Saturday, March 05, 2016

Feminist Ghostbusters Going Bust

There is not much to say about the upcoming feminist movie “Ghostbusters.”  For those of us who aren’t in the echo chamber of Hollywood and the media, we see this movie for what it is - a truly inferior, slipshod affirmative action piece that is so blatant in its pandering towards “team woman” it’s pretty much insulting everybody. It’s so bad even avid consumers of “Round House Kicking Chick Cop Shows” aren’t swallowing it, as evidenced by its trailer receiving  more downvotes than a Hitler speech in a synagogue. 

But for Hollywood, and by Hollywood, I mean Sony Entertainment, they are so blinded by political correctness, not to mention the fad of taking anything men have made and slapping a “woman” sticker on it, they are completely unaware as to the millions of dollars they’re going to lose on this guaranteed-to-flop movie.  And it is here Hollywood could stand to learn a lesson about the market it’s trying to sell such slop to, as well as a lesson "The Sheeple Society of America" could learn about how Hollywood views them.

Yes, your average American is an idiot.  And yes, you average American woman can be sold a bill of goods if you merely slap the label of “rah rah female” on it.  But what Sony did was take a hallmark of American culture, a genuine apolitical cinematic classic that young and old hold dear to their heats, and shit all over it with politics.  And even the most ardent feminists doesn’t like to see her childhood heroes defecated upon. 

It’s one thing to take obscure comic book heroes, even notable ones, and kill off all the male/white characters.  This is done daily by the basement-dwelling SJW nerds in the bowels of Marvel’s money-losing comic book department.  And you can certainly float trial balloons about turning somebody like James Bond into a black man.  But you NEVER take valued and beloved cultural icons like The Ghostbusters and castrate them, let alone invest money into such a stupid and bigoted venture.  And thus Hollywood (and certainly Sony) is about to learn that this dumber-than-hell strategy of merely “feminizing” or “de-whiting” movies that were already made won’t sell if it’s so blatant that even your average American idiot can see what you’re doing. 

Turning a secondary character like Felix in James Bond from a blond Texan to a black guy?
Sure.  Nobody will notice.

Making a movie about a one-armed woman and calling it “Mad Max?”
Maybe.  Just make sure there’s a flame-throwing guitar player to distract the sheeple.

But taking a childhood hero classic like Ghostbusters and smothering it in “vag?”
No, nobody’s falling for it.

In the end Hollywood needs to take a lesson from the democrat party in Washington DC – If you want to sell shit to minorities and women you need to cover it in soft racism and bigotry.  It can’t be obvious what you’re doing because even the most left-wing minority’s pride and self-respect will be insulted.  But don’t worry, over time you will gently nudge Overton’s window to the left enough that SOME in society will accept a black James Bond, a transvestite Captain Kirk, and an all female Ghostbusters.

Just don’t’ expect these copy-cat, affirmative action, wanna-be movies to be anywhere near as good as the originals.  And don't be shocked when society revolts because they're sick and tired of you trying to shove political-vag down their throats.


southern belle said...

Oh, Cappy, I am praying you are right, and this silly remake is going to bomb! There was something about it on T.V. this morning, and I remember thinking "whose dumbass idea was this?!"

Anonymous said...

Vag. Vag. Vag. Vag. Vag. Vag. Vag.

Jesus Fucking Christ, do you ever suck.

Don't d-bags like you ever die of prostate cancer?

TroperA said...

The sad thing is, even the SJWs it's aimed at will hate it, as evidenced by the large amount of screeching now going on because the black character isn't a scientist.

The Ghostbusters made an X-TREEEEME cartoon sequel series sometime back in the nineties. It starred a "You Go Goth Grrrl", a black, a hispanic and some kid in a wheelchair. It was basically what you'd have if the "Burger King Kid's Club" grew up and started fighting paranormal monsters. And yet it STILL did not pander to its audience as much as Feminist Ghostbusters does.

fed up with stupid motherfuckers said...

Go away you stupid fucking bitch

fed up with stupid motherfuckers said...

Shut the fuck up you stupid bitch

daniel_ream said...

I'm going to disgaree with you that the original Ghostbusters was apolitical. The main antagonist was the EPA, which was portrayed via Walter Peck as sneering, condescending, petty, and smug. The Ghostbusters mortgage themselves to the hilt to start their small business, using unlicensed equipment they built themselves. They nearly go bankrupt, but through luck, perseverance and dedication they create an entirely new service market, where they excel and become heroes.

