Tuesday, April 30, 2019

The Older Brother Podcast #42 - The Return of John Steele Episode

Cappy, Chad, and John Steele field a ton of superchat questions as well as discuss:

Taking action versus talking about it
How to become a podcaster
Graduating from college at 16
Wiccan chicks are GREAT in the sack
Seattle Times is not journalism
Scott Greenstone is a hack.  TJ Martinell is a Journalist.
13 Reasons Why
Cheerleaders Chad and Cappy would have


In THIS EPISODE of The Older Brother Podcast!
Direct MP3 here.
YouTube here.

Support the show by doing your shopping here.

Monday, April 29, 2019

Traditional Gen Z Girls Looking for Husbands and Kids

For any of you Gen Z girls looking for dating advice, especially if you don't want to end up like the Baby Boomer, Gen X, or Millennial women, consider the video below:

And yes, business is a-booming at Asshole Consulting!

Saturday, April 27, 2019

The Clarey Podcast Weekend Double Header

Due to backed up articles of insane people and fan mail, Cappy does two episodes in one day of The Clarey Podcast and Asshole Consulting Live, starring Chad Elkins.

The Clarey Podcast - The "Stupid People" Episode includes:

Stupid People
Feminist Restaurant Closes in Oz
Cuckservative Fathers' Raising Insufferable Feminist Cuyuntahahhaaas
Fan Mail.

Podcast here
MP3 here
YouTube here

Asshole Consulting Live - The "Elkins Supremacy" Episode includes:

"Super Chads"
IT Virgins
Sigma Six is BULLSHIT

Podcast here
MP3 here
YouTube here

Friday, April 26, 2019

Socialism: The Religion of Millennials

I chat with Brett of The School Sucks Project about the Millennial generation and how their point and purpose in life was SPECIFICALLY designed and prescribed to them - socialism.  We then talk about how school (from K to college) was instrumental in getting Millennials to ONLY have socialism as their ONLY value in life and what a sad and pathetic life that must be.

I'd tell Gen Z to tune in, but they're too busy becoming Millennials v. 2.0 as we speak.  Still, an intellectually stimulating conversation for those with an IQ above 110.

Thursday, April 25, 2019

The Older Brother Podcast #41 - The "Women in Tech Regatta" Episode

Cappy gets a link from TJ Martinell about Seattle's "Women in Tech Regatta" and it's PRECISELY the worthless, cringey mess he thought it was.  He discusses:

"Story telling" now an adult profession.
"Life coaches, influences, and consultants."
Your vagina has no value.
How young sisters can actually CLOSE the wage gap.
and a fat broad blames her fatness on white people.

in THIS EPISODE of The Older Brother Podcast.
Direct Mp3 here.
Youtube here.

Sponsored by RDK Legal.  


Wednesday, April 24, 2019

It's Not Your Job to Unpack Her Desires

Economics and War

For the past couple of years I've been binging on war and battle documentaries and podcasts.  In part to learn history.  In part to learn about military tactics.  But also in part because I find it a fascinating study on economics.  Specifically the complete and total ignoring of it.  Because in nearly every instance of battle, war, and invasion the winner always had better economics.  And had the opponent in the war merely took the time to measure and assess their resources and economic efficiency against their adversary, most wars would have never been fought, millions of lives never lost, and thousands of economies never ruined.

Still, even to this day, economics I believe plays a subdued or unrecognized role in warfare and battle.  WWII is about the only war where resources maybe made it to the forefront, perhaps the frontal cortex of the Allies' brains.  But Hitler and Hirohito failed miserably to assess their economics versus the Allies and millions died and perished because of it.  Had Hitler and Hirohito just had better economics, WWII would have never started.

Still, this is the price we pay as a society for mis-measuring other countries' economics and economic potential.  Millions dead.  Economies destroyed.  Centuries lost.  And hundreds of millions of affected family members.  And so if we can do a better job assessing economic reality, we stand to gain tremendously as a global society.

But there are other instances where accurately assessing your adversaries' resources and economics comes into play.  It could be business, law, education, the drug trade - any instance where "game theory" would apply and there is not-so-much another enemy or adversary, but another "player" you are going up against in some form of competition.  Accurately assessing these other players' economics is vital, and can save you inordinate time, labor, money, and resources, even your life.  And while I cite war as the most costly example of mis-reading your adversary's economics, more common (and *almost* as costly) today is modern day men attempting to court modern day women.

How Many Trillions Did You Spend?

I first came to this epiphany when reading Roosh's book "Game."  I observed for a man that the leftist-media paints as a misogynist, his book was the most pro-female book ever written.  The reason why I concluded this is that though his book is intended to help men get laid, the hurdles, chores, responsibilities, and requirements he demands of men to meet girls is incredibly high.  Men must work out, strategize, forecast, study, major in the right thing, work hard, and predict women's every want and desire.  They must dote on every possible whim of women from here on into eternity.  And if you looked at what was being asked of men in order to "get women" it was incredibly dedicating, committing, even sacrificial on the part of men.  No book written by women even came close to asking of women what "Game" asked of men.

The Red Man Group also contributed to the realization and crystalization of this epiphany.  Tune into any one of their high-quality shows, and you'll find that the majority of their time is not so much spent on pick up tactics, advocation of hitting the gym, or talk of TRT, but understanding the psychology of women.  Like Roosh writing "Game," The Red Man Group bends over backwards to investigate, understand, and accommodate for women and women's psychology.  Again, I ask, "where is the female equivalent of such accommodations to recognize and accommodate for men's psychology?"

We could go on, but in nearly every case, blog, podcast, or vlog in the red pill community, men are spending inordinate amounts of time, labor, and resources trying to figure out what women want and delivering that to them.  And whereas you may find that sad or degrading - all these men wasting their lives trying to "figure out women" - the truth is that is what men are programmed to desire most in life - women.  And I can't shame or belittle anybody for following their genetic programming, simply because they don't have a choice.  No matter how bad things get, men will continue to want and desire women, and therefore there will always be a forum, discussion, or debate as to how to be successful in that endeavor.  This in a sense "condemns" men to spending at least a significant amount of their mental faculties opining about women (but will also thankfully provide us "red pill professionals" life long employment).

There is, however, a problem.

If women weren't difficult enough to "figure out," things have gotten a lot more complicated over the past 50 years.  Because if "men of yore" couldn't figure out women over the millennia, modern day men have a whole new level of complexity to work through.  And this complexity comes from feminism.

I don't say "this complexity comes in the form of feminism" because feminism is the philosophical incentive, motivation, or drive to create the form, not the form itself.  But you are all too familiar with the form that feminism has manifested itself in - the IMMEASURABLE amounts of time, labor, resources, and economics that has been spent over the past 50 years propagandizing, and ultimately warping modern day women.

From school to media to government to affirmative action to college to careers to Corporate America to fashion to even psychology, nearly every facet, aspect, segment and industry within the western world has either in part of fully dedicated INCREDIBLE amounts of resources and economics to turning women into something they're simply not.  Women shouldn't be mothers, they should be workers. They shouldn't be providers, they should be tax payers.  They shouldn't be feminine, they should be masculine.  They shouldn't be women, they should be men.  The tragedy of psychologically eliminating women from society is only outdone by the irony that "feminism" absolutely loathes, detests, and wishes to eradicate femininity.

But this issue revisits our discussion before about economics - how much precisely has been spent on indoctrinating women to go against their genetic code and become men?  And an even more important question - how much in resources do you think uncoordinated men can muster individually against such a well-financed feminist-war machine?

There is no way to measure it to the penny, but the amount of economics spent on brainwashing women into non-women is easily within the trillions.  The amount in education spending alone is within the trillions as hundreds of millions of women have gone through decades of education with nearly a trillion per year spent on K-college education.  Not all of that is feminist propaganda of course (I'm sure 40 cents was spent on reading, writing and arithmetic), but over the past 40 years my economic eye estimates easily multiple trillions of dollars (in today's money) has been spent by the education industry on the past two generations of women to turn them into non-women.

