Thursday, June 12, 2014

Smart People Outsource

"Outsourcing" is a funny thing.

Business experts applaud it.
Democrats love screwing over their union base by destroying jobs for it.
And every American loves nothing more than forcing Asians to slave away to make their latest Apple product for it.

But you know where the REAL cutting edge of outsourcing is?

Outsourcing your worthless prerequisite classes forced on you by the Big Education Industrial Complex.

Do you REALLY need to take 10 courses in

common sense
and other leftist claptrap bullshit?

no you don't.

But your higher education indoctrinators demand you do so they can employ further worthless scum such as themselves and enrich themselves in the process.

Why don't you fight back with a tool they themselves use?

OUTSOURCE your worthless hoop jumping classes to Academic Composition.

Academic Composition will write the pointless, purposeless papers you don't want to, let alone have the time to in order to prove to those souless corporations that you're worth hiring.  Besides, corporations believe outsourcing is a GREAT strategy and would be hypocritical if they dared to judge against a person employing their own tactics.  So the solution is obvious. 

They want to make you jump like a well-trained puppy dog to get an MBA.

You have self-respect.

So why don't you employ the services of Academic Composition to throw it right back in their hypocritical faces and "outsource" your pointless, meaningless, commie-socialist-professor-enriching make work so that you can get your MBA and ultimately get on with your life?

Society, boomers, academia, corporate America and every other institution is aiming to fuck you over,

why not fuck them back?

Hire the services of Academic Composition and play their equally foul game.  It's the least you can do to play their own game.

(PS - Academic Composition is looking to hire!  Do you have that worthless masters degree that your indoctrinators told you would be the salvation and your gateway to freedom and happiness?  But instead is an albatross of student debt? Well, fuck the system back and help write papers for other students!  make money AND screw back the system that screwed you over!)


Jeremy said...

I had seen these services crop up slowly over the past 10 years. My first thought was that they were a disgusting industry, helping students avoid work.

However, when the Cappy points out all the stupid, useless, PC-indoctrination courses that are forced on the underclassmen.... well, that sounds like a fantastic idea frankly.

Southern Man said...

I thought from the title that this would be about smart people outsourcing necessary tasks because it was... smart (the way I outsource, say, getting my ten acres mowed by a professional with a real brushhog and tractor, or fixing my dinner and drinks), not about students in worthless programs outsourcing their worthless writing assignments.

I teach STEM. Anything I assign is designed to be worth doing, and worth doing well. If you're doing worthless writing in a worthless program, spending additional resources to get it done for you is just stupid.It will also make you fail - if I catch a student outsourcing their programming assignments, I fail them because they're not learning the skill they signed up to learn and are paying me to teach them. If you find yourself using a writing service you should either switch to a worthwhile program (and do the work yourself) or quit.

That said, I code for hire. If the client happens to be a student, that's their lookout. But they never are; students can't afford me.

Also, the link doesn't work. Perhaps you should outsource some editing?

leeholsen said...

i'm looking to be an outsourcer myself. i finally figured out that outsourcing is what the world does continually to lower its costs.unfortunately, the usa and west in general probably gave up a couple hundred years of continued dominance by outsourcing everything it could as fast as possible to save a buck, but i imagine the romans did the same. i figure if i can outsource others to pay enough of my expenses, i can live the kind of life the capt lives !

liberranter said...

Cappy, I would almost be willing to pay for the joy of being able to write jargon-laden bullshit treatises like these, knowing that some oxygen-thieving fucktard with a worthless PhD might look at it as some sort of academic groundbreaker. I enjoy exercising the creative "poison pen" (I actually did this at work once, in the form of a "white paper," that actually earned PRAISE from our brainless idiot of a CEO), and would love challenge of doing it as a form of "academic sabotage."

kurt9 said...

I think this is legitimate. The content of the course work that is being "outsourced" here is nothing that one would ever use in any real job or career. In other words, it is worthless crap, and the best way to deal with such worthless crap is to simply hire someone else to deal with it based on boilerplates.