It's the movie you'd have got if Ayn Rand worked for Saturday Night Live.

Will said...

Somebody got their feeeeewings hurt!

Yes yes! The bitter tears taste the sweetest!

Observasaurus Rex said...

I'm not sure I buy into your prediction. The female ghostbusters has two major things going for it: 1) Nostalgia (Also see Star Wars: Diversity Awakens), and 2) Sci-Fi movie that the average girl might want to see because her rom-com heroine is in it. Since the nostalgic geeks will have been dreaming all their lives of finding a girl that shares their interests (including movie choices), I expect this to largely compensate for the drawdown by those correctly predicting it's fullness of awful.

Agent J said...

Yup. I won't even grace the trailer with a click, no way in hell am I paying money to watch that craptastical farce.

But Captain... Jeffrey Wright totally ruled as Felix. He took a bit player who was somewhere between a blank slate and comedy relief and gave him personality. I missed him in Skyfall and Spectre.

Beef Hambone said...

You must be new to the captain's writing. You can't offend an asshole

Xtrasweettea said...

My wife and I were talking about how this movie's trailers were doing on You Tube. Based on how many dislikes to likes, this movie is looks like it is going to bomb.

One thing I did mention is that a another indicator of how well a movie could do is by the merchandising and toys for that movie. Usually the merchandise and toys get released well before the movie is out in theaters to increase hype. We believe there is a "sweet spot" for merchandising. If merchandise gets released too early, the movie is usually not that good on its own. Same thing if merchandise is released to close to the movie.

My wife and I took a trip to Target and we saw no merchandise or toys for this movie. We saw plenty of merchandising and toys for Batman Vs. Superman.

There is an article that states the toys and merchandise for this movie will be out this summer. Releasing the toys and merchandise so near the movie doesn't help with firing up the hype train when the train should be full speed by the time summer arrives.

This movie was supposed to be released on July 22nd... the release date was moved so that it didn't have to complete with the new Star Trek and the new Ice Age movies which they both release on the 22nd. The week after the 22nd, the new Jason Bourne movie comes out, and the week after that is Suicide Squad. Oh, and the week before July 15th, the new Purge movie is supposed to be released. On the week of July 15th, Ghostbusters only has to compete with an independent movie... this shows that a movie with "strong women leads" can't compete on the same field as these other movies. So much for that "girl power."

Mark Matis said...

They are merely trying to follow NASCAR's lead. There is only one reason why Ms. Patrick has a ride, and it ain't because of her driving skills. She is, however, willing to shake 'em when she's told...

Anonymous said...

I laugh at your tears. Suck it up, buttercup. I'm an asshole. It's what I do.

Tucanae Services said...

Hmmmm. I wonder if one could make a buck in building a derivatives market on how bad, or how much money (or not) a movie makes? Like say sell a short on the new 'Ghostbusters' and make a small fortune.

Anonymous said...


You forget that James Bond, like Dr Who or Holmes and Watson, are foundational and beloved for generations in the commonwealth.

Elementary fails because watson is a chick, and worse, a chinese one. Not the actors (bogh are good) but the smarmy script, and the need to make people normal (Holmes is NOT mormal. that is the point).

Ditto the doctor. The best people in the doctor are the female sidekicks. The doctor must be alien but male to allow the mary sue to occur.

And James Bond has to be a british bastard: he can indeed be a glaswegan scot but fails if Australian (Lazenby) or a Yank.

Besides, the best part is the villian.

Mr.Fruitbaskets said...

Thanks for the follow-up post.

Jade said...

I largely agree with this, but in my opinion, there are some exceptions that prove the rule. I felt that the female Starbuck character in the Battlestar Galactica remake was *amazing,* and I'd definitely thought I'd hate a girl version of that character before the show began. However, it's a shame that so many movies being released now are remakes of a successful movies or t.v. shows or are just sequels. Doesn't anybody have any new ideas any more?

Mr.Cornbread said...

imo elementary fails because holmes doesnt smoke pipes and cigars. For that matter, all the recent holmes spinoffs suck. It's that you're well aware they've pussed out for social reasons that makes these shows lose their magic. Did you see sir ian mkellen in holmes? what a puke-fest!

Anonymous said...

Oh, it's going to suck big time. I'll have better things to do like watching astroturf grow.

Anonymous said...

Ghostbusters is a fundamental part of American culture? When did this happen?

Next we'll be told that Ninja Mutant Turtles is the equivalent of Shakespeare.

The culture turned to chit a long time before 1990.