Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Milltronic Machines Morons

Company in Waconia "can't find the precisely, finely tuned, only to our specified product line and business model, fresh out of college, ready and competent, labor" to fill their jobs.

Because, of course, you could major in "Milltronic Machines" at the U of MN.

I remember that being a very popular major in my day. Many students majored in "Milltronic Machines."

Yep, to get that PRECISE, FINITE, SPECIFIC training to fill that PRECISE, FINITE, SPECIFIC job.

Oh, no.

No no no no no no no!

It's below Milltronics Machines to create an (GASP NO!) ON THE JOB TRAINING PROGRAM!!!!!!!!!! (enter 50's chick screaming here). That would cost TOO MUCH MONEY for some aging geezer to get off his ass and maybe train the next generation to do what he does. No, that kid should HAVE KNOWN EXACTLY WHAT TO DO once he left the IT department at the U of MN.

Look, I'm just as ready as the next guy to lecture and berate idiotic Minnesotan suburbanite children for majoring in "Musical Therapy," but you gray hairs in industry better come to grips with the reality real fast that labor can't just go from school to the assembly line without SOME training.

Honest to god, sometimes I think the Gen Y OWS brats actually have a point. But what do I know? I'm sure simply telling youth today that they "need to hit the ground running" is the equivalent of a significant and thorough training program equipping them with the skills they need to do a successful and productive job. I know I loved it when my bosses said to me "I don't have time to explain this to you." Or quoted the holy chant "this is a steep learning curve." Yep, that sure prepared me for the job at hand!

Am I the only one here who isn't a moron?


Justin said...

Maybe they should hire some Liberal Arts majors. I hear they have an edge over those STEM idiots.

Amateur Strategist said...

Indeed. I try to think of any other way this would be going down that doesn't make them look like complete idiots.

So far, the only idea I have is that they only SAY they are "hiring" but they "can't find anybody" so that they look like "oh, we're so great and charitable in these tough times, we're hiring! See? We're HIRING!" When in reality it just a publicity stunt that they do not intend to pay for (by actually hiring).

Read a blog recently by a real smart guy looking to work for a finance company. Said they could not take the week or so to train him and they needed someone now. Well, a month went by and they were still advertising that same position... interesting.

Jose said...

In the words of a blogger I follow:

Enjoy the decline!


Paul E. Zimmerman said...

Sounds like a place I'm part-timing at while I get my business off the ground. They have no formal training to speak of - they don't even have an employee manual - but they lose their f'ing minds if an employee makes a mistake due to a lack of knowledge about policies, procedures, production techniques, etc. That hell hole can probably survive the stupidity of the approach to running it currently on display there (maybe), but a high tech operation? No chance.

Jay said...

I think Gen Y might just become the unwitting John Galt.

Because BBs were too lazy to train Gen Y and just told them to major in anything Gen Y will not be able to get jobs to pay the BBs retirement.

Anonymous said...

This happens in Canada all the time. A company sets a very impossible exact requirement for a job and when they can't find it they can go overseas and find someone who has the exact requirements they are looking for (or someone who will work heaper)because someone somewhere bothered to train them. I have a well paying as secure as a job gets now but when I was trying to find employement in the past, these policies meant that instead competing against Ontarians, or Canadians I had to compete against the entire world. - minuteman

Izanpo said...

This is merely a symptom of the disease: Companies don't want to invest their employees because they view them as disposable. And yet, ironically, they demand 100% unwavering loyalty from those employees.

There's your Boomer Business Model.

I worked at this one crap temp job at a factory making transmission parts. They were "training" me to use a particular CNC lathe. That lasted for about 2 nights, until I found out from the stuporvisor that the lathe was being crated up and shipped to another plant in 2 weeks.

Every one of those factories I worked at was top-heavy with managers.

Pulp Herb said...

There is one important thing in this story:

Company officials say they can't find enough skilled labor and blame parents for not allowing their children to study a trade after high school.

Our "everyone has to go to college" mentality has meant:

1. We don't encourage people to enter trades.
2. We don't have many HS trades programs left.

We do tax these businesses with local property taxes to provide schools. I can see some argument on their part the schools could return the favor and offer basic machine tool skills that could feed an apprenticeship program there.

Of course, their German counterparts are more than happy the the MN HS's don't have such programs and the companies don't have apprenticeships.

Anonymous said...

Yep I remember reading about one IT job some years back where effective they were looking for a "recent grad" with 5 years of experience.. specifically in a product that had been out 2 years.

And this happens in Engineering too, hire a green guy out of college ...ahahahahahah. You have no experience...

Once you have a M.Sc.E. "we can't hire you for an entry level job" you are too qualified ( WTF? Because I wrote a Master Thesis in some obscure engineering science topic? Qualified for WHAT?)
But we can't hire you for anything higher because you have no experience?


Ping Jockey said...

This reminds me so much of the idiots that won't interview you unless you have experience ("experienced only need apply"), yet how can you have experience unless you are hired?

When I was going through college it was common sense that your degree was only good for 'book learning' -- you actually needed to have on-the-job experience to become proficient in your specialty. (I have an AAS in Mechanical Technology; I was working on my Bachelor's when the economy tanked in the 80's and I got laid off and had to leave school before finishing.)

It seems that businesses would rather grouse about 'there not being any qualified applicants' than actually hire someone who has the education AND is eager to learn, but lacks the training.

Bruce Gold said...

interesting article and a good example of supply and demand. Many companies are still working on the labour glut model of the market. Remember baby boomers had a massive labour bulge moving thru the market, mass immigration and women doubling their labour force participation. Employers got fat lazy and stupid because they could. IN your analysis of unemployment you factor in labour force dropouts and population but never seem to figure in the 100,000 plus new workers that come into the Us every month.

Captain Capitalism said...

Talking illegals or the skill labor from China/India?

Quartermain said...

This job/experience catch-22 has been going on, at least, since the late '70's.

The late boomers, gen-x, gen-y, and the mils have suffered through all of this.

The aversion to on the job training has been going for over 30 years without an end in sight.

CC, keep up the good work.