There's the media which, even pre-dating Oprah, has promoted women becoming non-women.  Be it The View, Oprah herself, Hollywood, the MSM, online rags like Salon, or the numberless number of non-profits that promote feminism in some form, nearly ALL of media is telling women to become a Captain Marvel and not a June Cleaver.  Here again you could argue trillions in actual financial dollars was spent brainwashing women in western media. But I would argue the non-monetary value of propaganda carries more economic value than the dollars spent themselves as it forms women's life goals and dreams, forcing them in turn to spend their entire life resources on feminist-dictated life goals.

Corporate America is a SPECTACULAR feminist success.  Women are not only going into trillions of dollars in student loan debt to pursue a career, but will waste their youth commuting, parking, getting CPE, all to climb that Cheryl Sandberg corporate ladder.  The money women make alone also generates trillions in tax dollars for the governments.  And let's not forget the trillions spent over the years on outsourcing their children to other government, feminist friendly institutions such as day care, schools, pre-k, and at times the juvenile justice system.

Corporate America also grants women purchasing power and financial independence.  One would hope they would spend that money on a 401k, IRA, and sensible housing, but sadly the fashion industry cashes in on this feminist-inspired financial boon as well.  With (more like only) "hundreds of billions" in "rah-rah-you-go-girl-ism" advertising, the fashion industry can quickly part these fools women from their money to buy shoes, handbags, trinkets, "flirtini's," overpriced luxury apartments, and the Sex and the City lifestyle they were promised on TV.  And since men aren't needed, companies like Target are now aggressively promoting plus size models because 'beauty has no number." Matter of fact beauty is on the inside, so women can now self-mutilate their bodies with piercings and tattoos (though this is only a $3 billion a year industry).

And then there's the psychology/pharmaceutical industry.  If at anytime trying to be something your not starts to take its toll or your "Masters in Creative Writing" doesn't land you a 6 figure job, but your 6 figure student loan debts *might* be causing some stress, that's alright, you can just pop a pill.  Popping a pill so much in fact that 1 in 4 women are on anti-depressants (that's just ONE drug, I was too lazy to care to look up statistics on others).  Again, I'm too lazy to look up the stats, but billions in economic resources more is also spent here to propagate the feminist narrative...or at least keep women from waking up to it.

I could go on, but when you add up the totality of what society spends in its entirety both in terms of financial and non-financial resources to brainwash women with feminism, and you compare that to the paltry amount the entire red pill community could possible muster to counter that, you'll quickly realize this is like the Somali pirates trying to take on the USS Ronald Reagan.  The red pill community, no matter how right, simply doesn't have the resources to counter the trillions of dollars and the trillions of hours and the decades of years that have been invested brainwashing today's women into being non-women

Equilibrium is a Bitch

But as is always with economics, the Law of Equilibrium is always upheld.  And while women may have been brilliantly and successfully propagandized into being non-women, there is a cost and a consequence.  Because no matter how many trillions in resources, trillions of hours, and decades of propaganda have been invested into turning women into non-women, genetics and biology will never go away.  And truth be told, women's genetics and biology is more powerful than all the government money in the world.  So when these two forces collide

- the trillions in economics spent on propagandizing women into feminism


- genetic reality

like a meteor hitting a planet a massive explosion takes place. 

This explosion manifests itself in a horrifically tearing and painful situation for women.  It pits women's biological reality against a totalitarian-and-forced propagandized reality.  And so women are unfortunately forced to choose between what their body and instincts are telling screaming at them, versus what the ENTIRE AUTHORITATIVE WORLD is demanding of them.  And here I truly feel sad for them because it's an impossible situation.

Though anecdotal, you can ask any psychologist or therapist who talks to young women today and they will say when all the puffing of their feminist chests are gone, these girls sheepishly admit all they want is to get married and have children.  Some will even say they don't want to go to college, but do so because their parents, teachers, and society forces them to.  And you don't even need to eavesdrop on therapists' anecdotes, I'm sure many of you have ran into a drunk woman who in her moment of weakness-inspired-truth confesses she really just wants to get married and have kids.

But what is interesting, as well as it is telling AND INSTRUCTIVE, is which side the majority of modern day women inevitably choose.  Yes, some rare women have the strength and courage to truly be independent minded, deciding to be a stay at home mom or a supporting wife.  But unfortunately, most go with the hive.  Most go with their synthesized feminist programming.  Most do not exercise critical thinking and let society do the thinking for them.  They choose the world feminism has bludgeoned them to choose.  And since this goes against their genetic programming, they now have a life of living in denial.

Living in denial has major costs and consequences, namely psychological damage.  And you can see this in the contradictory (and what I can only assume to be "maddening") behaviors of women.

For example the party girl who goes out partying with her girlfriends, has her bitchshields up, rejects the advances of nearly every man to get an arrogance-high...but then cries herself to sleep at night because she can't find a man.

The college-educated careerist who has to know how menopause works and must know the basics of "the biological clock," ...yet waits until her youth and beauty (and thus ability to attract a man) is all but gone to freeze her eggs, resorting to a surrogate birth mother to MAYBE have a child at 53.

There's the quarterly story of a woman who decides to marry a pirate ghost, her dog, her cat, a ferris wheel, or perhaps herself because she just "can't find a man."

Nearly every young woman now ships off to college, most of which will major in a completely worthless subject while incurring crippling levels of debt, making the whole endeavor not pointless, but damaging.  She will forever be confused why she isn't making enough to just get by as her student debts compound exponentially, consequently lessening her chances of finding a quality man who would ever bail her out of such a mistake.

Perhaps my favorite, where you really see genetics duking it out with feminism is where women WILL partially adhere to their biology and have a child...but in 80% of the cases will abandon the child to go back to work.  Bravo feminism, you made commutes, cubicles, and taxes more appealing than raising your own children.

And another instance where genetics gets into the ring with feminism, but loses in the end is where women will have children...but 43% of the time it's out of wedlock.  I'm sure there's no psychological damage or problems in broken, non-nuclear homes.

We could go on with instances where women either swallow the feminist propaganda whole or try to hybrid it by having their cake and eating it too, but the result is a life of misery, insanity, delusion, and depression.  But what it also is, is a life of contradiction.  Because while they're living the life they've been told to, they are not living the life they want to.  Yet at the same time, since they put their lot in with Team Feminism, they need to rationalize away this contradiction.  Otherwise they have to admit to themselves that their entire life, their entire efforts, all their education, all their entire existence on this planet as been a mistake, and they will have to start all over again at square one.  And it is this contradiction that adds a thick, impenetrable, impossible level of insanity.

An impenetrable level of insanity you boys must figure out if you're ever to be successful with modern day women.

Not My Mess.  Not My Problem.

Previous to feminism, women already spoke a completely different language than men.  Frustrating as that may have been for the "men of yore" over the millennia, it was also what made women cute, endearing, lovely, and charming to us.  It was a game to play.  A flirt to master.  A spar to win.  But now in addition to woo-master and charmer, it's your job to play....

political scientist,
male feminist,
gym rat,
gamer, and

all to sift through the psychological, insane bullshit and get to what she really wants.

Worse, women are not the only ones propagandized into feminism.  Men have been fed an equal diet of BS about how women like "sensitive, caring men," "be yourself," and "support women" which GREATLY handicapped and cost us in our youth.  No doubt many of you men had a long, arduous journey to deprogram yourself from the lies of feminism, and it's even debatable as to whether you have any energy left to now tackle this impossible task ahead of you today.  Regardless, the point is whether it's worth your time and effort to not only already figure women out on their "basic" genetic level, but to unpack their true desires out of the miles-deep, feminist-created propaganda and insanity. 

And I would argue no.

