Saturday, February 23, 2013

The Epitome of Intellectual Honesty

My mom does not like it when I slam on baby boomers.  She somehow thinks when I say, "baby boomers" I mean "all of them" which I don't, but again, the Leykis Clause is in effect.

However, I received hope that she is starting to discern between generalizations and specific individuals when she sent me this.

You see, the reason some of you love me, and others hate me, is because I speak my mind based on the observations I see.  I don't care whose feelings it hurts because I've suffered enough idiocy and demand to point out the purveyors of that idiocy.  One special group of people who purvey an inordinate amount of idiocy upon me and the rest of society are aging baby boomers who decide on a whim to "live their dream," and run off to buy and ride brand new, over-priced, and over-powered motorcycles with absolutely no experience.  They endanger not just me and nearly everybody else on the road, but their novice selves.

Now, it doesn't matter if you like my attitude.  It doesn't matter if you think I'm cocky.  Your driving habits were so spectacularly shitty in:

Sturgis '10
Sturgis '11
Sturgis '12
Beartooth '12
and all points inbetween for all years

that I'm strongly recommending all you novice aging boomers who think it's a "cool idea" to get a Spider, a trike, or (heaven forbid) a real motorcycle and clog up all the motorcycle rallies while you 'n "ma" ride with matching helmets, give up that idea and just leave it to the professionals.

Or

ORRRRR!!!

here's another "crazy" idea-

maybe you learn to ride first before you drive (not haul) your pristine, brand new Harley's to the various motorcycle rallies thus not becoming another statistic.

Sorry to deliver real world and bad news to you.  But, then again, I'm not your parents who told you, you could do no wrong.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

You forgot to mention that the boomers don't dance the Schottische as well as you, or the Polka either probably.

James Wolfr said...

I'm sorry but the font on that site was too small, I'm old and can't see too good without ma glasses. Now where did I put the keys to my hog? Honey! Put your teeth in we're goin for a ride!

Anonymous said...

The only thing I would add to this post is "Here endeth the lesson. Amen."

Flynn Nellis said...

I though all you Blazers were for states rights. California says for profit businesses cannot discreminate their hiring/firing practices on the basis of religion. States Rights!

Anonymous said...

My twenty something self rode motor bikes. My almost 50 something self wouldn't dream of it. Some of the problem is probably older people getting into riding for the first time, but I suspect a lot of it is also people who have lots of experience riding, having accidents and hurting themselves in the process. The old me isn't anywhere near as bouncy as the younger me.

Glen Filthie said...

"You forgot to mention that the boomers don't dance the Schottische as well as you, or the Polka either probably.."
--------

Yep. I like you, Cap...but a sanctimonious lecture from a guy that rides a girl's bike and goes to something like Sturgis...?

It's kinda lame...

Rumbear said...

Other studies show that if the sequester goes through we will have 17% less old people to buy motorcycles. So what was your point?

Anonymous said...

Harley? It's a girly bike - poorly designed and built, heavier than a Wal-Mart butt and twice as ugly.

I'm a 60 yr old boomer and I ride a Ducati superbike (when it's not in the shop), I have been riding since my 14th birthday and there are idiots of all ages. Young men trying to kill themselves and all bystanders with their superbikes are just as idiotic as grampy and granny on the wobbling Harley.

Anonymous said...

Brazil is doomed!

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2283660/Plus-sized-models-storm-runway-display-curves-evening-wear-bridal-gowns-swimwear-lingerie-Brazils-Fashion-Weekend.html

Mike said...

If they get a licence, they can drive. If they pay, they can join a rally or whatever. Don't like it? Start yer own rally then.

MarkyMark said...

I could NEVER understand why folks would get a big bike as a beginner-never! Folks will get their license, then get an 883 Sportster, a 600cc sportbike, etc.; they won't get a proper 'learner' bike.

I took my MSF class on a Suzuki 250, then started riding an old Yamaha XS400. After cutting my teeth on that, I got a 750. THAT'S how you do it; you start small, build experience, then move up.

heresolong said...

The authors of the article completely missed the only point that matters. Older people are buying bikes for the first time in forty years, they don't know how to ride anymore, and they crash. Nothing to do with slower reaction times, age, the weight of the bike, or anything else. Of the numerous people I know who are older and have been riding for years, only one of them has had an accident (me ;-) and it was due to a lack of paying attention, not any other factor.

Oh, and Ducati guy, love your bike but when was the last time you rode 7,000 miles on it in one trip? Different bikes for different purposes.

Laughingdog said...

Hell with Sturgis. I wish they'd stay the hell away from Deal's Gap until they have at least a few thousand miles under their belt.

The saddest thing when you're riding there is that the worst riders are not only riding Gold Wings and huge Harleys, but they're the only ones too self-centered to move over and let the experienced riders get past them.

Seriously, just stay away from other bikers until you've gotten through and Experienced Rider Course.