I woke up this morning at 1030 AM with no particular obligation.
And the reason I have no particular obligation is because I do not have children. If you don't have children you don't have obligation.
Additionally I have lived very frugally driving nothing by my 1990 Chevy and my 1996 VW. I only bought rental property to ensure I do not bear the full costs of my mortgage. I do not splurge on large ticket items, and though I do permit myself to indulge in a cigar and some finer booze, in the grand scheme of things I probably spend less money than people below the poverty line.
Ergo, my only real obligation today is to teach dance class later on tonight.
In between now and then I plan on using that time to work out, smoke a cigar, write this little post here, go running with a blue eyed babe and perhaps picking up the Captain's Bachelor Pad a bit (only on account my X-Box 360 is on the fritz, in which case I would have played some gamage for a couple hours before class).
Ergo, it's a great life. It's a wonderful life. It's a life most people wish they had. And even though the country is turning to a more socialist bent, in the grand scheme of things, I am still happy and content.
The same cannot be said for Lori Gottlieb.
Lori is a single mother, 30's I presume, and this recently-sent-to-me article confirms that I am indeed onto something and not just blowing smoke or running a self-pity run. The market for honorable, good and decent men is drying up faster than credit did during the housing/financial crash. I will say it again, as I have predicted other crashes before and then maybe someday, somebody, people will listen to the poor ole Captain, but men are exiting the market. They are leaving the game. The market is on the precipice of a crash.
This is sad as the timing of it could not be worse for women. As men have started their exodus, it is NOW (?) when they're in the 30's, perhaps with a couple kids, women start to realize that some semblance of attention has to be paid to what men want? You mean you can't just burden the guy with demands of having 4 children, the means to finance them and afford some discretionary income on top of it? You mean you just don't go to the grocery store and pick out your guy? You mean the guy also picks out you?
For Lori Gottlieb and her previous similarly-minded followers, it's kind of realizing in late 2007 that, "Wait, you mean property values don't always go up? I can't always take out money from my home equity line? You mean rents ultimately drive housing prices?" And thus the crash ensues.
However, I don't see it getting better, let alone a bottom to this particular market crash. The reason I say this is based on my past couple of posts and discussing with those of you who have participated, I see people are operating from the premise that it is presumed men want what Ms. Gottlieb wants; Marriage.
And here's where the bad news, gets worse;
The premise is false for a lot of guys.
Men are leaving the market. And this is the overall point I'm trying to make. They're gone. They're out of the club. They've left the party. The cats are out of the bag. The cows are out of the barn and making a run for the border. Elvis has LEFT the building. Which means they no longer care to get married. If they still did, the cats would still be in the bag, the cows in the barn, Elvis in the building, and the men in the market. I listed my itinerary at the top not to brag, but to show you that the alternative to a married life is not dreary, and dull, and lonely or lifeless. The bachelor life is actually quite easy in that men don't really need a fancy SUV to pick up the non-existent children. The bachelor life is affordable in that we throw in a pizza, maybe go out on happy hour to avail ourselves of some great-price apps, or perhaps we go out and treat ourselves to a fine dinner with our buds (and may I point out only have to pay for one dinner).
It is this that the Lori Gottlieb's of the world have to realize. They're not competing against other women for a dwindling supply of men. They competing against the bachelor lifestyle. They're battling the gravitational forces of a content, happy, and above all, a financial secure bachelor lifestyle. Void of divorce, void of having to support a family, void of any responsibility aside from oneself. It is an incomprehensible amount of freedom for a man to pursue and do whatever he wants, and in the literal sense allows them to be man-children (except now we have lot's of great new toys!)
Now I know those of you out there who are trying to help the good ol' Captain. I know those of you out there, and I agree with you, that there are good people out there. I know that.
However, my point is not a personal one, and certainly not one that applies to everybody. It is a generational and generalized one in that this is a trend. An economic observation that has ramifications for society at large. And all I am trying to point out is that when I see these "where is my knight in shining armor" stories, I find it necessary to point out a rapidly increasing percentage of the knights have hung up their armor and are now playing Call of Duty 4.
The question is whether the majority of love/marriage-lorn 30 something women realize that too.