Not only are men woefully outgunned and out-organized in this war, we simply aren't equipped to handle what is essentially a nation-wide, culture-wide mental illness.  I already have a hard enough time being a ballroom dancing, mountain hiking, motorcycling economist.  I do not have the training nor inclination to be a therapist, psychologist, sociologist, strategist, or pick up artist.  Additionally, there just isn't enough time in the day for your average man to go to school, go to work, make a living, pay the bills, pay taxes, save up for retirement AND invest what is required to become a triple-doctorate in female psychology and sexuality to bend over backwards for women to "finally" figure out what they want a bring it to the surface.  It was hard enough to get women to go out with you when they liked men.  Now that they are competitors (at best) or adversaries (at worst) against men, each man must really sit and think about whether you'll get an acceptable ROI on your individual economics should you pursue women today.   

Why Cappy is Wrong

Yet at the same time, I am philosophically wrong.  Because we can talk philosophically about ROI all day or do you want to "go ghost" or "MGTOW," but in the end, just as women's genetic and biological hardwiring is undeniable, so are yours.  And while the majority of women prefer to stick their heads in the sand when it comes to this reality, at least men acknowledge we want women, we desire women, and its the most important thing we want in life.  It's why men in the Red Pill community may be beleaguered and embattled, but at least we're sane compared to our female counterparts.  Therefore, acknowledging this reality, it is YOUR responsibility to unpack her desires because if you don't, who will?  But if you're going to embark and this herculean task, do it wisely.

This is where Red Pill community provides incredible value, because even though the journey will be long and arduous, there's at least the path painted for your inevitable success.  Stalwarts such as Roosh, Rollo, the Red Man Group, Cooper, Popp, and many, many others have spent THOUSANDS of hours researching, theorizing, opining, assessing, failing, trial-and-erroring, and ultimately deriving strategies and tactics that at best "kinda work."  Better still, you won't have to master all the shoes of "psychologist, therapist, sociologist, PUA, gym rat, etc." just to suss out "what women really want."  There are better, more efficient, more effective tactics that work, even if you need to mine through 5,000 feet of feminist granite insanity.

But if you're going to ignore the red pill, or perhaps write it off as the hate group it's not, or just dismiss it thinking you'll be able to navigate the insane world of conflicted female nature, be prepared for not only failure, but a world of hurt.  Your genetics and biological hard-wiring condemn us all to the pursuit and desire of women.  And unless you're one of the few truly individualistic men who can go old-school-MGTOW, you and everybody else are going to go up against a much larger, better-financed, better-equipped, and better-organized enemy.  It is perfectly acceptable, even moral and self-respecting to refuse to help women out of a mental illness they inflicted upon themselves.  But if you're going to fling yourself on the insane Omaha Beach of modern women, I suggest you at least train, if not master the red pill before doing so.
Check out Aaron's other cool stuff below!


Men Will Never Like Fat Chicks


No matter how much you protest, whine, complain, or call people Nazis, even if you have the entirety of the US federal, state, and local governments budgets, you women will NEVER convince men being fat is beautiful.  You will waste more calories of energy complaining about genetic reality than had you hit the freaking gym and lost the weight.  And the only people who will lose in the end of this impossible battle will be the fat women who wasted their lives trying to make water dry, light dark, and fat sexy.

When Leftists Punish Themselves

AKA "Seattle is Dying." (this is a lengthy documentary so it isn't a short video)

If you wanted an abbreviated version, tune into this episode of The Masculine Geek around the 7 minute mark where they discuss it.

Tuesday, April 23, 2019

Academic Composition is Always Hiring Those Who Want to Work Remotely

A friendly reminder that long-time sponsor Academic Composition is always hiring!
Once more, an enormous thank you to Aaron and the crew.

Academic Composition continues to reach new heights and all of this has been possible because of your enormous help. 

We’re yet again in the hunt for fresh talent. We’re always looking for new marketers.

The matter is as simple as it has always been. Anybody can do this gig and to make it happen, this is what you need to do.

1. Create a new gmail account 

2. Activate the forwarding feature to make sure all incoming emails are sent to Aleksey.Bashtavenko@gmail.com (Yes, it’s super easy. Just Google “setting up forwarding with gmail).

3. Use that new email address to create a Craigslist account 

Then, we’ll send you the ads to post and all you need to do is copy and paste them. 

Finally, people will respond and we’ll pay you $5 for each response. 

Craigslist will require you to post within 300 miles of where you live, so be sure to let us know where you reside once you email us.

However, if you know how to use a VPN, you’re worth your weight in gold.

We look forward to hearing from all of you,

Academic Composition Management
Aleksey Bashtavenko
Academic Composition
Owner & Principal Writer
(540) 300-1253

Rogan Ruins Adam on Everything

Once Adam did the "debunking the alpha male" and his citing sources was a bit shoddy, I stopped really paying attention to the show.

Payback, however, is a bitch for doing shoddy work and promoting an agenda over reality.

Why the Left is a Bigger Threat than the Right

Monday, April 22, 2019

How to Find a Woman Who Can Cook

You are asking for the impossible in today's women.
Instead you should simply try to find a traditional woman and have her learn to cook.

Sunday, April 21, 2019

Tee Hee, I'm Majoring in Journalism!!!!

Oops.  No you ain't.

Oh well.  Weren't going to really be a productive member of society anyway.

Friday, April 19, 2019

There's No Such Thing as Journalism or Journalists Anymore

This was forced in front of my face as headline news on Bing, the search engine I prefer.

It is headline news because that's where the new is - on main search engines or the landing page when you log out of e-mail.

Here's the problem and I do not intend to besmirch the dead - she wasn't a journalist.

I hold myself as the bottom of the barrel metric when it comes to relevance, journalism or the media industry.  I have a mere 7,000 twitter followers and this here blog.  I never aimed to be nor claim to be a "journalist."  And if you are a professional journalist you should have a WAAAAY larger social media pull than my pathetic ass.  This "journalist" had less.

This journalist also got killed protesting which indicates to me she had an agenda and a narrative, a crusade in which she cared more about than reporting the news and actually being a journalist.

There is so much that is not said in this article about journalism and journalists I'll probably expand on it in my podcast, but for now, realize that journalism and journalists do not exist anymore.  It's just a bunch of kids on the internet with pet causes, causes of which at times end up in tragic deaths that should have never occurred had you just been an actual journalist and not an activist.

Cappy on Kerry Lutz's Show!

Since I'm a lazy bastard and in the middle of cleaning up the northern command for sale, today's standard "Clarey Podcast" will be an interview I had with Kerry Lutz a couple days ago.  We talk about the "new northern command," which is a "luxury apartment" building that all Millennials seem to want to live in now.  We also discuss the impossibility for millennials to retire if they keep spending $1,500 a month on rent and $8 for avocado and toast.  Tune in!

Thursday, April 18, 2019

The House on Lake Minnetonka That Never Existed

A Tale of Two Lakes

Allow me to regale you with the tale of two lakes - Lake of the Isles and Lake Minnetonka.

Many years ago, when the Captain was but a wee corporal, he was attending the University of Minnesota- Minneapolis.  Close to the campus was "the lakes." "The lakes" included four lakes that were chained together and formed the "crown jewel" of the Minneapolis parks system.  These lakes were:

Cedar Lake
Lake of the Isles
Lake Calhoun, and
Lake Harriet.

These lakes served as the hub of nearly all outdoor summer activity in Minneapolis and to this day remain the most popular part of the Twin Cities to be during summer.  But of the four lakes "Lake of the Isles" was the most prestigious.  Here the "old money" captains of industry built their Minneapolis mansions in the 1880's and 1900's, and thus Lake of the Isles is perimetered by beautiful mansions and even some modern day ones as well.

Because of its proximity to the campus me and my friends would regularly bike and run around this lake.  Not only for the beauty of the lake, but the architecture of the houses that surrounded it.  And even though one would prefer to run around this lake during summer, one of my fonder memories of the Twin Cities was running around Lake of the Isles at night during winter.

Even though it may have been -5 outside, I still enjoyed running around Lake of the Isles because it gave me my goal, my inspiration, and my incentive to work hard and study hard in school.  I did not come from wealth, but at night (and not in a creepy, stalker type sense) many of the mansions would have their lights on allowing me to kind of peer into these homes and wonder about what life was like on the inside.

