Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Ode to Rumpleminze

In my superawesome financial classes that I teach, I had a student actually ask about Rumpleminze. My response I realized was an ode to Rumpleminze, so allow me to post it here;

Ah, "cordial" is actually a euphemism. "Super Uber Schnapps" is more like it.

When the economy was booming back in 1998, the problem I faced was not just doing finance seminars, but dance classes as well. My voice started to go because I was speaking/teaching about 3 hours a day and the human vocal chords are just not made for that much use.

Thankfully God created "Rumpleminze" (or at least some alcoholic German did).

And the world was good.

Actually, Rumpleminze is a Canadian schnapps that is VERY thick, is ALWAYS chilled, STRONGLY minty and 50% alcohol.

So when heading back from a dance class or finance seminar in some far flung Minnesota town I would stop in at the local VFW or American Legion (I prefer to give my money to the vets) and 100% guarantee they would have Rumpleminze.

Have a shot of that and you could feel the 27 degree liquid not just coat, but completely revitalize your vocal chords.

Additionally since I started drinking that regularly, I haven't gotten sick in terms of flu, cold, infection, etc. The only thing I've gotten sick from has been food poisoning in the past 8 years. Could be my constitution, but I really do believe it's the Rumpie.


Anonymous said...

Yeah and I hear enough of it can loosen your tongue as well as your vocal cords. Not that I would know anything about that.

Anonymous said...

I understand it has a lowering effect on women's , er, resistance to a good line.

That, coupled with it loosening men's tongues strikes me as a winning combination in the dept of social relations.

Captain Capitalism said...

Rumpleminze also serves as a strong mouth wash. This has helped me on several dates. Not just with my breath, but with helping me not really care too much about the date.

Scott said...

Captain, I must, again, commend you on the excellent recommendation of an adult beverage.

First, I am still making and enjoying Prince Charming Martinis, and have now discovered Rumpleminze, thanks to you. While I am not a big fan of Mint flavors, Rumpleminze is and does exactly as you describe.

Thank you, sir.

Captain Capitalism said...

I am here to make the decline as enjoyable as possible.