Thursday, December 05, 2013
Today's Office Brought to You in Part By
"Go Fuck Yourself" - Are you a boss that lied about the job duties to get a younger employee to agree to take the job? Then go fuck yourself. It's the least you can do for your lies and deceit.
"Have a Cup of Shut the Fuck Up" - Not going to offer a wage that is commensurate for the work you're asking people to do? Then try "Have a Cup of Shut the Fuck Up." It takes the bullshit out of middle management and middle aged bosses.
"Take This Job and Shove It" - No, we're not working in a basement because you planned so poorly you failed to rent enough office space with windows. "Take this Job and Shove It" - now available from kids working to pay your social security.
"Do It Yourself" - Too lazy to train staff? Tell them it's a steep learning curve because you don't want to do it? Then "Do It Yourself." If you're not going to train somebody, then why hire them? "Do It Yourself" - just pray it isn't Excel.
And finally by
"You Lost" - Thought kissing ass and brownosing your way to the top would guarantee a successful career? Uh oh! You lost! Apparently doing your own thing is more profitable, enjoyable and easy. Why kiss ass and work at a job you hate for 40 years when you can live on the cheap and answer to no one...Oops! I guess it's too late for you. "You Lost" - when you realize you lost at the game of life.