Monday, November 12, 2012

You All Just Paid My Rent

As you know your beloved Captain has"special gift."  And that "special gift" is the natural and unconscious ability to irk and piss off authority, bosses, supervisors and bureaucratic types without even trying.  Could be my demeanor, could be my lack of patience for politics, corruption and lying.  Could be I'm not an obedient type.  Whatever it is, I do it better than anybody I know and deep down inside I think most of us like it when somebody tells an incompetent or corrupt boss to shove it.

Well Cappy Cappites, good news.

Not only can we all give our previous bosses the proverbial bird, we can now add icing to the cake because you all just made me enough money to pay for my rent via my Amazon Affiliate program.

If you don't know already, in addition to books, I make money on this thing called the "Amazon Affiliate Program" and NO it isn't one of those "ponzi multi-level marketing things."

How it works is that instead of you spending the time, money  and gas going to Wal-Mart or a store, you show the Captain your love by clicking on the Amazon link in the right sidebar and buying whatever you need (and TRUST ME, Amazon has WHATEVER YOU NEED!).  During your browsing/shopping session items you buy are assigned a code indicating you came from this here blog.  And then, whatever you buy, toilet paper, video games, mittens, etc., is not only conveniently shipped right to your house, the ole Captain gets a 6-8% commission on those purchases.

  • You get stuff you HAD TO GET ANYWAY
  • The Captain gets a little commish on the side
  • We all share "Warm Cappy Cap Fuzzies"

All it takes is a simple mental adjustment to realize, "hey , wait, I can get that cheaper on Amazon and don't have to drive to Wal-Mart AND the Captain gets warm fuzzies."  Everyday you have to buy something, so you might as well buy it here. And if you REALLY want to help the ole Captain out, it's as simple as book-marking the Amazon page in the "Favorites" list on your browser.

As I said before, you all bought enough this past month that it covers my net mortgage payment.  I thought it was going to be beer money when I first set up the program.  But regardless the freedom you guys afford me by being thoughtful enough to purchase your items through here means the world to me and for that I am very thankful.

Besides, just imagine all those middle management banker types who swore I would fail.  Now they watch me sleep in till 10AM everyday, write books AND still make a living.  You can not only enjoy their misery and envy as they try to collect SBA ARC loan guarantees (just a little inside humor there), you can contribute to their misery by buying your wares via the Ole Captain and rub it in their faces.

And what's more fun than pissing off inept, corrupt bankers!


taterearl said...

Pissing off liberals. Sure they are always somewhat pissed...but I like to make them go nuclear.

Altimanix said...

I have had the pleasure of walking away from a job before - great feeling of freedom.

Since then I went self-employed which is pretty good too:

Office politics - nope, not interested
Work extra (unpaid) hours for a vague promise of stock / bonuss / promotion - nope, cash now or no deal.
Same old, same old - a bit, but at least you can change to a new location and meet new people.

Andrew said...

BTW guys: When he means anything he means anything. Go ahead and type "Tapco" into the search bar.

Plenty of warm fuzzies for the captain coming your way.

I just picked up a Beretta Neos and now I have to buy a red dot sight for it. Why? Because it has a rail on top.

Anonymous said...

Question: Do you still get a kickback if I use an amazon gift card to pay for stuff? I'm considering just asking for that for the holiday season.

Aaron's old boss said...

But you have to come back! We've been shorthanded since three women went on paid maternity leave.

Captain Capitalism said...

Anon 756,

Yeah, it should work. The payment method shouldn't matter.


Heh, that would put a serious dent operations. Time to shut down unprofitable branches to save money!

CBMTTek said...

Been buying from Amazon via your links for a few months now. Not sure how much you have picked from me, but I am glad to help.

And, Andrew is quite correct. Not only can you acquire important and valuable materials for your self protection, but I have purchased quite a few auto parts as well.

Paul E. Zimmerman said...

You forgot to mention one of the most important benefits of the online shopping experience: not being stuck in line behind moron customers who team up with a moron cashier to make your time as unproductive as possible.

Paul E. Zimmerman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Does the referral work for non-American shoppers? We Canadians get directed to

CBMTTek said...


Following the election, I decided to start taking a stronger look at the businesses I support. Specifically, those that have a unionized workforce. Unions strongly support the Democrat agenda, I strongly disagree with that agenda, therefore, I cannot in good conscience patronize a business with a union workforce.

If the business is unionized, and I have an alternative, I will shop the alternative, and I will let the business (and union) know exactly why I am doing so.

So, I took a look into Amazon, and I am glad to see they are anti-union. Oh, and this guy gives us another 9 reasons why I will continue to provide them with my business.

Keep up the good work, and remember, America does not work at all when you say Union YES!