What was it like to have a nice warm home and not sleep in a basement?
What was it like to have so much wealth you didn't have to worry about student loans?
Is that a wall oven I see?  Is the wife of that home making dinner?  Gosh, a home cooked meal would be great.
And forget dinner, I bet those people have nothing to worry about. They're RICH.  They got it made.

It also helped that while running during winter it was usually Christmas time, allowing my mind to further wander and dream, speculating about awesome Christmas gifts, nuclear family meals, perhaps sitting down and watching the Charlie Brown Christmas Special.  And adding to this spectacle was that (at least in the 90's) nearly every house would put up an impressive display of Christmas lights.  I may had been the only fool running around Lake of the Isles at 10PM in -5 degree weather, but it was and remains today one of my fondest memories.

Enter in Jeff.

I met Jeff through a tango dance class and he lived on a lake called "Lake Minnetonka."  I had only heard of this lake before, but never had the time nor inclination to go visit it (as it would turn out I had gotten lost on my bike one time and meandered across one of its bays by accident when I was 18, but at the then age of 25 I had yet to knowingly visit it).  He was having a party on his boat and was going to take some friends out on the lake and wondered if I would like to come along.  Having been on my fair share of pontoon boats in Wisconsin, I though "sure, fun little boat, fun little lake, grand ole time."

Little did I know what I was about to see.

For Lake Minnetonka is not some "puddle" in the middle of Wisconsin.  It's a large, vast, multi-chambered, multi-bayed monster of a lake.  It's so beautiful and has so many tucked-away bays that it was the number one vacation destination of the United States before the national parks were started.  It had an amusement park on an island for a couple decades.  Ports that steam ships could travel inbetween with luxury hotels at each stop.  But the most impressive thing about this lake is not so much its size or its rich history, but the incomprehensible level of wealth that it has attracted.  The houses mansions that are built on this lake are as numerous as they are spectacular.

And they put to shame the paltry shacks I was once enamored with on Lake of the Isles.

What I was witnessing was the difference between "old money" and "new money."  The beautiful pieces of architecture on Lake of the Isles were built by "old money."  The Dayton's, the Pillsbury's, the General Mill's, the Phillips.  But they were outdone (by technology and economies to scale) by the Cargill's, the Carlson's, the Petter's and the Hecker's.  But regardless of whether it was a house on Lake of the Isles or a mansion on Lake Minnetonka, at this point in my life I was slowly realizing that the real world was not going to allow me to achieve what I had desperately worked for.  I chose my profession poorly, and no matter how hard I would work, banking was just too inefficient, corrupt, and nepotistic that instead of starting to squirrel away money for a house on Lake of the Isles, I was hoping to just get enough money to afford groceries that month.  Alas, all the houses on Lake of the Isles would remain a movie-like dream I would run through my mind as I'd run around the lake, while the houses on Lake Minnetonka would be just a laughable, comical, even cartoonish delusion of wealth, stability, and happiness.

But then something happened.

Look Under the Hood

While I am an absolutely horrible banker, I am exceptionally good at finance and economics.  To be a banker requires you wear a suit, you have an IQ below 110, you focus on sales, and become a "wheeler-dealer-idea" type of guy.  You play the game, you play ball, you suck cock, and you kiss ass.  You do anything and everything you can to avoid real work, real detailed analysis, or anything that would take thought or effort, yet portray yourself as a "business man" too busy to be bothered with details and who is the powerhorse behind seeing "the big picture" and "getting the deal done."  I say this not because I hate bankers or have a score to settle with them.  I say this because I hate bankers, have a score to settle with them AND it's also true.  Bankers are truly inferior, incompetent, scumbags. And I'm not joking in the slightest when I say most should be shot.

However, even though I was horrible at being a banker, I was still hired on in 2006 to work at a bank as an analyst and economist.  And where did this bank happen to be?

Lake Minnetonka.

It looked like I was actually going to get a peek into the world of "laughable, comical wealth."

But while I was under the impression our clientele would be rich people, high-networth individuals, and millionaires with houses on the lake, the reality was something completely different.  And not only different, but a bizarro world different where things just didn't make sense.

First, nearly every commercial client we had would pull up in a luxury car.  A Mercedes, a BMW, a Maserati, and (if you were of the female persuasion) a Range Rover. Invariably it would be your "stereotypical middle aged white man" who presumably epitomized wealth, riches, and success, but when you looked at their balance sheets, income statements, and tax returns, they were anything but.  ALL their cars were leased, their loans and lines were maxed out, they were coming to the bank to ask for more money, and there wasn't a sliver of equity in their homes.  Yes, their homes were on Lake Minnetonka. Yes, their homes were worth $4.5 million.  But when you added up all their assets and all their liabilities, they would have $5 million in assets, but $6 million debts. Most waitresses I  knew had a higher net worth than most of these guys living on Lake Minnetonka.

Second, there was no money, cash flow, or profit.  I was under the delusional belief that in order to be rich, in order to have assets, somewhere, some how, you had to make an income of some sort to build up the cash to purchase things or at least invest in them.  And maybe you wouldn't pay 100% cash for a $3 million house, but you'd likely be making $450,000 a year to qualify for the $2.5 million mortgage you'd need to pay for such a house.

Nope.  Cash flow and profit were ne'er to be seen at this Lake Minnetonka Bank.

The tax returns would show losses (but I was assured that's because they were "trying to lower their tax bill.")
Their audited income statements would also show losses (but that's because they were section 179-ing some major capital purchases)
Their cash flow statements showed a bleeding of money (but that's because this one year was a bad year and Jim hadn't paid him yet).
And their cash accounts would be perpetually overdrawn (suggesting to me there was no profit in the first place and their financial statements were bupkis anyway).

In short, the only way these "successful Lake Minnetonka millionaires" had any assets was they borrowed stole other people's money from our bank of which they had no ability nor intention of every paying back.

I could go on with details about the horrifically poor state of these "rich people's" finances, but the larger point is that out of ALL the clients we had at this Lake Minnetonka bank, only...


we actually "rich."  Let alone rich enough to live and afford a house on Lake Minnetonka.  The rest were all posers using other people's money to act rich.

Here Comes the Boom

I was hoping it was just this one bank I worked for, but I knew better.  The other banks I had worked for had equally appallingly bad clients and equally appallingly bad finances.  And you didn't have to work for a bank to look at their finances.  You could go to the FDIC and look at their institution directory and see that ALL banks were making horrible loans to horrible people and were using over-inflated properties to collateralize them and finance their money-losing "businesses."  OREO, delinquent loans and loans in default were going up as a percent of bank's portfolio.  When I'd audit appraisals I'd see the most outlandish assumptions and lies just to "get the valuation" needed to "magically" make the loan to value at 80%.  I'd ram heads with gray haired baby boomer bankers who I knew were desperate to get their 2% commission on dead-deals because I knew they had just signed the lease on a Mercedes themselves to impress wifey-poo.  And when the president of our bank said, "We're going to lend out way out of this mess" in 2007 I knew we were in for a world of hurt.  It wasn't until one of my bankers got a visit from an FBI agent did I really realize just how totally and utterly fucked this Lake Minnetonka bank was.

From 2007 on you all know the rest of the story on a national level.  But locally the "stars" of the Lake Minnetonka scene were quickly falling.  Tom Petters - a "successful Minnetonka businessman" - was busting on the largest financial scandal in US history ( that is until Bernie Madoff outdid him).  Local auto-magnate and Lake Minnetonka property owner, Denny Hecker was also ensnared by the Great Recession, landing him in jail.  Local Minnetonka celebrity realtor Adam LaFavre ran into trouble.  And though I never knew his name, there was a local guy who drove a yellow Lotus sports car.  I even remember seeing him in the local Lake Minnetonka "elite-look-at-us-rich-people-masturbation" magazine in articles such as "Thadeus McThadeusson, local playboy extradorinaire is hanging out with Bambi Bamberson in his iconic yellow Lotus."  His Lotus and himself quickly disappeared once the recession hit.  I guess my local waitress had more equity and cash in her accounts than he did.

