Friday, May 10, 2013

Associates Degree in Heavy Metal

For the Patron Saint's Name of Frick.

From our British Agent in the field.

Again, I REALLY should be sipping a cocktail on a beach for the rest of my days as EVERY student and parent in America should be reading this book.


John McNeill said...

I love heavy metal, but I don't need a degree to learn about it. My cds, YouTube,, Wikipedia, and my bass provide the education.

Anonymous said...

I don't see how this is worse than any other degree in music. About time metal got some respect.

Phillyastro said...

No one should be let near a college or university unless they are fluent in Latin, Greek, calculus or statistics. If you can't comprehend any of these subjects, go learn a trade.

Anonymous said...

If you want to play heavy metal, go to Berklee College of Music in Boston. Then, follow rule 26 of The 101 Rules of Prog Metal:

"Never accept ANY Berklee graduates. The drop-outs are so much better."

Anonymous said...

Worthless degree, regardless of type of music studied.

V10 said...

Well, if you're going to get a worthless degree anyway, you might as well get a cool one.

Unknown said...

You can't make this stuff up. There needs to be a Family Guy Studies and a South Park Studies degree next. Haw!

Bill said...

I'll demand that our local college offer a baccalaureate degree in the Art and Science of Machinegunnery.

It would be a rigorous three year course the centerpiece being the renowned M240, officially Machine Gun, 7.62mm, M240, is the US military designation for the FN MAG (Mitrailleuse d'Appui Général, meaning General Purpose Machine Gun), a family of belt-fed, gas-operated medium machine guns firing the 7.62×51mm NATO cartridge, a.k.a. the MAG 58.

Coverage would, of course, include the smaller caliber SAWs in 5.56 MM NATO, and third year students would spend most of the school year on the care, feeding and proper employment of the awesome "Ma Deuce" properly known as the .50 Browning Machine Gun (.50 BMG) or 12.7×99mm NATO.

Students will spend much time in group socializing officially known as Cleaning After Firing.

A masters program is contemplated and could possibly involve the application of auto-cannon, 20MM to 30MM, to tactical problems.

Just an idea i'm stroking while swishing good scotch around in my metal cup.

crabstampede said...

i would say its value directly correlates with how well you can sweep pick on graduation day