Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Will You Women PLEASE Explain This to Me?

Doesn't matter if she's short or tall.

Old or young.

Blond or brunette.

Can somebody out there please tell me why it takes women longer to get out of the car than men?

Every time, no matter who it is, I park the car, turn off the ignition, open the door, step out, close the door and by the time I accomplish all these tasks the girl is still in the passenger seat, dilly dallying about.

And so I wait, patiently, for the girl to finally open her door and get out. And it's not that they're putting on make up or powdering their nose in the mirror or gathering their things, they're just sitting in the car. Nor is it them waiting for me in some bygone era day of chivalry to walk around and open the door for them. They're just sitting in the car.

I have things to do, places to conquer, items to buy and heaven forbid I have to go to the bathroom, because I have to wait for a solid 5 Mississippi count before they're out and ready to go.

Theories? Hypotheses? Anyone?

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

They're seeing if you are a gentleman and will open the door for them.

Kasia said...

A couple of thoughts occur to me.

1) Is she wearing a skirt and/or heels? It takes a little more thought to get out gracefully in those.

2) Perhaps she is running her mental "do-I-have-everything" checklist?

3) You look less than dignified when you launch yourself out of the car, and she's trying to avoid a similar error.

Anonymous said...

Dear Captain, I think she is waiting for you to be a gentleman.... No doubt she denies it but while you stand their looking like a boob waiting for her to get out... you could be speeding up the exiting process by opening the door... Duh

Anonymous said...

they're probably waiting on you to open their door like a gentleman.

Ranty said...

Gathering the purse/accoutrements?

Clutching the folds of the skirt/jacket together? (And/or pulling the short skirt down, as it may have hiked up by sitting?)

Putting on gloves?

Taking gloves off?

Spritzing perfume?

Grabbing a piece of gum?

Who knows?????

Anonymous said...

Just a guess; it's an evolutionary throwback, and they're waiting to see if you get attacked by wolves before venturing into the parking lot.

Anonymous said...

Just be glad that you are not married and have a mother-in-law to wait on to boot....MADDENING!

Anonymous said...

It is the same in a check out line at a store. I'm not sure if females are wired to anticipate that the next action (getting out of car, writing a check, etc.) will soon require them to act, so they don't act/react until it is their time. OR, maybe they tend to be more self centered, and don't consider/notice that they are making others wait. What about food shopping at a grocery store. Do woman know how to leave their cart anywhere other than the middle of the freaking isle?

Ro! said...

chivalry is not dead ya know.. Only nut job feminist not want you opening the door for them. its coded into their DNA!

Anonymous said...

Maybe that old fashioned chivalry was realy a message...'ok Hon...time to get out'

Anonymous said...

Perhaps she is waiting for you to open the door for her? Hasn't worked for my wife yet! :)

CapitalBabs said...

interesting - it's not a phenomenon that I have noticed before. Is it only women or do you find that male passengers also take a second or two longer than you to get out?

Just curious if perhaps you are just a bit quicker than average to the door and you know when your car is officially parked and still and it takes a second longer for a passenger to realize the vehicle has come to a complete stop at the terminal..

but it is a curiousity.

she said: said...

Don't women take longer to do everything?

I thought they did, because I'm constantly staring holes in the sides of their heads wishing they would hurry up.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps they have something in the way that hinders motor function in the arms or increased body weight in the torso, making movements less economical. Or it could be the same reason it takes them longer to urinate.

Anonymous said...

You bitch too much. Looking at it objectively, I'm sure there are things men (you) do that take an eternity according to women.

Anonymous said...

Well, Cap'n,

When I do it, it's because I AM hoping that the guy will come around and open my door. I realize it's not very 21st century of me, and of course you cannot SAY that's what you are waiting for, because that would be rude... so I take my time and hope that he is an old-fashioned enough man to do it. You'd be surprised - men often are, if you show them you won't bite their heads off for it.

Put it this way - if you go around and open her door, the best case scenario is that she will think you are chivalrous. Worst case scenario, when you are standing there holding the door, she will be obliged to hurry her butt up and get out of the car!

The Big Seester

Zabrina said...

It's usually clothing- or accessory-related. Her purse strap is stuck, wrapped around that little lever under the seat...her adorable but painful shoes are falling off, or her girdle or neckline or something else needs a quick jerk, fluff, or check. While you're whirling around the car, she's got a moment alone, and a much bigger arsenal of gear and hampering clothing to arrange. Be nice and just accept it, don't mention it. You could use the opportunity while you're behind your car to pick your teeth or something.

Captain Capitalism said...

I'm officially endorsing Mr. Fuller's "she's seeing if there are any wolves that will attack you whenst you step outside the car" theory.

Both for it's originality and plausibility.

Anonymous said...

My ex was the EXACT same way! I could never figure it out. She would wait until the car was completely off before getting her purse and other things ready to go.