Lake Minnetonka anecdotes aside, it wasn't just local celebrities that were biting the dust.  During the Great Recession a ton of "for sale signs" went up on properties all around Lake Minnetonka.  The bank I worked at got taken over by the feds, their executive team and board replaced.  Our competitor on the "other side of the lake" also had to close up shop.  And there were a lot less boats at hot spots like "Lord Fletchers" and "Sunsets" (popular places people with other people's money like to spend other people's money).  It wouldn't be until a full decade later of money printing and artificially low interest rates would Lake Minnetonka return to normal, but the sheer amount of for sale signs, foreclosures, drop in boat traffic, piss poor financial statements, and other economic indicators in 2008 showed me that this "laughable, comical, cartoonish" level of wealth I saw on Lake Minnetonka was precisely that - it didn't exist. Nearly every house on Lake Minnetonka was a house of cards built on debt and only a very few people who lived there actually had any cash flow or genuine wealth to the level they could legitimately claim they could AFFORD to live on Lake Minnetonka.

Return to Lake of the Isles

By this time I had moved out of the Twin Cities and would only return to get Sebastian Joe's ice cream, Rumpleminze at Mancini's, martinis at Jax's Cafe, or whiskey at Lee's Liquor Lounge. However, a run around "the lakes" had become a tradition for me and if time permitted it, I would run it.  And in 2008 what was happening on Lake Minnetonka was also happening at my beloved Lake of the Isles.

For sales signs were up.  Some foreclosure signs too.  I recall a house or two that had construction stalled and were temporarily boarded up.  But unlike Lake Minnetonkans where their borrow-and-pray strategy was failing, the Lake of the Isles-ians were simply running out of trust-fund money.  These homes were built long ago on business empires that were sold long ago.  And unless you were a lucky baby boomer like Mark Dayton and they empire your grandfather had left you was in the billions, many-o-baby boomer trust funders were simply unable to afford the egregious marxist property taxes they kept voting in upon themselves.

But whereas the "for sale" signs on Lake Minnetonka was vindicating for me, the "for sale" signs on Lake of the Isles were somewhat stinging and depressing.  15 years previous I had ran around past those homes scores of times, viewing them as invincible castles of wealth, prosperity, and stability.  They were the foundation of what I wanted and what I built my dreams off of.  I wanted the warm, cozy fire on a -5 Christmas Eve night.  I wanted the nuclear family that was SURELY in that home, with a beautiful wife who could be cooking for me.  I wanted those awesome Christmas gifts.  And I wanted the millions of dollars that was SURELY in the bank account that would ensure I would never have to worry about affording food, lodging, clothing, or a heat bill ever again.

The "for sale" signs and "foreclosure" signs made me realize these houses, and thus my dream, was never a reality, and thus a possibility.  The warm lights at night I saw were not reflecting upon a stable nuclear family, but a standard, typically baby boomer couple who were likely going to get divorced.  The fire place I saw was not heating up a stable nuclear family, but a spoiled rotten brat family whose trust fund had made their kids soft and likely on drugs.  And the perfectly ordained Christmas lights were not put up because of any kind of Christmas cheer, but perhaps a competition to keep up with the "Pillsbury the IV" or a "Dayton the VII."  Like other people who inherited their wealth, it was soon squandered and any stability I thought I saw was never there.

The House on Lake Minnetonka That Never Was

Even with my dreams dashed in front of me, running around Lake of the Isles in 2007, it wasn't until a full 9 years later did I fully comprehend, recognize, and appreciate the importance of the lesson presented to me at that time.  I knew I was sad.  I knew it was depressing to see those houses and what I thought was in them go away.  But it didn't fully crystalize into an understandable epiphany for my frontal lobes to understand concretely until I was on another boat 9 years later on Lake Minnetonka.

This time it was my buddy Bob's boat.  We were riding with his parents who were one of the lucky few to actually OWN AND AFFORD a house on Lake Minnetonka.  It was a beautiful summer evening, no mosquitoes, no wind, and thus a smooth-as-glass lake to ride across on this small, humble pontoon boat.  A couple beers in we were just skirting the shoreline.  Bob's folks were telling us about the different houses and the neighbors.  And while nothing particularly interesting was said aside from when the house was bought, or whether they were nice neighbors or not, when we got to a particularly nice looking house Bob's mom said,

"Oh, that's the Johnson's house.  That poor woman.  She'll never make her business go."

I asked, "What's her business?"  To which Bob's mom said, "Mary Kay."

It took a bit to register, but I looked back at the house as we had passed it.  Here was this $400,000 McMansion of a house.  The property of which it sat on was easily $2 million.  And the wife of the household is selling Mary Kay?

Then it finally hit me.

Be it a house on Lake of the Isles or a mansion on Lake Minnetonka, every expensive, beautiful house is like this.  Nearly every house - whether it's a mansion, a McMansion, a castle, or palatial estate - every house is a house of cards, a display, an act, a facade.  Very few people actually have the money to own their houses (like Bob's parents), but even if they did the Norman Rockwell life we picture inside these homes does not exist.  90% of the case because they money really isn't there.  It's just borrowed money they don't have.  But also because in 90% of the cases the people themselves are not who we imagine them to be.  They are divorced, on the verge of bankruptcy, trust fund babies, from broken homes, running money-losing hobbies, constantly fighting against one another, banging the secretary, banging the pool boy, or relying on Mary Kay to make ends meet.  And while as a young person you may understandably be led to believe that a rich house and the life you think you see in it is what you want, it's more important you understand how statistically unlikely that is, but also how the people and personal life you lead is more important than the house you have.

Many years ago as a kid I would be invited to another kid's birthday party.  We would go to their house and every time I was excited that the house had two things:

1)  A color television
2)  A second story

Throw in a bunch of toys these kids had in the garage, and I thought these kids were rich.  Perhaps they were, perhaps they weren't, but in each and every instance those kids' folks inevitably got divorced.  Some filed for bankruptcy.  And whatever dream-like wealth, happiness, and stability I thought was there was gone.  Worse, it was never there in the first place because no matter whether you have a television or not, a second floor or not, or a garage full of toys or not, it was the minority of instances you had a stable, loving family that did not get divorced or have problems.

This has two major ramifications that will help you out in life, especially if you are younger and just starting to assess what you would want most out of life.

First, do not focus on what society tells you you should want.  There's nothing wrong with beautiful homes, rich homes, even palatial estates if you can afford them.  And there is nothing wrong with actually being rich.  But unless these homes house stable, loving relationships either through the form of a family or spouse, it doesn't matter how beautiful or expensive the house is.  You will be miserable.  Additionally, unless you are one of the rare 10% who can actually afford your home, then that home will simply become the financial bane of your existence making your life infinitely worse, even if you do in fact like on Lake Minnetonka.  Yes, I'm sure it was nice living on Lake Minnetonka or Lake of the Isles either on trust fund money or borrowed money for that short decade you lived there.  But once it ran out and you had to return the Lotus, your life will forever be inferior henceforth.

Second, envy.  I cannot emphasize enough how envy, jealousy and greed ruins millions of people's lives.  You simply see somebody who you THINK has more than you and at best you envy that person to become like them, but more likely you envy that person and hate him.  That jealousy and hate is not only going to ruin you and lessen your life, but there TRULY is nothing to be jealous or envious of.  For every rich, middle aged, gray haired white guy you see driving a convertible Porsche this summer, I'll show you a car loan at 11%, a credit score of 540, alimony payments to a former trophy wife, children who hate him, and an old man who knows he's dying and is vainly trying to give his pointless, meaningless life value with a car he can't afford.  For every trophy wife soccer mom driving her SUV to the nail salon, I'll show you a 38 year old woman who is deathly afraid of growing old, deathly afraid of her husband running off with a 28 year old, who is STILL in the middle school mentality of playing "queen bee" of the social world who actually thinks buying Prada shoes or Gucci handbags gives her statusm AND has to suck dick of a guy she doesn't particularly like because her degree in "Sociology" from St. Kates won't compensate her for the allowance and spending account her husband gives her (which he borrows from the bank of course).  These people are just one recessionary hiccup away from losing it all and losing face in front of their equally insolvent and vain faux-rich friends, and what's sad is that "facade," that "face" is all they have in life.  Trust me, you don't want to envy them.

