly. While I was never close to my father, because he was an abusive bastard, I did learn from some of his mistakes. A big one was holding off on things you want to do because you'll do them 'after you retire'. When he got liver cancer, he finally went up to Alaska for a couple weeks on a cruise, because he'd wanted to do that for THIRTY YEARS. At that point, I realized that if you believe you want to do something, you need to make plans to do that THIS YEAR. If you aren't motivated enough to make it happen in the next 12 months, it's not really that important to you.
I had just finished putting myself through college when he finally died from that (STEM degree). But the first thing I did after starting work was buy a motorcycle, and then rode it from Virginia to Seattle the following year. Since then, I've ridden through 3/4 of the states in the US, and 1/3 of the Canadian provinces as well.
More recently, I started shooting competetively, and I'm already shooting in National level matches and have a sponsor.
But with any of the things I do, I really don't have anyone to talk with about them. Everyone around seems content to just go to work, go out for a drink after, and then go home to watch tv.....day after day after day. So the things I enjoy are just alien concepts to them, and any attempt to talk some of them into trying some of these things with me just come across as bragging instead.
Thank you for this post. It was very clear-eyed but I found it on the whole more encouraging than bleak. It mirrors the more trying aspects of my everyday life. It is good to acknowledge, rather than deny, the relentless effort and strength of conviction it takes to forge a solitary path. The funny thing for me is that an independently carved out existence seems the height of childishness to many people, but when such a life is lived with courage and responsibility, it amounts to being the ultimate adult. No mommy or daddy to tell you what to do or hand out gold stars.
Also, whether or not one is lucky enough to have close peers to share experiences with - or at least compare notes with - the very fact that the initiative to shape one's experience comes from within means that it is a deeply solitary path.
I've been recently reading books about Charles de Gaulle. When he was at the height of his fame, one of his aides asked him: what about happiness? He just snorted - "happiness, what is happiness!". There is a fascinating mixture of relentless energy and obstinacy, of weariness and disillusionment. I think that in some ways, the life of a relatively isolated individual leading his own life according to his own goals and values is like the life of a leader of men. The buck stops with you - you recognize that you are ultimately responsible for your own experience. You might not be responsible for others but you truly, lucidly, take responsibility for yourself. How rare is that?
Post a Comment