What I recommend instead is you focus your efforts, resources, care, and love on your fellow man and surrounding yourself with good, quality people in your life who make you happy.  You do not focus on material things be it a car or a house, let alone one that is not truly own, and instead owned by the bank.  Because if I learned anything from those houses on Lake of the Isles or Lake Minnetonka it's that

the wealth never existed
the stability was never there
and the happiness was all but a facade.

Enjoy the decline.
Check out Aaron's other cool stuff!


Wednesday, April 17, 2019

The Older Brother Podcast #40 - The "Financial Advice for Webcam Girls" Episode

Cappy and Chad discuss:

The 4 lessons everybody must learn after tax season.
"No Coffee for Old Clarey's"
The world is getting dumber.
NEVER donate to charity.
Financial advice for webcam girls.


In THIS EPISODE of The Older Brother Podcast!

Direct MP3 here.
YouTube here.
Do all your fucking online shopping here.


Tuesday, April 16, 2019

Before You Get Married...Before You Get Divorced


I rarely say things are a "must read" or a "must listen" because in actuality they aren't.  Most of us are already too busy and engaged in highly productive endeavors that to "read this book" or "see this movie" just isn't worth sacrificing something else we already have going on. 

However, this is worth listening to.

The reason it's worth listening to is most of you are going to go off and get married.  Half of you will get divorced.  And I want you to understand what it's like after you get divorced so you may more fully assess whether you want to get married in the first place.  Adam (the man in the podcast) is doing WELL, SPECTACULAR given the situation he's in.  And still it's painful to hear how cleaning his car, or organizing his apartment, or just focusing on work is what are the granular, daily steps he is taking to keep it together.

Also keep in mind this is a real man with a real life and has done more in his life than most people will do in 10.  And if a wife of questionable value just ups and leaves him AND it puts him in this state of impulse power only, I can only imagine when a girl you guys have oneitis for leaves you AND you are not the man Adam is, you'd be an inconsolable pile of goo.

Make damn sure the girl you're going to get married to is the one.  And make damn sure you are strong enough to continue if she decides to " I'm not haaaapppppyyyy" you and go away.

But Who Will Fuck the Feminists?

Let alone impregnate them?

It's sad that their lives are so sad that yellow-sensationalism journalism or "shock" news is the only thing that gives them purpose and meaning in life.  Oh well, keep coming up with "crazy stuff" ladies!  I'm sure you'll remember it fondly on your death bed.

Destroying Millennial Men's Life Expectations

Some more loves and kisses from Asshole Consulting.

Monday, April 15, 2019

A World Without Immigration

One of the more interesting requests of the day from Asshole Consulting:

Sunday, April 14, 2019

As You Rush to Do Your 2018 Taxes

Though the people who tune in and read the Ole Capmeister here are indeed in the top 5% of intelligent people in the world, PROCRASTINATION knows no bounds and infects the smart just as much as it infects the stupid.

Thus as many of you are rushing to complete your 2018 taxes, you will also be asked "Do you want to make a contribution to your IRA for 2018?"  The answer is yes, but more importantly, if you are procrastinating on your taxes, you are also likely procrastinating on your retirement planning.

So may I introduce the easiest way to retire - Poor Richard's Retirement.

I won't bore you nor lecture you, but I will simply tell you THE NANOSECOND YOU ARE DONE filing your 2018 taxes, please go and buy this book (and read it) and get cracking on your retirement planning.  You do NOT want to be like the baby boomer morons who are coming up to me at 62 and saying,

"I'm 60 and haven't started saving for retirement.  It's time to get serious!  how do I retire at 65."

Please, dear god almighty do NOT  become like these people where you are simply going to work till you're dead.  GET POOR RICHARD'S RETIREMENT NOW and spare yourself the horrific fate of outliving your money!

Friday, April 12, 2019

The Clarey Podcast #287 - The "Ride Along with Cappy" Episode

Cappy doesn't record from home today because he needed to get out of the house. Enjoy a "Go Nowhere Rambling Ride" as Cappy drives through towns like Scandia, Dresser, Taylors Falls and Forest Lake!

Podcast here.
MP3 here.

Sponsored by The Men's Advocate!

Why You Never Donate to Charity

There is no such thing as "charities." 

Only scams.

My Review of "Shazam!"

3.75 out of 4
Definitely worth seeing in the theaters.
Go when there are no kids.

"We Exited Student Lending in 2009"

Because only the government is stupid enough to lend to today's college kids...as evidenced by Maxine Waters' supreme stupidity.

Georgetown Students Vote for Good Feels

I'd go into a long diatribe, but you already know what the points would be.

I will point out THEY are not paying for it.  College students do not pay for anything.  Their parents and the taxpayers do.

Wednesday, April 10, 2019

Selling Millennials Their Purpose, Agency, and Reason in Life

Baby boomers want their social security.
Gen X'ers wanted nuclear families.
And Millennials want a purpose and reason to live in life.

But no matter how much we want something in life, that does not guarantee we'll get it.

For example the Boomers were lucky that the US is the world's reserve currency and in so being we can afford to print off more money without any major consequences to bail us out of our incredibly stupid economic decisions.  The boomers also have the fortune of lucky timing in that the US economy will not likely collapse before most of them are dead and therefore have collected on decades of social security.

Another - but counter example - Gen X and stable, nuclear families.  Some got them.  Most did not, and unlike social security, there's no way to go back in time to have a dad, have Thanksgiving dinner, and live under one roof.  Most will remember living under multiple homes, with multiple parents and what I like to call "the hand off" where you were "handed off" from one parent to another in a parking lot, a mall, or a Wal-Mart.  The dice were not lucky for Gen X in this regard and they consequently will NOT be getting what they wanted.

The issue is then whether the Millennials will get what they out of life.  And what they want is something much more basic, but all the more important than "social security" or a "nuclear family" - a reason and purpose to live life.

Fortunately, they will inevitably find a point and purpose in life.
Sadly, they won't like it in the long run.

Because the Millennial generation has already been given a reason to live.  They have been given a prescripted and predetermined reason and purpose in life.  They did not get to choose it.  They had no say in it.  And it actually serves others instead of the Millennials.  But they DO at least have a point and purpose to live nonetheless, and that point and purpose is...


Take for example Aspiration.

This is just the latest in the thousands of companies combining politics with a product they sell.  The originators of this idea were actually Gen X'er coffee store owners who started the whole "fair trade-organic made" scam promotion in the 90's.  The aim was truly to do nothing but feel good about themselves, but it also had an ancillary benefit in that it differentiated your product from everybody else's.  It wasn't a huge advantage.  It didn't materially make your product any better.  And most of the time companies were lying about their leftist-credentials anyway.  But regardless, now "everybody" is organic, fair trade, carbon-foot-print, all-female company, yada yada yada.  Gillette is anti-male.  Target can't shut up about their genderless bathrooms.  Lumber 84 promotes illegal immigration.  And even lingerie stores are promoting fat models.  The time is coming every non-explicitly conservative/libertarian company will attach politics to their marketing in an effort to win over more loyal customers (whether being actually environmentally friendly or not).

But did you ever ask yourself why for-profit, large-multiational, multi-billion dollar corporations are explicitly promoting their leftist credentials and not their traditional, boring republican, "higher quality at a lower price" credentials?  Why would at least SOME companies not advocate a pro-freedom, pro-American, pro-west form of corporate virtue signaling?

Well this gets back to the whole point about what gives Millennials value, purpose, and reason in living.

Ever since they were 5 years old, Millennials have been told what their values and purpose of reason of living will be.  And though not explicitly told "this is the reason you will live," they were so successfully and clandestinely brainwashed, it's sadly the only reason and purpose of living they have - their leftist politics.

Fair trade.
Organic trade.
Transgender bathrooms.

The list goes on, but what inevitable political crusade or cause they choose as their "ism-de-jure," it's leftism just the same.  And that's why corporations and companies exclusively advertise to the left.  Because leftist politics is what gives these people point, purpose, and meaning in life.  But there is a drawback.

Politics is a surrogate, not a real reason to live in life.

Yes, you may be a very successful careerist feminist, worshiping at the altar of Sheryl Sandberg, but you will not be a very good or present mother.

Yes, you may value your sensitive male sensibilities, voting the right way, strumming your acoustic guitar, hitting on girls at the organic coffee shop.  But you will not be able to attract a wife, let alone afford a family on your Masters in Poetry degree.

Yes, you may have spent your time protesting one thing or another, but it came at the expense of working extra hours at the office to pay off your debts so that someday you might be able to afford a house.

This isn't to say that Millennials aren't pursuing families, aren't getting married, or aren't inevitably becoming homeowners.  But their lackadaisical performance in these areas indicate to me that they are putting more value, and thus more time, into their religion of politics, and less on real-world self improvement be it the gym, a real education, a decent career, or prudent personal financial management.  And corporate America's insistence on focusing their advertising on socialist politics instead of the merits of the products (quality craftsman tools, home-making benefits, ease of home life, reliability of a car, etc.) confirms that this generation values politics above all else, even reality.

Sadly, as I've said before, it's too late for the Millennials.  They're now thoroughly in their 30's, endebted, post-poning families and/or love for politics, educations, and quasi-careers.  Yes, some will get married.  Yes, some will find love.  Yes, some will have meaningful careers.  Yes, some will have homeownership.  And yes, by gum, some might even successfully retire.  But for most they will achieve nothing and have nothing that would have traditionally given humans their worth and value.  And they will only have their politics to point to as a hallow and pathetic reason as to why they have value on this planet.

The real tragedy is that the joke's on them.  Because just like the colleges and universities, Corporate America will make trillions off of them selling them "politics" as their sole purpose and meaning in life.  Even more tragic, the millennials will still think these institutions - who ruined their lives - are their friends.

And to that I say "Enjoy the Decline."
Check out Aaron's other cool stuff!  Who knows!?  You might learn something!

 Sponsored by!

Monday, April 08, 2019

The Older Brother Podcast #39 with DT

Cappy and DT discuss

End Game.
Death metal.
Baby boomers pricing millennials out of the starter home market.
Not enough time.
Getting rid of the lawn equipment

in THIS EPISODE of The Older Brother Podcast!
Direct MP3 here.

Youtube Below

Sponsored by:

Tuesday, April 02, 2019

Diamonds, Steel, and Stars

"How Do I Get Da Gurlz?"

The most loathed question I get at Asshole Consulting is the infamous:

"How do I get da gurlz?"

The reason I loathe this question has nothing to do with the question itself, nor does it have anything to do with the answer.  It's that the person asking it is invariably, 100%, and always a lazy, nerdy, weak man who simply doesn't want to hit the gym, doesn't want to diet, doesn't want to risk rejection when asking out girls, and is hoping there's some sort of short cut that will magically "poof"  get da gurlz.  It is his cowardice and laziness that angers me, and is why I charge a $50 surcharge to answer a question - the answer of which is easily searchable on the internet for free.

The second most loathed question I get at Asshole Consulting is;

"What should I do for a business idea?"

This question also makes me go from zero-to-rage in about 3 nanoseconds because the person asking the question is really asking "Hey, I'm too lazy to think up or research my own idea.  Can you just GIVE ME a multi-million dollar idea for free?" not realizing that the reason entrepreneurs are successful is because they come up with ideas and products NOBODY ELSE HAS.  Also the ludicrous expectation that if I had a successful business idea that I would just sell it for a $35 consulting fee is laughable.  Idiocy aside, it is the laziness of the people who ask this question which boils my blood, as well as prevents them from ever becoming a successful entrepreneur in life.

I could go over many other hypocritical questions I receive, but at the core of all these questions is a fear, cowardice, and laziness that sends these people to my consultancy.  These clients simply want a short cut, a cheat code at all things hard at life, and are so afraid of hard work and labor, they will pay money for somebody, ANYBODY to tell then there's an effortless way to success, happiness, and love.  And whereas I simply cannot lie to these people, telling them what they want to hear, there's no shortage of Oprahs, psychologists, college recruiters, motivational speakers, life coaches, democrats, and other snake oil salesmen who promise people success, happiness, and love all through an easy pill, an easy book, an easy college degree, or an easy $5,000 weekend retreat.

And most people are weak enough, lazy enough, and dumb enough to fall for it.

The Most Addictive Drug in the World

There is a problem, however, in believing pretty lies over harsh truths.  Namely, you will fail at life.  You will not attain financial success.  You will not become sexy.  You will not find love.  And you will not find happiness.  In looking for the short cut that does not exist, you waste your one and only precious resource on this planet (time) investing in lies instead of laboring in truth.  And while it may feel good in the moment to "major in creative writing" or pop a pill to fight depression you don't have (instead of just running a couple miles), in the end you do nothing to improve yourself.

The reason why is that you, personally, are not doing any thing.  You are taking no actions.  You are making no decisions.  You are simply letting things happen to you in life.  And since these things do not originate from you, you are not in control of your future.  Thus, by the time your incredibly short 78 years of this planet is over, YOU will have done nothing but let life happen to you.  You will be accomplishmentless.  You will be unnoteable.  You will be irrelevant. You will be the epitome of pointless.  Your life, LIKE MOST OTHERS will be meaningless as you die just like one of the billions of conformist, boring, lazy, unaccomplished sheep that came before you.  You quite literally could never have been born because your life had zero value.

But what's funny, is even having this concrete knowledge, even knowing your life will end and that there are no short cuts, people will still choose the path of wasting their lives on sweet lies instead of living their lives laboring in accomplished truth.  So much so, that lies are not "like" a drug, but they ARE a drug, arguably the most addictive and powerful drug in the world.  It's so severe that I've launched my clandestine "Operation Evil" to essentially be a peddler of this drug because I want me some of that "Oprah, Ocasio-Cortez, Democrat-Party, Tai Lopez, Cosmopolitan, Big Education money."  Regardless, it is only a very, very few select people who have the intellectual strength, courage, and work ethic to live a life of truth, let alone pursue a life of excellence, which is what I think deep down inside most of my clients, colleagues, and peers want.  So if you really want the truth, you REALLY want to be successful and happy in life, then you need to understand how diamonds, steel, and stars are formed...as well as go through the process yourself.

Baptism by Fire

Coal is an abundant resource of which there are entire states full of it.  You can literally drive through Wyoming, look out your window, and you will see MOUNTAINS of coal.  Hundreds of cubic miles of coal that the world will never run out of.

Yet, if the conditions are right you may get a practically immeasurable amount of coal to turn into diamonds.  This requires incredible heat along with incredible pressure, which is usually only found in the formation of volcanoes, and even then it is incredibly rare that diamonds form.  Still they do, and we kill or enslave poor black children in Africa to get them so privileged white women will suck our dicks, and their existence is proof that an incredibly powerful, even creative-destructive process had occurred to create this change. Something that is relatively worthless now becomes incredibly precious not because of the end product itself, as much as the galvanizing process that created it.

Steel is also similar.

Though not as rare as diamonds, steel is formed by a powerful, creative-destructive process wherein iron is mixed with a little bit of carbon and then cooled to create steel.  However, there are many variables that determine the many traits of your final steel product.  How much carbon is added?  When was the carbon added in the galvanizing process?  How quickly or slowly did it cool?  Yes, steel does come out stronger than iron, but all the variables within the galvanizing process ultimately determines its strength, brittleness, density and malleability.  These characteristics not only give various forms of steel their specific strengths and weaknesses, but makes them much more useful and thus valuable than mere iron.

And finally stars.

Stars start off as the second most boring thing in the universe - hydrogen.  I say "second most boring" because hydrogen is the first and smallest and simplest form of matter that exists.  The next step below it is "nothing" or mere "space."  So suns start out as "the first step above nothing."

But if you get a critical mass of hydrogen within a certain proximity to one another, gravity takes over, and slowly, but surely the hydrogen atoms start to congregate and attract one other.  In due time there is so much hydrogen that the forces of gravity, pressure, and heat become so strong, it fuses hydrogen atoms into helium resulting in a fusion nuclear reaction that ignites the star.  Again we see something from nothing due not so much to the "nothingness" of hydrogen, but the revolutionary process of nuclear fusion.  And again we see something of value originating from something of worthlessness because of the process, not the thing itself.

But be it stars, steel or diamonds, humans are no different.  The vast majority of humans are about as valuable as individual atoms of hydrogen, a lump of coal, or the unearthed and unrefined ore of iron.  They are worthless, they are pointless, they will never amount to or achieve much of anything.  Out of the estimated 150 billion humans who have lived and died on this planet, a mere 10,000 are the ones who made history and set forth humanity on the path it is today.  But whereas coal, hydrogen, iron and carbon are inert elements and compounds, humans are not.  Humans (at least in theory anyway) have sentience, intelligence, consciousness, and independent thought.  They can make decisions, they (at least in theory anyway) can choose their path in life, and therefore can (in theory anyway) wield some control over their lives and futures.

But what separates the star-humans, the steel-humans, and the diamond-humans from the mindless, sheeple slop is that these humans CHOOSE to go through the galvanization process.  They CHOOSE to SUFFER, ENDURE, and SURVIVE the incredibly painful, destructive-creative process that turns them into a diamond or steel of a human.  And because they do not let fear, cowardice, sloth, or laziness condemn them to a life of mediocrity and commoness, they become a truly genuine superior human compared to the rest of the cattle posing as people.  More importantly, they are one of the few humans who do not to waste their precious life, choosing to affect life instead of letting life affect them.  They have control. They have destiny.  They have a legacy. They have agency.

They simply have a life.

Forever Changed...You Cannot Go Back

There is, however, one problem.  And perhaps "problem" is too harsh a word, but a "reality" that has both its pros and cons.

If you make this transformation to a "star" or "steel" human, you are forever changed.  You are no longer a regular human, watching TV, stuck in traffic, working your 9-5 job to pay off your student loans for your Masters in Sociology.  You are no longer a debt-endentured wage slave whose pinnacle joy in life is watching "the game" at "the bar" wearing another man's sports jersey on your back.  You are an exceptionally rare human which, like a particularly galvanized steel, has his/her specific strengths and weaknesses.  And these strengths and weaknesses will set forth the tone for the rest of your life.

First, there is no doubt that you will NOT be wasting your life.  You will live life to its fullest, availing yourself of every second in life god/nature has granted you.  You will also be thankful for each second as you frantically make sure not to squander a second of it.  You will cherish your fellow man.  You will love a quality woman.  You know the tickity-tock is tickity-tocking and you are racing against the clock of life to squeeze every ounce of juice from it before you go back into the unconscious void.

Second, in the wake of this tour-de-force you will leave a legacy of accomplishment and achievement that will not only benefit you in the here and now, but will continue to pay dividends to generations well into the future.  Either through wisdom you have passed onto your children, literary works, artistic works, or any other forms of excellence you have left this world before you left, it will continue to contribute to society and the human race well after you have passed.  This is arguably one of the best litmus tests as to the value of your human worth - did you continue to produce value after you died.

Third, you will at least KNOW that you did not waste your life and you will spare yourself the fate of your common everyday sheeple of cluelessness, delusion, and insanity.  As the normies, conformies, and inferiors continue their lives they way they were programmed to, chasing after easy short cuts, lies, and sweet falsehoods, you will enjoy stability, contentment, excellence, and reality.  Everybody else will enjoy student loans, poverty, materialism, divorce, pop music, pop culture, socialism, the Oscars, and whatever other low-grade slop that makes for their mundane, mediocre lives.  You will be thankful for your successes in life, they will constantly complain about how unfair life was to them.  You will enjoy the intellectual company of others, they will bitch and whine about "Tina at the office."  We will bang sexy hot people.  They will lie to themselves about how sexy tatted up women are, or how ear gauges are cool.  People will actually want to hang out with you, and you them.  The rest of the sheeple will be on constant guard of being taken advantage of by their sheeple peers because neither offers either anything of value but a host-parasite, pareto relationship.  Sanity will be your prize.  Insanity will be their punishment.

But for all those benefits, there are drawbacks.  Namely, you will not be the same person, and you can certainly never, ever go back.

Long ago I was just your average nerd, playing video games and blissfully ignorantly enjoying life.  I could play baseball, play Dragon Warrior, watch Voltron, and go for long bike rides.

Long ago my buddy Lloyd was probably doing the same.  Maybe chasing some girls.  Finding one and getting married blissfully.

And no doubt some of you were married at one time, kids in tow, and life was looking grand.

But then the hellish process of the real world presented itself, often times not giving us the choice of whether we wanted to go through with it.

I had to go to college which was a hellish nightmare of poverty, malnourishment, loneliness, and sub-zero Minnesota cold.

Bob got shipped off to Iraq, got shot at, saw people die, and incidentally got hit with an IED

And then half of you either have or will be getting divorced where everything was hunky dory and BLAMO - "I'm not haaaaaaapppppyyyy."

Most of you reading this either have or will rise to the occasion and overcome.  But after you go through that forging process you will change and not necessarily for the better.

For example, just yesterday I was at a ramen restaurant.  The proprietor and his wife stood in the corner of my eye while I wharfed down the ramen I had just ordered.  I heard them talking about "My goodness, he just shovels it in" shocked at the speed at which I was eating.  But no matter how much money I have, no matter how abundant the food, no matter how much time I have to eat, forever scorched into my brain is starvation and hunger that I will immediately eat as fast as I can because I never know when the next meal is coming or when I'm going to get "a call" that I have to respond to.

Bob, who has it much worse than me, worries that there's a sniper here, an assailant there, or a suicide bomber there.  He's in a small remote town that nobody is ever going to attack him, but he cannot look at the countryside without thinking or theorizing where a potential sniper would be.  Abrupt noises panic him into a defensive mode, fast movements trigger his survival mechanisms, and he sees ghosts of people he's killed.  I'll happily eat fast at the mockery of others not to be in his situation.

And no doubt many of you are suffering side effects of being divorce bombed, having your families destroyed, let alone if you've ever recovered from it.

I call it the "destructive-creative" process because it is DESTRUCTIVE, destroying the individual that once was there and creating a whole new one.  It is truly traumatic in most senses, and though you may be a superior human, it's not as it your previous self hadn't been totally destroyed and the memory of that destruction scorched within your memory.

Better Them Than Us

Still, no matter what the price it's better to be us than them.  Whatever toll or price truly superior people had to pay to become superior, in the end we haven't wasted our lives and we are not like "them."  You could be shot at, starved, bombed, and abused, but if it led to a conscious and accurate assessment of reality, it was worth it.  The lost, wandering cowards, weaklings, and pussies constantly seeking to play life on easy mode will never be able to enjoy it.  Not only because they were never capable of measuring and assessing the real world for what it was, but without the pain and agony to be galvanized into a superior human, they will forever lack the ability to appreciate reality for what it is.  They are on a constant fix-hunt for pretty lies, pretty lies that will damn them to waste their lives.

So embrace and chase the hard work it takes to become a superior person.  Pursue the path that makes you a diamond, a star or some steel.  Because if you don't you'll just be another lump of coal, some hydrogen dust floating in space, a hunk of iron underground, or yet another liberal arts major.  And I can't imagine a fate worse than being just another worthless normie, conformie or inferior.
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